Oblivion
by Raye Lynne
Summary: When Momo discovers the truth about her beloved Aizen, and Tōshirō struggles to help her move on, the two find themselves becoming closer than they foresaw. But after a huge fight Momo flees to Hueco Mundo! Can Tōshirō save her from running to her death?
1. Chapter 1: Breaking Point

A/N: Yo, peoples

A/N: Yo, peoples. For those of you who are new to the convoluted depths of my mind, welcome. For my friends, welcome back.

Normally, when I start a story, I know exactly what I will write about. Not so much this time. I'm writing this as I read the series, so it will likely follow Kubo-san's plot for a few chapters before it takes its own turn. However, feel free to review or PM me with suggestions I'll credit you if I end up using them:).

Also, I will do my best to make this a stand-alone story, but it would help if you are familiar with at least the first 100 chapters of bleach. (And, if you are between chapters 100-167, beware of spoilers!)

Okay, I'm done talking. Here we go…

**Chapter One: Breaking Point **

_-Hinamori Momo_

I moved swiftly forward, both my pace and my breath quickening as I rounded the corner. The Central 46 Chamber loomed in front of me; large, imposing – a challenge. I could see neither Matsumoto-san nor Captain Hitsugaya, but I knew they were inside.

_Captain Hitsugaya…_

Even the thought of his name formed a lump in my throat and sent my thoughts in a whirl of confusion.

Our relationship had not been one that can easily be described. We did have a lot in common. Not only had we grown up together, there was our closeness in age and our prodigious abilities that had made our entrance into the Gotei 13 possible, making him the youngest-ever captain, and I, the youngest lieutenant. I suppose, in an unusual sense of the phrase, I could call him my best friend.

But he had always seemed so…protective of me. Though I cannot imagine why – we are not even of the same company. Despite this, I had always thought…that I could…

…trust him.

But now – everything had changed. All of a sudden, I couldn't trust anyone.

_Captain Aizen…_

The lump in my throat swelled, and my eyes brimmed with tears, but I swallowed, blinking them back.

The horror of being the first to see my captain's murdered corpse will never leave me; of that I am certain. I felt as though whoever had thrust their blade through his heart had killed me, too. Buried under sorrow and blind rage, my judgment had deserted me. The moment I had seen Captain Ichimaru standing there, with his ever-present disconcerting smile, I had immediately known – or thought I had known – that he was the murderer. Without thinking, I had drawn Tobiume and lunged at him. If Kira-kun had not defended him, I would not have hesitated to kill him. I was even prepared to fight Kira-kun, my friend through all our years of training, but Captain Hitsugaya had ordered us both arrested before we could proceed.

I had been angry then. _Why? Why couldn't he let me…? He knows how much Captain Aizen meant to me. My mentor, my guardian – I had always adored him, even before I joined the Gotei 13. But as his assistant captain, he was like – a father to me._

_I loved him._

Then, later, Assistant Captain Matsumoto had brought me the letter. Aizen-sama's letter. Again, I had been overcome by emotion, honoured that my captain's last words were for me.

But, as I read it, the horror returned. With the recent events, it nearly made sense, in a twisted way. But I still didn't want to believe it. For, in his own calligraphy, the one my idol had named as his killer was none other than –

_Captain Hitsugaya!_

-_Hitsugaya Tôshirô_

Matsumoto and I stood in shock at the sight that lay before us_. _

The forty-six council members – every single one of them –

_Dead._

The entire room reeked with the sour odor of long-dried blood. I did not glance at Matsumoto's face, nor did I need to, for I knew that her thoughts would be evident, and that they would exactly match my own.

_Who could have done such a thing? And why?_

One thing was grimly certain. Every order we had received from the council for the past several days had not been from the council at all.

The execution date of Kuchiki Rukia being moved ever sooner.

The orders to find and destroy the invading Ryoka.

All from someone else.

Another piece of the puzzle had fallen into place. But only the outside had been filled in. I had yet to find who stood in the gaping hole that was the centre of it all. Aizen's murder, the false orders, the schism of the Gotei 13.

_Who?_

I, much like Hinamori, had my suspicions of Ichimaru Gin. He possessed not one iota of my trust, and I had outright vowed to kill him if he ever harmed Momo. Though she did not know it I had had her arrested for her own safety. Though she was an adept fighter and highly skilled in the demon arts, she often let her emotions control her – now more so than ever. I could see she would get herself hurt – especially if she strayed too close to Gin. I hadn't any choice, really, but to put her in a cell. I myself had put up the protective shield around it.

Not to keep her inside.

To keep everyone else out.

At that moment, my eyes caught a flicker of movement in one corner of the room, at the same instant Matsumoto hissed, "Tôshirô!"

I saw it then – the flash of a lieutenant's badge bound to his upper arm. Three black slashes indicated the sign of the third company.

"It's Kira!" I shouted, but he was already running.

"Let's go!" I called. "After him, Matsumoto!"

_-Hinamori Momo_

Though Captain Hitsugaya's shield would work for the purpose of keeping others out, I was determined not to let it keep me in – I had to go after him.

By masking my spiritual pressure, I was able to slip right through the shield. After that, I followed Captain Hitsugaya's footsteps exactly, keeping my spiritual pressure surpressed so I could remain undetected. When the moment was right, I would confront him. I would not rest until I had, at the very least, an explanation.

I had already decided, too, that I would kill him if it became necessary.

_-Hitsugaya Tôshirô_

Though Matsumoto and I ran with great speed, Kira had had a head start, and we were hard-pressed to catch him.

"Kira!" I yelled out, without slackening pace. "Is this your doing?!"

He didn't even look back as he replied, "I have done nothing here, Captain."

"Then why do you run?!" I called, frustrated.

Abruptly, he stopped and turned, his breathing slightly labored.

"Haven't you realized?" he said. "Don't you know the one you should be concerned about now is – Hinamori?"

My steps faltered, and I stopped in my tracks. Matsumoto, now unsure of what to do, stopped also, although we were now within six feet of Kira.

"What do you mean about Hinamori?" I demanded, fighting back the fear that threatened to break into my voice.

He did not respond right away. In fact, he seemed to be focused entirely on something else.

"Start talking, Kira," ordered Matsumoto.

"Well," he said, slowly and deliberately, "hasn't it occurred to you that a protective shield is only any good if the person inside wants to be protected?"

"What – are – you – _saying?_" I hissed through gritted teeth.

Kira's voice rang with obvious relish, though, as always, his narrow features betrayed no expression.

"Hinamori – has escaped. She's been following you for hours, Hitsugaya-san."

My chest tightened and, beside me, I heard Matsumoto take in a sharp breath.

At that moment, I realized three glaring truths.

First, if Hinamori was following me so obsessively, given the present circumstances, she must be laboring under some sort of false impression. And I could guess right away what that impression likely was.

_She can't think – _I _killed Aizen? _

But there were some who would derive great pleasure from tormenting her by telling her the supposed 'truth'. What if this was told to her so she would avoid me…? No, she would start following me – like now – retracing my trail so relentlessly that she wouldn't even take the time to… look behind her…

…which only reiterated the second truth? Momo was far beyond my help – I couldn't shield her if I couldn't find her, and doubtless she was cloaking her spiritual pressure, or I would know she was gone.

Third…

_Kira!_

I knew what he had been so focused on.

He was counting seconds.

_A distraction!_

And if Kira, lieutenant of the third company, was involved, that could only mean…

_Ichimaru Gin!_

_-Hinamori Momo_

I could wait no longer. I had to reach him before he left.

I reached the doors of the Central 46 Chamber, then hesitated. I now remembered what had seemed so odd about how Captain Hitsugaya and Matsumoto-san entered.

Always, one needed permission from someone inside the building to enter. From following the pair, I knew they had none.

_How, then?_

But I had other answers to discover first.

Taking a calming breath, I pushed open the door, and stepped through the narrow, yet towering, doorway.

There were a few steps down a hallway, shrouded in darkness, but then I passed through another doorway and found myself in a room bathed in glaring light.

If only it had been blinding, and then I wouldn't have had to see all the bodies of the council members – all forty-six of them – and the black blood that crusted every surface.

I stifled a shriek and fought to slow my pounding heart.

_Hitsugaya-kun?_

_No, he couldn't!_

_But Aizen-sama…_

All of the blood was dry, so it was impossible for Captain Hitsugaya to have killed them.

_It only proves he didn't kill them just now, anyway._

I had to choke back a sob.

_Hitsugaya-kun, what have you done?_

I took another breath and affirmed my resolve.

_I can't weaken now…_

At that moment, a hand fell upon my shoulder, capturing me in an unshakeable grip. I was frozen, too frightened to scream.

A cool, mocking voice whispered in my ear: "Welcome, Hinamori." I shuddered, and felt the blood drain from my face.

_Captain Ichimaru…_

_-Hitsugaya T__ôshirô_

"Matsumoto." I struggled to keep my voice from breaking. "Can you handle him?"

Kira turned and ran; the coward.

"Yes, sir," she replied.

"Then, please –"

"On it!" And then she was gone, running with her feline grace. I was not worried for her – though she may not appear as such, Matsumoto-san was a lethal force in combat. Kira would be no match for her.

But Hinamori versus Gin – Gin was a master of tricks and traps, and Hinamori, inhibited by rage and sorrow as she was, would be more than likely to fall.

Without pausing to regain any strength, I ran back the opposite way, doubling my pace. I could not afford to come too late. I had to arrive before –

--what, exactly?

_-Hinamori Momo_

At an unspoken command, I followed Captain Ichimaru back across the hall to a much smaller room, this one almost completely dark, lit only in one place by a dusty shaft of light that seemed to spiral down from the one cracked window.

A pressure fell upon my shoulders as I stepped through the door, and my breath caught in my chest. It was like a warning – an overwhelming sense of foreboding that urged me to run away. But the captain guarded the only door. Though he stood almost casually, I knew I was not going to be allowed to leave.

I swallowed, but my voice trembled anyways. "W-why have you brought me here, Captain Ichimaru?"

When the captain of the third company spoke, the note of amusement that always resided in his voice was far more prominent. "Why, there's someone here who wants to see you, Hinamori-chan."

His pretense at friendliness only served to make me even less at ease.

"S-s-someone to s-see – me?"

His smile widened, if that was even possible.

"He's behind you."

I had forgotten how to think, how to move, how to cry out. I could only repeat back what he said to me.

"Behind – me?"

With a feeling of being utterly powerless, I slowly turned my head. Was it even of my own volition?

I would never know.

My eyes were fixed upon the square of light on the floor. A figure, robed in shadows, was barely visible above it.

And then – in the time it took to take one step, in the blink of an eye – I found myself staring up at the face of a man I had never dreamed I would ever see again.

I was overwhelmed by a flood of emotion; my breath came in rapid gasps.

"C-Ca-Captain Aizen!"

He smiled, that warm, gentle smile that had always been able to wash all my troubles away, and didn't fail to do so now.

"Hello, Hinamori-kun."

Drawn to him, I took several steps closer, until we both were coated in the dancing light.

"Captain Aizen – is it really you?" I reached out my hand; I had to touch him, to make sure he was real.

He chuckled softly, a sound that made my heart resonate with joy. He took his own hand and placed it on the top of my head, just as he had always done.

"I am here, Hinamori-kun."

I was full to bursting with happiness, nearly shaking with contained feeling. I wanted to laugh; I wanted to scream with happiness; I wanted to ask a thousand questions; I wanted to throw my arms around him and never, never let go. But I kept it down inside; I would not make a fool of myself in front of my captain.

"There was something I needed to do; something very important," Aizen-sama explained in his wonderful, calming voice – the most beautiful voice in the world. "It required that everyone believed I was dead." Gently, he took my face in his hands and tilted it up so he could look in my eyes. _"Everyone."_

I nodded, afraid to speak, lest I should say far too much.

"I wanted very much to tell you, Momo. But I wasn't able to. Do you understand?"

I nodded again, closing my eyes to preserve everything about this moment in my memory forever. His warm, gentle hands, cradling my face; the sound of his voice sending shivers dancing over my skin; even his smell comforted me, the smell that represented no tangible thing, that was just _him_, nothing but him. If I'd had any doubts that this man was an imposter, they vanished the moment I inhaled his scent.

"I can see that you were most concerned for me."

Once more, I nodded, squeezing my eyes shut tighter, but a single teardrop escaped.

"I'm very sorry to have worried you, Hinamori-kun."

_I don't mind! _I wanted to say. _All I care about is that you're alive! You're here and you're alive, and I will never leave your side again, never!_

At that moment, I couldn't take it anymore; I burst into tears. I pulled my head away from my captain and buried my face in my own hands, ashamed of my weakness.

But then his strong arms encircled me and held me close as my body shook with sobs. The beating of his heart – his whole, living heart – only made me cry harder.

"I'm s-s-so s-sorry C-Captain." I choked the words out through my tears. "I'm just s-so h-happy that y-you're h-h-here ag-g-gain. S-s-so h-h-ha-happy." And I wrapped my arms around him, too.

_I want to stay like this forever..._

"Ah, Hinamori…always so faithful – so loyal – so caring," he said, his voice no louder than a whisper. I could feel the vibrations deep in his chest.

"I want you to know, Momo," he said, lowering his voice even more, "that I am truly happy to have you as my subordinate."

There was nothing but him, and his voice, and those words, ringing through me and bringing my elation to higher than what I could have known was possible.

"Thank you, Hinamori-kun. Thank you so much."

I closed my eyes again, fully content. My breathing calmed and slowed, and everything was so quiet, I could hear his lips part to form one final word.

"Goodbye."

My eyes snapped open and my sense of peace was shattered. That one word echoed through my mind.

_Goodbye_

_Goodbye_

_Goodbye_

_Goodbye, Hinamori_

_Goodbye_

And, right then, time all but stopped.

I was suddenly aware that Captain Ichimaru had never left the room. He had been there, watching, listening, this entire time, and I could feel his gaze on my back, sending the hairs on my neck into a cold prickle.

_He can't be trusted. I should take my captain away from here, where he will be safe. I am no better than a prisoner here in Aizen-sama's arms until I am sure he is safe._

I opened my mouth to speak, but there came only a gasp as I felt a sharp pain in the centre of my chest.

The pain gave way from sharp to excruciating as Aizen-sama's zanpaku-tô pierced my heart.

Time returned to normal then, but it still did not go quickly enough.

It was a terrifying sensation, watching my own blood pool around me. The only reason I was still able to stand is because I was impaled upon Aizen-sama's blade.

_No. There has to be a reason. He wouldn't do this to me._

I turned my head to look my captain in the eyes. What I saw was even more horrible than when I thought I had seen him dead. There was love in those eyes, no compassion. They were empty, devoid of all feeling. His mouth lay as a straight, unmoving line. His entire face was a mask of utter indifference.

With my last breath, I gasped, desperate, "It – can't – be."

With my eyes, I begged him to tell me there was a reason. That it was for some greater goo that I had to die. But he didn't even blink as he pulled his zanpaku-tô from my body. Too weak to support myself, I collapsed, feeling my shoulder break as I hit the floor, while my captain watched.

The complete agony I was enduring – the physical as well, but much, much more so the emotional – was too much. The pain threw me over the brink of consciousness and, though I knew I would never again awaken, I did not fight, but let myself fall.


	2. Chapter 2: Powerless

Disclaimer: I do not own "Bleach", or any of its characters. Heck, for now, I don't even really own the plot, just the narration and the editing I've done to the dialogue. I wish I did though, because it's a work of freaking genius!!

Anyways, back to the story.

Chapter Two: Powerless

_Hitsugaya Tôshirô _

I ran down the hall, going too fast even to hear my feet hitting the floor. At this point, my breath should be coming in gasps, but I refused to let myself be exhausted. Having no idea what awaited me, I would need every ounce of my strength.

The hallway seemed to elongate as I made my way through it, and it was maddening; this feeling of going nowhere, making no headway whatsoever.

_Hinamori; Hinamori, just hold on…_

…_I'm coming, Momo._

Without warning, two figures, both wearing the white captain's coats over their black robes, strode from the doorway just in front of me. I stumbled to a halt. Closet to me was Ichimaru Gin, who appeared startled to see me. I could not see who was behind him, only crown of thick brown hair. I tried to move around Gin, but he matched me step for step, grinning, of course, seemingly insistent on concealing from me his partner.

_Bastard._

Regardless of the identity of this new captain, presumably Aizen's replacement, I had no time for this. I made to force my way past Gin – even if I wasn't desperate, I never really bothered with courtesies with him – but I froze when the other captain spoke.

"Gin – what are you doing?"

_That voice…_

_I would know it anywhere._

"It would appear that I overestimated Kira's ability to provide a suitable distraction."

"No matter. What's done is done." The other captain – no replacement at all – stepped into my line of vision.

"Yo, Hitsugaya-kun," said Aizen.

"A-Aizen? Are you really Aizen?"

"Everything you see here is real Hitsugaya-kun. Everything." He ran his eyes over me from head to toe, and back again.

"Indeed, he is in much better condition than I had hoped for."

Gin's smile made the slight transition to a sneer. "Kira is worthless."

Aizen sighed. "A shame, really. He showed so much potential in the training years."

A sense of wariness crept over me, sending prickling sensations over my skin.

"What are you talking about?" I asked, pretending I could care less.

Aizen dismissed this with a casual wave of his hand. "Just discussing strategy."

Now my guard was up. "What do you mean…?"

Aizen smiled and, in that second, I realized my fears were quite rational. "Distractions are an effective military ploy, wouldn't you say? It is much easier to triumph by spreading your enemy as thin as possible."

My teeth clenched. '''Enemy'?!"

_It was him all along!_

My hand itched to fly to the handle of my zanpaku-tô, but I willed myself not to act rashly. I had to learn as much as I could—

With a jolt, I noticed Aizen had already drawn his own blade. In fact, he'd been holding it at his side the entire time…

A cold pit formed in my stomach, draining all the heat from my limbs. The blade was crimson with blood and, as I watched, a drop formed at the tip and fell into the small puddle that had formed on the ground.

I swallowed, yet it took every ounce of willpower to keep my voice level. "Where is Hinamori?"

Aizen's smile widened so that it could now be compared to Gin's.

"Where, indeed?"

"You sick bastard," I snarled. Lunging forward, I leapt between where they stood, flanking the doorway they had just come through. Neither one made a move to stop me, and that was anything but comforting.

"Hinamori?...Hinamori?!"

There was nothing; nothing but my own voice, echoing from the wall I could not see in the darkness.

My eyes were pulled to the only source of light in the room – a large square on the floor – and the unmoving black form that lay within it.

I felt my heart pounding in my ears and each step forward was a titanic effort. For I already knew what I would see – but I was far from ready to see it.

_No, no, Hinamori; no…_

Three more steps and I would have to see…

…two more steps…

…one…

I had myself braced for the worst, but this was far more terrifying than that.

"Hi-Hinamori?"

Though it was quite obvious there would be no answer.

_Hinamori – Hinamori_

Blood; blood everywhere –

_This can't be._

--its bitter tang stinging my nose.

_All my fault…_

Completely motionless, facedown, her left arm twisted into an unnatural position –

_If I hadn't – Kira—not fast enough –_

Her eyes open and glassy –

_Momo…_

"No." This last came fainter than a whisper.

_Everything you see here is real, Hitsugaya-kun._

_Everything._

"Ah, so you found her, did you?"

_Aizen!_

I whirled on the spot to find him standing in the doorway, his loyal dog, Gin, watching over his shoulder.

He looked me directly in the eyes. "I'm sorry. It wasn't my intention to traumatize you."

_That was exactly your intention you sadistic fu –_

"If I had known you would be back here so quickly" – another disgusting smile – "I would have sliced her into unrecognizable pieces."

Red blurred the corners of my vision, and I was shaking with rage.

"How long have you been--?"

"From the very beginning. Since I became a captain."

There was only one more obvious question. "Why?"

"Isn't it obvious?" He chuckled, but there was no mirth in it. "It's quite simple. There are worlds of power out there, for the taking. I will only be content when they are all under my control."

"So you've deceived us all," I spat.

"That is where you're wrong Hitsugaya-kun. You all saw what you wanted to see. Well—" he paused. "Maybe I had to help you decide what to see.

"You understand that my zanpaku-tô has proven very useful in my endeavors. After all, its power is – complete hypnosis."

_Hypnosis! I always knew…we all knew… but we never even questioned…_

"So really, you all saw what I wanted you to see."

"That's the same thing as deception!" I raised my voice, the sound producing a faint echo. "You _lied._ To everyone. To Kira-kun – to me—" my throat contracted – "to _Hinamori._"

Aizen only laughed, a sound that couldn't have been further from the voice everyone had come to know. Gin joined in, like the two were sharing a joke – at Momo's expense.

"_Hinamori worshipped you!" _I hollered, the room and the hallway ringing with my fury. "She's idolized you all her life! You were her inspiration for joining the Gotei 13, and she worked unspeakably hard so she could serve alongside you!"

Aizen remained completely unperturbed. "I know. Why else do you think I nominated her to be my lieutenant? Since I joined the Gotei 13, I have though of no one but Ichimaru-kun as my vice-captain. Hinamori was nothing but a prop."

My hands were clenched into fists, and my fingernails dug into my palms. My entire body was rigid, every muscle tensed.

"Don't look so angry, Hitsugaya-kun. Hinamori was quite happy to be manipulated. After all, when someone admires you, they'll do anything for you."

"Aizen Sôsuke. » My words did not waver – proof that I had surpassed anger and gone onto something far more profound. "I am going to kill you."

Gin's hand flew to the hilt of his zanpaku-tô, but Aizen calmed him with a gesture. He stared at me with an expression of disdain, and his eyes glittered with malice.

"Don't use such strong words," he cautioned. "They make your weakness that much more apparent."

I could no longer contain myself; my spiritual energy rose above control. The energy exploded out from me, sending a web of cracks through the walls and raising an enormous cloud of dust and rubble – a perfect smokescreen. Giving myself over to my battle instincts, I leapt through the doorway and into the hall once more, so I would no longer be trapped in that room.

Before my feet touched the ground, my zanpaku-tô was out of its sheath. The instant I landed, I assumed the combat stance.

I cried out the release command for my blade. "Rain across the frozen heavens, Hyôrinmaru!"

The dust was beginning to settle, and Aizen was making his way over to me, with Gin waiting off to the side, ready to jump in should anything go wrong.

_No time to waste, then._

Focusing myself, I blocked out everything that had happened in the past few minutes. There was only myself and Aizen.

_The enemy._

I raised my zanpaku-tô above my head.

_"Bankai!"_

The air around me shimmered with the sheer force of all my power.

_"Daiguren, Hy__ôrinmaru!__"_

Glassy wings of ice erupted from my shoulders, and spread to their eighteen-foot span around me. Ice flowers hung suspended in the air behind me – the essence of Hyôrinmaru in all its glory.

Aizen advanced towards me, shaking a few loose rocks from his hair. His zanpaku-tô was coated in dust and grit that had stuck to the still-wet blood upon it.

_Hinamori—_

_The rocks! Will I be able to get her out?_

_FOCUS!_

He stood before me now. I crouched, prepared to spring –

--but suddenly he was gone, and my entire left side burned with agony.

I had to gasp for air; each breath sent more pain lancing through me.

_What the hell was that?_

_Not a shun-po — he was there – now he's behind me; I can tell – I couldn't even see –_

I gripped Hyôrinmaru tighter and prepared myself to continue, but then my wings began to crack and shatter, and I knew it was over.

_I_ was over.

"No…way…" I whispered.

I couldn't fall now. Not this easily.

_Just turn around, and strike –_

But it took all my strength just to stand.

Blocks of ice hit the floor, my power crumbling before my very eyes. What strength I had left was drained and, all at once, I collapsed.

_No! No!_

I struggled to get back up, but my body would not obey.

_Come on! Focus! Get up!_

I saw myself reflected back in the thousands of ice boulders and shards. Blood dribbled from the corners of my mouth, and my slashed captain's robe was stained scarlet. I lay in a growing pool of crimson, and as I looked into my own eyes – wide with shock – it truly hit me then.

_Everything you see here is real, Hitsugaya-kun._

_Everything._

I, Hitsugaya Tôshirô, captain of the tenth company, was dying.

_And I never even knew what hit me…_

_Hinamori…_

_Momo, I'm…sorry._

A strange prickling sensation stung the corners of my eyes. My sight blurred, and I felt something cold running down my face.

_Melting ice? _

_Or am I…crying…?_

My vision swam once more, and then I neither saw nor felt anything at all.

_Matsumoto Rangiku_

Over.

For now, everything was over.

Aizen was gone – escaped to another dimension – with the powerful Hogyoku in his grasp. Captain Tôsen – another of Aizen's secret subordinates – had gone with him. And—

_Ichimaru…_

With a sigh, I batted away that thought. It was more important to be thinking about the future. Aizen now had the power to create shinigami-Hollow hybrids. These creatures would certainly have abilities beyond our reckoning, and would surely be stronger than any captain.

And, without a doubt, Aizen would bring them back here for the war that would decide where all the power truly lay.

I couldn't believe that, thanks to the gigai she had used while in the human world, that Rukia had had the Hogyoku embedded in her soul the entire time. Even _she _hadn't known.

_How did Aizen find out?_

I shook my head again. That did not matter. He knew, and he was determined to kill Rukia to get it – her, and anyone else who stood in his way.

_Like Tôshirô…_

I couldn't believe it when I'd received the message that my captain had actually – lost. And my heart had nearly stopped when the healers from the forth company and brought him in. It appeared as though all the blood had been drained from him, leaving his skin nearly as white as his hair, and splashed it all over him; his left side in particular – the side closest to the heart. But his eyes were the worst. When I saw them, half-open and glazed over, I was certain he was dead.

Momo was even worse – but, then, she'd had no idea of what was happening until it was too late. Tôshirô had gone into battle fully aware and prepared, and yet he had still suffered mortal wounds, and his zanpaku-tô was stained with no blood but his own.

And I waited now, wondering if I would ever see either one of them alive again.

There were healers working around the clock. Not only had Momo and Tôshirô been badly hurt, Captain Kuchiki had suffered a serious side wound from defending Rukia from Gin's blade, and Renji had nearly lost his arm fighting Aizen.

Not to mention that the leader of the Ryoka, Kurosaki Ichigo, had almost had his spine severed by that filthy traitor.

_And this is the human who defeated Ikkaku, Renji, Kenpachi, and Byakuya! Yet he too was felled immediately at Aizen's hand. _Only the quick actions and amazing powers of his redheaded female companion, Inoue Orihime, had saved him from certain death.

_This can't be a coincidence. Aizen must have secret power that allows him to – to – well, what is it that he does? No one can figure it out…_

The doors of the infirmary opened, and out walked Captain Unohana. Dried blood formed rust-coloured stains on her robe and matted her braid, and she looked exhausted. I immediately stood up and blurted out my words before they deserted me.

"How is – are – Momo and – Tôshirô?"

Captain Unohana bowed her head.

"They are still with us," she murmured, and the rush of relief made me light-headed. She must have seen me smiling, for she looked up at me sternly. "However, they are just barely hanging on." I immediately sobered.

She sighed. "I've done all I can for them. The rest is up to them." She gave one of her faint smiles that did not reach her gentle, mourning eyes. "The good news is that Abarai-kun will live, and that Captain Kuchiki's chances of survival are improving by the hour."

The news was not great, but it could have been worse – so much worse.

"Thank you so much, Captain Unohana."

She fixed me with another gaze. "Don't thank me yet, Matsumoto-san."


	3. Chapter 3: I Promise You

Chapter Three – I Promise You

_Matsumoto Rangiku_

Within a few days, Tôshirô was stable, and it was determined that he would live. He was moved to a separate ward where he could recover properly.

When I was told the news, I wanted to go to him right away. But the messenger, Hanatarô, sheepishly informed me I was not allowed.

"I'm very sorry, Matsumoto-san," he said. "Any other time we would – but he doesn't want to see anyone, and the patient's wishes must be honoured."

I wasn't altogether surprised. Tôshirô was never social, and it seemed understandable that he would be decidedly less so after nearly being killed. But I still wanted to go to him, comfort him. It was like being compelled by a motherly urge –

--well, maybe not motherly.

More like big sister-ly.

Either way, though, I would rather be by his side right now, instead of leaving him alone.

_Hitsugaya Tôshirô _

There was noting more I wanted than to be alone.

For most of the time, I got my wish. Kuchiki had recovered and left the infirmary, and Abarai had been out for days. But there was always one healer or another, coming in every so often to "check on me".

As if I were going anywhere.

It was infuriating, being treated like a helpless child. Like I was so delicate that I would die at any given second. I wasn't even allowed to stand up without help.

The sooner I got the hell out of here, the better. Once I was healed, everything would be well again.

I sighed.

_Who am I kidding?_

When I'd regained consciousness, a couple of days ago, the first thing I'd seen was Hinamori, though she'd been partially obscured by the healer who was working on her. She'd been changed into the formless white infirmary robes, but they were still stained red, for the bleeding had taken a long time to cease. There was dust in her hair and her face was covered in scratches and bruises.

_The rockfall,_ I'd realized with a wave of guilt.

That was all there'd been time for before the healer saw I was awake and ran for Unohana, who immediately moved me to the recovery ward.

Of course, I had been relieved that Momo was alive, and I imagine that it would have taken all of Unohana-san's strength to save her. However, I was far from content.

First of all, I knew that she was still unconscious. The medics wouldn't tell me directly, but it was surprising what they spoke about when they thought I was asleep.

But, more importantly – what will I do when she does wake up? For Aizen had done much more than stab her through the heart – he had shattered her soul. Her loving, trusting, loyal soul. She had adored him, and he had lied to her and used her and –

My heart rate was speeding up with anger, burning the half-healed slashes across my ribs.

_Shit._

I struggled to calm my agitated system. Giving myself over to sleep would be the easiest way out, but I wouldn't give my body that satisfaction. I had to heal. I would fight the pain, the exhaustion. I would fight my way to recovery.

And then I would fight for Hinamori.

_Matsumoto Rangiku_

Since I could see neither Tôshirô nor Momo – for she was still in an unstable condition – I asked Captain Unohana for updates whenever I saw her. I felt guilty for pestering her, but she seemed to understand.

"Hitsugaya-taichô is making an amazingly swift recovery. I've rarely seen anything like it. One would never think that his life was hanging on by a thread only a few days ago."

I couldn't contain a smile. "That's Tôshirô for you. He's always been the 'refuse-to-lose' type."

Unohana-san smiled as well, for a fleeting moment, but then it quickly faded. "Then, as if by contrast, Hinamori-san…" she sighed. "I just can't explain it. One day she's improving, the next she's back to where she started. And through it all, she's never once opened her eyes. Although, as of late, I've been wondering…if it's better that she doesn't wake up."

Surprise and confusion flitted across my face for only a second, but the fourth captain's keen eyes caught it.

"I don't mean to say that we should – stop caring for her. I've only been thinking about her psychological state when she does wake up."

I understood now. "I've been wondering the same thing."

"Hinamori-san has always been an emotional girl, for as long as I've known her, at least. And her heart has taken an enormous injury – in the emotional sense, I mean, though it was not easy to repair that hole that Sôsuke—" she shook her head as she said his name, and her voice took on a bitter note. "What I mean to say is, it's like he left two wounds. One, I have healed to the best of my ability. The other one – she will have to repair on her own."

"Do you think—she can?"

"I cannot say. She is such a fragile soul. I believe it will be kinder for her to sleep as long as possible."

There was a sombre silence.

"But you are fortunate, Matsumoto-san. I believe we can expect Hitsugaya-taichô back on his feet in about a week."

_Kira Izuru_

I paced around the floor of my cell. Since Aizen's escape, I had been locked in here. Because Gin was my captain, no one knew of I could be trusted.

I was well aware of my many mistakes. Like any lieutenant, all I'd really wanted was my captain's respect. Only now do I realize that I was willing to go too far to get it.

I hadn't known about Aizen. When Ichimaru-taichô had ordered me to go to the Central 46 Chamber and keep Captain Hitsugaya and Lieutenant Matsumoto "occupied", I did not question, for I had learned years ago not to. But as I was leaving, I overheard him talking to someone – I know now it was Aizen – about Hinamori.

I had tried to ignore it, but once I had gone to the Chamber and allowed Captain Hitsugaya and Matsumoto-san to chase me, it wouldn't go away. I didn't want to disobey orders, but Hinamori had been my friend for a long time, and if she was going to be in danger, I couldn't let it happen.

So I'd 'let it slip' to the captain the Hinamori had escaped her cell.

After Hitsugaya-taichô had left, Matsumoto-san and I had crossed blades. Thanks to Wabisuke's power of doubling the weight of whatever it hits, the tenth assistant-captain was soon fighting with a zanpaku-tô that weighed over 200 pounds. Though she had been far from giving up, I could have easily killed her at that point.

Then I thought, _But why should I?_

Then the message came through. The telepathic message sent by assistant-captain Kotetsu to everyone at once.

And thus, I learned the truth.

Matsumoto-san was running back the moment she'd heard her captain had lost his fight and was likely dead. I'd called Wabisuke back into its sealed from, and Matsumoto-san's zanpaku-tô then returned to its normal weight. Her speed had increased exponentially, but she did not look back.

I stood there, wondering what to do next.

Before I could decide, the secret militia of the second company had found me, and I was promptly arrested.

And then I'd heard that it had been too late for Hinamori anyway, and that she lay in the infirmary, clinging onto life, and that had been even worse.

I turned around now to see my cell door hanging open, and Captain Utitake standing in the empty space.

I bowed my head respectfully. "Utitake-taichô."

"In absence of a council," he said, "the remaining captains have voted. We have deemed you trustworthy, Kira-fuku-taichô. You are free to go."

I suddenly felt lighter. I hadn't realized I'd been worrying, but I now felt pronounced relief.

"Thank you." I walked from the cell.

"Kira—" Captain Utitake's expression was soft. "I'm sorry for – your loss."

I bowed again. "Thank you, sir."

_Matsumoto Rangiku_

His name had been lingering at the edge of my thoughts for days now. Until now, I had been able to occupy my mind with other things. However, I had not seen Captain Unohana all day, and so I did not know how Tôshirô and Momo were doing. My mind then was open to any thought, and this one managed to slip his way in.

Sighing, I let the name sound in my head.

_Ichimaru Gin..._

_Once a friend of mine, and now, a brutal enemy of me, and all the Soul Society._

_Or…is he?_

For our final encounter had left my head spinning…

I'd been running to Tôshirô, but then I'd encountered Aizen, Ichimaru, and Tôsen – another of his secret subordinates – along with most of the Gotei 13 Companies, who had been able to track them down thanks to Isane's message. Immediately, I'd lunged for Ichimaru, grasping one of his arms in one of my hands and holding Haineko to his throat with the other. Yoruichi and Soi Fong went for Aizen, and everyone else surrounded the three traitors.

But, we were too late; Aizen had had a backup plan. At his command, three squares of light surrounded each of them. Soi Fong, Yoruichi and I were forced to let go immediately, or else be dragged across time and space to a different dimension.

I'd stared at Ichimaru with a look of loathing.

"It's really too bad my capture couldn't have lasted a little longer," he'd said, and then he'd met my eyes and, for a moment, that creepy, disgusting smile of his faltered for the first time that I'd seen in a long while. "Sorry."

I maintained my glare, but my thoughts were confused.

For an even shorter instant, his smile became genuine and benign. "Farewell…Rangiku."

And then he was gone.

The memory brought a lonely aching to my heart. _That's what I've always hated most about you…_

_…Gin._

"Idiot," I muttered, shaking my head.

"Who's an idiot?" came a familiar voice from behind me.

"Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii!!!" I leapt up about three feet in the air. "Tôshirô! You scared me so much my boobs almost fell off!"

I looked around in time to see him roll his brilliant blue-green eyes. "As if that's even possible."

"W-what are you doing here?" I asked, recovered from the surprise. "Unohana-taichô said you'd be about another week, but that was only two days ago!"

"Are you really that surprised?" he demanded. I was shocked all over again by the hostility in his tone. "Have I not spent my entire life defying the expectations of others? I am _not _some pathetic, helpless child who would just lie down and wait for things to improve after taking a minor hit. Do you really think that I would be a captain if _that_ were my mindset? _Do you?!_"

For a moment, I was speechless. I could tell there was something more that was bothering him, and, once again, I was confronted by the desire to take him and hold him close. But I knew I would be rejected immediately. He wouldn't physically shove me away—he would be tactful about it.

Well, as tactful as he ever got, anyway.

But, either way, there was nothing I could do when he insisted on isolating himself like this.

I finally managed, "I-I'm sorry, Captain."

He sighed, and the fight left him. "I know," he replied quietly.

There was a short silence after that, broken by a new voice.

"Matsumoto-san?"

Both Tôshirô and I turned to see Izuru standing in the doorway, his head hanging down. Right away, I noticed the lack of his lieutenant's badge. Either he'd been demoted, or – he'd refused to wear it.

"Matsumoto-san, I – I – I'm sorry," he said finally.

I had been angry with him, but now I relented. Really, all he'd been doing was following the orders of his captain. I would have done the same for mine.

"Raise your head, Izuru-kun," I said, jokingly using the release command for his zanpaku-tô. "Would you be interested in joining me for a drink?"

"Ah—all right. Thank you."

"You don't mind, do you Tôshirô?" I pleaded.

"Why ask me?" he said sarcastically, rolling his eyes again. "I'm underage."

_Hitsugaya Tôshirô_

"A drink", I quickly learned, was a relative term.

Of course, I stayed with Matsumoto. Though highly I doubted that Kira would try anything now, I couldn't afford to take chances. Besides, someone had to be the responsible one.

As the two became increasingly drunk, they started to ignore me. This was just as well, as I really needed to think and get my mind in order, for it was all in a turmoil; a maelstrom revolving around thoughts of H—

Without warning, Matsumoto cried, "Gin is a pig-head!" She tried to stamp her foot to emphasize this point, but she swayed off-balance and had to quickly replace her foot on the ground.

"Yeah! A pig-head!" echoed Kira.

"And what's with those weird eyes, anyway?!" Matsumoto went on, in a voice loud enough for half the Soul Society to hear. "Good riddance! I could care less if he dies!"

"Yeah! Yeah!"

It might have been comical if not for the present circumstances. That, or pathetic. But they wouldn't be the only ones trying to take their minds off of things…

Right then, two people ran past; I recognized them as the leader of the Ryoka, Kurosaki, and one of his companions, Inoue. Matsumoto called to them to join them, but Inoue shook her head and they kept running. Later, I would find out that Kurosaki, in a fit of boredom, had gone around challenging anyone he saw to a duel. Unfortunately, the one to take him up on his offer was Kenpachi. Seeing as Kurosaki had almost died during their last battle, he'd decided to give this one a pass.

_Cocky idiot._

Yet, there was strength and potential present, and the same went for Inoue. With proper training for both of them…who knows?

I did know one thing; with circumstances being the way they were right now, we would be meeting again, and more likely sooner than later.

My thoughts then turned back to the one who never got to meet them in the first place.

I looked over at Matsumoto and Kira again. Kira had consumed nearly as much sake as Matsumoto, and I would have been surprised if he was even capable of drawing his zanpaku-tô, much less using it. The only danger Matsumoto was in was passing out.

As casually as I could, I walked towards the door, but I had only one foot out when Matsumoto slurred, "Hey, Tôsh'rô, where 'r' you goin'?"

I didn't risk glancing over my shoulder, lest my face betray me. Surprising myself with how nonchalant I sounded, I replied, "Bathroom."

"'Kay." She giggled. "Have fuuuu-uuuuun."

As I left, I sighed, shaking my head. In her state, I could have told her that I was going to throw myself from the top of a cliff, and that would have elicited the same response.

I didn't mind, though.

In a way, I envied her.

_Matsumoto Rangiku_

I knew exactly where Tôshirô was going. I wasn't so drunk that he could fool me.

_Not yet, anyway…_

_Hitsugaya Tôshirô_

Again, I had underestimated my reaction. I had had myself braced for something awful, but when I looked in the doorway, I still felt as though I'd had a ton of bricks dropped on my shoulders.

From about a mile and a half up.

I still felt that I should go in. A minute couldn't hurt.

Or, could it?

A minute was all it had taken to make her like this…

Checking one more time to make sure no one was around, I stepped into the room. Each step I took brought her face into clearer detail; each of those steps was like a punch in the stomach.

_Hinamori…_

Seeing her like this…it physically hurt me. And yet, I couldn't take my eyes off her prone form lying in the bed; her midnight hair splayed limply over the pillow; those long black lashes dusting gaunt cheekbones; the oxygen mask that covered the lower half of her face, the artificial rise and fall of her chest the only movement.

Part of me wanted to blame Kira for what had happened, but it wouldn't be rational. Between Aizen and Ichimaru, they would have found another way to do this.

Besides, a larger part of me blamed myself.

For my carelessness, for my gullibility, for my…guardian's instinct.

_If I hadn't tried so hard to protect her…she wouldn't be here now._

Without thinking, I knelt down beside the cot and took her hand.

It was so cold, and I could feel every bone beneath the fragile layer of skin, but I held on tightly with both of my own hands, willing life and strength through me, back into her.

_I'm here, Momo. And I'm going to help you. _

_I promise you._

_But…I can't – I can't do it alone. Please…_

_…please, wake up._

The hairs on the back of my neck suddenly stood up. Someone had been watching me; for how long, I didn't know. Fighting back the burning sensation creeping up my face, I carefully released Hinamori's hand, then stood and turned.

-_Abarai Renji_

I was tired of all the vague updates I'd been receiving from the healers, and so I had decided to go and visit Hinamori myself.

I didn't encounter anyone on my way through the infirmary, but when I got to Hinamori's room, it appeared that someone had had the same idea; someone was kneeling at the side of the bed. Spiky white hair and the 'juu' kanji on the back of his robes identified him as Hitsugaya-taichô. I was extremely surprised to see him holding Hinamori's hand.

But, should I have been? After all, the kid was full of surprises. He held the record for graduating the training Academy faster than anyone ever had before, and he had quickly ascended through the ranks after that to become a captain.

I have to admit, when I first heard about him from Hinamori, I had had different expectations, namely due to the age issue. Hinamori was slightly older than Hitsugaya, and I had thought that they would act the same way. Even though Hinamori was an extremely skilled fighter, and very mature in spite of her youth, it was hard to forget that she was little more than a child.

But Hitsugaya – when I'd met him, I'd had to take my expectations and turn them into pretty much the opposite ideas. Already, the reitsu coming off of him was equal to that of the highest-ranking captain's of the Gotei thirteen, and I'd never met anyone so scarily stoic. I'd seen him have his back laid open by some idiot in a training exercise. Most of us thought he'd lose the use of his legs, but he was only in the infirmary for three hours before returning and starting back into training activities without so much as a frown of discomfort. Really, the only thing that I knew that would provoke a reaction from him was judging or discriminating against him based on his age.

Well, that, and – Hinamori.

Even when I became a lieutenant, and I could hardly spend any time with Hinamori anymore, I'd noticed how protective Hitsugaya had seemed of her. I knew they were childhood friends, and he tended to be irritated by her easily, only to brush her off later. The way he'd reacted when she'd gone after Gin, though – wow. I'd never seen anything like it.

Until now. It wasn't the same, not really. But, then again, maybe it was the same thing, showing itself in a different way.

He seemed to realize someone else was there, then. He dropped Hinamori's hand and stood up, turning to face me. Was I imagining it, or did his face look a little red?

He relaxed a little when he saw it was me. "Oh, Abarai."

"Hitsugaya-taichô," I replied.

"I was just checking her for a pulse," he said, gesturing to Hinamori. "It's still a little inconsistent, but that's to be expected at this stage." He was talking a little too quickly, and I definitely wasn't imagining the red.

"Right, right." I wasn't going to press him. These were not ideal circumstances.

Then I looked at him again. There was something different there, something off. I had never thought of Hitsugaya-taichô as vulnerable, but now –

-- no, he didn't look vulnerable, exactly. But there was something –

-- I figured it out.

"What are you staring at?" he demanded.

"Well," I said, uncomfortable, "it's just that—uh, well—for a minute there…you actually looked your age, Captain."

His eyes widened for an instant, then he regained his composure. "I see," he replied gravely. Then, "I really ought to go. It's good to see you well, Abarai."

"Oh – yeah, you, too," I replied, but he was already gone.

----

A/N: Thank you thank you thank you!!!! to kirei hana35 and Ayame666 for adding this story to their favs! And thank you, Justine for reading and reviewing, even if you have _no_ idea what I'm talking about xb I'm trying to maintain my other stories, so it will be a while before I update…but there will be a chapter 4, eventually! I will never abandon the HitsuHina legacy! Never!!!!!!!!!


	4. Chapter 4: Without A Moment's Peace

Chapter 4 – Without a Moment's Peace

A/N: I'm so sorry, I know it's taken forever to update! The chapters on this are so long, though, and I'm trying to maintain 3 other stories … kind of stupid of me, but oh well! Check my profile for a schedule on what will be updated each week.

Just to warn you guys, not all the stuff in this chapter, or chapter five, is 100% relevant to the story. It was just fun to write There's some lighter-hearted moments, just in time for it to get dark and depressing (mwa-ha-ha) for chapter six, when we return to Momo's POV. (yay!)

Enjoy it anyway! I think you'll laugh a few times…we'll see.

And please review! I want to be a real author in a few years…your criticism will be extremely helpful

_--Abarai Renji_

Even after Hitsugaya-taichô had left, I stayed behind with Hinamori. There wasn't anything to do, and since I was trying not to be found by the healers, there was nothing to say, either. Even though there was a lot that needed to be said.

During our years in training together, we'd become excellent friends. The three of us, actually: Hinamori, Kira, and me. But after graduation, we'd moved to different companies and drifted apart. And things didn't improve after all three of us became lieutenants. I regretted this – it was not a fault, simply an advance in our lives, but that didn't make losing the friendship we'd had any easier.

And now, Hinamori had almost been lost to everyone—forever.

Even still, she would probably never be the same…

And it was because of Aizen. All of it. Even the fact that we'd been separated was his fault. He'd chosen Hinamori for himself and Kira for Ichimaru, then shipped me off to the eleventh division because I'd been too "problematic" and "rebellious". But, now, so much in my life had been damaged. Not only had Hinamori been hurt, there was the near-loss of my own left arm, and my captain had been severely wounded as well. He'd lived, and I had mostly healed, but there was still a vivid red gash across my shoulder, and I knew that it would be a while before I recovered my full combat abilities.

The only thing that had escaped harm was…

…Rukia.

But, as I thought, I realized how close she had come to ending up lying in the bed opposite Hinamori. In fact, it had been Byakuya-taichô who had saved her.

The irony had escaped me at the time…forgive me, I was unconscious. But seeing as he had been prepared to kill me not long before in order to prevent me from rescuing Rukia – his adopted sister, for god's sake – from her execution. Actually, he almost had killed me…but I was determined to live, and I recovered quickly. Our fight was a mistake that would never be duplicated, that much was ascertained when I went to see him after we both got out of the infirmary.

Imagine, if you will. You're trying to talk to your superior officer, who, an all-too-short time ago, would rather see you dead than have to person you were trying to save, be saved. And yet, this same person, he later almost got himself killed for.

For both involved—it doesn't get much more awkward.

Of course, right when the apologizing part came along, that Kurosaki had to barge in and ruin everything. I guess it was kind of fitting in a way, seeing as the two of us were the only ones who had ever taken Byakuya-taichô's bankai full-blast, head-on, and lived to tell about it.

Later, I would marvel at how anyone with so much raw strength could be so – _stupid._

Seriously, the guy thought he was invincible. Then he fought Aizen, and fell before I did. He's gonna get himself killed with that kind if attitude. Then, if he hasn't already…

I didn't know. I was among the majority in that there wasn't a lot I knew right now.

I looked over at Hinamori again.

_Fuck you, Aizen. I am gonna fucking kill you._

Then I thought about Hitsugaya-taichô again. And I realized that, if he had any say, he would likely beat me to it.

--_Hitsugaya Tôshirô_

"A new assignment? Already?"

"It's been three weeks, Tôshirô," Matsumoto reminded me. "Closer to a month, actually. You shouldn't really be surprised that –"

"I'm _not_ surprised. It's just that –" despite myself, I faltered.

Matsumoto all but read my thoughts. "You thought Hinamori would be better by now."

There was no point in denying it. I nodded. "Or at least that she would have woken up."

We were silent for a minute.

"You don't have to go," said Matsumoto. "Yamamoto-soutaichô _did _request you, but you can still decline. I just thought it would be good for you to get out and away, and find something else to focus on. But, if it's too hard for you to leave, then I'm sure –"

"I'll go," I replied hastily. The very last thing I wanted was coddling or pity.

Matsumoto's demeanour changed so quickly, it was somewhat alarming.

"Great!" she cried. "It will be great; I promise, you won't regret this, Tôshirô! And you'll look soooooo cuuuute as a sixth-grader!"

I stiffened. "What?"

-------

What the hell was the point of this tie?

Other than a clever method for one with suicidal tendencies to use for strangling themselves, it seemed to have no apparent use.

I had just managed to tug the noose-like abomination into the least ridiculous-looking position when Matsumoto flounced in twirling around in her little pleated skirt.

She took one look at me and went, _"Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww!"_

My face burned, and I looked down at the floor. "Can't you at least button your shirt all the way up?" I snapped. "You're going to attract too much attention."

"I think a white-haired sixth-grader will attract more attention," Matsumoto pointed out. "Oh! I know! We can get you a hat! A cute little pageboy hat! Gray to match your pants...or maybe red, to go with the tie!"

"That won't be necessary," I replied cuttingly. "Let's go. The others are waiting."

Of course, we ended up having to traipse around the entire school before we met up with the others by the disclosed classroom. Much to my disappointment, I found myself becoming short of breath.

_These gigai certainly have their limits._

The instant I saw the rest of our group, I had to stifle a groan.

Madarame had insisted upon carrying his zanpaku-tô, and it didn't exactly fit with the guise of a high-schooler. His bald head wasn't much better.

Ayasegawa was blade-less, but the brightly coloured plumes he wore on the corner of his eye weren't what one would call inconspicuous.

And Abarai--his red dreadlocks were like a small bonfire on top of his head, and his black tattooed eyebrows were still visible from beneath his headband.

And where was --?

"It took ya long enough," complained Madarame. "We thought we might have had to go in without ya."

"If I had been here, you certainly wouldn't be going into a classroom full of unsuspecting humans looking like you do," I retorted.

"Says the white-haired sixth-grader. You don't exactly radiate 'normal'," replied Abarai, and he and Madarame snickered.

_And tattoos from your eyebrows to your hairline is…pardon me, what, exactly?_

Perhaps it was for the better that I was interrupted before I could deliver this sentiment. However, it was somewhat unnerving to have your words lost in the sound of an explosion.

It wasn't huge, by any standards, but it sent a choking cloud of smoke down the hall, and, seconds after, a dark-haired woman, presumably the sensei, burst out of the classroom towards the source.

Madarame, and Abarai high-fived one another, while Ayasegawa doubled up with silent laughter.

_What the hell did they---? _

_Forget it. I would rather not know._

"All right; let's go," I ordered, starting towards the room. Matsumoto was only a half-step behind me, and the other three brought up the rear.

--_Kurosaki Ichigo_

School. Home. Humans. Life in general. It all seemed so – normal.

Compared to what I'd recently been through, being back in Karakura was almost surreal. I couldn't believe it.

Thanks to Kon, no one had even noticed that I had been gone all summer. And now, here I was, back in school. I mean, _school. _From risking your life too many times to count, to this? You've gotta be kidding.

I'd been kinda zoning out when the sensei left the room suddenly. I sort of came to when I heard the buzz of chatter that started to instant the sensei's back heel had crossed through the doorway.

My, god, they were talking about the same stupid crap as always…who was going out with who, someone wasn't speaking to so-and-so anymore, and the latest retarded T.V. show that had become popular.

Give me a break! If these people only had the smallest idea of what really went on in this town, this trivial bullshit wouldn't even be _thought _about.

Predictably, Keigo and Mizuiro came over to talk with me. Also predictably, Keigo starts in about some "hot babe" he'd seen yesterday afternoon.

"…And, dude, I was in _heaven! _I mean, we're talking a rack bigger than Orihime's—" his eyes widened as he stared at something behind me.

"What's up?" asked Mizuiro, looking over as well.

"Dude, holy shit!" breathed Keigo. "It's her! She's here! But who are those other losers with her?"

"What are you talking about?" I demanded, turning around in my chair.

I think my jaw fell open for a second, but then I clenched it so tightly, it hurt.

_What. _

_The. _

_Fuck._

_ Are. _

_THEY._

_ Doing. _

_HERE?!?!?!?!?!?!_

_--Hitsugaya T__ôshirô_

We walked into Kurosaki's classroom, and the entire group was talking amongst themselves.

_Excellent. We'll get Kurosaki, then get the hell out of here._

I could see him right away, talking to two other guys: one tall and gangly with shaggy brown waves, and the other shorter, with a slighter build and neat black hair.

Suddenly, the gangly guy looked up. "Dude, holy shit!" he said to the other two. "It's her! She's here! But who are those other losers with her?"

Kurosaki turned around to see, and he glared at us, trying to make frantic motions to tell us to leave.

_What, does he think we're here for our own amusement?_

"Just ignore them all, Keigo," said Kurosaki to the gangly kid. "They're nothing but trouble."

"Ichigo—you know them? You know my babe?" he grinned. "You'll have to introduce me."

"I don't know 'em," Kurosaki amended. "I just know _about _'em. So don't—"

"Then I just have to introduce myself!" he cried, and he started running for Matsumoto.

"Keigo, you shouldn't—" started the black-haired kid.

"Asano, you dumbass!" Kurosaki shouted.

I didn't make a move. I knew I wouldn't have to.

With deadly accuracy, Matsumoto's fist shot out, pulverizing the face of that lecherous idiot, who slid to the floor, unconscious.

Unfortunately, that one move had drawn the attention of everyone in the room. The dull roar petered out, and thirty pairs of eyes regarded us with curiosity.

_Not good._

A ferocious hissing of whispers surrounded us.

"Who are they?"

"Have _you_ ever seen them before?"

"Look at that guy! He's got a wooden sword!"

"Have you seen the tattoos on that one?"

"Why does that guy have feathers on his face! Ha! Loser!"

"I don't blame Asano for jumping that chick—"

"Hey, look at the little kid! He's got silver hair!"

"It looks like a bunch of snow fell on his head and froze there!"

"Ha ha!"

_What is it with everyone and comments on my hair?!_

_"Shiro-chan!...Shiro-chan!"_

The unbidden memory was so sharp that tears abruptly sprang to my eyes.

_What the fuck?! Get a grip!_

Blinking furiously, I saved myself from the indignity of crying.

"Hey…moron. Over here."

The new voice broke through everything, rendering the room silent once more.

_Finally. It's about time she got here._

Kurosaki turned around. "Rukia?"

Kuchiki stood on the windowsill, dressed in a uniform identical to Matsumoto's, although with all the buttons done up as they should be. She smiled. "Hey, Ichigo."

I looked at her, pointedly, and she was all business. "Ikkaku, Renji, hold him."

"Wha--?" cried Kurosaki as Madarame and Abarai each grabbed hold of one of his arms. Kuchiki lunged forward and struck Kurosaki full in the face. Thanks to her glove, he burst out of his body into shinigami form, but there were only four other people in the room who could see this…Inoue, Sado Yasutora, the Quincy, and another girl with spiky black hair, who Inoue was trying to keep distracted…for the last of these four had enough reiatsu only to see us, not to become one of us.

To everyone else in the room, it appeared that Kurosaki slumped, unconscious, and that Kuchiki ran off and jumped out the window, alone. In reality, she was dragging a protesting Kurosaki along with her. Everyone ran over to the window, hoping to see more, but I knew she would have already been gone at that point.

"Let's go," I commanded in a whisper, and, seconds later, it was as though we were never there.

--_Kurosaki Ichigo_

Rukia pulled me back through my window, and I flopped down onto my bed. Gasping a little for breath, I glared up at her. "What – the hell – was _that_?"

"I already explained it to you," Rukia snapped.

"I wasn't really listening--"

"You should have been! This is important!"

"Yeah, well maybe I was a little too busy trying not to _die_!"

"Fine. What you just fought was no ordinary Hollow."

"No shit!"

"Will you shut up? You wanted me to explain; I'm explaining. So. That was an example of what Aizen was using the Hogyoku to create. Since this is an early attempt, we can only assume they are going to keep getting stronger."

"So what? That one was easy enough to beat." _Even if I did get a little banged up…no big deal._

"You're not listening! I said 'early attempt'. As in, 'test case'. Aizen is only going to use what he's learned from this one fighting you to make ones that know how to beat you."

"Why did I have to fight it? Why couldn't you do it?"

"Because you're the only one here who doesn't understand what we're up against."

"So, what are you doing here?"

"We are here to make sure these 'test cases' don't show up and harm anyone in this town. Karakura is a huge centre of reiatsu, the biggest on earth. These Hollows are going to be drawn here more than anywhere else. It's our job to protect the people, and if we can learn a little more about what Aizen is planning, then so much the better."

"And, let me guess: you need me to help."

"This is a job for every shinigami; you don't get to kick back and relax just because you're not part of the Gotei 13."

"You call school 'kicking back and –'"

"Is that who I think it is?" Without warning, my body popped out of nowhere, with Kon in it. "It is!" he cried. "Nee-san, nee-san, you're back!"

"Um, hi, Kon," said Rukia.

He threw his arms around her. "I've missed you so much! The whole summer you were gone I was sooooooooo lonely—"

"Oh, gag me," I groaned. Then I lunged and tackled Kon, choking the soul pellet out of him. Then I put it in his stuffed lion-thing body.

"What was that for?" he demanded.

_God, that thing is fucking annoying. _I picked him up and threw him in a drawer. I could hear him struggling inside, but I didn't care.

_I hope he bursts a seam. Moron._

"So, where are you staying?"

Rukia plopped down on my bed.

"Oh, no. No, no, no."

She grinned. "I'm sure your sisters missed me. And I already know what I'm going to tell your dad."

"Some bullshit sob story about getting evicted from your little ramshackle apartment, and you staying only long enough until you can get some money together to pay the rent, am I right?"

"Close enough."

"Because, you know, it's not like you're freaking _nobility_ or anything. And you sure as hell don't have a _palace _back in the Soul Society. Or anything."

"We're not in the Soul Society, genius! And, besides, it's more of a mansion, anyway."

"Oh, yeah, BIG dif—"

_Clink._

I looked up at the ceiling. "What was that?"

_Ka-chink._

"Oh, no," groaned Rukia to herself. They're actually—"

"What?! What's going on?!"

_Clank._

_Kr-ink._

_CRASH!!!!_

"Aaaaaaaah!!!!" I hollered as the upside-down heads of Renji, Ikkaku, Yumichika, and Rangiku emerged from the hole where my ceiling lamp used to be. "What are _you guys_ doing here now?! I want an explanation! No, wait – I want you to fix my goddamn light first!"

"Urahara-san didn't want all of us staying at his store," explained Rangiku. "It would be too crowded. So, here we are!"

"What? All of you, here? Letting you break more of my stuff? No way! Get out of here!"

"Um—we can't," said Rangiku sheepishly. "Some kid called Ikkaku bald, and so he tried to attack him with his zanpaku-tô. So, it's probably best if we're not seen—"

"But you _are _bald," I said to Ikkaku, exasperated.

He lunged forward and grabbed a fistful of my hair. "Care to join the club, Strawberry?"

"Hey! Ow! Watch it, buddy. I've kicked your ass once, I'll do it again."

"Oh yeah? Bring it!"

"Will you shut up?" demanded a new voice. "You people are so immature."

I looked over to see the white-haired kid sitting on my window ledge. "God, I wish this were someone else's job," he muttered to himself. "As you can see, the window was open. It wasn't necessary to destroy the ceiling."

"Yeah, see, Tôshirô knows what he's talking about," I said.

He hit me with a glare so icy that I think I actually felt the temperature of the room go down by about twenty degrees. "That's 'Captain Hitsugaya' to you."

"Okay, okay." _Sheesh._

"How'd you even get up there?" asked Yumichika.

"I jumped," Tôshirô replied simply.

"I hope nobody saw you," said Renji. "I mean, a white-haired sixth-grader is weird enough without being like one of these guys' 'superheroes' or something."

The kid was losing his patience. "You bastards. When we get beck to the Soul Society, I'm going to—"

"Hey, cool it, _Captain,_" I jumped in. "Now, we've gotta figure out what we're gonna do with you people."

I saw Kon, behind me, put the corner of me eye, starting to struggle free of the drawer, His head and shoulders were out, and he was gasping and choking pathetically. I didn't care.

"Why can't we stay?" asked Rangiku. "You're letting Rukia stay."

"Rukia has stayed here before, and my dad knows her already, but he's never even seen you guys before. And Rukia is _one_ person. Not _six._"

"Please?"

"No way!" I said. "Absolutely not!"

"Pretty please?" said Rangiku, lowering her voice to a husky purr, and crouching down to my eye level – actually, to give me a better view down her shirt.

I looked away, my face red. "You know that shit doesn't work on me, Rangiku-_san_," I said, intentionally adding the '-san' so that she would hopefully remember what the real objective was here.

Suddenly, I felt a blur shoot past my head. Without even looking away from me, Rangiku's fist came out to meet it, and it crumpled to the floor without a sound.

It was Kon. I wasn't surprised.

_Guess Kon got K.O.'d._

This distraction provided me with enough time to think of a quick plan. "I'm gonna call Orihime," I announced. "Maybe some of you can stay at her place."

As I walked out to use the phone, I heard Rangiku cry, "If Orihime-chan says no, I call dibs on Ichigo's bed!"

"What? No way!" said Yumichika sulkily. "I want it. I need my beauty sleep."

"I'll fight you for it," replied Rangiku cheerfully.

"NOT IN MY ROOM, YOU WON'T!" I hollered. I punched in the numbers on the telephone furiously. _Dammit, Orihime had better be home…_

A/N: Next chapter preview: Arrancar attack! But even in the midst of battle, Tôshirô can't stop thinking of Momo…don't miss it!

See you there!

~Raye Lynne


	5. Chapter 5: Pyon! Pyon!

**Chapter Five – Pyon! Pyon!**

A/N: Thank you so much for your support on this story, especially to funfanfair, the latest to add this to their favourites! As well, thank you to my reviewers: MyNameIsJustine, Mitsuki Sakura, and narutowolf. I hope you'll continue to enjoy!__

-------------------

_**- Hitsugaya T**__**ôshirô**_

__"Here's your room," said Inoue, gesturing into the living room. Two pastel-coloured sheets had been hung as makeshift curtains, dividing the room into two somewhat equal halves. One had a couch, a lamp, a table and a small television set. The other, the side with the window, encompassed nothing more than a futon and a space heater.

"I'm sorry; it's not much," said Inoue. "I would have given you my bedroom, but it's so small!"

"Don't worry; this is great, Orihime-chan!" declared Matsumoto. I expressed my concurring, if not quite as enthusiastic, sentiments with a simple nod.

"Okay…well, good," said Inoue. "Dinner will be ready in about half an hour; are either of you hungry?"

"Starving!" Matsumoto cried, at the same moment I replied, "No, thank you."

"All right…well, I'll make some for you anyway, in case you change your mind," she said cheerfully, then went off to the kitchen.

As it turned out, Matsumoto were able to stay in Inoue's apartment. However, it was so tiny, that the other three had gone to say with Kurosaki's other friend – Asano, who, as it happened, had a small amount of reiatsu as well. Who would have guessed? It certainly didn't stop him from being a moron.

"Dibs on the couch!" cried Matsumoto, flinging herself amongst the pillows. "Ooooo, comfy!"

"How can you act like that?" I demanded. "We are on a serious mission here, and you – well, Abarai, Madarame, and Ayasegawa, too – but you, especially, are acting so childish! For example: what the hell was that, back at Kurosaki's place?! You made me sick! Why the hell would you try to _seduce_ Kurosaki into letting us stay?!"

"If it had worked, you would be thanking me."

"I doubt it. And, thanks to you, everyone noticed us in the school. Now there'll be questions flying all over town!"

"What was I supposed to do? That kid was charging at me!"

"First of all, don't tell me that you weren't flattered. Secondly, if you had listened to me and buttoned your shirt up in the first place, that wouldn't have happened!"

"You're just jealous," said Matsumoto sweetly.

"Of what? Thank very, _very,_ carefully about that answer."

"Of the older boys and their 'private viewings'," Matsumoto replied smugly.

"Why the fuck would you say that?! You'd better not be serious."

"Am I ever serious?" she preened. "Oh, well…that Keigo kid, at least I'll be the object of his fantasies."

"From what I know about Asano, _his _fantasies are not something you want to be a part of."

"I probably already have been, though," she giggled. "Right after he got home from school today…how much do you bet that he went home…went to his room…locked the door…and--"

"Let's assume, if you will, for a moment, that I am not an idiot, and I know exactly where you are going with your verbal meandering, and therefore, you can cut it off."

Matsumoto burst into laughter. "Tôshirô, that's so dirty!"

"What is your problem?!"

_I _don't_ want to know what she's thinking. _

Lately, she'd been making a lot of jokes at my expense. She'd mentioned one time that she wanted to "get me back to my old self", whatever that meant. If she wanted me highly annoyed and irritated, well, she'd accomplished her goal.

She continued laughing, at this joke that only she understood.

"Forget it," I said. "I'm going to sleep."

"Already?" asked Matsumoto, her giggles petering out.

"Yes…I'm not fully adjusted to this gigai yet…it's wearing me out."

This was half of the truth…but after so much that had happened today, I was wearier mentally rather than physically.

Stepping through the divide in the curtains, I crossed over to my side of the room. The first thing I did was unplug the space heater and push it through to Matsumoto's side. I didn't like extra heat, just a side-effect of being a wielder of an ice zanpaku-tô. I dug through a box of miscellaneous clothing items that we had borrowed from Urahara's store, and found what resembled a pair of pajamas. The colours were garish, but they fit well enough when I put them on.

I lay down on the futon, not even bothering to pull the blankets over me. I closed my eyes, and—

'_Shiro-chan! Shiro-chan!'_

_'Stop it!'_

_Hinamori…_

_**-Matsumoto Rangiku**_

__"Dinner's ready!" I heard Orihime call from the kitchen.

"Yay!" I cried, walking into the room. "It smells great, Orihime-chan!"

"Good," said Orihime. "Will Hitsugaya-taichô be joining us?"

"No…I think he's sleeping."

"Well, I'll save him some in case he's hungry later." She placed a bowl of steaming ramen and vegetables in front of me, and I dug in eagerly.

"This is soooo good, Orihime-chan," I declared, in between bites.

Orihime laughed nervously. "You really think so? Most people take one look at my cooking and claim to lose their appetites."

"I don't care if it's pretty…it tastes great!"

"Well…thanks."

"Don't thank me, I mean it! It's so good of you to have Tôshirôand me over here, and on such short notice, too! You know, the real reason Urahara-san wouldn't let us stay in his shop – I mean, with six of us, it _would _be crowded, but that's not it. It's because, as soon as Rukia-chan saw him, she punched him in the face! I don't think Urahara-san was mad, just scared of getting hit again! Not that I blame Rukia-chan; I would have done the same thing if Urahara'd put the Hogyoku in _my _gigai without telling me! I mean, she was almost killed for it, after all!" I noticed then that Orihime was only picking at her own food.

"You should really eat, Orihime-chan. It's yummy, for starters, and girls of our 'upper-bodily dimensions' can't get too skinny, or we'll look disproportionate!" Orihime managed a small smile, but I knew that something was wrong.

"Are you all right?" I asked, concerned.

"I'm fine," she said, but her voice trembled a little, and she sighed. "No, I'm not, not really."

"What's the matter? You can tell me anything, Orihime-chan; I can keep a secret."

"I know…it's just that – well, I, um, -- the thing is – I'm a little bit jealous…of Kuchiki-san."

"Okay…" I prompted, gently.

"Well – it's Kurosaki-kun. Ever since we got back from the Soul Society, he'd been isolating himself. I mean, he's never really sociable to begin with, but this was something more…he would hardly talk to anyone, not even Sado-kun or Ishida-kun or me. Even when he did talk, it was like he wasn't saying anything…like his thoughts were somewhere else.

"But, when Kuchiki-san came back, he was…happy again. I could see it, in the classroom, the way his eyes lit up. Of course, he didn't smile." She gave a small laugh through her emerging tears. "But, maybe he kind of did…on the inside. I – I've liked Kurosaki-kun for a long time," she confessed. "And I just – I just wish – that –when he needed someone – that I could have been the one to make his heart smile."

With that, she burst into tears.

I thought of Tôshirô then…my good friend and respected captain, yet one who would rather isolate himself than confide in me, leaving me powerless to help him. And I thought of another, so far beyond my reach…

…_Gin…_

I moved to her Orihime's side of the table and put my arms around her, letting her cry on my shoulder.

"Honey," I said. "I know exactly how you feel."

------

One change into fluffy p.j.s, two T.V. movies, and three bowls of ice cream later, Orihime was feeling a little better.

"Thank you so much, Rangiku-san," she said. "You've been such a big help."

"What are friends for?" I replied. 'It's the least I could do for you."

"Well…I'm going to bed now. It's starting to get late, and I'm really tired."

"Me, too… you know, I'm surprised we haven't woken Tôshirô up with the noise of the T.V." Just then, I got an idea, and I had to stuff my fist in my mouth to keep from bursting into laughter.

"What is it?" asked Orihime.

"I have an idea," I replied devilishly. "It's guaranteed to cheer you up."

"Is it one of your funny stories? Like the one with Kuchiki-san?"

"Better. Much better."

------

Orihime laughed nervously. "That _is _funny, Rangiku-san. But I think we can take them out now…"

"Oh, no," I replied. "The funny part is going to be when he wakes up."

_**-Hitsugaya Tôshirô**_

__I was awoken by a repeated application of a dull pressure on my shoulder.

"Tooooooooshiroooooooo, waaaaaake uuuuuup," said Matsumoto, poking me again.

Instantly alert, I sat up. "What is it?"

Much to my annoyance, she and Inoue were only standing there, staring at me and trying not to laugh.

"What's going on?" I repeated. "What's the problem?"

"Nothing," said Matsumoto innocently.

"Then what the hell did you wake me up for?"

"I wasn't sure if you were sleeping or dead, so I –" with that, she cut herself off with a gale of laughter. Inoue was laughing too, though trying to avoid eye contact with me.

"What?!" I demanded.

Matsumoto whipped her arm out; she was holding out a mirror, but before I could look at it, she doubled over and started rolling on the floor, tears pouring down her face.

"_What?!?!?!" _I reached down and picked up the mirror. When I looked at it, I almost dropped it again.

"What the hell is your fucking problem?"

They had put _bows _in my hair. Primarily pink ones. Pink ones, that, incidentally, matched to colour of my burning face.

Grabbing a handful of coloured fabric strips, I pulled.

"_OWWWWW! _You're supposed to tie _ribbons _around _hair, _not the other way around!" This only set off a new burst of laughter from the Matsumoto.

"I had _no _idea you slept so soundly, Tôshirô," she giggled.

Quickly but meticulously, I picked out every last ribbon, running my hand through my hair to make sure I didn't miss any. By this time, Inoue had composed herself, but Matsumoto had yet to rise from the floor.

_In her mind, I had better be 'back to my old self' after _that.

Just then, I stopped cold – I had sensed something.

"I will never forget that face you made," laughed Matsumoto. "That was priceless! Price-_less!"_

"Shut up," I hissed. Matsumoto immediately fell silent. She had recognized the tone of my voice. This was not an irritated exclamation from the annoyed victim of a childish prank – rather, a direct order from her captain.

"What is it?" she whispered.

After a moment of reaching out with my senses, I was able to answer her.

"Unknown reiatsu…six of them. Two are approaching us."

_**-Abarai Renji**_

__The Asano kid's place was ideal…he didn't live with his parents. However, he hadn't mentioned that he lived with his sister, who was all over Ikkaku the moment she saw him.

_Good god, _I'd thought. _That's going to make things a hell of a lot more difficult._

By a stroke of pure luck, Asano's sister had gone out to the store when I detected the reiatsu. Looking around the room, I saw that the others had noticed as well. There were six, scattered around the city. Two were headed right in our direction.

_**-Hitsugaya Tôshirô**_

__I leapt forward and grabbed my discarded school uniform shirt. Digging in the breast pocket, I fond what I was looking for: two gikon. I tossed one of the soul pellets to Matsumoto, and we swallowed them simultaneously, bursting out of our gigai into our shinigami forms.

"They're on the roof," I said. "Let's go."

Matsumoto was already halfway out the door, and I moved after her, when I saw Inoue trying to follow me.

"You stay here," I said. "There's nothing you can do to help."

"I want to come," she said adamantly.

There was no time to argue. "Fine. But stay on the ground, out of the way. Don't come up to the roof unless otherwise instructed."

"But—"

"Leave the fighting to me and Matsumoto. You don't know what you're dealing with when it comes to these things."

"All-all right."

I didn't think it would be encouraging to say that I, too, scarcely knew what I was about to face.

_**-Abarai Renji**_

It was up to me to make the decision as to who would go and fight, and who would stay behind…to keep Asano from seeing too much—he was watching T.V. now, and someone would need to keep him focused on that. I thought, since we didn't know what we were dealing with, it would be best to have as many bankai-wielders in the field as we could.

"Ikkaku," I said, "come on. Ayasegawa…stay here."

Without waiting for a response, I headed out the door, with Ikkaku on my heels. As soon as we were clear of the house, we swallowed our soul pellets, leaving our gigai behind.

Soon, our opponents were in sight, one was right in front of us, the other ony a short ways behind.

"I got this one," said Ikkaku.

I nodded, wished him luck, then ran off to face my own enemy. Ikkaku was a firm believer in luck, but I was of the mindset that, if skill can do nothing for you, than luck would be no help at all.

_**-Hitsugaya Tôshirô**_

__On the roof stood an eight-foot shinigami-Hollow hybrid, fists clenched, waiting. Ten feet above him hovered a more slighter-built one, obviously hoping for a battle in the air. I was only minorly surprised to note that the stronger reiatsu was coming from the airborne hybrid, rather than his burly companion. Only minorly, however. I, of all people, could not be one to judge based upon appearances.

I turned to Matsumoto. "Send out the request for lifting our limits," I ordered.

"Yes, Captain," she said, clutching the small black communicator in her fist.

With that, I turned away and leapt into the air. With that one bound, I was easily at a level with my opponent. Staring him directly in the face, half-covered by a mask, I said, "I am Hitsugaya Tôshirô, captain of the tenth company of the Gotei 13 Companies."

Inclining his head, the hybrid replied in kind. "Yo soy Arrancar Uno Decimo, Shawlong Qu Fong."

_Arrancar… so that's what they call themselves._

His single visible eyes looked me up and down, and he sneered. "Did you say you were a captain…_Niño?"_

His remark was only meant to provoke me, and I would not rise to that feeble attempt.

"Yes, I did," I replied. "And, presently, you are going to discover why."

Drawing Hyôrinmaru from its sheath, I brought it in front of me and intoned, "_Bankai."_

_**-Kurosaki Ichigo**_

__"Rukia!!!!" I hollered "Get back here and get this retarded thing offa me!"

"That is an improper use of the word 'retarded, pyon!" Rukia's soul-candy-animated gigai replied. "And I am _not _retarded, pyon," it added indignantly.

"Well you're annoying as hell, that's for sure! And could you cut it out with the 'pyon pyon' shit?"

"I don't know what you are talking about, pyon."

"Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgh!"

"I am just following Rukia-sama's orders, pyon," it said placidly. "I was told to keep you from running after her, to preserve your strength for more important battles, pyon pyon."

"Yeah, I get that, but if she needs help, then I can't—"

"Are you doubting Rukia-sama's abilities in combat, PYON?!"

"No, but---"

"Pyon!"

"Gaaaaaah! Will you cut that shit out?!"

"I'm just fo-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-llowing orde-e-e-e-rs, pyo-o-o-on, py-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-on," the gigai sang.

"I said cut that shit out! Or, if you'd rather get the hell offa me, like _right now, _that would be fine."

"Pyo-o-o-o-o-n, pyo-o-o-o-o-o-o-n," the gigai sang, completely ignoring me.

"Seriously, I am gonna fucking kill you if you don't shut up and get off me."

"You can't kill me, pyon, because that would hinder Rukia-sama in her mission, pyon! And I can't allow that to happen, pyon! So I'll just have to kill you first! Pyon pyon!"

"What the---? Owwwwwwwwwwwww!!!!" The thing had grabbed my arm and was twisting it, trying to wrench it off, I guess.

"Your-arm-will-go-pyon!" gasped the gigai, straining with effort.

"Owwwww! Fucking stop that, will ya?" It was far from killing me, but it _hurt._

"You must pyooooooooooooon!!!"

"Owwwwwwwwwowowowowowowowowow---hey!!!! Where do you think you're---?!"

"What are you two idiots doing?"

"Rukia-sama, pyon!" squealed the gigai, completely unfazed. "I have restrained the threat to you, pyon, and it is safe to approach, pyon pyon!"

"You can let him go now," said Rukia. "I'm pretty sure I can handle him."

I sat up, gasping and rubbing my shoulder. "So," I said, "Did you beat the Hollow?"

"It wasn't a Hollow; it was a hybrid—an Arrancar, so they call themselves. And do you think I'd be here if I hadn't won?"

"I guess not…" my voice froze in midsentence, and Rukia stiffened as well. There was an incredibly strong reiatsu, coming from directly behind us.

I leapt to my feet and whirled around. The Arrancar was a tall, skinny guy with bluish-white spikes of hair. A layer of bone covered the lower right half of his face, making his intimidating grin seem even more prominent.

Sauntering closer, flicking his eyes back and forth between me and Rukia he asked casually, "Which one of you…is the stronger one?"

"Ichigo," hissed Rukia, "run."

"What?"

"Run!"

"No way!"

"Ichigo, get the hell out of here! Run!" yelled Rukia, drawing her zanpaku-tô.

In a flash, the Arrancar was in front of her, and he lashed out, punching her in the stomach. His fist went in far deeper than it should have been able to, and it came out dripping red. Rukia's eyes were wide with shock and pain.

"Well," laughed the hybrid, "it sure as hell ain't you."

Rukia swayed on the spot. "Run," she managed to gasp again and then she collapsed.

However, I stood my ground, looking the hybrid right in the eyes.

"You." I said, "Are. Fucking. _Dead."_

His grin only widened_. _"Really?" he replied. "'S'at so?"

_**-Matsumoto Rangiku**_

__My opponent was extremely burly, but, to my surprise, that failed to diminish his speed. Thus far, I had been unable to put even a scratch on him.

I lunged forward with a stab, but he blocked me and retaliated with rapid-fire attacks of his own.

_What's taking them so long to process the limit-lifting request? _I thought frantically, dodging and blocking.

An instant later, I saw an opening on his right side, and I swung. In the blink of an eye, his zanpaku-tô was there to stop mine. Suddenly, he changed the direction of his attack. I saw the blade coming out of the corner of my eye, headed straight for my throat. I only had time to duck, so the hilt caught me in the side of the head. Starbursts exploded in front of my eyes, and then everything faded to black.

_**-Hitsugaya Tôshirô**_

___The limit is going to be the death of me!_

Shawlong Qu Fong was proving to be a formidable opponent. I had a slight advantage at this point, for I'd put a gash on his shoulder, but I was in bankai form. Qu Fong had yet to even break into shikai, but he matched me, blow for blow, and I had to be careful…one wrong move, and it would be over.

The edges of my reiatsu prickled. I was picking up on how my comrades were faring. Kuchiki had won her battle, but she was injured now. Kurosaki was fighting, very close to her, but he was losing. Madarame, too, had won, and Abarai was holding his own.

But…

_Matsumoto!_

I risked a glance downwards and saw her lying, motionless, on the ground below, the temple of her gold-coloured hair streaked with blood.

For a horrible instant, I saw Hinamori lying there instead – but then I blinked, and it was Matsumoto again. She wasn't dead, nor in any immediate danger of dying, but her opponent was standing over her, apparently waiting for her to get up to fight again.

_Will Hinamori ever be able to get up again…?_

_Focus! Focus!_

_This has to end…now!_

In a fit of desperation, I lunged at Qu Fong, slashing at him with my wings, tail, and zanpaku-tô. He easily evaded this, and started to chuckle.

"Is that really all you've got left?" he said. "How pathetic." He glanced up behind me, and his expression changed.

"Tell me something," he said. "Am I correct in the assumption that those flowers behind you represent a countdown for how long you have left in bankai form?"

_Yes. _"What difference does it make?" I responded.

"Ah, so I am right. There used to be twelve petals…now there are but three." He appeared bored, all of a sudden. Then he continued, "I could keep fighting you like this, and wait until you fall from the sky, then destroy you at my leisure. But where is the sport in that?" He brought his zanpaku-tô out in front of him.

"This is how we arrancar," he said, "release our zanpaku-tô."

Staring directly at me, he commanded, "Snip him, Tijierta."

I had to hold back a gasp. His hands—they were changing. His fingers were getting longer, and they shone with a metallic gleam—seconds later, his blade had vanished, but it now seemed as though he now had five long, deadly knives attached to each hand.

I recoiled, but not quickly enough. He lunged, and there was a stinging pain as the tips bit into my skin, dragging thin lines across my face and the length of my entire body.

_What is this?!_

If I hadn't backpedaled in time, I would have likely been slashed to ribbons.

_The limit…!_

The third-to-last of the petals of my Daiguren flowers shattered.

_**-Matsumoto Rangiku**_

__I was awoken by something vibrating in my hand.

_The communitcator!_

"Matsumoto-fukutaichô," came a voice from it, so quiet that only I could hear it. "You have been granted permission to lift your limits."

_Finally!_

"Hey," said my opponent, who had been lurking over me. "You're awake. Well—not for long."

And his enormous foot came down to crush me.

I leapt to my feet and stopped him with one hand.

"Not so fast," I said.

Then I turned my face to the sky and cried, "_Lift the limit! Lift the limit!"_

_**-Hitsugaya Tôshirô**_

__"_Lift the limit!"_

"About time," I muttered to myself. Then I intoned, "Lift the limit." I relished the flow of reiatsu as it ran free around my senses, and my wounds even partially healed as a result of the energy surge.

"What is this…?" asked Qu Fong.

"'Applying the limit' is a process implemented by the captains and lieutentents of the Gotei 13," I replied. "We reduce our power to about twenty percent capacity to avoid causing any disturbances in the human world. Lifting the limit without permission is a very serious thing, because we could feasibly be detected by every single human in this city."

"But now," I couldn't resist adding, "my limit is lifted. Which means…my power is, effectively…quintupled."

Shawlong Qu Fong's jaw dropped in horror, and he backpedaled furiously.

I narrowed my eyes. "Do you really think I'm going to let you run?"

Flaring my wings, I easily overtook him. I raised Hyôrinmaru and declared, "Ryuusenka!"

Qu Fong turned around, and I brought my blade down directly between his eyes. A glassy layer of ice spread over him, and he froze into a solid mass.

Then he shattered…as did another of Daiguren's petals.

_**-Matsumoto Rangiku**_

I felt two more enemy reiatsu disappear, one right after the other. Both Renji and Tôshirô had won their battles.

It was time to end mine.

I pointed my zanpaku-tô at my opponent and commanded, "Growl, Haineko!"

And, just like that, it was over.

_**-Hitsugaya Tôshirô**_

__I hovered in the air, my breath coming in ragged gasps, lacking the strength to move. One thing I had purposefully neglected to mention to Qu Fong is that, with the limit lifted, my sudden burst of strength was harder to control, and therefore used up much more quickly.

_I – have to – land._

But I was too exhausted, and the last of my strength disappeared. The final petal of Daiguren burst with a musical crackling of icy shards.

My wings exploded, pelting me with chunks of ice, and my half-healed wound reopened, spitting red.

"Shi-shit," I gasped, and then I was falling…

_**-Matsumoto Rangiku**_

I looked up in time to see Tôshirô hit the ground a short ways away from me.

"Captain!" I cried, running over to him. His robes were streaked with blood, but I could tell his wounds weren't as bad as they appeared. He was more exhausted then anything. But, just in case…

I ran to the edge of the roof and called down into the street: "Orihime-chan? Would you come up here for a minute, please?"

_**-Kurosaki Ichigo**_

___I can't believe this guy!  
_

All I'd managed to put on him was one gash, across his stomach, and I'd had to release my bankai, just to do that. This guy, named Grimmjaw, had bragged about being of the elite branch of Arrancar, called espada. They were ranked from one to ten in increasing order of strength, but they were all exponentially more powerful than the other Arrancar.

Lucky me.

Anyway, I was going to lose, and I knew it, but I was going to finish this…

I lunged at him, but he reached up and stopped my zanpaku-tô with one hand, and sheathed his own. He started to back away.

"Hey! Where are you goin'? Get your ass back here and finish this!" I hollered.

"And hang around so your friends can get here, seeing as they've picked off their opponents?" Grimmjaw sneered. "I don't think so. I could beat you all, easily…but I'm bored of fighting you pathetic little shinigami."

"Then let's end this now!"

"Later, Kurosaki," he smirked, and vanished.

_That fucker…_

_Rukia!_

I went back to her, where the sobbing gigai was hugging Rukia with a death grip. Rukia appeared to have just opened her eyes.

"Rukia-sama, pyon! You're alive, pyon! Pyon! Pyon pyon pyonpyonpyon!"

Rukia ignored this and turned to me.

"Idiot," she rasped weakly. "I told you to run."

"No way," I said. "I've never been a runner. I'm _not_ gonna start now."

_**-Hitsugaya Tôshirô**_

_Falling_

_Flailing…_

_Then floating_

_And time is still_

_Healing_

_Repairing_

_Restoring_

_But time rests no longer_

_And I am falling back _

_Through time and space_

_Into a memory_

_Of a world in my mind_

_I've been here before…_

_-------_

A/N: Heehee, bows in Tôshirô's hair…not necessary _at all, _but funny! Hahaha I can picture his face, yay, the randomness!

Anyhoo…next chapter preview! Momo's POV again (woot woot!). But she's in a state of serious delirium, living her worst nightmare….

Mwahaha…sounds sinister, but it will be cool.

Where oh where is Tôshirô? That will have to wait until chapter seven….

And I officially know what I'm going to do now! This story is going to be so cool; now I just have to find time to write it! *sigh*

See you guys next chapter!

~Raye Lynne (Ducky)


	6. Chapter 6: Delirium

Chapter 6-Delirium

A/N: Yay! Thank you to my new reviewers, Janet, and PrincessOfHeartsNYP! For the rest of you, please take a minute or two after you read this to let me know what you think. I want to be a real author…your criticism/feedback means a lot to me, and is extremely helpful.

So…yeah.

Reviews=good!

Reviews=happy author=more chapters! ^_^

Okay, new chapter, enjoy!

-------

_There was nothing but the darkness._

_Choking, sickening black, robbing me of sight._

_Suspended in the midst of black, stretching on and on, forever…no end to be found._

_I have to struggle to move, like being bound by elastic bands. I turn my head, with effort, and open my mouth to call into the distance._

_Is anyone there?_

_But the darkness is like a liquid, flowing into my mouth and smothering my cries. _

_I can't breathe…_

_And whatever is supporting me gives way, and I start falling._

_Head over heels over head over heels…_

_…and I can't scream._

_It seems endless…was it seconds, or years? I can't tell, I just want it to stop… _

_Help me! Someone! Please!_

_My fall, then, is stayed: someone has grabbed my wrist. I look up._

_There he is, lit from within, like a beacon of hope, or an angel…_

_Hitsugaya-kun._

Catch me as I fall  
Say you're here and it's all over now

_Oh, Hitsugaya-kun…I doubted you. I doubted you, and I'm so sorry. Please forgive me._

_But those eyes of his…those incredible blue-green eyes; they look right through me._

_Hitsugaya-kun…?_

_Please…help me…_

_I feel his fingers loosen…_

_No! No! Don't let me go! Don't leave me here!_

_But he turns away, and looses his grip._

_No…!_

Speaking to the atmosphere  
No one's here and I fall into myself

_At full force, I hit a ground that I cannot see. I manage to pick myself up. The darkness still surrounds me; I still cannot breathe, or speak, or move, or scream…_

_… but there are figures I can see._

_Is that Abarai-kun? I think he can see me, too…but he's so far away, so far down the path of his own dreams of greatness that all he can do is look back and watch as I drown._

_Kira-kun! He is there, within reach; extending his hand to me; but now Ichimaru-taichô is there, and he turns to him instead._

_No! _

_Please, no…_

_I am surrounded by those with the power to help, but I am still alone…_

This truth drives me into madness  
I know I can stop the pain if I will it all away

Don't turn away  
(Don't give in to the pain)  
Don't try to hide  
(Though they're screaming your name )  
Don't close your eyes  
(God knows what lies behind them)  
Don't turn out the light  
(Never sleep never die)

_When I look again, they are all gone. One single shaft of light stands in the darkness, searing my deprived eyes. A figure steps into the light._

_Aizen-sama…_

I'm frightened by what I see  
But somehow I know that there's much more to come

_I cannot run to him, nor can I back away. I am not sure which I want to do…_

Immobilized by my fear  
And soon to be blinded by tears

_Aizen-sama? Why? Why did you hurt me? Was it you who killed all those people?_

_But he smiles, that warm, open smile meant only for me._

_I am being foolish. Of course it wasn't you. You would never do anything like that…_

_…but you did hurt me. Can you simply tell me why?_

_Please, Aizen-sama? Please?_

_The light is fading…_

_No! No; don't leave!_

I can stop the pain if I will it all away

Don't turn away  
(Don't give in to the pain)  
Don't try to hide  
(Though they're screaming your name )  
Don't close your eyes  
(God knows what lies behind them)  
Don't turn out the light  
(Never sleep never die)

_The light; it's reappearing, closer to me, surrounding me, washing over me in a warmth that should be blissful, had not my senses been so long deprived of any feeling. _

_And Aizen-sama is still there, radiating a light of his own._

Fallen angels at my feet  
Whispered voices at my ear  
Death before my eyes  
Lying next to me I fear

_He reaches out his hand to me. He doesn't say a word, but his smile says everything. He will take me away from here…_

He beckons me shall I give in  
Upon my end shall I begin

_Slowly, I raise my hand to meet his…_

Forsaking all I've fallen for I rise to meet the end

_There is a ferocious cry…the first sound, the first sign of something alive in this cold, dead world…_

_"NO!" it shouts._

_A hand closes roughly around my arm and throws me out of the column of light, sending me spinning. The darkness halts me, holding me prisoner, inky tendrils wrapping about me, claiming me once again for its own. I see it is Hitsugaya-kun; he has reappeared._

_You would return me to this? This threat of being erased, mind and soul? No…please, help me Hitsugaya-kun…_

_He draws his zanpaku-tô and strikes at Aizen-sama, a predatory snarl distorting his features. Aizen-sama, still smiling, raises his own blade and deflects it easily._

_No! I want to cry. No! Stop! You'll kill him!_

Don't turn away  
(Don't give in to the pain)  
Don't try to hide  
(Though they're screaming your name )

_I don't even know to whom I would call, if I could…I don't want either of them to die. I can't even see who is in more danger._

Don't close your eyes  
(God knows what lies behind them)  
Don't turn out the light  
(Never sleep never die)

_They stop. They both turn to me. Their eyes--warm gold and shimmering turquoise—stare into my very soul._

_"This cannot go on, Hinamori-kun," says Aizen-sama. "You can stop it. It can all go away. All you have to do is choose…what do you want?"_

Don't turn away  
(Servatis a periculum)

_I don't know; I don't know…_

Don't try to hide  
(Servatis a maleficum)

_"No," says Hitsugaya-kun. "Just go, Hinamori. Run; get out of here!"_

Don't close your eyes  
(Servatis a periculum)

_"Make a choice..."_

_Choose? My best friend since childhood, or my beloved captain and mentor?_

_I can't! Can't I have them both?_

Don't turn out the light  
(Servatis a maleficum)

_"Run, Hinamori! Go, now!"_

_I have nowhere to go; no way to run._

_And I do not run, but I do fall again…_

_Head over heels over head over heels…_

Servatis a periculum

_The choice…it's weighing me down…_

Servatis a maleficum

_…plunging me into the cold, lifeless black depths of the darkness, swallowing me whole…_

Servatis a periculum

_I have to escape from here!_

Servatis a maleficum

_But Tôshirô…Aizen-sama…I can't leave them; I can't!_

_I don't want to let them go…_

Servatis a periculum

_If I choose…_

Servatis a maleficum

_…it will be the end of one of them._

Servatis a periculum

_But, as I fall, I realize—if I don't choose…_

Servatis a maleficum

_It will be the end of me._

_No! No! Can't there be another way? One that doesn't hurt so much?_

_I don't want to die here…I don't want anyone to die here…_

_Set me free!_

_Someone, anyone, help me!_

_And still, I fall, spinning and spinning, and I know there will be no end, until I decide:_

_Choose?_

_Or don't?_

_No, please, don't make me choose. Who is making me do this? Don't they understand? _

_The two people I need the most…_

_The weight is crushing me…I can't take it anymore!_

_Someone!_

_Let me out! Let me out of here!_

_Somebody!_

_I have but one chance…I open my mouth; the darkness moved to suppress me, but I have found my voice._

_Someone; anyone; HELP ME!!!!!_

_I scream and scream and scream and scream and the darkness shatters and –_

--still screaming, I woke up.

-------------------

A/N: The song used in this chapter is "Whisper" by Evanescence! I love them! Originally, I wasn't going to use the Latin bit at the end, until I translated it. It means: "being saved is a risk; being saved is wicked". And I went, oh my god, that's perfect! This song represents a moral dilemma, and so does this chapter…so I used it. Obviously. ^_^ And it is cool…

I hoped you guys liked it! I'm looking forward to hearing from you!

Next chapter preview: Momo and Tôshirô – reunited at last! But they meet again under circumstances that are not exactly ideal: Something that involves Momo and hallucinations that later threaten her life…and, of course, we find out the location of a certain Shiro-chan (where we left off at the end of chapter five).

Don't miss it!

Okay, that's all for now. See you guys!

~Razzle Dazzle Raye Lynne


	7. Chapter 7: Reunion I

A/N: Wow! Lots of reviews since the last chapter was put up…thank you, thank you! Those of you who recently added this to your favs (larkinlover and kaykay692)…you rock! Thank you also to larkinlover for adding me to favourite authors, story alert, author alert, and for all of those glowing reviews!*beams* I am honoured! And as for your sage advice…I gotcha. So, from now on, songs will be announced at the beginning of the chapter.

And, Mitsuki Sakura, your comment was also duly noted. I'm pretty sure she calls him "Hitsugaya-kun" in the manga, but I'm trying to have her say "Tôshirô" more…typing "Hitsugaya-kun" all the time is pretty tedious. That and "Aizen-sama", too. I'd much rather write something along the lines of "rat bastard"! ^^

There is no song in this chapter, but there is a poem. I wrote it, so don't steal it, or there will be serious harm coming your way!!!!

-----------------------

Chapter Seven—Reunion I

_**Hitsugaya T**__**ôshirô**_

_Falling back _

_Through time and space_

_Into a memory_

_Of a world in my mind_

_I've been here before…_

_--------_

_Endless white_

_Silvery light_

_Stretching out around me_

_Crystalline_

_Glassy sheen_

_All I know is what surrounds me_

_Steady and slow_

_The sleet and the snow_

_Through the cold air fly_

_Many a time I've walked this plain_

_And, every time, I've seen myself die._

_Turning, I scan_

_The ice-coated land_

_And freeze, for something is near_

_It flies at me_

_Too quickly to see_

_Burning pain begins to sear_

_And then comes a flood_

_Of hot crimson blood_

_And I know I am far beyond help_

_Like every time before, I fall once again_

_Cold and lifeless as the ice itself._

_-----_

My eyes flew open, and I sat up with a gasp.

I looked around; I was back in Inoue's apartment; the first glimmers of morning light were piercing the windows. The room beyond the divide of the curtain was silent; Matsumoto was likely still asleep.

Wiping a layer of perspiration from my forehead, I struggled to ease my ragged breathing and to slow the frenzied pounding of my heart.

_What – the hell – was –that?_

I had thought the visions were gone for good…

I used to have them all the time, back when I still lived in the Rukongai, first district, with my grandmother and…Hinamori. At that point, I had never even considered becoming a shinigami, even after Hinamori had left for the training academy. But, each time I fell asleep, I would dream of the plain of ice, and it always ended in my death. However, each time, the vision progressed further until I met Hyôrinmaru for the first time.

Not long after that, I left for training to learn to control my raw, unrefined reiatsu – which, if left untamed, would be dangerous to those around me, and, more so, myself. The visions stopped that very day. Well, I still met with Hyôrinmaru – several times, until I could do it at will – but I stopped seeing my own death.

The visions, I'd decided, were a warning. They were trying to tell me the same thing that Hinamori had been trying to convince me of all along.

But now…

This was much different. Never before had my imagined death been so sudden, or so violent.

_And, if it's another warning…then what against?_

_----------------_

"Give me that, Matsumoto, before you hurt yourself! We don't even _need_ an acetylene torch for this!"

_I don't even want to know where she got it._

Two weeks had passed since my latest vision. I hadn't spoken a word about it, and I was trying not to dwell upon it myself. I hadn't had any more, but I knew better than to dismiss it as a bizarre side effect of Inoue's healing powers.

"Pass me that screwdriver over there."

This menial task was a relief to my senses -- something simple and non-stress-inducing (i.e. not fighting for my life), yet something that required complete focus, and removal from any other path of thought.

"Pass the wire cutters."

_And god knows I've got too much to think about..._

"All right...give me the soldering iron."

The one good thing was that there hadn't been any more detections of Arrancar.  
I stepped back and examined my handiwork -- a huge screen that covered one of the living room walls.

"It's ready," I said. "Connect me."

Matsumoto flipped a switch on the side of the screen, and the image of Commander Yamamoto appeared.

I inclined my head, as did Matsumoto. "Yamamoto-soutaichô."

He nodded. "Hitsugaya-taichô; Matsumoto-fukutaichô. Our sources have picked up no further traces of these 'Arrancar' you reported. Does this match with your information?"

"Yes."

"Good. You and your team will be here for a few more days, and then you will be able to return."

"That's all?" I asked. "I would have thought this reconnaissance mission would last for a few months, at least."

"I believe there will be little for the residents of Karakura to fear. We can predict Aizen's attack -- for we now know his specific purpose."

Neither I nor Matsumoto said a word, but there was a definite increase of tension in the air, and we stood at attention, waiting for the commander to continue.

Suddenly, there was a soft thump behind us. Turning, I saw that it was Inoue, who had just returned from school, and she'd dropped her bookbag in surprise -- she hadn't expected to see her living room turning into a communication centre.

"Don't worry; it's only temporary, Orihime-chan," said Matsumoto cheerfully.

Inoue laughed nervously and began to back out of the room. "It looks like I'm interrupting something really important...I'm sorry; I'll just--"

"No," said Yamamoto thoughtfully. "You should hear this, too. This concerns you humans as well."

"A-all right." She stepped a little closer to the screen.

Yamamoto began to explain. "Through days of research and reconnaissance, we have discovered this: Aizen is working to manufacture the Ou Ken."

I stiffened; Matsumoto gasped, and Inoue only looked confused. "What's-what's the Ou Ken?"

"The 'King's Key'," replied Yamamoto. "Legend says that there is a castle, hidden in the realm of the gods. Aizen seems to have a reason to believe that this castle is more than legend."

He continued, "Now that he has the Hogyoku in his grasp, all Aizen has to do is wait for its powers to fully awaken. Once this has occurred, he will be able to create shinigami-Hollow hybrids more powerful than any he can create now. When he assembles his massive army of Arrancar, he will open a portal from Hueco Mundo--the dimension where he is hiding--to the human world, and unleash his army to collect one million human souls."

Inoue gasped.

"You can see now why this concerns you...once Aizen has the million souls, he will be able to create the Ou Ken."

"And then what?" asked Inoue, in a voice barely louder than a whisper.

"It is said that the bearer of the Ou Ken -- and only the bearer -- will be capable of finding and unlocking the hidden castle. Legend says that he who enters this castle will reign as a god over all of the realms in existence."

"So he'll be like the king of the world..." Inoue trailed off.

"Except he'll be the king of _every_ world," said Matsumoto, an uncharacteristic note of bitterness in her voice.

No one else had seemed to pick up on the most important detail, so I asked, "How long will the Hogyoku take to awaken?"

Yamamoto nodded approvingly. "The Hogyoku has been 'asleep' for about one hundred years. Now, time travels faster in Hueco Mundo, but we have concluded it will take about four months. Which takes us back to what I was saying initially...you and your team, Hitsugaya-taichô, will remain behind for about another week, merely as a precaution. After that, you will return...and we will all prepare for a battle, come winter," he finished solemnly.

We were all quiet for a moment.

Inoue broke the silence. "I'd better tell Kurosaki-kun," she said. "And Sado-kun and Ishida-kun--" she broke off, and looked up at the commander. "Right?"

"Absolutely right," said Yamamoto. "You should go, immediately."

Inoue nodded, and left.

"I'll go tell Renji and the others," said Matsumoto.

"I'll go with you," I said. "That is, if you were finished, Commander...?"

"I was," said Yamamoto, "but there is someone else who has been waiting to speak with you."

_What? Who could possibly...?_

I turned to Matsumoto. "Go ahead without me; I'll catch up later."

"Okay..." Her curiosity was piqued, but she left without incident.

As soon as I was alone in the room, Yamamoto moved aside, and another figure stepped into view.

I froze. My throat contracted, making it difficult to breathe. I had been both longing for and dreading this day...

Forcing a deep breath, I found my voice, trying to make myself sound as casual as possible.

"Hinamori..." I managed. "You're awake."

_**Matsumoto Rangiku**_

I closed the door of Orihime's apartment, and I stood in the hallway.

Waiting.

And listening.

_**Hitsugaya T**__**ôshirô**_

At first, some small, naïve part of me thought everything would be all right.

Hinamori had exchanged her hospital gown for her shihakushô; her hair was neatly tied back into its usual cloth-covered bun and she was smiling.

But I saw the pale, waxy pallor of her face, and her smile did not reach her eyes, under which lay the wide purple rings of many a sleepless night. And I saw the way her hand unconsciously clutched at the lieutenant's badge she still wore on her right arm.

Kira and Hisagi now refused to wear their badges, denying any connection to their traitorous captains. They had accepted the reality of the situation.

But Hinamori…

Trying to keep my voice level, I asked, "How are you?" Even though it was obvious…

"I'm fine!' she replied, far too brightly. "I'm really okay now, Hitsugaya-kun."

"You haven't been sleeping." It wasn't a question.

"Well, not much…but there's been so much to do around here since – I mean, without – that is –"

"Dummy," I scolded. "Do you think you will be of any use to anyone if you don't even take care of yourself?"

She blinked. "But, Hitsugaya-kun…"

"Stop making those panda eyes at me! You can't recover properly unless you rest, you know. And," I added, "how many times do I have to tell you? Don't call me 'Hitsugaya-kun' anymore. It's 'Hitsugaya-_taichô' _now."

She smiled again, and, for a moment, it was real. "Right," she said, and I knew she was thinking about the same thing as me…

-----------------

_Hinamori was visiting me and Grandmother back in the Rukongai, soon after I'd discovered the reason for my visions. We were sitting in the front yard, under the peach tree, its branches bathed in blossoms._

_'Is it true, Shiro-chan?" she asked. "You're coming to join the Gotei 13?"_

_"Yes, it is," I replied shortly. "I'll be coming in a few weeks."_

_"Shiro-chan, that's so—"_

_"Stop calling me that!"_

_"Calling you what?"_

_"You know darn well what!"_

_"What? 'Shiro-chan'?"_

_"Yes!"_

_"'Yes, call me Shiro-chan'?"_

_"No--!"_

_"Shiro-chan; Shiro-chan!"_

_"Stop it!"_

_She laughed. "But I have to get it out now; I won't be able to call you that at the academy!"_

_"So, how about practicing not calling me that, starting right now?!"_

_"All right…'Hitsugaya-kun' it is."_

_"Rrgh, that's not much better…that does it: Hinamori, someday, you will have to call me 'Hitsugaya-taichô'."_

_"Okay," she smiled. "That sounds fair. You'd have to work really hard to earn that, though – you would really do everything it takes just to be called '-taichô'?"_

_"Why not? If I'm going to be a shinigami, I'm going to do it well."_

_"Hitsugaya-kun?"_

_The sun was setting behind us, streaking her hair with a soft orange glow._

_There was a pause._

_"Yes?"_

_"I get to call you 'Shiro-chan' until you come to the academy."_

_"What--?!"_

_"Shiro-chan!"_

_"No!"_

_"Shiro-chan!"_

_"Would you stop--?!"_

_"Shiiiiiiiiiiirooooooo-chaaaaaaaan!"_

_"Arrrrrrrrrrrrrgh!"_

_The surrounding area rang with the sound of her laughter…_

_-------------_

A moment later, though, her smile became nothing more than a mask again. A pretense. A lie. She was lying to everyone—herself most of all. But did she even realize this?

"Hi-Hitsugaya-taichô? Everyone here is saying such terrible things..." she trailed off nervously, then hit me with a question so blatant that I nearly staggered backwards.

"Are you going to kill Aizen-taichô…?"

I didn't answer, but my silence seemed to what she already knew – or what she had been told anyway, regardless as to whether or not she believed –

"You can't."

She said it so matter-of-factly – I'd expected desperation or pleading. But she was so firmly convinced of her ex-captain's innocence…

"Aizen-taichô is a good person; I know he is!" She was protesting, unsettled by my lack of response. "He just made a mistake! I just know that Ichimaru-taichô made him do all those bad things!"

"Hinamori…" I started warningly.

"Just think!" she cried. Now she was so passionate, she was almost hysterical. "You know it's true! It had to be! Surely you, Hitsugaya-kun, you can –"

Yamamoto's hand came into view then; he waved it gently in front of Hinamori's face, murmuring a kidô. Hinamori's eyes widened, then she collapsed into a deep sleep. Sasakibe, Yamamoto's lieutenant, who had been standing off to one side the entire time, moved forward to catch her before she could hit the ground, and supported her limp body.

"I am sorry," said Yamamoto softly. "I thought she was ready to speak with you. Clearly, I was mistaken."

I only nodded, not trusting myself to speak.

"You can expect a call back to Soul Society before a week has passed," said Yamamoto. "In the meantime, stay alert, and report anything unusual."

"Yes, Yamamoto-soutaichô."

The commander nodded, then terminated the connection.

I stood, staring at the blank screen, unable to get past what had just happened.

_Hinamori…_

The physical damage she'd been dealt was atrocity enough, but it was plain to see that her mid had suffered even more – she was, effectively, brainwashed.

I thought of the one who was responsible. Curling my shaking hands into fists, I hissed his name like a curse, imbuing it with every ounce of my loathing and hatred.

"_Aizen…"_

_**Matsumoto Rangiku**_

__Tôshirô walked out of the apartment, as always, the picture of unruffled calm. But I had heard everything. I could guess how he was truly feeling…

Of course, when he saw me, he knew that I'd been listening. If anything, though, he only heightened his pretenses at a stoic demeanor.

"I thought I told you to go ahead without me," he said, but he didn't sound angry that I was standing there. I could guess why: he had not betrayed any hint of weakness to anyone besides himself, so what did it matter if an outside party had overheard his conversation?

I realized, then, how different he and Momo were in that respect.

And yet, my heart ached for both of them.

_**Hinamori Momo**_

___No…_

_No…_

_Make it stop…_

_No…_

_No!_

_Wake up! Wake up!_

_But the dream goes on, relentlessly. It is all the more terrifying; I know what is coming now…_

_I search for something, anything to hold on to, grasping in the darkness. Nothing is there, and my heart is pounding, counting down the moments until the fall, the seemingly endless fall…_

_Head over heels over head over heels…_

_And Hitsugaya-kun is there again, holding me by the wrist. Tears of terror pour down my face as my hands claw their way up his arm._

_Don't let me go; don't let me go…_

_But, this time, he doesn't. Instead, he speaks._

_"Hinamori…you have to leave."_

_"Don't let me go…" I plead._

_"Don't you know you'll die if you stay here?!" he whispers furiously. "You have to leave; you have to."_

_"No, no…"_

_And then Aizen-sama is there, in the distance, walking towards us._

_"It's too late," says Hitsugaya-kun. He releases my hand, and I cry out, but I do not fall. I try to go to him – or am I trying to go to Aizen-sama? I don't know; don't make me choose! – but Hitsugaya-kun pushes me back._

_"Run, Hinamori, you have to run!" he yells, drawing his zanpaku-tô. He turns to face Aizen-sama, their twin blades black in the absence of light._

_My Aizen-sama speaks. "Why don't you stay, Hinamori? Everything will be all right. I promise." And he smiles._

_"No!" yells Hitsugaya-kun. "You have to run, Hinamori; run now; run!"_

_I clutch at my sides and fall to my knees, gasping. I am being torn apart…_

_They are fighting now, a whirl of shihakushô and haori, the darkness rent by the peals of ringing blades…_

_And then I scream in agony…_

_…for one of them is dead._

_I don't know who; they are both gone, and one is lost, and I am all alone, with the darkness reaching for me, surrounding me, suffocating me, threatening to erase me from existence…_

_I am all alone, with blood dripping from my hands…_

_------------_

I didn't remember if I'd screamed, but my throat was hoarse. I looked around to find myself back in my room in fifth division quarters, and started sobbing with relief.

_It's over now…_

Ever since I'd first awoken in the infirmary, I'd been having these horrible dreams every time I closed my eyes. The past several days, I'd been doing whatever I could to avoid sleep.

_You might mean well, Hitsugaya-kun…but when I close my eyes, I see too much._

I despaired to think of Hitsugaya-kun. He didn't believe in Aizen-sama. No one else did. Only I could see the truth. Aizen-sama had always been so good to me. Yes…he'd hurt me. But I was sure he hadn't wanted to. I had immediately realized who had truly been responsible for everything – the one who'd been watching me for a long time – the one who'd lead me back to my captain, almost to my death.

_Ichimaru-taichô!_

Others had tried to tell me that he was working under Aizen-sama's orders, but I knew better. It was the other way around – that was the only answer. Captain Ichimaru made Aizen-sama do everything: he'd made him kill the council members; he'd made him fake his own death, then write that letter that blamed Hitsugaya-kun. And he'd made him hurt me…Aizen-sama was always so protective of me, caring and nurturing. To be forced to do that to me – the damage that must have done to Aizen-sama – I couldn't forgive Captain Ichimaru.

No one else believed me, but no one else knew him like I did. I was the one closest to him, his lieutenant. I still wore my badge…I'd heard people whispering behind my back about that, but I wouldn't listen. I wore it as a symbol of my belief in my captain. A symbol of my loyalty, on which Aizen-sama had praised me even as he was about to kill me.

I would wear my badge.

They would see.

As for Ichimaru-taichô…I decided it then and there.

I would make it my mission to kill him.

_**Hitsugaya Tôshirô**_

One week later, we received the call to go return to the Soul Society.

I was torn. Of course, it would be good to go home…but I'd never thought that I would dread what I had to go home to.

_Do you even know what's been done to you…Hinamori? _

_**Hinamori Momo**_

__The hairs on the back of my neck stood up, and I whipped my head around, determined to catch him this time. But I saw nothing, not even a corner of his robes visible from around the corner.

But he was watching me. There wasn't a doubt in my mind.

My body ached with fatigue, but I would not sleep. The dreams would come again…

Shivers danced down my back, and around I spun again, to behold – nothing. I spun around again, only to behold – nothing. I turned my head away, but this time, I was ready. My shoulders tightened; I grasped the hilt of my zanpaku-tô, and waited.

The seconds crept by, agonizingly slow. I fought to keep my breathing from sounding ragged, but every heartbeat pounded in my ears.

Waiting…waiting…

_Creak._

I burst to my feet, and cried out in triumph as I caught a glimpse of his haori disappearing around a corner. I sprinted after him, but he always seemed to be just around the next corner…then the next, and the next.

I burst out the doors of the fifth division building.

There. Ten feet in front of me, he stood, waiting for me, with his ever-present gruesome smile.

_Ichimaru-taichô!!!_

I lunged forward, drawing my zanpaku-tô. I cried, "Snap, Tobi—"

And then Ichimaru-taichô was gone.

And there was nothing under my feet anymore.

I was falling…

I hadn't even seen the ravine, so intent I was on attacking Captain Ichimaru.

…head over heels…

But where did he go? That single thought wiped out everything else in my mind – including the kidô that could save me.

This wasn't like my dream at all. In this fall, there was an end – sharp rocks were rising up to meet me…

And then a voice yelled, "_Bakudô 37! Tsuriboshi!"_

I fell into a net of light that gently cushioned my fall, and I hung suspended, my head in a daze, only able to stare at my hand, white-knuckled, and still wrapped around Tobiume.

_What just happened…?_

There was a whisper of cold air next to me, and I looked up to see Hitsugaya-kun, his turquoise eyes flaring with fury.

"What the _fuck_ do you think you're doing?" he hissed.

"I-I don't know," I replied, breathless. And it was the truth.

He shook his head, his jaw clenched tightly. Reaching forward, he wrapped his arm securely around my waist and flared his icy wings. Within seconds, we were both back on solid ground.

Tôshirô let his bankai dissolve, and his wings disappeared. He turned to face me, arms crossed. "Explain."

I had never seen him this angry before.

"I—I—saw—Ichimaru-taichô, and I chased him, and then he was here, but he disappeared, and I was falling," I replied, barely coherent.

Tôshirô sighed, and I saw something flash across his face before he turned away. When he looked back at me, he was stone-faced again, but his voice had lost its harsh edge.

"I thought I told you to get some sleep."

"I – what?"

"You were hallucinating, Hinamori. You were chasing something that wasn't there."

_That would explain it, but – "_But it felt so real."

"And that is why you need to go inside and go to sleep. Right now."

"No…"

"Yes. Come on—"

"No!" I cried. "I can't!"

He blinked, surprised at my vehemence.

"You don't know what I see when I close my eyes!" I cried. My voice was hoarse from lack of rest. "You don't know what it's like to have to watch – I mean, to feel –"

"They're only dreams, Hinamori."

_"I saw you die!" _I screamed. "Tell me that I'm not supposed to be scared!" I looked him squarely in the eyes, and saw that his face had gone completely white. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing," he snapped. "I'm fine. You're the one who needs help. Come on." He pulled me to my feet, then released my wrist. I staggered and feel back down, surprising myself.

All at once, the exhaustion I'd been trying to ignore overwhelmed me.

"Look what you're doing to yourself," said Hitsugaya-kun. He bent down and helped me up, then walked back to fifth division, supporting me.

"No," I protested. "I'm fine. I don't want to sleep – I don't want to…" But my words were barely audible.

I felt a little bit guilty for what I'd said. _It wasn't necessarily Hitsugaya-kun who died in my dream, but –_

_Stop! Stop thinking about that!_

The next thing I was aware of was soft coolness of blankets covering me and my head being cradled by a pillow. Through bleary eyes, I saw Hitsugaya-kun, about to leave. "No," I called as loud as I could. "No; stay with me."

He faltered, then came back towards me.

"Sit down," I whispered, weakly patting the floor beside my futon.

He looked at me with a hint of an expression I couldn't describe, but he knelt down beside me.

I couldn't keep my eyes open anymore. Reaching out, I brushed the back of his hand with my fingertips, and, after a moment, felt his hand close loosely around mine.

I managed a small sigh of contentment. "Thank you -- Tôshirô," I murmured. "Just don't – please. Don't let me go."

I was so close to being asleep – he must have thought I already was, or else I doubt he'd have replied, tightening his grip on my hand, speaking in the softest of whispers: "I would never…Momo."

A/N: Aw, you gotta love Tôshirô! He totally rocks! Momo kicks some serious ass, too, when Aizen isn't screwing around with her mind.

NEXT CHAPTER PREVIEW!!!

Tôshirô vows to help Momo to be herself again…but, his first move doesn't exactly make him the most popular guy ever in her book. Plus: there may be hope for the reconciliation of the friendship between Momo, Renji, and Izuru.

Don't miss it!

I'D LOVE TO HEAR YOUR FEEDBACK! PLEASE REVIEW; IT WILL MAKE ME HAPPY!!!

See you next chapter!

~Raye Lynne ^_^


	8. Chapter 8: Mending Ties Living Lies

**Chapter 8: Mending Ties; Living Lies**

A/N: This chapter marks a very important turning point: this is where the story becomes entirely my own! It was about fifty-fifty before, but now it's all me! Woot woot ^^

One of my reviewers for one of my other Bleach fics has informed me of the fact that I am using the wrong accent on my 'o's. You've noticed I've been using "ô" all this time, but from now on, I will be using the correct form, "ō". So, thank you Coffee Papers for the correction advice _^ Thank you as well to new reviewer kyrie!

The rest of you, I don't know how many times I have to say it: I wanna hear from you! So, let's have it. Read, enjoy, and, PLEASE, review!

------------------

_**Hitsugaya Tōshirō**_

__I looked down at Hinamori. She slept peacefully, and her hand was relaxed in mine. But what she'd said rang in my head, a sinister echo:

_I saw you die!_

I should have been able to dismiss it as an errant nightmare…if it weren't for my own vision.

I don't believe in coincidence. This had to mean something…I moved my gaze back to Hinamori.

_If the idea of my death really tortures her so much…_

I'd never had any idea that it would make any difference to her if I were gone. If anything had happened to her – if she had died after Aizen---I didn't know what I would have done. When I'd seen her, on the floor, unmoving, bathed in her own blood, I felt as though I'd been hit repeatedly in the stomach with a sledgehammer. If the roles had been reversed…would Hinamori have felt something similar?

If this was true…I could help her. If I could help her to see me in place of Aizen, then she could see past her delusions, and realize the truth about that abhorrent traitor. I vowed to myself, then, that I would heal the damage done to Momo—mind, heart, and soul.

_**Hinamori Momo**_

At last—a sleep without dreams. I awoke feeling as though I'd slept for a year.

I sat up and looked over at Hitusgaya-kun, only to see him asleep, his white-haired head leaning to one side and resting on his shoulder. He looked so different asleep; his face was so calm in the absence of its usual scowl.

_He saved my life…_

And the way he'd said my name, right before I fell asleep – softly, gently, almost tenderly. The one word, so familiar to me, yet seemingly different when it came from him, had warmed me from the inside out and whisked me off to sleep, like a lullaby.

Sleep, with no dreams – because he was here now.

_Tōshirō…_

He would make everything all right. He'd always done before. He'd help me to make it all okay –

--once I could make him see the truth.

I would make him see – and then, together, we would bring Aizen-sama back.

_**Hitsugaya Tōshirō**_

I didn't realize I'd dozed off until I opened my eyes. I looked over – Hinamori was still sound asleep. Regarding her for a moment, I thought about what I would need to do to help her. And then, it came to me…

I rose quietly, so as not to disturb Hinamori, and then I began to make my way down to first division quarters, for my plan required a discussion with Commander Yamamoto.

------------

__Soon after, I went back to Hinamori's room. I wasn't sure, but I thought a small smile touched her lips for a moment when I sat down next to her again.

I sighed. She wasn't going to be smiling after I told her what I'd done. It was necessary…but that didn't change the fact that she was going to be furious.

_**Hinamori Momo**_

I gasped.

I blinked.

It felt like something had caught in my throat.

I couldn't believe it.

Gaping at Tōshirō, I choked, "You did _what?!"_

He would barely meet my eyes. "I told Yamamoto to demote you. _Temporarily," _he added hastily.

"W-why? Hitsugaya-kun, how could you?"

"You need to rest and recover, Hinamori. And you can't do that when you're practically drowning with all of a lieutenant's responsibilities piled on you."

"But I told you, I'm fine now!"

"No, you're not."

"Yes, I am!"

"You're not," he said, his gaze drilling into me. "I've known you my whole life, Hinamori. I think I know when you're not all right."

I paused. This was true…but I felt fine.

It was plain to see I wasn't going to get through to him this way, so I tried a new tactic.

"But I have to keep my rank! I have to keep the fifth division running until Aizen-sama comes back! What will he think if--?"

"'Aizen-_sama' _is not coming back," said Tōshirō scathingly.

I had meant to say "-taichō", but that wasn't the point, was it?

"Of course he is!" I protested. "He wouldn't leave me here forever!"

"He already did, Hinamori –"

"No! He's coming back!"

"He did more than just leave you alone—"

"Just stop!"

"—he left you—will you listen to me?!"

"No!!"

"_He left you for __dead__, Hinamori—"_

"Because Ichimaru-taichō—"

"Shut up! _SHUT UP!!"_

Shocked by this uncharacteristic outburst, I fell silent.

"Aizen tried to _kill _you, Hinamori! He decided you were nothing to him, and yet you stand here like a little lost puppy, waiting for someone who hasn't given you a second thought since—"

My anger flared up again. "You're wrong! He cares about me! He told me! He said he was happy to have me as his subordinate!"

"That's all you were to him, a subordinate! Nothing but another pawn for him to manipulate!"

"_You're lying!!" _I screamed. Then I realized it.

"You're jealous!" I accused. "You're jealous of Aizen-sama—" I meant to say "-sama" that time; there was no point in hiding how I thought of him now – "because you wish Matsumoto-san was as loyal to you as I am to him!"

He had the audacity to roll his eyes, as though I were being ridiculous and unreasonable.

"Matsumoto has absolutely nothing to do with this," he snapped. "And, for the record, she is as loyal to me as any captain has a right to expect."

"More so than me?!"

"Now who's jealous?" he asked with a smirk.

"I can't believe you!" I shrieked. "Is this some kind of _joke _to you?"

To my surprise, he immediately sobered. "No," he said quietly. "Far from it."

I just stood there, fuming, and not sure what to say next.

But it was Tōshirō who broke the silence.

"You're a mess, Hinamori," he said flatly. "This only proves to me that I'm making the right decision."

I remained silent.

"Give me your badge."

"No."

"Hand it over."

"No!"

With lightning speed, he unsheathed Hyōrinmaru and rested its tip on the white band that bound the badge to my left arm.

"Give me your badge," he demanded, eyes blazing.

Tears welled up in my eyes. Looking the other way, I tore the badge off my arm and flung it at him. Then I threw myself down o my futon, sobbing.

Tōshirō stood there for a minute, before I heard the footsteps that meant he was walking away.

_**Hitsugaya Tōshirō**_

_I'm doing the right thing; I'm doing the right thing._

But, when Hinamori had started crying, it was harder to believe…

I'd wanted to say something, but no words would come, so I'd simply left.

Now, hours later, I wandered between buildings, aimlessly, wondering what my next step should be. The only thing I'd decided on was that I would not tell anyone about Hinamori's hallucinations – I'd given Yamamoto the same excuse I'd given Hinamori, about needing more time to rest. There would be many who would _think _they could help her, but not one of them knew her like I did.

I reached into the pocket on the inside of my haori, unconsciously fingering Hinamori's badge.

_What now…?_

I rounded a corner, and saw Abarai walking towards me.

"Hitsugaya-taichō," he said, "I was looking for you. What's going on?"

"You'll have to be more specific."

"I was just talking with Yamamoto," he clarified. "He's asked me to temporarily take the place of fifth division lieutenant."

_That makes sense…the sixth company suffered no losses; Kuchiki can manage things on his own for a short period of time._

He continued, "I asked why, but I was told to discuss it with you." Abarai stood, waiting for an explanation.

"I asked Yamamoto to demote Hinamori for the time being," I said. "I didn't think that she will be able to recover properly if she's overworked, and he must have agreed with me."

'Why was I picked?"

"Yamamoto was not influenced by me with that decision. It's common sense, though – sixth division is, more or less, the only one that can spare a lieutenant right now. First and fourth divisions are overworked; third and ninth are, of course, relying solely on their lieutenants to run things, and none of the others are fit to lead a company in the absence of their captain."

Abarai smiled wryly. "You include your own vice-captain in that statement?"

'I shudder to think what Matsumoto would do if I didn't set her limits."

Abarai looked thoughtful. "Since I'm a friend of Hinamori's…maybe Yamamoto thought that she would respond better to her replacement if she knew him well. And Kira can't do this job, obviously."

"Perhaps…"

"How did she react? I'm guessing you were the one who broke the news to her, since you went behind her back…" he trailed off.

_You don't have to make it sound so malicious._

"She was furious," I admitted, "but she doesn't realize yet that it is for her own good." Suddenly, the badge in my pocket felt extremely heavy, its weight increased tenfold by…guilt?

I drew it out and offered it to Abarai. "Here," I said. "You don't have to wear it; however, until Hinamori is reinstated as lieutenant, this is rightfully yours." I added, "Keep it safe."

Abarai took the badge carefully. "I will." He looked down at it for a moment, tilting it so that the light reflected off the polished copper. All at once, he stated, "I'd better report to fifth division."

I nodded his dismissal, and he left. I was alone with my thoughts again.

_What now…?_

_**Hinamori Momo**_

__For two weeks now, I'd barely surfaced from the confines of my room, so determined was I to avoid Tōshirō. Ironically, I'd been sleeping more than ever over the course of these days, not having any other way to pass the time. I'd had some dreams, but never of the darkness. The only things I could remember upon waking were two faces – Tōshirō's and Aizen-sama's—and an intense, burning longing.

If anything, my left arm felt heavier without my badge. There was an even greater irony here: Tōshirō had been the one to take it from me, when he'd been the initial reason I'd worked to obtain it…

_Do you remember that day? That day many, many years ago? When we were but children, in mind as well as body…when the world we live in now didn't even seem a possibility…until that day._

_Tōshirō, do you remember? _

_That day when everything changed…_

My thoughts were interrupted by a knock on the door, and I started, my heart missing a beat.

Tearing my eyes away from the ceiling, I rolled off my futon and stood up.

_If it's T__ōshirō, he's getting the door slammed in his face…_

But, when I opened it, I was struck by surprise, then I calmed, and managed a small smile.

"Kira-kun…"

_**Kira Izuru**_

___How can I face Hinamori-kun? The last time I saw her, we were crossing blades. And she blames my captain for everything._

_But, with her captain gone, too, we have common ground, the best place to take the first steps to repair a friendship lost._

_But will she hate me? Because I didn't allow her to attack Ichimaru? If I'd stood by and let her fight him, would Aizen still have been able to trap her in the circumstances where she nearly died? Or would my ex-captain have killed her himself?_

_We will never know. Time cannot go back; we can only go forward, and move on._

_I earned Matsumoto-san's forgiveness, but she and I have little history. It's easier to forgive someone about whom your knowledge of their character, their strengths and weaknesses, is limited. The more complex a structure is found to be, there are more methods that can be seen in which to break it._

_Hinamori-kun knows me well – can she forgive me?_

_I will never know, unless I cease to fight for the past, and take the next step forward, and move on._

_---------------_

'Is this a bad time?" I asked.

"No…" Hinamori-kun replied. "Would you like to come in?"

I entered the room, and she closed the door behind me.

"You weren't busy, were you?" I asked.

"No," she replied, her voice hard. "I haven't had a lot to do since I was demoted."

"Right…" I trailed off awkwardly. "Well, it's not because you were doing a bad job that you lost your position. You just need to heal."

"Why does everyone keep saying that? No one seems to understand that I am fine. I'm _fine."_

"In that case, I'm happy for you."

Her eyes lingered on my upper left arm. "At least you had a choice as far as wearing—or not wearing, I guess—your badge goes."

"I'll start wearing it again, someday, when all of this is over," I said. "For right now, though – I don't want any connections with my former captain."

'Of course not," said Hinamori-kun, smiling. But her eyes were filled with – pity. For me. She felt sorry for me, even though she'd suffered more damage than Hisagi-kun and myself combined. But she didn't seem to realize this; it was like she wouldn't even admit the possibility to herself.

I looked away; her gaze was too disconcerting. It wasn't…right, somehow. "Hinamori-kun…the real reason I came here is to tell you – I'm sorry."

"You don't need to be," said Hinamori-kun. She was smiling still, but it didn't look like her. She appeared as someone else; she was Hinamori Momo in appearance only, not soul.

She continued, "I can't fault you for loyalty to your captain. I would have done the same thing. In a way, I still am, aren't I?" She laughed; the sound did not belong to the Hinamori-kun I knew, and I almost shivered. "I'm the only one who believes in Aizen-sama, it seems! But you believe, don't you, Kira-kun?"

I could not answer. "Will you accept my apologies anyway?" I asked, trying to change the subject.

'All right, if it will make you feel better, I accept your apology, Kira-kun." Her pretense at a smile faltered. "And I hope that you will, in turn, accept mine. I'm sorry, Kira-kun. It was not you I was angry at."

"Of course. I understand."

"Good. I'm so happy you're yourself again, Kira-kun."

There had been a time when I was somewhat corrupted by my position and power as a lieutenant, and had closed my eyes to what was right. But no more.

_Now that I have opened my eyes, though, I see Hinamori-kun, and she has been blinded. Worse, she doesn't seem to care, or even notice._

_I don't want to risk breaking what has just been mended…but a true friend wouldn't let her live like that. And I would rather see the real Hinamori Momo than this – shell._

"Hinamori-kun…have you ever thought to consider—" I paused, losing my nerve.

'Yes?" she said, eyes wide with curiosity.

'Have you ever--? What I mean is, Hisagi-kun and I—we're moving on. We are working to get through this. Our captains have abandoned us –" I said this unflinchingly "—but we have accepted that."

She remained silent.

"But you—you are desperately clinging onto a belief that is – it's not going to happen, Hinamori-kun. Aizen has not only gone; he was the leader of the traitors." Hinamori-kun was staring at me in shock and anger. "It may not be what you want to believe, but it's the truth," I said hurriedly—but as gently as I could.

Her eyes narrowed. "Truth?" she said. "Truth is relative to belief. What I believe – that is what is truth to me. And I believe in Aizen-sama."

How passionate she was! Her words were sharp and cutting, unlike anything Hinamori-kun had ever said.

All at once, she calmed herself. "I'm sorry, Kira-kun. I didn't mean to argue with you just after we made amends."

"That's okay…I should probably go now, though."

'Duty calls, right?" Another lifeless smile.

"Right." I went to the door.

'Kira-kun?"

I turned around.

"Thank you for coming," said Hinamori-kun. "I've missed you."

I managed a small smile. "Me, too."

I stepped out of her room, closed the door behind me, and sighed.

_I still do._

_**Abarai Renji**_

___Good freaking god._

_Has it seriously been a month already? One month since we learned of Aizen's plans—one month out of the four we have until the inevitable battle versus the masses of Arrancar he will be sure to have created by then. One month, gone so quickly._

One month. Little more than four weeks.

For three of those weeks, I'd been working three jobs. Yes, three. In taking over for Hinamori, I had shouldered the responsibilities of both the lieutenant _and _the captain of the fifth company. On top of that, I still had my duties as lieutenant of the sixth division.

Do you think you know the meeting of the word 'exhausted'?

Trust me, you don't.

But, every night, as I prepared for my on-average-two-hours of sleep, I thought about Hinamori's badge. Hitsugaya had told me to keep it safe – I'd just put it in an empty drawer. No one knew I had it, and, even if they did, no one would be stupid enough to try to steal it from me.

In thinking of Hinamori's badge, though, I thought of Hinamori. Then I thought of the badge again, Hinamori again. And I decided that, at the first opportunity, I'd go and see her.

_**Hinamori Momo**_

__I stood on the balcony, allowing the winds of the dying summer to embrace me. Belying their warmth were hints of a chill, a promise of autumn. In this medley that was the wind, I savoured the colder notes. For autumn was coming, and after autumn was winter.

_"We must prepare for battle, come winter," _Yamamoto-sōtaichō had said. But there would be no battle; I was certain. He must be mistaken, and winter shall simply be when Aizen-sama returns, surely…? For, in my latest dreams, snowflakes were falling, and then we were reunited…

I sensed someone approaching me from behind, but there was no hostile intent. I turned to see Abarai-kun. He met my eyes and said, "Hey, Hinamori."

"Hi, Abarai-kun," I replied.

"You look good, Hinamori," he said. "Though, the last time I saw you, you were still in the infirmary."

"Really? They never told me anyone came to visit me. But you did?"

'Yeah, a couple of times." He stared out over the balcony for a minute. It was dusk, and the lights of the Rukongai glimmered like fallen stars in the distance. "It doesn't exactly make up for lost time, though," he said finally.

"Well, no…but it's not your fault I was in a coma," I said brightly, trying to lighten the mood.

His face darkened. "No, it wasn't _my_ fault…"

I was gripped with a feeling of dread. "Abarai-kun…please. I don't want to talk about Aizen-sama. I know what he did to you and Kuchiki-san and Kuchiki-taichō, but I still think it was just a misunderstanding. Please don't say you're only here to make me think differently, because I don't want to argue with you, and I can believe what I want to believe, right?" My voice rose, and broke on the last word. "Right?"

Abarai-kun didn't respond for a long time. He finally replied, "You can believe what you want, Hinamori. But if you set your sights on one belief only, and close your mind to all others, you're going to get hurt again."

"'Again'?" I'm fine." _Why doesn't anyone believe __anything__ I've been saying?_

I felt a prickle of irritation as he pretended not to hear me. Instead, he said, "I would ask how you've been doing all these years, Hinamori, 'cause I came here hoping to catch up a little. But, with everything that's been happening, it doesn't really matter, does it? I mean, it seems like it was never important anyway."

"Not for me!" I cried. "Those years were the best of my life!" _And I will have many more, once everything is better. Once Aizen-sama comes home. Once everyone realizes that he is still a good person._

_Once Captain Ichimaru is dead – once I kill him._

I paused, then added, more softly. "I did miss you, though, Abarai-kun. You and Kira-kun." _And Tōshirō…but I don't see __him__ trying to makes things better._

"Yeah, I just talked to Kira the other day. It was a freaking miracle we happened to have a break at the same time, but anyway…" he became thoughtful. "See, I never thought that it would be something like this that would kind of bring the three of us back together, you know? But, here we are, talking – I mean, really _talking—_for the first time in years." He smiled wryly. "At least something good is coming out of all this."

"You're right," I replied. "Isn't it ironic, though. Chasing your dream parts you from what is precious to you. Only to reunite you when, suddenly, your dreams are torn from your grasp, and you're told that, no, something else is more important right now, and what you really want goes on hold, and you're thrown together with everyone else who didn't have a choice…" I faltered. "That's not exactly what I meant to say."

"I get it," said Abarai-kun. "But, someday—it may feel like all this was for the best."

I didn't know what to say to that.

"I kind of need to go now, Hinamori," Abarai-kun said. "I shouldn't even have stayed for this long – there are literally mountains of paperwork that need to be done."

"Okay…but you'll come again soon, right?"

"When I can…woah, hold up a minute!" He had been about to leave, but he came back abruptly. "I almost forgot what I came here for. That's what happens when I get all sentimental," he said jokingly. "Anyway, I thought you might want this back." He reached into the folds of his shihakushō and drew out –

"My badge!" I cried. "Abarai-kun, how did you get it?"

He looked at me, confused. "Didn't you know? I was made to act as temporary fifth lieutenant, until you came back."

"Oh…"

"You need to get out more – shutting yourself away isn't doing you any good." His tone was teasing, but, I could tell that, underneath, he was serious.

"Well," I managed, "I know that you'll do a good job, Abarai-kun."

"Thanks…but, here, take your badge back. I thought that it's only right that you should keep it, even if you can't wear it right now."

I reverently took it from his outstretched hand, then held it close. "Oh, thank you so much, Abarai-kun!"

"Yeah, no problem. If you ask me, I don't think it was necessary for Hitsugaya to take away your rank. It obviously is not doing you that much good." His words held hints of venom.

"Don't judge him so harshly," I admonished. "I think he's just trying to do what's best for me."

"No offense, Hinamori, but I don't really think that thoughtfulness is that guy's strong suit."

"It is, more so than you think! Did you know, he only takes a personal day once a year, to go visit his grandmother on her birthday? And he still sends her half his paycheck, even though she's so rich by now that she doesn't even need it, and he still writes a whole bunch of letters, even after all these years!"

He relented. "Yeah, I get it. I forgot that he came to visit you, too, when you were still unconscious."

My heart missed a beat. "He did?"

"Yeah…every day, so Matsumoto said."

"Oh," I replied, softly. _I didn't know he cared that much…_

"Well, as much as I hate to, I need to go back to work," Abarai-kun said. "Trust me—you're not missing much."

I smiled, though my heart wasn't really in it. I still missed my work.

Abarai-kun smiled back, more certainly. "Good seeing you, Hinamori."

"You, too," I replied, and then he was gone.

First Kira-kun…now Abarai-kun…

The sun would come out after a storm, it seemed. The first steps had been taken to repair the bonds of our friendship. Together, we would mend our past, and face our futures. This time – leaving one another behind would not be an option.

_Kira-kun…Abarai-kun…_

_Tōshirō…_

Our friendship hadn't been the same for a very long time. For a few terrible days, it seemed as though we may be enemies. Now, things were simply a mess.

But this was a time of healing, it would seem. My old friends had returned to me, bringing an unspoken promise of change.

I doubted that Tōshirō would come to me. But that needn't stop me from going to him.

_"Don't judge him so harshly," _I'd said.

Maybe it was time for me to take my own advice.

A/N: And, that's another chapter! Not the most exciting, I know…but essential.

And, yay for Hinamori/Kira/Abarai sidebar plots!

**Next chapter preview: **Even when Momo and Tōshirō are on speaking terms again, Shiro-chan struggles to make a certain Aizen-ized Momo listen to reason.

But, what is this? In the midst of impending chaos, the two are beginning to be drawn closer to each other than ever, and in ways they never expected.

Look out for "Chapter Nine- Falling Anew": Coming soon!


	9. Chapter 9: Falling Anew

**Chapter Nine: Falling Anew**

"When the time comes when what you want and what you need are opposite from each other, only someone who truly loves you will make the choice to give you what you need." ~Rylan Hornall

----------------

_**Hinamori Momo**_

I made my way through the tenth division, and nearly walked right into—

"Rangiku-san! Is—is Hitsugaya-kun in his office?" I asked.

"I hope so," she replied, "because, if he's not, it means he's out looking for me!"

"Did you run out on the paperwork again?"

"You didn't see me, okay, Momo-chan?" she said by way of answer. She hurried away.

I couldn't hold back a smile.

_Some things never change…_

_…I wish there was more that stayed the same. Or that it would be easier to change things back, at least._

_T__ōshirō…once I talk to him, I know he'll help me. Together, we'll make everything the way it was. No more fear, no more words of war – and Aizen-sama will come back._

I reached Tōshirō's office, and gently knocked on the closed door.

Immediately, I regretted it; a wave of panic swept over me.

_I've never come to see him at work before—what if he thinks it's weird that I came now? What if he's still mad at me? What if we get into another fight? What if--?_

His voice replied wearily, "Yes?"

I opened the door, and Tōshirō was slumped over his desk, resting his head on his hand, his face tilted towards me. I caught a flicker of surprise crossing his features.

"Hinamori? For a minute, I thought you were Matsumoto…I should have guessed otherwise, I suppose."

"Hitsugaya-k—taichō? Can I talk to you? Please?"

His eyes drifted slowly towards the mountain of forms that surrounded him.

"Forget it," I said quickly. "It doesn't matter."

"I doubt you'd have come to see me if it didn't matter. You're not one for social visits during works hours," he reminded me.

"Yes—well, you're busy, and—"

"—I need a distraction. Desperately. So, what do you want?" he said, not harshly.

I took a deep breath. "I came to say I'm sorry."

He didn't say a word, nor did his expression shift.

I tried again. "So—I'm sorry…?"

Nothing.

"I shouldn't have reacted the way I did. I understand you were only trying to help." _Even though I'm completely fine…_

"Hinamori…" Tōshirō started. "I—" he paused. "Maybe I should have given you some warning, at least," he finally said, awkwardly.

"That's true," I said. "So…we were both wrong, you're saying?"

He shrugged. "You can see it that way, if you want."

I thought for a moment. "Does that statement apply to more than just this?"

"What do you mean…?"

"Are you willing to acknowledge the possibility that I'm right?"

"About…?"

"Aizen-sa---taichō. Aizen-taichō."

His face darkened. "You talk about considering possibilities," he said quietly. "But you won't even deign to imagine that someone else may be right."

"But, Tōshirō, I just know—"

"What if everybody 'just knows'? What does that mean? Where does it get us?"

I thought about it. I just knew that Aizen-sama was innocent, forced into something he didn't want to do. Tōshirō—and everyone else, it seemed—'just knew' that he was a traitor. If neither mindset would bend…then we had reached an impasse.

Nothing could move forward. Nothing could change.

But, nothing could change back, either…

"All right," I said.

"What?"

"I'll accept that you _may _be right," I said, my voice wavering a little.

Tōshirō, to my surprise, nearly smiled. "Hinamori, that's…"

I broke in. "Only if you promise to do the same thing for me. Can you do that?"

He said nothing, then stared at the floor, brow furrowed.

"Tōshirō…?"

_**Hitsugaya Tōshirō**_

_You have no idea what you're asking of me._

_I was there; I spoke to him. He confessed—no, __boasted__—that he was the one responsible for everything…_

_..right before he nearly killed me, too._

But Hinamori didn't know about that…

…and I wasn't about to tell her.

The preservation of my pride had nothing to do with this. If Hinamori had refused to sleep for weeks because she had suffered mere _dreams_ of my death – I would not revert her to that hallucinatory state and the dangers we both knew it presented.

So the specifics of my role in the episode of Aizen's escape would remain a secret. For now, anyway…

_I healed. I fought my way back to good condition. And I made you a promise, that I would heal you, too._

_And, if I agree to this…will it help you? Or will it bind you still more to what you want to believe?_

_I don't think I have a choice…you always had a stubborn streak._

_But I also know that you will keep your promise._

_This goes against my better judgment…but if it has a chance of helping you…_

"Agreed," I said, and I looked up to meet her eyes.

They were lit up with a kind of alien joy – she was truly happy, or, more accurately, she thought she was. Aizen had warped her mind and emotions so badly…

The light in her eyes---the blank, artificial happiness. I looked away, repulsed.

_**Hinamori Momo**_

A wave of relief washed over me. Tōshirō had agreed to consider things. I had thought that convincing him was going to be more difficult.

But, I had done it. Now, he would have to see the facts, and, soon, change his mind. Then the two of us can convince everyone else.

"Thank you, Tōshirō," I said.

"For what?"

"For understanding."

Eyes downcast, he replied, "You don't need to thank me. Actually, I'd prefer it if you didn't."

"Okay, then I take it back!" I replied brightly. "I suppose I should be going…" Even though I was reluctant to leave. Then something occurred to me. "…unless you'd like some help."

"If I let you work, wouldn't that defeat the point of not being a lieutenant and having nothing to do, so you can rest…?"

_I'm fine! _But I remembered my promise, and tried to see things his way. "I suppose you're right."

"You wouldn't want to be doing this, anyway."

I blinked. _Did __Tōshirō __just say something that could be misinterpreted as comforting?_

"If you insist on helping, you can tell me where Matsumoto is."

"I haven't seen her."

"You suck at lying, Hinamori."

I felt my face heat up. He'd always been able to see right through me. "Okay, I've seen her, but I don't know where she is, exactly."

"If you run into her again, tell her to get in here and do her job." He paused. "But don't trouble yourself, all right? It's more important that you rest."

"I'm fine," I blurted automatically.

He looked me straight in the eye. "You will be," he said firmly. "I really want that for you."

That was twice in as many minutes that Tōshirō had said things that weren't like him at all.

After a beat, he added, sounding like himself again, "I don't want to have to save you again, got it?"

As I turned to leave, I replied, "Don't worry…I won't fall into any more ravines!"

And I left, with a kind of buoyant feeling.

_It will all be okay now…_

_**Hitsugaya Tōshirō**_

_'Ravines'?_

_Momo, do you think I would complain…_

_…if __that __was the only thing I had to save you from?_

_**Hinamori Momo**_

I tried to rest, honestly, but I found myself to be far too jubilant.

_Soon, soon everything will be just like before. Everything will be perfect again!_

What I really wanted was to soar, lighter than air, proclaiming to the skies my pure happiness. But I was so cruelly grounded.

So, I practiced my kidō instead.

Many would scoff at this substitution, but kidō didn't mean to them what it did to me. To me, it was an artform. Others felt restricted by the 100 spells; to me, they were like colours, waiting to be blended to form thousands of possibilities, and little fulfilled me more than finding ways to combine them and create something entirely new.

One element, flowing into the next, flawless, effortless.

A medley.

A dance.

Let your will guide you, and anything is possible.

I knew what I wanted, and willed it to be so.

Guided by burning desire, I began my dance.

A whole new world lay before me…

_**Hitsugaya Tōshirō**_

After a time, close to another month, there was finally a lull in the work that needed to be done. The rest was nothing short of a miracle – it was expected to be another six weeks until things picked up again.

Of course, the fortnight that would follow would be far more hectic and exhausting than any of its predecessors. And, after that, we would be headed directly into war.

For now, though, what preparations could be made had been made, at least on my end, and there was nothing else to do but wait.

Well—I shouldn't say 'nothing'…

_**Hinamori Momo**_

"But, Tōshirō—"

"Is it difficult to understand? Just come with me."

"Why? I'm fine right here."

"You need to get out sometimes."

"I have—"

"When's the last time you've been outside?"

"Um—"

"Exactly."

I'd lost this one, but I had to smile. It was almost like we were kids again, bickering over something so foolish. It brought back so many memories…

"Just come for a walk," said Tōshirō. "It will be good for you.

"And—" his eyes held a hard, stern expression that shattered my reminiscing "—there are some things you need to see."

_**Hitsugaya Tōshirō**_

The first thing I did was to lead Hinamori to the cliffs looking down on the sparring plaza in front of the eleventh division buildings, where nearly every shinigami was assembled. Kenpachi was addressing the group; Kusajishi Yachiru was standing on his left; Madarame was on his right.

Momo was confused. "What's--?"

"Shhh," I replied. "Just listen."

"You'll all have to be ready to fight to your last breath!" Kenpachi was saying. "You're here today to make sure that 'last breath' doesn't come too soon. We are going to need all of you to step up to your duties as shinigami. These 'Arrancar' claim to be fearsome warriors, but if we give 'em everything we've got, they'll be no match for the fury of the Gotei 13!"

The crowd cheered.

Madarame took over. "You'll have to do whatever it takes to win your battles. They're gonna come in huge numbers, and we can't mess around. Never stop; never hesitate – and there's not gonna be any time for sportsmanship. Use every dirty and underhanded trick you can think of –'cause you can be damn sure they're gonna be doin' the same thing."

"Show no fear; show no weakness; show no mercy!" Kenpachi roared, and the crowd yelled their approval.

Momo turned to face me, eyes wide. "I-I don't understand…" Her voice trembled a little.

I couldn't look her in the eye. This was hurting her…

_…but I think I'm starting to get through to her._

Next, we went to the second division, to Soi Fong's dojo—a wooden platform on the grass, surrounded by a waist-high bamboo fence, and a pillar-supported roof built in the style of an ancient Chinese temple. All the members of the Secret Militia were there, sparring with one another, in pairs. Soi Fong stalked amongst the fighters, her haori flaring, occasionally kicking one partner out of a fight and demonstrating the proper technique—with no restraint of force—on the one remaining. The militia members were trained to take hits, however, and most got to their feet after a few seconds. One, however, stayed down, moaning in pain. Soi Fong ruthlessly picked him up by the front of his robes and yelled in his face: "Stand up, fool! You can't expect to prevail in areal fight if you can't even stay on your feet in training!" She released him in disgust. "Grow a spine, you pathetic wimp!"

The man bowed low. "I beg your pardon, taichō."

But Soi Fong had already left to examine the rest of her wards.

She was always waspish in temperament, but she was now under a lot of pressure, and was none the softer-hearted for it. I knew there would not be a single person, the 'pathetic wimp' included, who would blame her for it.

"Tōshirō—why are you doing this?" asked Momo.

I wouldn't answer her. "Just—come on."

I led her to the infirmary buildings; the windows were open, and the voice of Unohana-san could be heard.

"…and so, we need to be prepared for anything and everything. We've gathered as much information as we could about the Arrancar, but there may be unpleasant surprises, and the only thing we can do is to be ready. One thing we have learned, however, is a unique talent these creatures possess: the Arrancar can create and release concentrated bursts of energy, called 'cero'. If the target is not vaporized instantly by the cero—" there were a few gasps—"it will, at the very least, result in serious burns, and you will be instructed presently on how to treat such wounds."

There was a pause. "I'm sorry to say that, in a few weeks, we will all be very busy. There will be many casualties. Many will be injured, and it is nearly certain that we will be unable to save them all. The loss of a patient – to those of you who have not yet borne this terrible burden, I am afraid that soon you shall, and, that it is something you cannot prepare for."

I could almost hear her shaking her head. "There is no greater atrocity than war."

"War?" whispered Momo. Then she stared straight ahead, mouthing the word.

_War…_

And then she started laughing.

Given the circumstances, it was the most terrifying sound I have ever heard.

_**Hinamori Momo**_

The ridiculousness of it all had finally struck me. Everyone was practicing swordplay and martial arts, talking of death and injury – preparing for war that would never come.

It wouldn't; it couldn't because Aizen-sama would never bring it.

It was all so outrageous…what else could I do but laugh?

_**Hitsugaya Tōshirō**_

The next thing I remembered, I was standing in one of the fields, alone, my heart racing. I must have run…

I couldn't believe it—the truth was staring Hinamori in the face, and yet she could still deny it! How did she rationalize it to herself?

_And what the hell am I going to do now?_

_**Hinamori Momo**_

_T__ōshirō…?_

_Tōshirō, why did you run?_

Something heavy was blooming deep in my chest.

…doubt…?

_I'm so confused…things used to make sense._

_Aizen-sama…wouldn't…_

_…no…!_

The sky above me was an eerily flawless blue, and the chill bit into me like the teeth of an unseen beast, its jaws holding me fast; I could not leave.

_What if…Aizen-sama…?_

_No!_

_Tōshirō…_

I felt so heavy…so dizzy…

_What if…?_

_…_nauseous…

_Tōshirō, where—why--?_

I couldn't take it! And so I started laughing again.

_Ridiculous. Impossible. Of course it isn't true._

Immediately, I felt perfectly fine.

_**Hitsugaya Tōshirō**_

After a while, I started to make my way back to tenth division, a little shakily. I was still in shock. I'd done what I could to show Hinamori that, despite what she may want to believe, this was _real. _We were going to _war_ against ex-captain Aizen. But she'd laughed like it was the most preposterous thing she'd ever heard.

_Aizen's fucked her up so badly…_

I started shaking with rage.

Then I froze when I heard a voice from around the side of the next building.

"You know that person laughing right outside our instruction session?"

"Yeah, what about it?" a second voice replied.

I vaguely recognized the voices of two non-ranking shinigami in the fourth company, Kiniro and Yōjin. The two were teenagers – about the shinigami age equivalent of Kurosaki and Inoue.

"It was _Hinamori," _said Yōjin.

"No shit?"

"No shit! Harada saw her; he said she was standing right outside, laughing her head off."

"At what?"

"That's the crazy part! There was nothing there to laugh at!"

"Woah…did anyone else see?"

"Well, apparently Hitsugaya was there, but Harada said he ran away when she randomly started laughing." Yōjin laughed himself. "I don't blame him! That girl is fucked in the head!"

I felt my hands curl into fists.

"It's not really her fault though," said Kiniro. "She's just been weird like that since Aizen ditched us."

"Yeah, well, she can fucking get over it! The rest of us are doin' fine."

"True—it's probably a good thing she was demoted, or—"

"Fuck that! They throw her right outta the Gotei 13!"

"I don't know about that."

"No way, man, she's done. Aizen's the only one who even wanted her in their division, anyway."

_That's not true…I wouldn't have minded if—_

"It's not like she even noticed, or cared," Yōjin continued.

"Wasn't Aizen like her idol or something?"

"Oh yeah, she followed him around everywhere, totally obsessed, like some mindless little bitch puppy. She'd have done anything for him." I practically heard his face break into a sick grin. "How much do you wanna bet she was screwin' him?"

_What?!?!?!?!?!?!_

"It would explain why she misses him so much, ha ha…"

"Dude, that's fucking sick," said Kiniro flatly.

"So what? It's not that crazy, is it? She's in obsession-type love with him, right? And he likes manipulating people, right? So he'd totally let her—"

_I'm going to be sick._

"That is so wrong," said Kiniro.

'What? I mean, she's pretty enough, too, right? I might do her if she were a little older…in a few years, she's gonna be a looker, you can tell." Yōjin paused. "'Course, she'd have to live that long first."

"What're you saying…?"

_Yes…do enlighten us._

"Well, she's obviously cracked—and crazy people are usually suicidal."

"Yeah, yeah, you're right! You know, at this rate, I'd give her about a month before she kills herself."

"Are you kidding? I bet you 500 yen that she doesn't make it through next week!"

"Ha ha! Okay, you're on!"

That was the last straw—I stepped out from around the corner. When Kiniro and Yōjin saw me, their cocky expressions slipped a little. I appraised them coolly.

"How would you feel," I said, "if Unohana-taichō came up to you two and stabbed you, with no warning whatsoever?"

"No way!" scoffed Kiniro. "She would never—"

I cut him off. "Well…maybe that's what Hinamori thought about Aizen. Maybe she felt safe with him, and thought she could trust him, even with her life. Maybe, just maybe, she has the right to be a little upset to have a bond like that stolen from her. So, maybe, you should think about things like that before you start shooting your mouths off about things about which you know _shit._"

To my chagrin, I had to look up at them a little as I delivered these words. But, as I walked away, radiating fury, they were silent, and I hoped they felt like complete assholes.

_**Hinamori Momo**_

The things I had seen – more so, the thoughts and emotions evoked by them – had frightened me, and, yet, I was drawn to return. Against my will, the next day found me at the cliffs again, staring down at the shinigami practicing their bladework. A part of me would not allow my eyes to be torn away, and so I watched, feeling that dreadful weight pressing in on me from all sides.

_Maybe this whole thing is just a precaution._

But I knew that couldn't be true. It wasn't logical…

…though I wanted it to be true so badly, because the alternative meant…

_…Aizen-sama…_

_They'll all be fighting Aizen-sama._

_And he'll be fighting back…_

_…fighting as…_

_…enemies._

_No! No, no!_

It was what everyone had been trying to tell me from the start, the thoughts I had been avoiding.

_Truth is relative to belief! I believe! I do!_

But the menace of the 'what if' rang through my head, a sinister chorus. Somehow, I couldn't hide anymore. Not even from my own thoughts.

_If I'm not safe inside my own mind…who can help me now?_

My legs collapsed from under me; burying my face in my hands, I burst into tears of despair.

After only a minute, though, I heard someone kneel down beside me, then I felt a hand on my shoulder.

"Stop it, okay? You know I don't like it when you cry."

"Tōshirō," I murmured in relief. I threw my arms around him and sobbed into his robes instead.

He stiffened, turning to unresponsive stone. "Hinamori…" he said awkwardly.

All I could manage was a sniffle in response.

"Hinamori, please stop crying."

I tried again. "T-Tōshirō—I'm s-s-sorry." I lifted my head to look him squarely in the eyes.

_**Hitsugaya Tōshirō**_

"I have to cry," she said. "I have to laugh, or cry, or do s-something – or else…I'm going to lose my mind, Tōshirō."

I looked in her eyes, and my heart leapt to see flickers in their dark-chocolate depths: flickers of grief, longing, confusion, fear. Flickers of the old Hinamori Momo.

They were quickly washed from view by a glaze of fresh tears, but, this time, I put one of my arms around her and let her cry on my shoulder.

_**Hinamori Momo**_

In those inexplicable moments—

_**Hitsugaya Tōshirō**_

--something between us changed.

_**Hinamori Momo**_

Or, perhaps, something that had always been there simply began to surface then. I only knew one thing –

_**Hitsugaya Tōshirō**_

--things would never be the same again.

_**Hinamori Momo**_

"Tōshirō…can I tell you something?"

From what I could tell, his voice held a not of concern. "What is it, Hinamori?"

"Promise you won't get mad?"

He paused. "Yeah…I promise."

"It's Aizen-sa---taichō."

He did not respond.

"You know how much he meant—means to me. He was more than a teacher and a friend – he's almost like a father to me. And it just hurts me that no one believes – and I think I might be starting to wonder – but I don't want –"

"I know," said Tōshirō, not unkindly.

Even as more tears traced their way down my face, I gave a short, bitter laugh. The sound scared me.

"That's not it," I said. "The thing is, Tōshirō – there's those who say all those things – and then there's you, of all people, right there beside them."

His ever-present guarded expression solidified. "What do you mean…me, 'of all people'?"

A lump sprang to my throat, rendering me mute.

"Hinamori…?"

I swallowed, blinking back yet more tears, and gathered my courage.

"Momo…?"

_Tell him! Just tell him!_

_**Hitsugaya Tōshirō**_

Nothing could have prepared me for the next words out of her mouth.

"A long time ago, when we were little," she said shakily, then stopped, taking a deep breath. Then she continued, and everything came crashing down.

"When we were little, Tōshirō --Aizen-sama saved your life."

**A/N:** Ha ha! A wonderful little cliffhanger for you! Now, review, or I won't update!

Just for the record, Yōjin, Kiniro, and the reference Harada are my OC'S. Well, sort of. They aren't really even characters…they're just crass, one-dimensional assholes, and they very likely won't ever be appearing in my works again. They did their job…to piss Tōshirō off enough to go back to Momo.

Hey, if you're interested, and while you're waiting for me to update (**if **I update! Mwaha!) you should check out my other Bleach fics. I have three they're all oneshots, and they are as follows:

**Paranoid Delusions**: Just a songfic of Yumichika being Yumichika in an extreme and borderline OOC manner. Set to the tune of Hedley's "Narcissist". It is random. It is stupid--really stupid. And you will laugh, guaranteed!

**Redemption: **It's actually a really long poem, but every verse is a haiku. Kind of sort of GinRan. (Just read it, you'll understand.)

**Matsumoto, Matchmaker: **What happens when the good-intentioned--but completely insane!-- Rangiku decides to play Cupid between Momo and Tōshirō...? Read and find out! This one was so much fun to write, and, again, you are guaranteed to laugh.

Okay, okay, I'll stop yammering. Here's what you're all reading this for:

**Next chapter preview****: **Well, obviously, Momo tells her story. And the HitsuHina element is further explored…but we also learn it is possible to care for someone too much…

Okay! So, review, or there won't _be _a next chapter! So, that's all for this week, at least. I'm outta here!

Hearts, stars and horseshoes!

~Raye Lynne^^


	10. Chapter 10: Wings of a Butterfly

**Chapter 10 – Wings of a Butterfly**

**A/N: **All right, people, we got ourselves a song in this chapter: "Possession" by Sarah McLachlan. Random, you say? Oh, not so, my friends! You will see…

Okay, thank you lists!!!

New reviewers: IcySnappDragon

New peeps who have fav'd this fic: Ree-kun, Xx Sykara xX

And subscribers (as I've stupidly neglected to thank them before): Ree-kun, Sam King, narutowolf, larkinlover, Azzn Sonar, Rikkufnl4, Tomas Hydraxus, and Schyzotypal X

Thank you also to Kazeek, who has been reading and pm'ing. (Which works just as well for me, people, --hint hint--!)

Okay! I know you don't really want to stick around here, so ON WITH THE STORY!!!

-------------------

_"It is said that it is possible for something as innocent as the flutter of a butterfly's wings to set in motion a chain of events that can unleash a tsunami on the other side of the world." –chaos theory_

_----------------------_

_**Hinamori Momo**_

_"A long time ago, when we were little, T__ōshirō --__Aizen-sama saved your life."_

_--------------------_

_Do you remember that day? That day many, many years ago? When we were but children, in mind as well as body…when the world we live in now didn't even seem a possibility…until that day._

_Tōshirō, do you remember? _

_That day when everything changed…_

_-------------------------_

_It was summer…warm, breathy breezes sang through the air, and the sun beamed through the trees, dappling the ground below with shadows that glided and danced with the movement of the branches; the atmosphere was permeated with the playful rustle of the leaves' viridian canopy in the wind._

_Ayumi and Tatsukichi and I were all playing, throwing a ball into the sky-- where it would hang for a moment, like a second sun, before falling, therein admitting defeat – then rushing to be the one to catch it, laughing and laughing, carefree in essence._

_"Come and play with us, Shiro-chan!" I called to you. But you shook your head, like you always did, and simply sat in the shade and watched._

_How different you looked, then – small and slight with messy, unkempt hair – but little else about you has since changed._

_I came over to you, anyway. "Why do you never play with us, Shiro-chan? We'd have so much more fun with you."_

_You looked over at Ayumi and Tatsukichi, who were laughing and playing as though I had never left their game. You replied, "I doubt it."_

_I was exasperated. "Why do you always have to act so cold? Like the world is so boring to you?"_

_"Who'd talking about the world? I just don't want to play ball."  
_

_'You never do!"_

_You shrugged. "I just don't see a point, that's all. Why even bother? Throwing…catching… over and over. It's meaningless."  
_

_"It's __fun."_

_"It's __stupid."_

_I stuck my tongue out. "Fine. If you're going to be that way, I 'm going to go play some more."_

_"Fine."_

_I sighed. "Always so cold…you're just like ice, Shiro-chan." I started walking away then, but a shudder spread through me, a cold, prickling chill that seemed to penetrate to the depths of my very soul, like nothing I'd ever felt before._

_"Shiro-chan, did you feel--?"_

_"Darn it, stop calling me that! I thought you were leaving."_

_"Tōshirō, something's not –"_

_And then your eyes went huge, staring in horror at something behind me. "Hinamori, get down!" you cried._

_With startling speed, you leaped up and tackled me. I was taken by surprise, and so fell._

_Something whistled over my head, and I felt the weight of your body lift before I heard a heart-stopping __crack.__ I twisted my neck to look back over my shoulder, and I cried out when I saw you slumped against the tree trunk, eyes closed, and blood streaking your hair where your head had knocked into the solid and unforgiving wood._

_Then I turned the other way, and my voice withered and died when I saw what stood before me._

_A Hollow._

_Of course, I knew about them; we all did, but in my short life, I'd had yet to ever see one._

_To say it was terrifying does not do it justice. The creature towered over me, thirty feet tall, its entire skeletal body rock-hard powerful muscle, hands and feet bearing talons six inches long. Its glowing red eyes leered down at me out of a thin, reptilian face; a crown of short – but no doubt razor-sharp – horns encircled his forehead. Like a whipcord, his long tail lashed out with lethal force and wrapped around me, crushing my ribcage and pinning my arms to my sides. I struggled, uselessly; it plucked me off my feet and dangled me in front of its horrible face. _

_Below, everyone in the park had fled, screaming. Ayumi and Tatsukichi were gone, too, run away like the rest. For that's what you did, if you were a civilian, when there was a Hollow, even if your friend had been taken. There was no point in helping: It would only get you as well._

_I kicked desperately, though I knew it would be useless. The Hollow opened its mouth to speak to me, revealing a long, forked tongue and glistening fangs._

_"Stay still, little girl," it hissed in its insectile voice. "There's no escape for you. So why don't you just relax and enjoy your last few seconds of being alive?"_

_I gathered enough air to shriek, and I kicked harder._

_The Hollow chuckled. "No matter. My paralysis-inducing venom will soon calm you down, whether you want to or not."_

_I looked up, the bulbous tip of his tail arched threateningly above me, its tip a needlelike stinger long enough to pierce me through._

"_N-no!" I gasped. Without warning, I felt a simmering heat building up deep inside of me, then it was suddenly released in a brilliant purple shockwave. The Hollow dropped me, howling, "It burns! It burns!"_

_I was suddenly exhausted, as though I'd just run ten miles. Somehow…__I'd__ made that energy burst._

_Then it hit me that the Hollow had let me go—__from nearly thirty feet up._

_I couldn't hold back a scream as the ground rose up to meet me._

_All my breath flew from my lungs when I landed, but, amazingly, I was unhurt. I was dazed – it took me a moment to realize that I had never hit the ground – someone had caught me, and I was nestled in a pair of strong arms._

_I was placed on my feet, but my knees had turned to jelly, and I could not stand; again, a pair of hands caught me, and carefully lowered me into a sitting position. I looked up, and beheld my rescuer for the first – and not the last – time._

_He was tall and broad-shouldered, with a white coat over his robes that marked him as a captain of the Gotei 13. A thick mass of unruly brown hair covered his forehead; a pointed chin and a squared-off jaw melded into a relatively young face that appeared not to have a care in the world. He was perfectly at ease; even his gold-flecked brown eyes, behind black-framed glasses, seemed to hold even a flicker of concern._

_"Are you al right?" he said to me, and his voice was warm and soothing._

_"Y-yes," I stammered._

_'Good," he said, and then he smiled, as though unbothered by the fact that the Hollow was still there, quickly recovering from the energy burst, narrowing its blood-drop eyes, and deciding when to spring…_

_"If you'll excuse me," the captain said, "I should probably deal with the issue at hand." Then he winked at me, as though we were sharing a joke. He turned to face the Hollow – I saw the 'go' kanji on the back of his haori then – and drew his zanpaku-tō._

_The Hollow hissed, "Looking for a fight, shinigami?"_

_"It does appear that's what it's going to come to, doesn't it?" the captain replied mildly. Raising his zanpaku-tō, he intoned, "Shatter, Kyōka Suigetsu." A shock wave seemed to burst from him, though not in the form of light, more like a ripple, as though a stone had been dropped in the water of the material world._

_The Hollow chuckled, "Too bad for you. I'm not in the mood to play. I will not be denied the right to sate my hunger."_

_The captain shifted his weight ever so slightly, so he was poised protectively in front of me, zanpaku-tō still at the ready. "You won't be taking this girl." How calmly he said it!_

_The Hollow laughed harder. 'Fool."_

_In an instant, I realized what it was going to do. "No!" I cried._

_The Hollow's tail lashed out, fast as lightning –_

_---but not at us._

_Instead, you, Tōshirō, were trapped in the coils, as limp as a broken doll._

_"Too late, little girl," the Hollow gleefully declared. "Adios, shinigami."_

_And then he bounded away in huge strides, getting further away with every step._

_I leapt to my feet. "No!" I screamed. "No! Tōshirō! Tōshirō!"_

_I would have run after you – I'd have freed you, somehow. I'd made that energy burst, after all…but no sooner had I taken a step forward than I felt the captain's hand on my arm, gripping me gently but firmly._

_"You have to stay here," he said._

_Tears were pouring down my face, and your name was the only thing I remembered how to say. "Tōshirō," I sobbed._

_"Your friend will be alright. I promise." He smiled as he said it, and I found it impossible not to believe him._

_With that, he was gone in a flash step, too fast for the eye to track._

_The waiting was the most terrible part of all. I was all alone in the park, and all was eerily still, as though even the wind was holding its breath. Every second seemed an hour, and each of those hour-seconds brought me more and more uncertainty, until such a long time – perhaps, in reality, a minute – had passed that I feared both you and your would-be rescuer to be dead._

_But, then, there he was, walking slowly towards me, smiling even through the blood that streaked his face and haori – and carrying you. You were still unconscious, but very much alive; I could see the slow rise and fall of your chest._

_My throat went dry with a sudden rush of relief—I'd never expected to see you again._

_The captain crouched down and carefully laid you on the ground, placing your head in my lap. I could only look back and forth between your face and his for a few seconds, then I finally locked eyes with him and rasped, "Th-thank you so much." The swords barely seemed adequate to express my gratitude, so I repeated them for good measure. "Thank you, Captain – ah…Captain--?"_

_"Aizen." He smiled benignly. "I'm Captain Aizen."_

_"Thank you…Aizen-sama."_

_His smile widened. "It's only my job." He grew more serious then, studying my face, as though trying to place it. "You're not one of our recruits, are you? What's your name?"_

_'I'm—Hinamori Momo. No, I don't belong to the Gotei 13."_

_The smile returned. "Not yet, anyway."_

_"What do you mean, Aizen-sama?"_

_"That reiatsu burst was quite impressive for someone your age."_

_"R-reiatsu? I don't have…reiatsu…"_

_"Only – you do, Hinamori-kun. Enough built-up reiatsu to release in a moment of extreme duress to cause a physical disturbance to that Hollow. And, remember…Hollows attack where the concentration of reiatsu is highest. They almost never attack children, unless…" he trailed off meaningfully._

_I could only stare at him, dumbstruck and blinking rapidly._

_Yet another smile from him. "I have to leave now…but I expect we'll meet again, Hinamori-kun."_

_With another wink and one last smile, he was gone._

_From then on, it became my goal to get as close to Aizen-sama as I could. Some years later, I became able to sense my own reiatsu, and so I left for shinigami training camp. When I came back for visits, I started to sense the reiatsu in you, too—providing further evidence as to why the Hollow attacked us that day, and explaining why the Hollow had been willing to settle for a 'normal' soul to eat. You wouldn't come to training, not at first. You never really liked my fascination with Aizen-sama. An 'obsession', you called it._

_I never told you that he saved your life, because I knew you wouldn't be happy. You always wanted to be the protector, and I knew how much it would hurt your pride to find out you'd been the protected. But, with your resentment of Aizen-sama, I'd always wondered if perhaps some part of you had suspected that something more had happened that day._

_But…he did save you, Tōshirō. And we've both since learned that kind of honour doesn't exist amongst all shinigami. He didn't have to save you. But he did._

_And I am where I am today because of that._

_So I don't see how…I can't understand…_

_There's truth in your words, Tōshirō. I realize that now._

_But it doesn't make sense…_

_Aizen-sama gave me everything that day, Tōshirō._

_My life…_

_…and yours._

_How can anyone who did something like that...be…_

_…evil? _

_**Hitsugaya T**__**ōshirō**_

___Holy shit._

With Momo's story… a lot of things made sense now.

True, Aizen didn't really have to save me, not technically. He knew damn well that it would better his reputation, though, making it harder for anyone to guess his true intentions.

_Bastard._

And, of course, he had no idea that he was saving a future Gotei 13 captain. But the thought that I owed my life to that son of a bitch was nauseating.

_Wait – I don't owe him anything. Seeing as he attempted to kill me three months ago, I should think the debt is paid._

I realized Momo was looking at me, waiting for me to say something.

"I understand," I said.

_Should I tell her? About after I found her in Central 46?_

"I'm so, so sorry, Hinamori."

"For what…?"

"What you're feeling…it must be terrible, all that confusion…"

I knew then that I couldn't tell her. Maybe it was the right thing for her to hear, but I knew it was more likely to destroy her inside.

She gave me a teary-eyed smile, then laid her head on my shoulder again. I could feel her shaking with a few final sobs.

I whispered in her ear, "Don't cry, Momo. It's okay."

There was another thing that was bothering me, though. According to Momo's story, she had seen Aizen release his zanpaku-tō into shikai.

_Is it possible that she's been under Aizen's hypnosis since the day she met him?_

When I thought about it, though, I realized it didn't matter.

Either way, Aizen's hold on Momo was weakening, coming to an end. This was the mark of a new beginning.

I reached up and let my fingers trail through Momo's hair, cool strands that wrapped around my hand, smooth and rich as water-silk.

_**Hinamori Momo**_

__I spent most of my time with Tōshirō after that.

It's not as though we planned it—but, every day, we met in the peach grove and walked from there. And we talked – about anything, reminiscing, like we hadn't talked since we were kids.

We would end up back at the peach grove, then sit for hours at a time, sometimes talking, but sometimes just sitting, and letting one another's company be enough.

Things were changing – that much I knew. Silence wasn't awkward anymore. Out of habit, I called him by his first name regularly, and he didn't complain; he was using mine more often, now, too. And when I looked into his eyes – their jaw-dropping turquoise – tremors of happiness and contentment shot through me.

That's all it started as. Little things, more of less insignificant on their own, but together – I wasn't so sure if the word 'friends' described us anymore.

_**Hitsugaya T**__**ōshirō**_

__One day, Momo decided to spend some time with Kira and Abarai. I didn't mind, especially since the two of them had been busy lately – Abarai had been assisting Kenpachi and Madarame, and Kira, and ex-fourth division member, had been working with Unohana-san to train new healers. (As for Momo's role, she'd (correctly) assumed she'd been placed in reserve; she was one of those who'd only be fighting if we suffered too many losses. The thought of fighting Aizen still upset her, and she was reluctant to talk about it.)

Anyway—I was feeling generous. Why shouldn't someone else get to revel in the long-missed sound of Hinamori Momo's laughter?

------------

Abarai approached me later.

"All Hinamori could talk about was how much you've been helping her," he said. "Now, I don't know what you've been saying to her, and I'm not asking to know. But, look – I'm asking as Hinamori's friend, okay? Whatever you're doing…just—don't stop."

_**Hinamori Momo**_

__"Don't you just love the smell of autumn, Tōshirō?"

"'The _smell _of _autumn'?"_

"Yes! It's all evergreens and blackberries and that kind of spicy smell of fallen leaves, mixed with a cold crispness in the air – of course, it's getting closer to winter now, so the cold part will be stronger – but, I'm saying –"

Tōshirō raised an eyebrow.

"Don't look at me like that! You mean you've never tried smelling autumn before?"

"…no…"

"So, try it! Oh, and you need to close your eyes for it to really work."

He rolled his eyes, but closed them, then inhaled deeply.

Immediately, his eyes flew open again, staring at me in surprise and wonder. "Wow," he said.

I laughed. "You see?"

"Yes." His mouth remained, as ever, a flat line, but something in his eyes danced in a smile. "Yes, I do."

_**Hitsugaya T**__**ōshirō**_

__One day, Momo was not at our usual spot.

As far as I knew, she didn't have plans with anyone else, so I waited for a little while. When she still didn't arrive, I went looking for her.

When I searched the cliffs – on the opposite side of those of the sparring plaza; these overlooked the area near the fifth division– I looked down and saw her, walking along the ravine –_hand in hand with Abarai!_

_"I'm asking a Hinamori's __friend…"_

_Yeah, right!_

Flames of resentment bloomed within me, threatening to boil over.

_Wait a minute…_

_…that's not Hinamori Momo!_

_That's Kuchiki Rukia…!_

_…oh._

_**Hinamori Momo**_

___Snow._

_Falling…soft, slow, silent._

_And I am not alone._

_"Hello, Hinamori-kun."_

_Aizen-sama…_

_He is smiling, and I am drawn to him, as ever._

_But I hesitate._

_T__ōshirō…where are you, Tōshirō?_

_Something's wrong…_

_Or is it that something isn't right?_

_Is it the same thing?_

_I look back at Aizen-sama, uncertain. "Where's Tōshirō?" I ask him._

_He smiles._

_And the snow flurries to surround me, and all I can see is pure, endless white._

_**Hitsugaya T**__**ōshirō**_

__I knocked on Momo's door.

"C-come in," came her sleepy-sounding voice.

I entered to find Momo sitting up in her bed, her hair a mess and her eyes bleary.

"You were still sleeping?" I asked, surprised.

"Yes…I've been having these dreams, all night." She paused. "Actually, it's been the same dream, over and over. I hoped that, if I kept sleeping, I would be able to figure out what it means." With a sigh, she added, "It still doesn't make any sense to me, though. Maybe you could help me…?"

"Sure; let's hear it."

"Well…it's snowing. And--Aizen-sama is there."

"That makes sense, though. Aizen will be coming in the winter."

"But it wasn't all of the Gotei 13 there to meet him; it was just me. But – the dream, you're in it, too. Except that your not, and you should be—" her voice rose part of an octave in her growing distress.

"It's okay, Momo. What are you trying to say?"

"In the dream, I have this feeling that you should be there, but you aren't. I don't know where you are, and I'm worried. And then everything gets whited out, and I can't really see anything – and then it starts all over again."

I was forced to admit, "I don't understand it, either. But I'll think about it, all right?"

Momo smiled – like most of her smiles lately, though it still held traces of sadness, it was genuine. Then she yawned and stretched, raising her arms over her head. On the way up, one of her arms caught the edge of her pillow, raising it partially. I caught a glimpse of a metallic gleam.

"What's under your pillow?"

"Nothing," she replied, too quickly. I looked at her pointedly. Blushing, she lifted it up again –

"You sleep with your lieutenant's badge _under your pillow_?"

__"Why not?" she protested.

_Hold on… "_How did you get it back, anyway?"

"Oh…Abarai-kun gave it to me."

_Abarai. _That reminded me of the misunderstanding of only minutes ago, and it was all I could do to keep my own face from reddening.

"You're not going to take it away again, are you?" she asked anxiously.

I shook my head, my attention focused on the piece of paper folded next to the badge. "What's that?"

"Just some kidō combinations I wanted to try sometime," she said, picking up the paper, unfolding it, and showing it to me. I caught glimpse of enough numbers and words to know she was telling the truth, but that was all, before she tore it from my line of sight. "No stealing my ideas," she scolded – with a smile, though.

"If you insist," I replied. "So – are you going to walk with me today?"

"Yes," she answered eagerly. "Just let me get dressed."

"Of course." I walked towards the door, then paused. "About your dream… perhaps, it really was just a dream, nothing more."

"I hope so," said Momo. "Because I don't know what I would ever do without you, Tōshirō."

_I don't know what I would ever do without you._

Ten words.

And yet, they quickened my pulse, sending a rush of heat throughout me. At the same time, little shivers of thrill seemed to skitter beneath my skin.

I didn't know whether to be scared or not.

But there was no denying what it meant. Emotion doesn't lie.

_One thing was certain. Things would never be the same again._

_**Hinamori Momo**_

__Only a sliver of sun remained, but enough to lengthen the shadows and bestow a glow of molten gold to the bare branches of the peach grove. Though most of the fruit had been harvested, a few round, ripe peaches still clung resolutely to the boughs. They looked odd, without their surrounding crown of leaves, which all lay on the ground, their rich green mottled by yellows and reds. The leeward side of the trunks glittered with a light coating of frost, and the twilight winds were cold. Autumn was coming to a close.

Tonight was one of those wonderful nights with Tōshirō when our silence seemed to say it all. As we watched the indigo pall of night creep towards the western horizon, I realized it was _almost_ perfect.

I turned to Tōshirō. "Do you think…something's missing?"

"I was thinking the same thing." He frowned pensively, then his eyes glittered in his own way of smiling. "I've got it." He carefully rose. "I'll be right back."

As I waited, the sun disappeared completely, with only a slender aura of red along the horizon before it filtered away into the blue.

Finally, Tōshirō came back, carrying a large container and an air of triumph. He sat down next to me and presented the box. "I'm surprised they still had any in the kitchens, but we were in luck."

"What are you--?" I tugged the lid off, and cried out excitedly, "Watermelon!" I eagerly picked out a thick slice and sank my teeth into the succulent pink fruit, savouring its slightly sticky sweetness. Tōshirō chose a piece for himself, and gently bit the point off.

I sighed contentedly. _Now _everything was perfect.

_**Hitsugaya T**__**ōshirō**_

_Listen as the wind blows  
From across the great divide  
Voices trapped in yearning  
Memories trapped in time  
The night is my companion  
And solitude my guide  
_

The silence had made the moment perfect just before – but now, it was unnerving. I glanced over at Momo, who was munching watermelon, without a care. A sharp pang shot through my stomach.

_Would I spend forever here  
And not be satisfied?_

What was this?__

And I would be the one  
To hold you down  
Kiss you so hard  
I'll take your breath away  
And after I'd wipe away the tears  
Just close your eyes dear  


It seemed so new…and yet I was sure it had been a long time in coming. But I didn't know how – to----

_  
__**Hinamori Momo**_

_Through this world I've stumbled  
So many times betrayed  
Trying to find an honest word  
To find the truth enslaved  
_

Was it really perfect, though?

Tōshirō and I –here, alone…

After all he'd done for me—he had helped me through the hardest time in my life, on top of his own responsibilities. He'd taught me to see, aided me with moving on, in a way that no one else but him could. When worst came to worst, he'd shielded me, supported me, and – quite literally – been my shoulder to cry on.

_Oh you speak to me in riddles and  
You speak to me in rhymes  
My body aches to breathe your breath  
You words keep me alive_

And, just now, with the watermelon – that moment of uncharacteristic sweetness and thoughtfulness –

--I loved him for it.__

And I would be the one  
To hold you down  
Kiss you so hard  
I'll take your breath away  
And after I'd wipe away the tears  
Just close your eyes dear

_**Hitsugaya T**__**ōshirō**_

I was completely unused to feelings such as these, and, having made a lifelong habit of never expressing my emotions, I had no idea how to handle this.

_Into this night I wander  
It's morning that I dread  
Another day of knowing of  
The path I fear to tread  
_

_**Hinamori Momo**_

_Oh into the sea of waking dreams  
I follow without pride  
_

I loved him for everything he'd one for me.

I loved him for the person he felt he could be around me.

I loved him for being there, for being a friend.

I loved him for it all.

I loved him.

_Nothing stands between us here  
And I won't be denied_

_**Hitsugaya T**__**ōshirō**_

__This was crazy! How was I supposed to deal with this? And, now, of all times?

For tomorrow was the start of the dreaded 'two weeks' before we were expected to go to war…

Momo…

_**Hinamori Momo**_

_And I would be the one  
To hold you down  
Kiss you so hard  
I'll take your breath away  
And after I'd wipe away the tears  
Just close your eyes dear_

Tōshirō got to his feet suddenly. "I—I should leave," he said awkwardly.

My heart caught in my throat when he started to walk away. I was frozen for a second, then I clamoured to my feet. "Wait!" I cried, my voice emerging from my throat more shrilly than I'd intended.

He turned back. "Is – something wrong, Momo?"

I could only stand there, as though I'd been turned to stone.

_I'll hold you down_

_Kiss you so hard_

_I'll take your breath away_

_"_Momo…?"

_And after I wipe away the tears_

"Momo, are you okay?" He started walking back to me.

_Just close your eyes_

I was possessed. Possessed by a benign entity, but one that made me lose all control.

I ran forward, and grabbed Tōshirō's haoriin both my fists. His eyes widened as I pressed myself close to him and kissed him deeply.

I fell away into a sweet and blissful oblivion.

_**Hitsugaya T**__**ōshirō**_

__I was taken entirely by surprise and every joint of mine locked in place for a split second. But then I realized – this was what I'd wanted all along.

Carefully, I placed my hands around Momo's waist, and I felt her relax. She gently slid her arms up to my shoulders, never once breaking contact. It was an incredible feeling, her soft warm lips against mine, and she tasted of watermelon's sweet, rich flavour. All thought was erased from my mind, and I was surrendered to the feeling of the moment.

But, when my thinking re-engaged, I was pierced through by a jolt of horror.

_No! What am I doing?! This can't happen!_

For the first time ever, my heart had been ruling my actions. But now, my head was back in control.

I moved my hands up to Momo's shoulders--and shoved.

_**Hinamori Momo**_

__Tōshirō had allowed our kiss to last for so long, I'd thought he was enjoying it. So I was doubly shocked when he suddenly and viciously pushed me away.

"No," he said softly.

"Tōshirō…?"

His gaze was locked with the ground. "My reputation as a captain is at stake here, Hinamori. I can't be seen acting so irresponsibly, during such a desperate time – especially not with _you."_

A huge lump formed in my throat. "What _about_ me?" I managed to whisper.

"You're Aizen's ex-lieutenant, dummy! If anyone sees me with you, they may doubt my loyalty to Soul Society."

Each of his words was like a needle that shot through my heart with excruciating accuracy. "No…you know it's not like that anymore, Tōhsirō."

"That's 'Hitsugaya-taichō' to you," he snapped.

I was thrown by his harshness. "No…"

"You should leave."

I swallowed. "No, Tōshirō – you're all I have right now. Please, please – don't you abandon me, too."

"Get out of here!" he snarled, impaling me with a glare. "Stay away from me!"

Making no attempt to suppress my violent sobbing, I fled, and it was like dying all over again.

_**Hitsugaya T**__**ōshirō**_

__Of course I'd lied, rather than say what I was really feeling. Old habits die hard, and it had been as though my mind had reached for some invisible switch and, _click, _shut off all my emotions.

My words had had, more or less, the effect I'd wanted, though I'd have given anything not to make her cry like that…and when she'd begged me not to abandon her, I wanted more than anything to shrug it off, say it was a stupid joke, and forget all about it.

_If only I'd…_

_…no. It's better this way._

The truth was simple. With how much she'd been depending on me as of late, and how she obviously cared for me – mirroring my feelings for her – it was the only answer, what with the impending war.

The war was the problem. We would soon be battling against hundreds of thousands of Arrancar, and all ten of the elite Espada, not to mention Tōsen, Ichimaru, and Aizen himself. I'd long ago had to accept the possibility that I may not survive.

If I died – Momo would be devastated. The closer I let myself get to her, the worse it would be for her if I failed to live through the battle. So it was best to chase her away before things could get too far.

Fuck, I wish I hadn't had to hurt her like that. But, if I told her the truth, she'd say that it didn't matter, that she'd be okay, etc., etc. But she would be lying. If worst came to worst – she'd be destroyed. And I wouldn't stand for that.

_She may be upset now – but she'll be all right. She recovered from Aizen's betrayal – she'll get over me._

_But I've been selfish…what if I've already kept her too close for too long?_

_What if it's too late?_

I wrestled with that thought, succeeding finally in defeating it, and locking it away in the dark recesses of my mind, where it could never again cross my consciousness—frozen into silence.

Just like ice.

_"You're just like ice, Shiro-chan."_

I almost laughed at the bitter irony.

_Like ice – _I was so cold. Standing there, staring at the ground, I felt nothing but the increasing cold. Above me, a maelstrom of iron-coloured clouds silently amassed, imprisoning the light of the stars.

_So cold –_

Icy reiatsu started to leak from the pores of my skin, forming in cold, swirling eddies of air around me, before slowly spiraling up into the clouds.

_My eyes – what's happening to my eyes?_

My vision was blurred…then it cleared suddenly, and something warm and wet trickled down my face. I held out my hand, and two teardrops landed, in raid succession, on my upturned palm.

I shivered.

Something else was falling, too. Fat white clusters of icy crystals approached the earth, falling softly, slowly, silently.

It was snowing.

------------

A/N: Phew! Okay, that was a hard chapter. But, hours of blood, sweat, and tears later, here it is, for your eyes only.

All right, so, another cliffhanger for you guys! Except it's artistic and subtle this time, so yay, go me, all that jazz^^

Just for the record, Ayumi and Tatsukichi are Momo's old friends from when she lived in Rukongai. If you go and read Bleach -15 (that's Tōshirō's personal oneshot in honour of his movie, _The DiamondDust _Rebellion) on onemanga, you'll see. Or, you can just read it anyway. It's good; it's amazing, because it is our beloved Shiro-chan, after all^^

"_But, then, there he was, walking slowly towards me, smiling even through the blood that streaked his face and haori…" _that sentence amused me, even though it came from my own head. Of course he was smiling! He's a disgusting sadist! He's probably not happy if his clothes aren't bloodstained! Ew, DISGUSTING CREEPER RAT BASTARD ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRGH!!!

Okay!

**NEXT CHAPTER PREVIEW!!!!!**

All I'm going to say is this: If you thought this chapter was bad, then you are going to want to kill me when you read chapter 11. For this was not the tsunami, my friends. Oh, no! That was merely the fluttering of the wings of a butterfly.

**AND PLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEASE REVIEW!!!!**

~Raye Lynne


	11. Chapter 11: Skyrender

Chapter 11: Skyrender

A/N: Hiya again! Short chapter alert, just to warn you…and I apologize in advance for my terrible Japanese! All translations are very _very _literal, so that probably means they're wrong. Please don't be offended by my ignorance

Thank you, thank you, new reviewers (Ree-kun and Kinaia)! And to my latest subscriber, Kaus-y! Yay, it totally makes my day to see the numbers growing and growing…

All kidō spells that are in this chapter, I made up. Hopefully, there are no conflicts with the numbers and any existing kidō created by Kubo-sama.

Oh, and there are not one, but two songs in this chapter: first, "Cloud Nine" by Evanescence (LOVE them!) and then "After All" by Delirium.

Okay! Enough banter; I'm sure you're all waiting to know what happens next so ON WITH THE STORY!!!!!

------------------

"_If I smile and don't believe/Soon I know I'll wake from this dream"—_"Hello" by Evanescence

-------------------

_If you want to live, let live  
If you want to go, let go  
I'm not afraid to dream _

_To sleep, sleep forever  
_

How could he have done this to me?

_I don't need to touch the sky  
I just want to feel that high  
And you refuse to lift me  
_

It was only a kiss! And he kissed me back, too!

Before he pushed me away…

_  
Guess it wasn't real after all  
Guess it wasn't real all along  
_

Oh, Tōshirō…

_If I fall and all is lost  
It's where I belong_

Tōshirō, Tōshirō…

_"That's 'Hitsugaya-taichō__, to you."_

Why?

He'd spent all this time, trying to help me, so he said.

That means he had to have cared.

About me.

If you want to live, let live  
If you want to go, let go

I'd thought that it meant maybe, just maybe…

_  
I'm never gonna be _

_Your sweet, sweet surrender  
_

…he'd loved me, too.

_  
Guess it wasn't real after all  
Guess it wasn't real all along  
If I fall and all is lost  
No light to lead the way  
Remember that all alone  
Is where I belong_

In the past weeks, I'd depended on him so much.

"_Stay away from me!"_

Everyone else had responsibilities.

Except for Tōshirō.

He'd made _me_ his responsibility.

Helping me, healing me.

But now, he'd hurt me.

He'd let me go.

_"Please…don't let me go."_

_"I would never…Momo."_

He'd lied.

What if…?

In a dream  
Will you give your love to me  
Beg my broken heart to beat

…that wasn't the only thing he'd lied about?

_Save my life  
Change my mind  
_

…Aizen-sama…?

_  
If I fall and all is lost  
No light to lead the way_

Everyone else had responsibilities.

Tōshirō was gone.

_  
Remember that all alone  
Is where I belong_

I'd never been alone before.

Ever.

I'd always had _someone…_

But now…

Not now.

There was nowhere to turn.

I was alone, being swallowed up in the darkness, and falling, falling…

…because he'd let me go.

"You're a liar!" I screamed through my tears. "A liar, that's what you are, Hitsugaya Tōshirō! A cold-blooded – heartless – heart-breaking – _liar," _I sobbed.

I felt an agonizing ache within me, as though my heart were being physically broken.

He'd hurt me.

Because he was a liar.

Liars lie.

About lots of things…

Aizen-sama.

I crawled across my futon to my pillow, reached under, and withdrew two things: my badge, and the small slip of paper.

I looked at the badge first. I could see my face in it. Red, blotchy, streaked with tears.

I put it down.

I looked at the paper, with its series of kidō spells. I read the spells once, twice.

I smiled.

I'd made my decision.

-----------------

_One element, flowing into the next, flawless, effortless._

_A medley._

_A dance._

_Let your will guide you, and anything is possible._

_I knew what I wanted, and willed it to be so._

_Guided by burning desire, I began my dance._

_A whole new world lay before me…_

_…_literally.

-------------------

_  
__She knows the voices in her mind  
They tell her  
To leave_

That day, I'd discovered how to create portals without the aid of a physical key of some sort, as was required normally.

Why I'd been trying to make a portal, I hadn't known. But, somewhere, in the darkest corners of my forgotten dreams, I had likely suspected that this day would come to pass.

_She's tired of smiling madly  
Until silence becomes very silently  
A noise in her mind_

I'd experimented, eliminated.

When I'd found the correct sequence, I'd written them down, knowing I would need them, but not when or why.

Until now, that is.

_After all she has nothing inside  
No good to give  
No meaning to live  
The mist engulfed tonight  
Every single star_

I had everything that I needed.

I was ready to leave.

_After all they shared  
How could he simply say no__?  
After all they shared  
He turned away from her to go  
She said she wouldn't cry  
That was really just a lie_

I tied my badge firmly back onto its rightful place on my upper arm, grabbed the sheet of paper, and stood resolutely in the centre of my room—trying to suppress all the pain, and all thought and emotion with it.

_She knows the noises in her mind  
Nothing's left but  
Screaming silence_

"Bakudō 48: tokuketa [column shield]."

A circular shaft of blue light sprang from the floor around my feet and rapidly shot upwards, disappearing into the ceiling. Such a shield, I had learned long ago, was impenetrable from the inside as well as out, and such quarantine was necessary.

"Bakudō 86: shikaku kagiri-no-nai [vision unrestricted]."

This was an interesting spell that could be used in battle to see hints of your opponent's intents in visible forms around them. But, like most kidō, it had other, lesser-known effects as well. I could now see the entire floor aglow with rippling streams of light, constantly shifting and changing. These were the seams between this world, this dimension, and all others.

I waited until the one I wanted passed into the column. I wasn't able to tell by looking, but I felt a pull towards one seam, one rift, and one only –

_After all she feels numbness inside  
The feeling's gone  
She's upside down  
_

"Bakudō 98: toki hyōketsu [time freeze]."

Within the shield, the seams ceased their dance. Around me, the others continued to shimmer and bend, but these weren't important to me.

Time freezes don't last long, so I had to act quickly. I couldn't turn back now.

_The pictures behind her closed eyes  
This time you went too far_

Not that I wanted to turn back. There was nothing left for me here.

_After all they shared  
How could he simply say no__?  
After all they shared  
He turned away from her to go  
She said she wouldn't cry  
That was really just a lie_

"Hadō39: gōruden byayan [golden light arrows]."

Twenty globes of light formed above my outstretched palms. I dropped my hands, and they shot off in different directions. Once they hit the side of the column, they bounced off, ricocheting in a new direction. Every time they impacted, their speed gradually increased. I could see the globes knocking into the column into a square shaft, and the light turned from a soft blue to a brilliant, blinding white.

_After all she has nothing inside  
No good to give  
No meaning to live  
The mist engulfed tonight  
Every single star_

Crouching, I placed my hands on the seam I wanted. Drawing in a deep breath, I intoned, "48, 86, 98, 39 – together, you are hadō 101: arusorasakeru [skyrender]."

A burst of light flared under my hands, and a shockwave rippled out to the corners of the shaft, before dissipating as it struck the sides. The square beneath me was now black; a pit of pure darkness and nothingness.

I was struck by a pang of fear, like a white-hot needle through my stomach.

_After all they shared  
How could he simply say no__?  
After all they shared  
He turned away from her to go  
She said she wouldn't cry  
That was really just a lie_

But I wasn't falling; I was rising, and the walls of the shaft were closing in, pressing my arms to my sides, burning…

I couldn't move; I couldn't breathe.

Bit I suppressed my fears deep down, and let the old feelings return, wiping my mind blank, comforting me, an intoxication I lusted after.

_Aizen-sama…_

_…I'm coming._

_--------------_

A/N: Yay! New chapter!

What? You mean you're mad?

You know that it's not a good story unless we make things a little more interesting. Don't you trust me?

Oh, and larkinlover; please, please, don't beeyotch slap Momo. Resist the urge! I made her do it, after all…

And we'll just see what I make happen in the next installment, won't we? Only I haven't actually finished writing it yet, so I can't give you a preview this time. Sorry…

Hang in there, though! And in the meantime, review! Or subscribe! Or fav, or pm or whatevs, I'm not picky^^

See you next chapter and maybe I'll earn a bit of redemption in your thoughts…

…or, maybe not!

Byez!

~Raye Lynne


	12. Chapter 12: Leap of Blind Faith

**Chapter 12: Leap of Blind Faith**

A/N: I have decided to make a point of thanking ALL my reviewers for every chapter, because they make me happy just as much as the new people do. So, HUGE THANK YOUs to: Agent-G, narutowolf, larkinlover, Ree-kun, and Full Shadow Alchemist. THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU!!!! I know I say this like all the time, but it totally makes my day to see your comments, and you can't know how much your opinion means to me…especially when it's good! (what, I'm not gonna lie!)

And huge thanks to XemnasSamnex for both subscribing to and fav-ing this story!

Note: Skalag, Scarran, their zanpaku-tō, and hadō 46 are mine! Mine!!!! Please don't steal.

Again, apologies, my Japanese is terrible (I used an online translator, and there were about fifteen definitions for 'field' so I pretty much picked one at random…) and I don't speak Spanish, either. So forgive and enjoy anyway!

------------------------------------------

"_There's a Ferris Wheel/A miracle, that circle of steel/It's funny how nervous/It's making me feel/Yet willing to ride" –from "Willing to Ride" (Steel Pier)_

_-------------------------------------------_

_**Hinamori Momo**_

I didn't remember closing my eyes, but, when I opened them, it was like waking from a long night's sleep.

I was standing in a long, cavernous hallway hewn from glittering white stone. The floor was tiled in polished black and white that formed structured, mandala-like designs. Carved marble pillars bloomed from the floor to the high, flat ceiling. The air was cool, despite the torches that flickered in their wrought-iron brackets, casting a ghostly blue glow about the area.

Every twenty feet or so, there was an opening in the wall, not so much a window as a vertical rectangular slash. Looking out, I saw the sun illuminating the minute flecks of glass-like stone scattered amongst the pure white sand, which stretched on and out as far as the eye could see – a lifeless plain, empty but for the glittering crystal shards in the sand. All this was domed by a sky that was completely unblemished by clouds and seemed almost too blue, too flawless.

"So this is Hueco Mundo," I murmured to myself, allowing the foreign name to linger on my tongue.

"And you're not welcome here," hissed a serpentine voice in my ear.

I cried out in surprise and spun around to face not one, but two of the most terrifying creatures I've ever beheld.

The one who stood slightly further back was tall and slender, with a solemn, morose face, half of which was covered by a mask of bone, only slightly paler than his skin. Light grey hair fell past his shoulders, and his one visible eye was a dull silver. He was clothed in a simple ivory-coloured robe trimmed in black at the edges. His hands were the most frightening—his nails were bone-white and at least four inches long, filed to razor-sharp points.

The one closer to me, presumably the one who had spoken, was slightly shorter, but far more muscular and powerfully built. His lower jaw was encased entirely in a layer of bone with two lethal fangs curving upwards. He wore loose-fitting pants of the same material as the other's robe, but no shirt. Around his torso coiled a tattoo of a monstrous cobra that wound around his chest and arms before continuing up the back of his neck; the head of the creature was imprinted on his bald scalp, giving the chilling impression that his head was clutched I the maw of the serpent. As well, there was a gaping, perfectly round hole in the middle of his abdomen.

"You're…Arrancar?" I said, half-questioning myself.

The nearer one grinned. "Indeed – yo soy Arrancar ciento-ocho [108]: Skalag del Crimslagh."

The other said, "Arrancar ciento-nueve [109]: Scarran Yomeng." His voice was completely flat and expressionless, with no trace of emotion or inflection whatsoever.

"And you," Skalag said, "are…a shinigami?" His grin told me he knew perfectly well what I was, and he was only mocking my previous uncertainty.

"A lieutenant," Scarran coolly noted.

Skalag's reddish eyes flashed hungrily. "Really?" he said slowly, taking another step closer. "And what would a shinigami lieutenant be doing here in Las Noches?"

_'Las Noches'? Doesn't that mean 'Castle of Night'? _It seemed an odd name to me, what with ferocity of the sun outside.

"I-I'm here to see Aizen-sama," I answered.

"Ah!" said Skalag. "So you already know his title. Interesting what you already seem to know…"

"That's what I've always—"

"Aren't you a little young to be an assassin?" asked Skalag.

I gaped in shock. "But I'm not—how can you say--?"

"You won't be seeing Aizen-sama," said Scarran softly.

"You won't be seeing anyone," Skalag giggled maniacally.

My head was spinning. "No, wait – you don't –"

"I'm surprised that Soul Society would send a child," said Scarran. "Perhaps they thought we would show mercy."

Skalag laughed. "Fools."

Not a trace of a smile graced Scarran's expression. "Indeed."

I quickly tried to explain. "I'm not an assassin! I left Soul Society, and I want to come and stay here. And I –"

"Sorry," grinned Skalag. "We don't believe you."

With lightning speed, he unsheathed his zanpaku-tō, and Scarran did the same, slowly and deliberately. The blades gleamed I the torchlight as the slowly advanced towards me.

"No, wait!" I cried. "It's true; just take me to see Aizen-sama, he'll know who I am; I'm his lieu—"

"You cannot possibly be a threat to the revered Aizen-sama," said Scarran. "But you are a nuisance. And you are our enemy. And therefore you must be dealt with – removed, as it were." His slow, monotonous cadence sent shivers down my spine.

These two would kill me without even blinking, and wouldn't even grace my death with another thought.

Skalag lunged.

I dove to the side, hitting the cold tiled floor and rolling. I leapt to my feet and drew Tobiume from its sheath, just in time to block another attack from Skalag. I parried and whirled to one side, only to be forced to backstep by Scarran, who had appeared beside me. Gathering my energy, I performed a shun-po around them, then aimed my zanpaku-tō in their direction.

"_Snap, Tobiume!"_

A sphere of purple light appeared at the end of the blade and rapidly expanded, shooting off towards the two Arrancar. They both dodged, and the sphere crashed into the wall, exploding and sending a spiderweb of cracks through the rock; small sharp chips of stone assailed my opponents.

"So the little shinigami wants to play," hissed Skalag. "Then we'll play. _Ensnare, Cobraespina [_Bone Cobra]."

Scarran stood and calmly appraised his companion as he stretched and shifted into the shape of an enormous white snake; jagged black shapes covered his back, and the designs on the creature's hood were the colour of blood. I could only watch in horror. Even in this form, Skalag seemed to grin at me, his hideous curving fangs dripping venom.

With astounding speed, he snapped at me, and I barely had time to spin away; even so, his scales rubbed against my robes, their razor-sharp edges shredding the material of the sleeve and leg on the left side.

Once again, Scarran was there to block me. Now, I was dangerously close to the wall. I could guess at their strategy: once Scarran had me cornered, Skalag would lunge and end the fight.

Unless I fought back.

"Hadō 11: Tsuzuri Raiden!" I shouted. Gleaming silver chains lashed out and wrapped around Skalag. I ran around his other side; he struggled to turn and snap at me again, but I made sure the chains held. Already, though, I was feeling the drain on my reiatsu from restraining the monstrous creature.

Right away, Scarran was behind me, slashing with his zanpaku-tō. I dropped into a crouch to avoid it; the tip of his blade snatched the swatch of cloth that covered my hair, tearing it away. My hair spilled over my face, partially blinding me. I saw him swing again, and I brought my blade up to block, but his blow glanced off and drew a red line across my shoulder; the pain briefly flared to the surface, then shrank back to a muted burning.

Immediately, he struck again, and I was forced to block. The power behind his strokes jarred my shoulders on impact.

His strength and speed were astounding. I was already beginning to tire – the kidō I had cast to arrive here had taken their toll on my energy to begin with.

But I couldn't lose. They would kill me, and I would never get to see Aizen-sama again, even though I was so close…

I tossed my hair from my eyes, then lunged, feinting to the right, then spinning around at the last minute, succeeding in dragging Tobiume's edge along the line of his collarbone.

For once, Scarran's face showed some expression – his one visible eye widened in surprise as he took in the blood that was slowly seeping through his white robes. He brought his hand up to the cut, and his fingers came away glistening red.

His eye narrowed.

"Enough of playtime," he hissed, his voice suddenly fuelled with venom. "This ends now." He leveled his zanpaku-tō and commanded, "_Snarl, lobo plata_. [silver wolf]"

All at once, a wolf with shaggy silver fur and huge teeth stood before me. Even all fours, it was nearly as tall as me, and Scarran's nails had transformed into saber-like claws.

He sprang; I dodged; he hit the floor again and slid, his claws scraping across the tiles. It only took him a split second to regain his footing, however, and he leapt at me again, claws outstretched and fangs bared in a snarl. I hadn't expected him to recover so quickly; I staggered back.

Though Skalag was restrained, he managed to whip out his tail – the only part of him free to move – and knocked me backwards. I hit the ground and rolled, but Scarran was upon me, gouging five razor-sharp talons into my back, and I screamed. I managed one more half-roll, and then his claws wrapped loosely around my throat. One twitch of his paw and my life was over…

"Hadō 56: sekiryoku gobannome [repulsion field]!" I cried. A spherical shockwave burst from me, and Scarran flew backwards and crumpled to the ground. I was on my feet again in an instant, but I was winded—it had taken so much energy to throw him off…

Scarran got to his feet, but more slowly than before; he was obviously injured. For a single second, I had the advantage, and I used it.

"_Tobiume!!" _I cried, and I watched as the purple ball formed between the three prongs of my zanpaku-tō and launched itself at the struggling wolf, impacting and smashing him back into the wall. Scarran slid to the floor and lay still; some of his fur was streaked in red.

Skalag shrieked in fury and whipped his tail at me again. Calling Tobiume back into sealed form, I struck out, severing the last two feet of his tail. I was sprayed with black blood, sticky and warm, and I tried hard not to blanch. Skalag struggled, now powerless, and shrieked again, opening his jaws. A glowing ball of light was forming on the back of his tongue –

_A 'cero', _I realized.

And then the ball exploded towards me, pure light and heat and energy.

I brought Tobiume up; the cero hit the tip and split, instead swirling around me; I could feel its intense heat as it passed.

But it hadn't hit me.

After the cero had passed, however, I became aware of another reiatsu – one I recognized.

Before I could react, though, I felt a hand clutching my shoulder and cold steel pressed against my throat.

The pressure lifted for an instant, and the hand spun me around, so I was face-to-face with – _Ichimaru-taichō!_

"You!" I shouted, seized by a boiling rage. Before I could raise my zanpaku-tō, Ichimaru-taichō casually flicked his wrist, bringing the tip of Shinsō to rest under my chin.

"Well, well, well," he smirked. "Hinamori-chan! I thought it was you – but you understand my doubts, of course. You were quite dead when I last saw you, after all."

I was trembling with fury. "Apparently not," I said quietly.

"Indeed, yes! I did think killing you was a bit harsh, what with your years of service and you being little more than a child, but…" he shrugged.

"I want to see Aizen-sama," I said flatly.

"Yes, yes! I'm sure he would be very _interested_ in seeing you, too, so just sheath your zanpaku-tō, and we'll go."

Only when I returned Tobiume to my side did Ichimaru-taichō remove his blade from my throat, and, after a moment's pause, sheathed it as well. I noticed he was wearing the same robes as Scarran. Wrapping his hand around my upper arm, making my skin crawl, he led me through the halls of the castle, which seemed to make up an enormous maze – as far as I could tell, each passage was exactly the same as the last. Strangely, they all seemed to be deserted.

No sooner had this thought crossed my mind then we encountered Tōsen-taichō, who stopped.

His blind eyes stared, unseeing, from behind their translucent glasses. He frowned. "Hinamori—is it you?"

"Y-yes." My throat was dry. Tōsen-taichō – he had always seemed so wise to me. Surely, he was a victim of Ichimaru-taichō's cunning ruthlessness as well…he was wearing the robes, too, only his had no sleeves, revealing muscular arms with skin the colour of freshly sown earth.

"But how—" I felt he was going to ask something else, but instead he said, "How did you come here?"

"I made a portal. With kidō."

Tōsen-taichō nodded thoughtfully. "Interesting." He paused. "You were just in a fight." It wasn't a question. He was silent again; I could feel him reaching out with his reiatsu, trying to detect something.

"Arrancar one-oh-eight and one-oh-nine," he finally said. "You defeated them."

Ichimaru-taichō laughed. "You've got the wrong numbers, Tōsen. There's no way she could have beaten two of the 'fallen espada'."

'_Fallen espada'…_I racked my memory, trying to recall.

_Fallen espada…Arrancar who used to hold the title of 'espada', elite, before being replaced._

That meant they had to be powerful

And I'd won against…_two_ of them?

_Well, they're not dead._

_But, if Ichimaru-taichō hadn't been there, they would have been , within a minute or two._

'I am not mistaken," said Tōsen-taichō calmly.

"But that's impossible!" Ichimaru-taichō protested.

"It would seem not…where are you taking her now?"

"Aizen-sama will want to know about this – and you miss your captain ever so much, don't you, Hinamori-chan?"

My only answer was a glare.

"Perhaps I should come as well," Tōsen-taichō said.

And we walked through the halls again, with me flanked between the two men, although Tōsen-taichō did not grasp my arm.

Finally, we reached a set of vast double doors, unadorned but for a silver handle set into each one.

Suddenly, I staggered. Behind those doors was the reiatsu the equivalent of which I'd never sensed before. My heart sped up; I found it difficult to breathe. The wounds I'd received in the fight, bearable until now, began to throb painfully. This presence was so powerful, it was nearly suffocating, and it seemed to threaten to crush me. And it was so alien in its concentration – but it was familiar to me, all the same.

Noticing my discomfort, Ichimaru-taichō snickered. "Too much for you?" he mocked.

I stood up straight, refusing to be provoked, but I could not soften the almost painful hammering of my heart as Tōsen-taichō pushed open the doors.

I was led into the only room that was different in any way. The stone, the pillars, and the tiles were the same, but the ceiling was infinitely higher, and a mass of points, arches, and buttresses. The far wall was a jumble of long, rectangular blocks of the same white stone. Though there were windows, the blue torchlight dominated the vicinity.

This was all I was able to see before Ichimaru-taichō shoved me to the floor. Taken by surprise, I gave a small cry as my hands and knees hit the cold tiles.

Captains Ichimaru and Tōsen knelt, too, one on either side of me; Ichimaru-taichō retook his hold on my arm.

I was confused. _What's going on? What is this?_

And then I looked up.

The jumble of blocks I had thought only seconds ago to be randomly placed revealed themselves to be an intricate series of stone steps carved right out of the wall. At the top of these steps stood a blocky marble throne, and seated there was Aizen-sama.

I did not recognize him immediately; he looked so different! I could tell he'd lost weight since arriving here; his cheekbones now pressed lightly against the inside of his skin and his jawline was sharper, more defined. His glasses were gone, and all his hair was pushed off his face, save for a single piece that trailed over his forehead. He, too, wore the same black-trimmed white robes; over this he wore a loose-sleeved coat of the same material and a red obi around his waist.

"Gin, Kaname…? I did not summon you," he said sternly.

Tōsen-taichō bowed his head. "We are sorry to intrude, Aizen-sama. However, we've had an – arrival."

Aizen-sama's eyes came to rest on me, trailing over my tangles hair, my shredded robes, the blood that covered me, and – finally – the badge still tied to my arm.

"Hinamori-kun?"

"Y-yes, Aizen-tai--- I mean, Aizen-sama," I stammered.

He said, "Gin, I do not think that she is so injured that she cannot support herself."

Ichimaru-taichō released my arm as quickly as if he'd been scalded. "Of course, Aizen-sama."

Aizen-sama's eyes never left me, and there was silence. The tension levels in the room rose and my heart beat even faster.

Finally, he spoke again, without averting his gaze.

"Kaname, Gin – you may go."

"Forgive us for not immediately obeying your command, Aizen-sama," said Tōsen-taichō, "but we are not certain that you should be left alone with Hinamori, as she may be here to make an attempt o your life."

"Ridiculous. You would never do a thing like that, would you, Hinamori-kun?" He smiled, already knowing the answer.

"N-no, never!"

"Then that's settled. Both of you – go, now. You are dismissed."

Ichimaru- and Tōsen-taichō rose, bowed, and backed out of the room, their every footstep echoing off the walls. When the doors closed, it was like a roll of thunder.

And then we were alone.

Rising from his throne, Aizen-sama slowly and deliberately made his way down the steps. He stopped before me, and I wondered for a dazed moment why he was so much taller, when I remembered that I was still on my knees.

Silently, he bent and took my hand, guiding me into a standing position. The gashes in my back suddenly flamed with pain, and I stumbled forward. He gently caught me by the shoulders and set me back on my feet, with ease, as though I weighed nothing.

_Why do I feel like something is missing?_

"What's happened to you, Hinamori-kun?"

_That voice…I've missed that voice…_

"I fought…with two of the Arrancar."

"I though I sensed a disturbance…which numbers?"

"One-oh-eight and one-oh-nine."

"And…you won?"

"Yes." A terrible thought crossed my mind then. "They thought I was an assassin – and they were going to kill me, and they wouldn't let me explain, so I fought them, but – I hope it's not a bad thing for you that I did. I mean, I hope it's not inconvenient. They're not dead," I added hastily.

"No, no, never mind them. They're rather – expendable." Placing his hand on my shoulder, he gently turned me around. He lightly fingered the gashes on my back, and, again, they were shot through with a sharp, burning pain. My breath caught in my throat and I bit my lip to keep from gasping.

"We'll have to get those taken care of," he murmured. "But—what's important is that you came back, just like I hoped you would.

"You see, Hinamori-kun, what I put you through, on the day I last saw you – it was nothing more than a test. I would have wanted to take you with me, but only the most loyal were allowed to join in this endeavor.

"My supposed death was the first part of the test. The second, well – it was the harder, for the both of us, I'm sure. But I've sensed the potential in you since the day we met, and I was certain that you could withstand a test to that extreme. And you've remained loyal to me through it all, Hinamori-kun. You've proven yourself to me, and therein passed. I never had any doubts about you…but, you understand, don't you?"

"Yes; yes, of course."

"_The second…was the harder, for the both of us…"_

He hadn't wanted to hurt me.

'But…why did you want to leave, Aizen-sama?"

He smiled, and, in doing so , filled me with warmth.

"Envision, if you will, a world where Hollows and shinigami can live in harmony. No more fighting – no more death – no more fear. All are equals, ruled under one single power. With the Hogyōku, everyone can, more or less, be a living compromise – a living balance. Shinigami-Hollow hybrids. Everyone will be equal, united under one set of law and a single society. There'll be no more pain, no more, war, no more suffering – it's wonderful, isn't it?"

"Yes—it is. A peaceful world…"

"Exactly. I left in order to bring this world about."

"But what about Ichimaru-taichō and Tōsen-taichō?"

"They were my co-conspirators, assisting me with this plan from the start. So, of course, they came along."

"But Ichimaru-taichō…he seems so – I thought he was manipulating you, making you do things you didn't want to…

He seemed amused at this. "Gin? Oh, no. He answers to me, and I answer to no one. Really, now, what have they seen saying about me back at Soul Society?"

"Well…they say you're to blame for everything. I'm the only one who didn't believe them. And – they say – you're going to invade Soul Society. With your Arrancar."

Aizen-sama shook his head sadly. "Of course, of course. If you still believed in me…then that's exactly what they would want you to think."

"What do you mean?"

"The Gotei 13 is corrupt. They more or less hold sway over the Hollows, and the overall balance of power is tipped in their favour. No shinigami is willing to relinquish that power, it would seem. Only you, Hinamori-kun. You don't enjoy killing Hollows, do you?"

"No…I only do it when there's a threat to humans or civilians, because I have to power to, and if I didn't use it to help people, it would be selfish of me."

"Yes…you are powerful, Hinamori-kun, more so than I think you realize. But the Gotei 13 – they would see your gifts wither and die before they would see you thinking for yourself. They would rather pull you under the same controlling idealisms as them, mindlessly following the orders of a group of people they never even see."

"The council…! They told me – you killed them all."

"That I did." Strangely, he was smiling again. "I did it to try and free the other shinigami from their control – the Council is the root of the problem, you know, corrupting anyone within the bounds of the Seireitei. But I was too late – far too late." He shook his head, as though filled with regret.

_The council…Chuu-Ou46 Shitsu…that day, he'd gone to see what was going on with the council, and I followed him, prepared to kill, sure I'd been betrayed…_

_Well, I hadn't been betrayed __then__…_

_Tōshirō…_

"Your letter," I exclaimed. "When you left – the letter you left behind, it said – Tōshirō killed you. Why?"

"It was the only way I could think of to warn you. If I'd written what I'm telling you now, you would never have seen that letter; they wouldn't have let you. I had hoped to make you aware by focusing your attention on someone you thought was your friend – after all, you trust Hitsugaya-kun, don't you?"

Immediately, my throat closed, and my eyes started to well up, blurring my vision.

_Trust…Hitsugaya-kun…?_

"I-I did," I whispered.

I closed my eyes, struggling to calm myself.

…_Tōshirō…_

_How could you, Tōshirō?_

Even through my closed eyelids, tears trickled out and began to pool.

I felt Aizen-sama place his hand on my cheek, and gently swiped his thumb under my eye, wiping away the tears.

"What's the matter, Hinamori-kun?" he asked, his voice the perfect cadence of concern. "Don't tell me that something…_happened, _to Hitsugaya-kun…?"

I shook my head; his hand was still on my cheek; he cupped my chin and tilted my face up. I opened my eyes.

"What happened, Hinamori-kun?"

"He left," I whispered, almost to myself. "He left me. He's still there…but he's gone. I'm alone…"

"No," said Aizen-sama softly. "You're not alone. You'll never be alone. After all…you're here."

_He's right! I don't need Tōshirō at all! I just need someone, to fill the void –_

_-- and I have that someone, now._

I blinked away the rest of my tears and smiled up at Aizen-sama, who smiled back.

"All the same," he said, "I think Hitsugaya-kun should be punished for what he's done, don't you?"

_Punished…?_

"He needs to know exactly what he's done to you. Emotions of this caliber are, after all, too great to bear alone – they must be shared. In this circumstance, I think telling him how you feel won't be sufficient. You'll have to _show _him."

I was confused, and it must have shown on my face. He continued, "Emotion is an indication that there is a soul present. Our feelings are what differentiate us from any other creature. It is therein a fact that every heart has the capacity to feel – even one such as Hitsugaya-kun's. He who appears impervious to things such as fear…pain…" Aizen-sama reached up and trailed his fingers through a few strands of my hair "…love…"

I had to suppress a shiver, although I wasn't sure why.

"…he's living a lie, Hinamori-kun. He is more than capable of feeling the same things you feel now. And so it is only fair that he does, wouldn't you say? Don't you think he needs to know exactly what he's done? Shouldn't he hurt as much as you?"

He was still fingering my hair, and I had to close my eyes against more tears as I remembered how Tōshirō had done the same thing not long ago.

The pain inside seemed to well up and overwhelm me, answering for me, in the form of spite.

"Yes."

"Then," Aizen-sama said softly, "let me help you, Hinamori-kun. I can teach you how to express your emotions in ways you've never even imagined."

My heart was racing, my head spinning.

_Something isn't right._

I was here; I'd made it. I had all the answers I needed. But…

_Something's missing._

But the feeling of euphoria I had expected wasn't taking effect.

_Do I stay…and hope for something more?_

_Or, do I go back?_

The moment to choose had arrived.

Only there was hardly a choice at all!

_Back…_

_Back to what? Back to struggling? Back to fighting with myself? Trying to separate the truths from the chaos? Return to the pain—the betrayal – the lies?_

_No, never! Never again!_

"Please," I said. "Please – teach me, Aizen-sama. Show me how – to – stop this hurting. Help me to – leave it all behind."

"I was hoping you'd say that." His smile grew even more, finally awakening in me that sense of warmth that masked everything for a blissful moment. All the pain, all the doubt – gone, eclipsed by that one feeling I'd so long missed.

_I must do whatever I can…_

_…to keep him smiling like that…_

_…and preserve this feeling…_

_…forever._

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A/N: Argh, okay, I can totally see how some people (_nawt _naming names, totally wanna beeyotch-slap Momo. How can she be so stupid, believing all that crap? It's not even convincing! It's just all the subliminal crap, i.e. "…don't you?" If you read over Aizen's monologue again, you'll notice it seems awfully scripted. I'll bet he had a prepared speech. Ha! Narcissistic rat bastard…

This is so funny, to look back and talk about the chapter as though I didn't even write it…I notice some interesting stuff that escaped me as I was writing it. Writing Aizen's dialogue was freaking _hard, _though. But not as hard as what I wrote for next chapter…oops, did I type that out loud? ^^

Okay, okay…_next chapter preview!!!_

Chapter 13: All I've Ever Wanted – Remember the nausea-inducing doubts Momo was having back in chapter nine, where she was so torn that she was practically making her self sick over it? Well, they're back in full force. But what exactly brings them about? Two things, neither of which I'm going to tell you right now! Also featuring a brief segment from an all-new P.O.V. : Gin's.

Oh, and about that quote at the beginning, from "Steel Pier"…it's an awesome musical, done by the same people who wrote "Chicago". Has anyone seen it? My school did it as the musical this year…I wanted to try out, but I didn't get to (long and boring story). It would have been cool to play Rita, though, or Shelby. Or even Precious! It would be fun to play someone that freaking annoying, and of course there's the timeless classic she sings, "Two Little Words" with the E-above-the-staff closing note (which I _can _hit, thank you very much)!

Anyhoo, I don't know if you people enjoy my ramblings, or even read them. But those of you who do, you're probably all like "she talks too much!" But I enjoy rambling…it's kind of like what the manga writers do, when they have little random notes in the columns…I always read them; they're very interesting. This is my equivalent, I guess…

Okay, that's all for now! Catch ya later in chapter-lucky-thirteen!


	13. Chapter 13: All I've Ever Wanted

**Chapter 13 – All I've Ever Wanted**

A/N: REVIEWS!!! MWAHAHA!!! FOOD FOR THE SOUL!!!! WOOT WOOT! Huge thank-yous and virtual hugs are in order for the following peeps: Full Shadow Alchemist, larkinlover, narutowolf, and Kazeek for reviewing, Kinaia for adding this to their favs, and Angel-chan1992 for subscribing!!!

If I've forgotten to thank anyone, don't be afraid to remind me and tell me what an ungrateful goof I am, and I'll post your thank-yous in the next chapter!

There's a song in this chapter: "Imaginary" by Evanescence. I know, I know, I use too much Evanescence, but I promise there will be some variety. Next chapter will feature Billy Talent and Wolfmother, okay?

Okay, no more dilly-dallying. Here we go!

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"_What happens now that we've gone this far?/Do we believe in wishes made on falling stars?" – Matthew Heatherly_

_------------------------------------_

_**Ichimaru Gin**_

__Hinamori's arrival had certainly taken us all by surprise. The greater surprise, though, was that she'd one against two of the 'fallen espada', and this was probably why she wasn't already dead. Obviously, Aizen-sama thought he'd underestimated her power, and, with it, her usefulness to him. I didn't know what he had planned for her; I didn't care; it was none of my concern. She was stupid to come here, though. Through some stroke of luck, she survived -- along with, we'd quickly gathered, Hitsugaya as well -- and yet she came wandering right back to the one who had tried to kill her simply to be rid of her, because she had ceased to be useful.

_Stupid girl._

What would happen to her, though – it didn't matter to me.

_She's a child, so innocent and trusting. But, so what, it's her own fault if she dies, for being so stupid._

I didn't care.

It was easier not to.

And because Aizen-sama had let Hinamori stay, she would continue to follow him until he got bored of her and killed her again.

I knew of one who would have followed me with that degree of loyalty, if I'd let her…

_Forget it. She doesn't matter; she is nothing. Power is the only thing for me._

I didn't care – or so I tried to tell myself.

But I knew the real reason I'd left her behind was that so she wouldn't find herself in an equivalent of Hinamori's position.

_How are you doing now…Rangiku?_

_**Hinamori Momo**_

__"Do you know what it is to hate, Hinamori-kun?"

I pondered this. At first recollection, I thought of the feelings I'd had against Ichimaru-taichō. But they were only disgust, fear, and loathing, and I realized these weren't the same things at all. Of course, I still disliked him, and would never in the lifetime trust him, but, now that I knew what was really happening, I no longer desired to kill him. I'd therein broken the vow I'd made to myself, but felt no guilt. Perhaps it was a vow I'd made in an excess of haste.

Aizen-sama was still waiting for an answer.

'I – I don't think so, Aizen-sama."

"Very good. Most think they already know what hate is, but they are wrong. For you can only truly hate that which you have once loved, that into which you have poured your heart and soul, and then betrays you."

_T__ōshirō._

I was immediately seized in a crushing, nearly suffocating grip of an invisible, yet undeniably powerful force. The feelings that I'd kept smoldering inside flowed to the surface, sending white-hot tendrils shooting off underneath my skin, through my very bloodstream. I was overwhelmed with the desires to hurt one certain person as much as he'd hurt me, to make him pay, and that I would not be satisfied unless I was the one to cause him this hurt, and not until I'd watched him writhing in agony until he begged for mercy.

Aizen-sama smiled. "Ah, yes, you feel it now, don't you? I can see it in your eyes…"

So this was hate. It was intoxicating, strangely invigorating, and yet – terrifying. I struggled to bury the thoughts I was having.

"No, no, don't suppress it, Hinamori-kun. Let your hate drive you, and derive your strength and power from this ambition. Let your hate be your fuel, and your guide to achieving your desires. Let your hate bring about your new beginning – and the end of one Hitsugaya…"

He smiled again.

So did I.

-----------------------------------------

_Sunlight filtered in visible rays through the canopy of leaves above, casting just enough light into the grove. The trees grew far enough apart to allow sufficient movement, but close enough for their leaves, silhouetted in black, to conceal all but a few patches of the mauve-tinted sky. Ferns, shrubs, and flowers dotted the dark, moist earth that carpeted the ground. The air was warm, yet crisp, and fragrant with the light, nectar-y scent of fruit._

_There were no sounds but the heavy breathing of myself and my opponent, our footsteps on the firm ground, and the echoing ring of our zanpaku-tō as they clashed again and again._

_My opponent was taller than me, and older, although it was impossible to tell by how much. Her fit, slender, yet muscular figure could be distinguished beneath her lightly tanned skin. She wore only a short skirt, a lone streaming belt, and strapless, midriff-baring shirt of a white gauzy material, as well as odd sandals made of flowered vines that wrapped all the way up her calves. These vines were identical to those woven in her hair, which was so dark a green as to appear black. When she struck out at me, her hair would whip back, revealing pointed ears. A green band encircled her forehead. Enormous iridescent purple wings exploded from her shoulderblades, black lines veined the dappled lavender surface. Her eyes, too, were purple, but they shifted between shades every few seconds, from the palest lilac to the most vivid violet, to the deepest puce._

_In all ways but appearance, however, the faerie-like creature mirrored me, matching me step for step, strike for strike, and block for block. Sweat plastered my bangs to my forehead, and my robes stuck to my damp skin. Every time I raised my blade, my arms burned with fatigue, and my muscles and tendons screamed in protest, while the faerie showed no signs of tiring._

_But I would keep going. I had to. I could not fail._

_I __would__ not fail!_

_With a vicious and feral cry, I swung my zanpaku-tō at the faerie, putting every ounce of strength I had into the blow._

_The faerie raised her own blade, but something was reflected in her mulberry-coloured eyes: a spark of momentary fear and doubt._

_My blade met hers, which shattered as though it was made of the most brittle glass, and the shards fell at her feet. She regarded me for a moment, with a mixture of shock and admiration. Then she sank to her knees before me._

_"Hinamori-sama," she murmured. "You've become so much stronger in so short a time."_

_"That shouldn't surprise you."_

_"Surprised? No." She paused. "But I am worried about you, Hinamori-sama."_

_"Don't be. This day was coming soon enough."_

_"It's not your power I'm concerned about – it's what you're going to choose to do with it."_

_"What are you insinuating? Don't you trust me?"_

_"Of course! Our ultimate goal is, after all, one and the same…but I suppose I'm not permitted to have my doubts as to your methods."_

_I relented. "I'm sorry. You know I didn't mean it like that."_

_The faerie's face was impassive. "Do I? You've hardly been yourself in these weeks past—the prime reason for my concern."_

_Bristling, I replied, "I'm fine. Besides, am I not allowed to be upset once in a while?"_

_"I'm only saying that you should be more aware of yourself, or I sense you may end up doing something you're going to regret."_

_"You really don't trust me, do you?"_

_'I think you're letting yourself be too easily led."_

_I snapped, "You're out of line."_

_The faerie's eyes widened slightly, then she bowed her head so I was unable to read her expression. "My apologies, Hinamori-sama," she murmured. I wondered if I detected a hint of reproach in her words, desiring no longer to continue the argument._

_"Apology accepted," I said briskly, "so long as you stop worrying about me. That's an order. Do you understand…Tobiume?"_

_The faerie bowed her head once more._

_"Yes, Hinamori-sama."_

_------------------------------------_

_I linger in the doorway  
Of alarm clock screaming monsters calling my name  
Let me stay  
Where the wind will whisper to me  
Where the raindrops as they're falling tell a story_

When I opened my eyes, I was back in the throne room, and Aizen-sama stood before me, smiling, his golden eyes shimmering in the torchlight.

"You've done it," he said. "The strength of your reiatsu has increased exponentially; can you feel it?"

I could; it was like nothing I'd ever expected to detect from myself. This new presence loomed over me, as part of me, seemingly invulnerable, hulking and alien, and, at the same time, being embraced – or ensnared? – by this unfamiliar strength, and I immediately felt a sense of drowning in myself, and my breath caught in my throat.__

In my field of paper flowers  
And candy clouds of lullaby 

_I lie inside myself for hours  
And watch my purple sky fly over me_

"Your new strength will take some getting used to – but it will make every aspect of your performance stronger. Soon," said Aizen-sama, "you will be unstoppable, Hinamori-kun. Hitsugaya will be the first to try – and the first to fall."

Overwhelmed with this new kind of reiatsu, the thought didn't fill me with the excitement and desire that it usually did. With all of this power – would I b able to keep it under control? This tiny seed of doubt burst into flower, scattering its tainted pollen into the forbidden corners of my thoughts.

"If you could only hate that which you have once loved," I said softly, "don't you first have to let go of that love?"

"That's exactly right."

'I – Hitsugaya-taichō…" I faltered. "I—I don't know if I can…let go, I mean." I lowered my gaze to the floor, ashamed of my weakness.

_Don't say I'm out of touch  
With this rampant chaos - your reality  
I know well what lies beyond my sleeping refuge  
The nightmare _

_I built my own world to escape_

Aizen-sama took two steps, closing the short distance between us, reaching out with a relaxed hand and tilting my chin up with a single finger; his touch was barely perceptible. For a long minute, he studies my face, and I felt a twinge of discomfort.

Finally, he smiled again. "Well," he said, "you're certainly not the little girl I left behind."

I blushed self-consciously; I could feel my cheeks heating up and turning pink.

He continued, his tone friendly and congenial, without even a hint of impatience. 'I thought we'd been through this already, Hinamori-kun. It is in killing Hitsugaya that you will be letting go of him. All of this has been preparing you for that moment – and now, you're finally ready."

Was I?

"Aizen-sama, I'm not ready," I said, my voice rising into a panic. "I can't do it; I still—" the words _"love him" _choked themselves off in a dry sob.__

You have to leave the world you live in

_Lay your head down and stay awhile_

_Though you may not remember dreaming_

_Something waits for you to breathe again_

"Hinamori-kun," said Aizen-sama softly, "all around you is all you've ever wanted, and your happiness forever. Hitsugaya is like a chain that binds you to what you left behind, holding you back from your happiness. Don't you think you deserve that happiness? Don't you think that chain should be eliminated?"

Did I? Was this really all I've ever wanted?

'As long as he lives, Hinamori-kun, he will continue to hold you back."

I'd only come here to be with Aizen-sama again…

"Don't you think you owe it to yourself to end his life, and therein begin your own?"

"But there's a part of me…that still wants to forgive him," I said, speaking this truth the moment it came to me.

"He doesn't deserve your forgiveness," said Aizen-sama calmly.

"But…is that not my decision, Aizen-sama?" Then I stiffened at my own audacity; I had dared to question –

Aizen-sama remained as unperturbed as ever. "Your judgment is impaired," he said matter-of-factly. "You must do this; I am telling you to do this, for your own benefit." His hand was still supporting my chin; his thumb slid over, in such a way that I questioned if it was voluntary or reflex, and began making small, slow circles on the soft, sensitive skin under my jaw. Prickling shivers shot through me. I remained silent, still unconvinced, somehow. I avoided looking Aizen-sama in the eyes.

"Hinamori-kun," he said, lowering his voice to nearly a whisper, "if you won't do this for yourself…then you'll do it for me, won't you?"

I'd only come here to be with Aizen-sama again…

Oddly, it struck me then how different Aizen-sama was from Tōshirō. In nearly every way they were opposites: height, build, carriage, and even hair colour. But, most of all, spirit. Aizen-sama was calm and charismatic, with that easy smile of his that warmed me from the inside out. And then there was Tōshirō, cold and distant, with his heart of ice, which may as well have been a heart of glass, for all the likelihood of its ever melting.

With my reiatsu so unfamiliar to me at that moment, I had become far more self-aware, and I could no longer hide from some of the more unpleasant thoughts, such as:

Did I come here to see Aizen-sama…or just to get away from anything and anyone to do with Tōshirō?

Internally, I gave my head a shake. Impossible. I was, as ever, loyal to Aizen-sama. And I would do anything for him!

…except for this.

But this wasn't a question of who I would do it for, but if I could do it at all. But I somehow couldn't make him understand…I tried to turn my face away, but his eyes held my gaze, and I felt paralyzed.

"Momo," he said softly, and the use of my first name startled me. "You've come so far in such a short time, and I'm so proud of you."

What could be wrong? These words weren't giving me that rush of joy that they used to.

"I believe that you can do this. For yourself—and for me."

Something was very, very wrong…

Aizen-sama smiled, not in the least discouraged by my doubt. "Perhaps," he murmured, "a little motivation…?" He tilted my face up some more and his eyes glinted.

And then, his lips were pressing against mine, soft but insistent.

Shock ignited my heart rate, sending blood roaring through my ears. I closed my eyes out of reflex, but I did not kiss him back. My arms hung limp at my sides, and I stood as though frozen.

_  
Swallowed up in the sound of my screaming  
Cannot cease for the fear of silent nights  
_

I will admit…perhaps, in a tiny, barely conscious corner of my heart, I had hoped this would happen someday, even though the kind of love I felt for Aizen-sama was hardly romantic.

But nothing about this was right.

With Tōshirō, it had been bliss, ecstasy.

Now…it was confusion, fear…and something bordering on revulsion.

_Oh, how I long for the deep sleep dreaming  
The goddess of imaginary light_

I took a step back. "I can't." To what I was referring, even I wasn't certain.

"Yes, Momo, you can," he replied gently.

My eyes filled to brimming; a single tear trailed down my cheek. "No, I can't."

"You can."

'I can't!" I cried; the two words echoed throughout the room, hysterical and desperate. "I can't," I repeated softly, locking my gaze with the floor. "I'm so sorry, Aizen-sama." I sank to my knees, out of respect or because my legs wouldn't support me, I remained unsure. "Please forgive me," I whispered, closing my eyes to hold back the rest of my tears.

For a long moment, the silence loomed over me, imposing, crushing.__

In my field of paper flowers  
And candy clouds of lullaby 

_I lie inside myself for hours  
And watch my purple sky fly over me_

"Perhaps I had too much faith in you," said Aizen-sama. "I truly believed such measures wouldn't be necessary." Even then, he didn't sound disappointed; his tone hadn't changed. But I'd mistaken it to be calming and reassuring, when really, it was careless.

I looked up. He was standing back slightly, studying me – was it a trick of the light, or did his eyes seem to reflect a cool indifference? He held his zanpaku-tō, unsheathed, at his side. When had he drawn it?

A voice in my head came to life. _Run. Run, __now._

And another: _Tōshirō…I need you! Where are you, Tōshirō?_

And another, only it was Aizen-sama again.

"Momo…you _can_ kill Hitsugaya." He paused. "And you will."

He smiled.

It was the same smile as ever, but it seemed somehow different to me, stirring up all my old fears.

_Run._

I wanted to; I didn't want to…

_Run!_

It didn't matter; I was rooted in place, powerless, crushed by both reiatsu in the room, those two alien presences…

Aizen-sama spoke three more words: "_Shatter, Kyōka Suigetsu."_

It was as though a blizzard appeared from nowhere, swirling around me, extinguishing my vision, my senses, my thoughts, my life…?

Everything was white, and I was blind.

And then, suddenly, the white and the darkness were both there; they were the same, and I was falling, falling…

--------------------------

A/N: DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW HARD THAT WAS FOR ME TO WRITE???!!! AHHHHHHHH! DISTURBING AND CREEPY AND DISGUSTING!!! ARRRGH!!! But the muses of inspiration made me do it. I'm sorry. But, word of advice: save your anger; things are going to get worse; you're gonna hate me later, if you don't already.

"I'd therein broken the vow I'd made to myself, but felt no guilt. Perhaps it was a vow I'd made in an excess of haste. [Momo thought]"

Did you catch that delicious bit of irony right there? The "excess of haste" part? I thought it was pretty awesome, myself.

Here is where it starts getting good, my friends.

_NEXT CHAPTER PREVIEW: (well, sort of)_

Chapter 14: Leave this World Behind – all I can say is that it goes back to Hitsugaya here, and he'll either learn the error of his ways, or he won't, and he won't realize what a big mistake he's made until Momo comes to kill him! Bwahahahahaha!

That's all I know. I haven't written it yet.

But I _have _written this sweet new IchiHime twoshot: it's called "Our Favourite Strawberry", so check it out!

Keep that awesome and splendiferous feedback coming!

'Kay, that's it 'til next chapter!

~Raye ^_^


	14. Chapter 14: Leave This World Behind

A/N: Yay!!!! Reviews! Y'all know what I like…thank-yous to narutowolf, Kazeek, larkinlover, Rana, Amanda, and Full Shadow Alchemist for your awesome-tastic reviews, and thanks you as well to Tomoshibi-chan for fav-ing and to the community Favorite Fiction to adding this fic! I was like _screaming _with happiness when I saw it; I was like "I got a c2; I got a c2!!!" ^^

Anyway, I'm sorry that it's taken forever to update, but I hope this chapter will be worth it. Be warned, though, it didn't really turn out as angsty as I'd thought it was going to, but the later chapters are going to be a lot more "emo".

As I mentioned last chapter, this chapter will contain both Billy Talent and Wolfmother – the songs being "Red Flag" (slightly abridged) and "Joker and the Thief", respectively.

------------------------------

Das Fernster öffnet sich nicht mehr/Hier drin ist's voll von dir und mehr/Und vor mir geht die letzte Kerze aus/Ich warte schon ne Ewigkeit/Endlich ist es jetzt so weit/und draußen ziehn die schwarzen Wolken auf

(Translation) I'm staring at a broken door/there's nothin left here anymore/my room is cold/it's makin me insane/i've been waitin here so long/but now the moment seems to've come /i see the dark clouds comin up again

---Tokio Hotel, "Monsoon"

------------------------------

**Chapter 14 – Leave This World Behind**

_**Matsumoto Rangiku**_

I knew right away that something was not right with Tōshirō.

In his actions, he was exactly the same, but there was an odd sort of vibe about him, one that could not be detected by anyone except those who knew him well.

Tōshirō truly thrived in his position as captain. For him, it was not so much the prospect of power as the sense of control brought by his authority: he could obtain for himself consistency and solidity, a steady familiarity. Today, I noticed nothing out of the ordinary, other than that he fell into his role a little too easily. Nonetheless, I had to marvel.

_How is it that he can hide his emotions so well? He's barely more than a child, and yet…it's just not normal. _

_Though, I don't think he's ever been 'normal'…_

There was no time to try to talk to him; though. It was now only two weeks until we had to be prepared around the clock for an invasion, and each squad was to have its own tasks in battle, based on what we could expect, to practice and perfect in this time. The instant the sun came up, the tenth division was assembled, and there would be no opportunity before our mid-morning reprieve.

The instant it came, however, he vanished.

_**Hitsugaya T**__**ōshirō**_

_"Tōshirō, stand up!"_

_"What for?"_

_"Come on, just for a minute, please?"_

_"Okay…"_

_"Oh! I was right! Look, Tōshirō, you're taller than me! When did that happen, I wonder…?"_

_"I don't know…I never noticed…but why are you –"_

_"Is your voice lower, too? Keep talking; I want to be sure."_

_"…"_

_"Oh, fine, then! But, I want to know, when you talk to yourself in your head, does it still sound higher?"_

_"What kind of a question is that?!"_

_"Ha! It is lower, a little…"_

_"…What difference does that make?"_

_"…None…but, I guess – since you're taller and everything, I'm not allowed to call you 'Shiro-chan' anymore."_

_"You never __were__ allowed to call me that!"_

_"Oh. So nothing's changed then, has it…Shiro-chan?"_

_"Argh! What will it take to get you to stop already?!"_

_'Hahaha…taller or not, you haven't changed, Tōshirō."_

_"…Of course not. If we grew up all at once…days like this would be left behind-- and forgotten."_

_"No, they wouldn't! With you and me, these days will last forever."_

_"…There's no such thing as forever."_

_"…I guess not…"_

_"…Hey, don't look like that. I know what you meant, I shouldn't have said anything…"_

_"Then don't say anything to start with, silly! Why do you always have to act so cold?"_

_so cold…_

_just like ice_

_just like ice_

_just_

_like_

_ice_

_…_

_-------------------------_

_Come on! Focus! There's work to be done; get your head in the game!_

It was no use. Though it was no mystery as to why – only one person was capable of reducing me to this state simply by being present in my thoughts.

But it didn't take this, nor the sleepless night I had passed, to tell me that I'd made a mistake.

I'd been trying to tell myself that what I'd done was for her benefit; but it was just a lie...even if I died in battle, it wouldn't hurt her as much as my words did. But it was my longing for peace of mind -- I had refused to admit to her, or even to myself, that I was losing control, that I didn't know what to do about what I was feeling.

_I'll tell her that; I'll tell her all of it. She deserves to know the truth._

So, the instant I dismissed squad ten for their morning reprieve, I made my way over to the fifth division. However, the only person I met there was a disgruntled Abarai.

"Have you seen Hinamori?" he asked me.

_I thought that was __my__ question…_

"No…"

"Oh, man – see, she was supposed to be here to help me out, since this is _her_ division and everything, and so I could run back and forth between here and sixth. And the third seat girl is useless, I don't know how she got the position...sorry; you know all this. I'm just a mess; Kuchiki-taichō is gonna be pissed at me, and it's not like Hinamori to just not show up, and I'm kind of worried about her. But I have to get over to sixth _now—_so, if you see her, let me know what's going on, okay?"

"I will." One part of his flustered rambling had really stuck with me.

_"It's not like Hinamori to just not show up."_

This was true – when her absence would affect others beside herself, she would never think of forsaking her duty.

Unless something was seriously wrong.

With haste, I made my way to the dormitories.

I knocked on Momo's door, to be greeted only by silence.

Again I knocked, louder. "Momo? Are you in there?"

Silence.

With an increasing sense of dread, I opened the door to disclose…an empty room.

But there were three things that kept me from closing the door and looking elsewhere. First – the noxious odor of burning the assailed me. Second – the scorch marks that formed a perfect square on the floor. Third – the charred piece of paper that lay next to it.

I ran forward and picked up the paper. Scanning it, I recognized the list of kidō that I'd seen before. I contemplated the numbers and incantations, then looked back at the black square, with a horrifying jolt of understanding.

_She made a portal with the kidō! She's – gone._

And there was only one other place she would ever think to go…

_**Matsumoto Rangiku**_

The temperature of the air dropped rapidly and drastically, but I shivered for a different reason.

_Oh no…_

_T__ōshirō…_

I followed his reiatsu to Momo's room – it was now freezing in there, and everything was crusted with a thick layer of frost. Tōshirō was standing in the centre of the room with a piece of paper crumpled in his fist.

He looked up at me as I entered, and I almost staggered back from his gaze – vivid, desperate intensity.

"She's gone," he said quietly.

It was clear from the scorch marks on the floor that he meant "gone" as in "gone from this dimension".

_Oh no…_

"Tōshirō – I'm so sorry. I know how hard you tried to –"

"I'm going after her."

"What…? No, Tōshirō, you can't –"

He seemed to snap. "Are you saying I should leave her there to die?!" he hollered, and the room became even colder with his rage.

"No, no, I'm not –"

"She's gone back to Aizen – expecting to be welcomed, no doubt, but he's just going to kill her; that fucker _is going to kill her,_ and it's my fault!!" He paused, his breathing heavy, and there was the slightest catch in his next words. "My fault! Because I didn't tell her I loved her when I had the chance!"

I blinked. My eyes were only closed for a fraction of a second, but, when they opened again, it was like looking at a different person, a new Tōshirō. I could see through his eyes, behind his carefully maintained mask, down the his very soul, a turmoil of raw emotion, at the centre of which lay a vulnerability that was both childlike and the exact opposite – his outward appearance, his expression, seemed caught somewhere between five years and thirty-five.

"Tōshirō…" I started. "You know how quickly the time goes by in Hueco Mundo. Weeks will have passed there already. She's probably – probably already dead."

"'Probably' is just another way of saying 'indefinitely', which means there's still a chance, and I am going to take it!"

"But—she – she left of her own accord, Tōshirō. It's entirely possible that she's gone to take up arms on Aizen's side." It was something that I did not want to believe or consider, but was, unfortunately, a glaringly feasible possibility. "What if you run in there trying to be the hero and then get killed? To what avail will that –"

"'Trying to be the hero'?! Trying to make amends for what I did, you mean!" Tōshirō yelled. "And how can you say that about Momo? She wouldn't just run off like that; not after finally accepting the truth! She's _not_ Ichimaru!"

I recoiled, feeling as though I'd been slapped.

Gin was the reason I had to suspect Momo of betrayal. I'd thought I could trust him…and then he was gone. Not physically gone, but…he wasn't himself anymore. Only now did I know that Aizen was to blame for that as well…

Tōshirō sensed my upset. "That was uncalled for; I apologize," he said, sounding more like himself.

The determination, however, had not left his gaze. I still saw a different Tōshirō, one who was irrational and impulsive, one who was going to rush into this and likely get himself hurt.

"It's fine," I said. Then, "I'm coming with you."

"No, you're not," he said calmly. "Do you think I don't know this is madness? I'm not going to drag you into this as well."

I amended my earlier thought. This was indeed the same Tōshirō, but it was a side of him I had never seen before – that no one had seen, that no one had been allowed to see. Not desperate, really; he was still himself after all, but visibly charged by emotions I hadn't known he possessed.

"You wouldn't be dragging me," I said, "not if I –"

"No," he said simply. "Goodbye, Matsumoto."

And then he began reading the kidō off the list.

I left the room then – not because I didn't want to watch him go, but because there wasn't a second to spare. Even as I left though, I had to admit to myself that, again, I'd been wrong.

_He may be young…but he's no child._

_**Hitsugaya T**__**ōshirō**_

_A chance…_

_I still have a chance…_

_And if there's the slightest possible chance…_

_I'll take it._

_And if I die…_

_So be it._

_But not before…_

_…I tell you…_

_If I die…_

_No matter._

_Without you…_

_…my life is nothing…_

_…but if I'd realized it sooner…_

_…if only I'd realized…_

_**Matsumoto Rangiku**_

_Cast off the crutch that kills the pain,  
The red flag wavin' never meant the same,  
the kids of tomorrow don't need today,  
When they live in the sins of yesterday_

An emergency meeting was called for the captains and vice-captains.

"This will be brief, as we haven't the time to waste," said Yamamoto-sōtaichō. "I have been informed of the disappearance of Hinamori-fukutaichō…and that she is gone to Hueco Mundo." There were a few gasps and mutterings, and frowns of surprise from Renji and Izuru. "But what we are here for is to assemble a retrieval team to bring back Hitsugaya-taichō, who has rashly gone after her."

_Well I've never seen us act like this,  
our only hope is the minds of kids,  
and they'll show us a thing or two._

"But what about Hinamori?" asked Izuru.

"She is nothing," said Yamamoto-sōtaichō. "She had likely turned traitor, and, even if she hasn't, we can't afford to waste time to fetch her. Hitsugaya-taichō, as one of our precious few bankai-wielders, cannot be spared in our upcoming battle; therefore we must go to Hueco Mundo, find him, and bring him back as quickly as possible."

"But if Hinamori—" started Renji.

"If she attempts to impede of resist your retrieval mission—kill her," said Yamamoto. "Now, do I have any volunteers?"

_Our only weapons are the guns of youth,  
It's only time before they tighten the noose,_

_and then the hunt will be on for you.  
_

_**Abarai Renji**_

_The red flag wavin' never meant to same_

_No, the red flag wavin' never meant the same  
Cast off the crutch that kills the pain,  
the red flag wavin' never meant the same,  
the kids of tomorrow don't need today,  
when they live in the sins of yesterday._

Several hands shot up into the air, mine among them.

"Idiots," I heard Kurotsuchi-taichō mutter. "If Hitsugaya's run off after Aizen's little pet, they should just leave him, and not risk half our ranking force."

But Hitsugaya had known, no doubt, that there was more to Hinamori's story. Three of the hands that were in the air now – mine, Kira's and Matsumoto's – belonged to those who would be responsible for bringing Hinamori back as well, and giving her at least a chance to explain herself. And also to make sure, at all costs, that she would not be killed._  
_

_Like a smallest bee packs a sting,  
Like a pawn checkmates a king,  
we'll attack at the crack of dawn.  
_

But then I started thinking…we would be going to Hueco Mundo, of course – right into Aizen's fortress.

Aizen---he'd very nearly cost me my right arm, my captain, Hinamori's sanity, and…Rukia. Damn rights I was eager to take a direct shot at him!

_  
Build a ladder if there's a wall,  
don't be afraid to slip and fall,  
speak for yourself or they'll speak for you._

I probably wasn't the only one with an ulterior motive for going. Kira was probably looking to get back at Ichimaru somehow…and Matsumoto, too. I'd known the two of them had been friends, and maybe something more…

Hisagi had volunteered as well. _Definitely a grudge against T__ō__sen. _Byakuya-taichō had his hand raised, no doubt determined to see Aizen pay for the hit he'd taken on his life and his pride to save Rukia, nearly dying on Aizen's word and Ichimaru's blade. Soi Fong-taichō as well – long ago, Aizen had cost her her friend and mentor, Shihoin Yoruichi.

'It appears we have our retrieval team," said Yamamoto-sōtaichō._  
_

_The red flag wavin' never meant the same_

_No, the red flag wavin' never meant the same  
Cast off the crutch that kills the pain,  
the red flag wavin never meant the same,  
the kids of tomorrow don't need today,  
when they live in the sins of yesterday. _

_  
_He continued, "As I said, it shall be simple. Go, find Hitsugaya-taichō and bring him back. Get in and out as quickly as you can. We are taking a huge risk here, and you cannot afford to waste your lives. The way I see it, however, the stronger the team, the better chance you all have of getting out alive."

"And Aizen won't be expecting a direct attack," Hisagi pointed out.

"This is not an attack!" Yamamoto-sōtaichō declared angrily. "You have your mission; now is not the time to settle a personal score!"_  
_

But he was wrong. Hisagi was right. Aizen would never suspect that we would enter Hueco Mundo, and this would be our one chance for an ambush, and to do as much damage as we could.

_I said the joker is a wanted man,  
He makes his way all across the land,  
See him sifting through the sand,  
So I'll tell you all the story,  
About the joker and the thief of the night_

Of course it would be taking a risk. But what difference would it make if the risk was here, or out on the battlefield in two weeks?

_He's always laughing in the midst of power,  
Always living in the final hour,  
There is always sweet in the sour,  
We are not goin' home_

"Dismissed," said Yamamoto-sōtaichō. We all filed out of the conference room, but the newly appointed members of the retrieval squad assembled outside the door.

"Okay," said Matsumoto, "we need to get going as soon as possible, so—"

"Hey," came a voice that surprised me with its familiarity. "You weren't thinking of leaving without me, were you?"

_Can you see the joker flying over,  
As she's standing in the field of clover,  
Watching out everyday?  
I wonder what would happen if he took her away?_

"Rukia!" I said.

"Rukia…" started Byakuya-taichō, warningly.

"I heard everything; I'm coming with you," said Rukia.

"No—it's too dangerous," said Byakuya.

'Nii-sama, please – you can't have too many people, and I –"

'No."

"Kuchiki-taichō," I broke in, "she has just as much a right as anyone to come with us. Who are we to say that --?"

Rukia sent me an appreciative glance, but Byakuya-taichō's eyes narrowed dangerously. "Who are you to propose a deterrent from a direct order, when time is what we cannot afford to spare?"

_What you see well you might not know,  
You get the feelin' comin' after the glow,  
The vagabond is moving slow,  
So I'll tell you all the story,  
'bout the joker and the thief of the night_

Rukia glared defiantly, walked toward me, stood up on her tiptoes and kissed me, there, in front of everyone. Then she met her adoptive brother's eyes, squaring her shoulders.

"That's who," she said simply.

_All the people that he see in the night,  
Hold their dreams up to the light,  
The wilder beast is searching for sight,  
We are not goin' home,  
_

That was definitely not how I was planning to tell people, especially her brother/my captain…I cringed inwardly. It didn't help that the others were looking away, rolling there eyes, coughing to hide their embarrassment, or, in Matsumoto's case, trying not the giggle. Byakuya-taichō shifted his gaze to me and stared me down for an agonizingly long time –

--before finally giving a barely perceptible nod of approval. I would say there was a flicker of amusement in his eyes, but I don't that's possible for him. It must have been a trick of the light.

"All right," said Matsumoto, tossing her hair back and regaining her composure. "Can we leave now?"

"One thing first," saidRukia. "I have an idea."

So, we stopped in the human world, at Urahara's shop, and found Kurosaki there, who agreed to come with us. Another bankai-wielder would come in very useful, and it also happened that Inoue was there as well, and decided to come, as did Shihoin.

_Can you see the joker flying over,  
As she's standing in the field of clover,  
Watching out everyday?  
I wonder what would happen if he took her away?_

We were finally off, then, after what seemed an eternity, but was really more like fifteen minutes. This was good, because for every minute that passed here, nearly an hour went by in Hueco Mundo. _Hang in there, Hinamori – we're on our way._

I still hoped, however, that we would get a chance to raise a little hell while we were there. This was war, after all, and that bastard Aizen had definitely made it personal.

Not a good combination unless one's looking to get their ass kicked.

_I said the joker is a wanted man_

_He makes his way all across the land_

_See him sifting through the sand_

_So I'll tell you the story 'bout the joker and the thief,  
Tell you the story 'bout the joker and the thief,  
I said, I'll tell you the story 'bout the joker and the thief,  
Of the night_

**_Hitsugaya Tōshirō_**

_I have to tell you; you have to know._

_I will take you away, and then I will tell you everything. What you have to know. What you deserve to know._

_I won't dare hope for your forgiveness. I will be content if you know the truth._

_No--I won't, not really. I will only be happy if you say you forgive me, say you love me, too._

_But I'm not a fool. I know that's too much to hope for._

_My only wish is this: let me find you safe, whole, unbroken. _

_And please…_

_Please, god, Momo…_

_Please don't be dead._

_-----------------------_

A/N: You know, I noticed this the other day, but Tōshirō has exactly the same eye shape as Byakuya. I hope that means Tōshirō is going to be as pretty as Byakuya when he's older^^ But have you seen what happened to him in chapter 355 on onemanga?!?!?! I was like, screaming, nooooooooooooooooooooo!!! It was so bad! SO BAD!!!

Renji: "Damn rights I was eager to take a direct shot at him!" Hahahahaha that's why I love Renji. He's the easiest person to write for; he talks the most like me in real life.

OKAY!!! IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT!!!

I may have said before that there was no way I was doing a segment from Aizen's POV. I don't remember. If I did, well…I'm sorry, I lied. I'm very intrigued as to how he thinks, so…I'm going to try it! If all goes as planned, the next chapter will be almost entirely from the hated one's POV. (Don't worry, I'm NOT gonna do the whole make-the-reader-sympathize-with-the-bad-guy thing.) Thank you to Full Shadow Alchemist, who gave me the courage to do this, by saying "your Aizen is the BEST. I am completely in love with how IC he is." That totally made my day, because writing even his dialogue is really really hard to keep IC. But I have decided that I can be brave enough to do first-person…so, that constitutes your next chapter preview! That's all you can know, because that's all I know, for now…

Kay! read and review, the usual, svp! Catch ya later!

~Raye Lynne


	15. Chapter 15: Reunion II

**Chapter 15 – Reunion II**

A/N: Hi, you guys! Sorry, I know it's taken me forever to update, again, but this chapter was EXTREMELY hard. I almost died. Seriously, it was that bad.

I OFFICIALLY HATE AIZEN EVEN MORE!!!! I didn't know it was possible to, but now that I've written from his POV I'm like, ew, you fucker, I hate you, go die in a corner!

NO…THAT WOULD BE AN INSULT TO THE CORNER!!!!

Anyhow, I believe there are some thank-yous in order. They go to:

My reviewers: Rana, killerbunny78, larkinlover, Kazeek, narutowolf, and CptnEdwards.

My subscribers: CptnEdwards, NaruHinaFanboy

My favers: narutowolf, CptnEdwards, NaruHinaFanboy

THANK YOU, THANK YOU SO MUCH!!! YOU GUYS MAKE ME SO HAPPY!!

…especially now that I'm over 50 reviews! You guys are awesome, and I present to you, without further ado, chapter 15!

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_A devil in a midnight mass/killed the boy inside the man/The holy water in his hands/Can never wash away his sins/Hold your breath and count to four/Pinky swears don't work no more/Put my trust in God that day/Not the man that taught his way/I was alive but now I'm singing/Silent night for the rest of my life/Silent night for the rest of my life/Violent knight at the edge of your knife/"Forgive me Father!" won't make it right/Silent night for the rest of my life/Silent night at the edge of your knife/You're guilty! _"Devil in a Midnight Mass" (Billy Talent)

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_Without the mask/Where will you hide?/ Can't find yourself/lost in your lie – "_Everybody's Fool" (Evanescence)

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_**Aizen S**__**ōsuke**_

_"Captain…is it all right…if I stay with you for a while?"_

_"Of course, Hinamori-kun."_

_"Really? Thank you…I'm sorry to bother you so late at night, but I couldn't sleep and – I hope you're not angry."_

_"Why would I be angry? As well—you're not the only one still awake." I gestured to the half-written scrolls spread out on the table. Hinamori smiled._

_I stood, removing the cotton robe resting on my shoulders and draping it over hers instead. This was an act so tangent to the second nature that I'd created for myself that I hadn't even to think before I did it. I spread the door a little wider, inviting her in._

_"Why don't you sit down and tell me what it is that's bothering you?"_

_She sat down carefully on a corner of the futon, pulling her knees up under her chin and clasping her arms around her legs. I knelt down at the table again, but did not resume writing._

_Hinamori sighed. "It's just that – all of this fighting – and now we have to carry our zanpaku-tō everywhere – I don't see why it has to come to this. I mean," she added hastily, "I know that the Ryōka are dangerous, but…if we just kill them like we're supposed to, and don't take the time to find out and understand who they are, why they're here, and what exactly they want…isn't that just like asking for this to happen again? For there to be more violence and more pain? I just don't see how we can find a solution unless we find peace first."_

_I regarded her with genuine interest. I was intrigued at how thoughtful she could be – but was extremely naïve as well. Although this last was perfectly suited to my intentions, she was still very young, and it would likely be something to be outgrown given time._

_Although, what time she had left to her would hardly be enough._

_'Of course peace is the ideal goal," I said. "All we're being told to do is to be prepared for the very worst, rather than risk our lives by raising our hopes too high."_

_She still seemed partially unconvinced. "I understand…but…all this time, I've had the strangest feeling about the Ryōka…like – like – they know something that we don't."_

_"…What made you think that?"_

_"It was just a feeling I got from a dream…I've been having several strange dreams lately, dreams I can't understand…they're starting to frighten me."_

_"What sorts of dreams?"_

_"Well, there was one that was just me, looking into a mirror – only I couldn't see myself in it. There were flower petals at my feet, but it was dark all around me; I didn't know where I was. Suddenly, the mirror rippled, like it was water, as though someone had dropped a stone into it. Then I could see the moon in the mirror, and it grew and grew until this big bright shape burst from the mirror and – the dream didn't end there, exactly, but I – I think I – died. I know it's silly, being frightened by a dream, but…"_

_"It's not 'silly' at all. It's important to heed dreams, especially when one has yume shiryoku as potent as you do."_

_Yume shiryoku, or "dreamsight", was common enough amongst all shinigami, to varying degrees, but it appeared to be the strongest in youthful prodigies such as Hinamori. It was natural, at this point, that she would envision her death, as it was soon approaching. From which direction though, no dream could warn her to the point where she would guess. _

_Though all four elements had appeared in the dream – mirror, flower, water, moon. Kyōka Suigetsu. But Hinamori would never make the connection – it wasn't a confident probability, but a simple certainty._

_I continued, "And what could the Ryōka know that would harm us? Likely they are trying to incite unnecessary fear in us., and it is important to disregard this fear and stay alert."_

_'Oh!" said Hinamori. "Then I'm falling for their trap? Oh, no, I'm sorry; I'm sorry; I'll try harder, I promise!"_

_I smiled. "Don't worry yourself so much, Hinamori-kun. I don't fault you."_

_"Oh," she sighed, relieved, "good. Because –" she stifled a yawn "—because I hate disappointing you…I always try…so hard…to please you, Captain Aizen."_

_"I know you do."_

_She smiled sleepily. "Thank you for letting me talk to you. I feel much better now…"_

_'As always, it was no bother, Hinamori-kun. Now, you seem tired…"_

_"Oh, but can I stay just a little longer, please? I won't bother you so you can finish your work in peace, and I won't fall asleep, but can I please just…stay?"_

_"Of course."_

_It failed to surprise me when I looked over a few minutes later and saw her lying curled up on her side, fast asleep. And yet, I could not help but marvel at her unconscious form, an indirect result of decades of carefully crafted lies and deceit – Hinamori Momo trusted me enough to fall asleep in my presence, to make herself vulnerable, to let down her consciousness, the very last of her defences, leaving her completely helpless. She had enough trust in me to be ignorant to the fact that, in that moment, I could take advantage of it in any number of ways: I could strangle her, snap her neck with my bare hands, or run her through there and then. As comically easy as it would have been to kill her, I refrained from doing so for two reasons: first, it would be odd if her corpse were found in my quarters, but, more importantly, I needed her to kill Hitsugaya for me._

_Very likely he was harmless, but he had come closer than anyone to uncovering my plans, in that he suspected Gin. He was one of the few who had even noticed something was amiss, and that his suspicions were directed so close to the mark was slightly unnerving. At this stage, I could not afford to take risks. I could depend on nothing but certainties._

_No one else could be counted upon to make sure he died. Being a captain, Hitsugaya would be, at the worst, imprisoned until he could receive a proper trial, and with him still alive, there was a constant risk of discovery. But Hinamori…with all her trust and loyalty to me would see him dead._

_I placed the now-finished papers in an envelope and sealed it with wax. Hinamori would kill Hitsugaya, and this letter would be the spark that ignited her misdirected wrath._

_Perhaps she might even be executed, which would save me the trouble of killing her myself. After all her years of service, it seemed almost a shame to have to end her life, but it would be necessary in the near future. She would no longer be useful to me once Hitsugaya was dead, and it was entirely possible that she would be used a weapon against me in the future, if I allowed her to live._

_It was the silence of the room that brought me back to myself. It was time. I pulled my shihakushō and haori over my white sleeping robes, then went back to Hinamori and lifted her carefully; her body weighed practically nothing, a fragile vessel for a life so delicate. A near-inaudible sigh escaped her parted lips, a prelude to her last breath. I placed her under the covers letting them fall over her shoulders with a curious finality, rather like a shroud._

_Then I made to leave, opening the door without a sound, and regarded Hinamori once more._

_She needn't die in vain, at least. She would be the first to know, the first to see my true face…_

_I slowly pulled the door shut, therein setting my plan in motion, at long last, and leaving everything I had built up in the last one hundred years behind; with satisfaction, I felt as though I were closing many more doors than just that one._

_-----------------------------_

I admit, I hadn't foreseen Hinamori appearing here in Hueco Mundo.

Her survival alone was surprise enough, although not as much as it could have been. Having briefly encountered Unohana and Kotetsu before leaving, I had occasionally wondered if either she or Hitsugaya had been found in time enough to be saved. But I'd thought that, if she'd lived, I would see her only once more, when the Soul Society forces would attempt -- and fail – to halt my invasion of Karakura. And, if she had lived, she would certainly die in battle, as it was my intention to decimate every last shinigami.

Her arrival here was certainly unexpected, and, with the timing, I'd initially thought she had been sent by Yamamoto as a spy or even to destroy the Hogyōku. For this reason it was my first impulse to have her killed immediately, and I would have, had she not bested both Skalag del Crimslagh and Scarran Yomeng in combat. I'd known she possessed extreme prowess, but I would not have envisioned her defeating not one, but two of my Arrancar, much less those of the fallen espada level.

Once Gin and Kaname had brought her before me, I'd known she hadn't come to pose a threat, though I was still surprised – either I'd underestimated the effectiveness of my own deception or the level of her naïveté. Perhaps both.

Of course, I was willing to take her back as my subordinate – it appeared she would be useful to me after all, and I would train her personally to turn her against the Soul Society, to shape and form her into a lethal weapon, with strength possibly equal to that of a middle-ranked espada.

She was more than willing to forsake the Soul Society, save for one infuriating exception: Hitsugaya seemed determined to hinder me one way or the other. Somehow, he had a hold over Hinamori; it was irritating, for I'd never had to struggle to control her before. Once again, I knew Hitsugaya would have to die, and I again thought that it would be fitting if Hinamori were the one to do it.

Emotion provides a puppet with its strings, and Hinamori's anger at Hitsugaya made it easy for me to direct her rage into strength and a desire for revenge. But, suddenly, as quickly as I'd won her, she was gone, crying a mewling refrain of, "I can't; I can't." When all methods of persuasion had failed, I'd been furious with her, and contemplated killing her then, but quickly reconsidered. It would be a terrible waste of a tool of such strength and power. Hypnotizing her would be a nuisance – but one that was necessary.

Hitsugaya was no longer a threat to my power over Hinamori, but it would be best to kill him anyway. I didn't want to risk him posing a third impediment; as well, his death would be a blow to all the shinigami. His position and skills being so incongruent to his age had made him a subject of admiration and envy of hundreds of other shinigami, most of whom were older than him. Several theorized, not unreasonably so, that his powers may one day surpass those of Kuchiki Byakuya. It would be amusing, watching how they all reacted when one of their own killed the Gotei 13's prized prodigy.

The battle itself would hardly be worth mentioning, more a formality than an actual challenge. Between the Arrancar, the Espada, and Hinamori, the entire shinigami force would be destroyed within a number of hours, likely without myself, or even Kaname or Gin, setting foot on the battlefield.

For a moment, I closed my eyes, allowing myself to savour the feeling of near and certain triumph like a fine wine. The Ou Ken, the key to my New World, was already within my grasp.

_**Hitsugaya Tōshirō**_

__The walls, floor, ceiling and pillars of the castle were all in stark white or black, and the silver-blue shimmer of the torches cut sharply across the marble and tiles. Even the light reminded me of a blade, a zanpaku-tō, Kyōka Suigetsu, plunging through Momo's heart…

_Focus._

And I found that I could, though not without a sense of dread heavy on my shoulders. I reached out with my senses, trying to locate her reiatsu –

--without success.

_Then…she's dead?_

_No! She might be cloaking her energy! _I refused to lose faith so easily.

_Wait – there! I found her…she's alive!_

It was indeed her reiatsu…there was something strange, unfamiliar about it…but it was unmistakably Momo.

_She's alive…_

That was all I needed to know.

_**Aizen Sōsuke**_

__Hinamori knelt by the arm of my throne, her hands resting in her lap, her head bowed, her eyes closed, as she had been for hours, in a suspense of sleep. Her eyes flashed open suddenly, and she lifted her head – she had sensed the same thing I had.

_So…apparently I presumed correctly. He's come after her._

"Shall I go to meet him, Aizen-sama?"

'Yes…but I will accompany you."

This was certainly not a moment I wanted to pass by.

_**Hitsugaya Tōshirō**_

__I made my way carefully through the corridors, staying alert for Momo's reiatsu – it was a steady stream of enrgy now, and it would lead me right to her.

Only – there was someone else with her – the spiritual pressure also held a touch of something foreign, but I recognized it right away.

_Aizen…_

My hand flew to Hyōrinmaru's hilt, ans then I saw him step around the corner to meet me. Falling in step behind him was –

--it was all I could do to keep my jaw from dropping. If I hadn't known her by her reiastu, I would never have correctly guessed who it was by looking.

_Momo?_

Her skin was blanched nearly as white as the marble that surrounded her; only just enough pink remained to indicate that blood still flowed, a heart still beat. Her hair hung as a curtain of midnight over her shoulders, and she wore a long-sleeved floor-length robe that was the same material as Aizen's. Her face was the worst – it was completely lifeless, devoid of any emotion, and her eyes were wide and flat and empty.

"Hitsugaya," said Aizen, his tone cordial and a smile on his face, "what an unexpected surprise."

"Fuck that," I snarled.

Of course, Aizen was amused rather than perturbed. "You are quickly approaching your last words, Hitsugaya-kun…you may want to choose them a little more carefully."

I ignored this; I was trying to figure out what could be wrong with Momo…

"As I was saying, your being here is certainly a surprise. Fortunately, I prepared a surprise for you, too."

Momo met my eyes and smiled. "Tōshirō…how wonderful to see you again."

I'd never been more afraid of anything in my life. It was Momo's voice, but everything else – the tone, the cadence, the intonation, and the smile, that nightmare smile – was pure Aizen. My heartbeat flew into a frenzy, and I recoiled a step before regaining control and hitting Aizen with a glare full of all the rage I could summon.

_You hypnotized her…!_

"You – bastard."

Aizen's rin widened and he chuckled low in his throat. Turning to Momo, he chuckled pleasantly,

"Kill him."

Faster than I could blink, Momo was flying at me, swinging Tobiume at my throat.

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A/N: Soooooo? Was that worth waiting for? Please say yes!

How did I do with Aizen's POV? Pleeeeeeease, let me know!

As always, if I forgot to thank anybody, please tell me, and I will send you a gushing PM.

I don't really have a lot to say here…so just please review and stay tuned for:

**Chapter 16: Wake into a Nightmare**

See you next time!!!

Peace!

~Raye^^


	16. Chapter 16: Wake into a Nightmare

**Chapter Sixteen -- Wake Into a Nightmare **

A/N: Okay, so...don't get mad. But, because it's summer, I no longer have access to the school computers and must use the ones at the library. I can't get onto fanfiction on these computers, so...I can't do my thank-yous to specific people, as I can't check who did or said what.

So I'll just give you all a huge general shout-out:

_**THANK YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!**_

And I'm glad you all seemed to like how I did Aizen. Full Shadow Alchemist, your declaration of a "GIANT FREAKING CHOCLATE FOUNTAIN" is much appreciated:)

This also means, slower updates, unfortunately, as well as more spelling mistakes, because I type very badly and tend to hit a lot of wrong keys. Please, bear with me. It's just for the summer. NOOOO you shall all be saved, my beta Aleatoire – who is totally writing this right now – will save you!!! Less spelling mistakes, and hopefully more updates for Raye Lynn!!! :D

One more thing, though...I received a PM from someone who shall remain unnamed. For that person and the rest of you...when in the last chapter, Aizen was watching Momo sleep and contemplating "running her through..." I meant with his, um, zanpaku-tō. I'm not even gonna think about the other connotations there.

ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRGH!!! TOO LATE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

This is NOT a rape fic, okay? Sorry for any confusion I may have caused. – Aleatoire: LOL, SORRY HAD TO COMMENT. SEXUAL CONNOTATIONS AND ALEATOIRE = MANY LOLZ.

Hokay, so, awkward stuff outta the way...let's go! Chapter sixteen!

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Ein halber Mond versinkt vor mir/War der eben noch bei dir ?/Und hält er wirklich was er mir verspricht ?/Ich weiß, dass ich dich finden kann/hör deinen Namen im Orkan/Ich glaub noch mehr dran glauben kann ich nicht --- A half moon's fading from my sight/Isee you vision in its light/But now it's gone and left me so alone/I know I have to find you now/Can hear your name, I don't know how/Why can't we make this darkness feel like home?  
----Tokio Hotel, "Monsoon"

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You said you'd never turn your back on me/Will you stand by me or bury me?/Why don't we end this lie/I can't pretend this time/I need a friend to find/My broken mind before it falls to pieces/Every time/You try to leave me blind/You'll never close my eyes/You'll never close my eyes and watch me die  
------Billy Talent, "This Suffering"

**_Hitsugaya Tōshirō_**

_Wha--?_

I barely had time to duck to evade the strike. I drew Hyōrinmaru and was back on my feet in half a second, but the next hit was already flying at me.

_Holy shit! When did she get so fast?_

When the strike landed on my raised zanpaku-tō, the force was incredible, nearly causing my joints to buckle.

_Or so strong?_

She slid Tobiume down the length of Hyōrunmaru, smashing it into the guard. Two ends of the eight-pointed star bit into my wrist. She moved to one side, then twisted and attacked from the opposite way. I was able to deflect her blade, but she dropped one hand from the hilt and smashed her fist into my temple before spinning away again.

Blinking away the stars shooting across my vision, I saw her bringing Tobiume straight down like an axe, as if to cleave my skull in two. I blocked again, but she changed her strike so it impacted on an angle and deflected, drawing a deep gash across my upper right arm. With that same unbelievable speed, she spun around my left side to the back and drove her elbow into my shoulderblade. I couldn't hold back a yell as my shoulder dislocated.

_And her strategy's changed! Now one of my arms is injured, and the other is useless! She never used to be able to think of something like that... What if..._

_Did Aizen...?_

She was in front of me again, lashing out again; I had to defend myself by only holding Hyōrinmaru in one hand; she easily batted it away, nearly tearing it from my grip.

_...change her...?_

I had time to take one step backwards before her zanpaku-tō slashed me from my right shoulder to my left hip.

..._into a Vaizaard?_

The wound was shallow, but it burned, and Tobiume was adorned with a crimson edge of my blood.

_I have to -- disarm her -- before she kills me._

Hoping to take her by surprise, I dove forward and swung, trying to get Hyōrinmaru's flat under Tobiume's guard.

Only when it was far too late for me to check my swing did she throw her blade into the air and lunged at me, grabbing my right arm in two places -- at the wrist and just above the elbow. She drove her knee into my stomach, forcing the air from my lungs and levering me up over her shoulder; she let me go and I was airborne -- for a second I was upside down and saw her neatly catch her zanpaku-tō.

Then I hit the ground and skidded; I bit my lip to keep from yelling again as all my weight was on my dislocated shoulder.

Momo did not come at me again; instead she stood calmly and regarded me with an ironical mixture of curiosity and indifference.

'It's tragic, really," said Aizen. "I expected more of a struggle from you, Hitsugaya-kun. Or could it be that Hinamori has simply become too powerful for you?"

It was unnerving, how much effort it took me to get to my feet. "What the hell did you do to her?" I demanded.

"You worry, perhaps, that she has undergone Hollowfication? Not yet, Hitsugaya-kun -- at this stage, she has not been altered, merely refined. I am rather impressed with her improvement -- although I have to say that she would have advanced all the more quickly, now that I no longer have to struggle with you for control."

"What?! I don't try to 'control' her!"

"And yet, you manage to, all the same, and it was getting to be most irritating."

_I -- I have that kind of power over her?_

"But why are you using her to do this?" I snapped. "If you want me dead so much, why don't you kill me yourself, you filthy coward? You obviously enjoy shedding the blood of others."

Aizen smiled, shaking his head slowly. "That's were you're wrong, Hitsugaya-kun. I derive no pleasure form killing. Rather, to control those that would perform the killing, to have the lives of thousands, millions even, hang not so much on the blades of the Arrancars' zanpaku-tō so much as a single word from me, and watching the outcome of that single word be carried out by my subordinates..." his grin widened, displaying a sliver of his flawless white teeth. "I admit, I find it rather intoxicating."

"You're fucking _sick!" _I hollered.

Of course, he was unfazed. "If you're worried about Hinamori, rest assured that, once you are dead, I will lift my influence." He paused deliberately. "After altering her memories, of course, to eliminate all those that are of you."

_What?!_

_No!_

If my death could solve what I'd done to hurt Momo, then fine. I wouldn't complain. But now -- if I fell to her, it would be as though I'd never existed, and she would have no one, nothing to quell her infatuation with Aizen. She would be an unquestioning, subservient slave to his whims for the rest of her life...

_That can't happen!_

I bounded forward and charged --

---at Aizen.

_You fucking bastard; I'm not going to let you --_

He didn't make a move to stop me -- although Momo leaping in my path may have counted...

As if reading my thoughts, Aizen interjected, "I hope you realize that she would have done that even had she not been under my power."

"That's because you've been brainwashing her from the start, you son of a --" My expletive was cut short as Momo lashed out at me, clubbing me in the head with her foot and knocking me to the ground. I leapt back up...

"Resume," said Aizen softly. "And this time...don't hold back."

_...'don't hold back'?!_

Momo reached up and unclasped her robe, letting it fall to the floor in a pool of silk around her ankles. Underneath, she wore an outfit better suited for combat -- a sleeveless, midriff-baring shirt, silk gauntlets that encased her forearms, and flared pants that were loose enough to move in, yet tight enough so as not to create drag; all of this was in the same balc-trimmed white material. On her feet, instead of tabi and sandals, she wore black slippers similar to those favoured by Soi Fong.

She came at me, even faster than before, if that were possible, swinging Tobiume like a deranged creature. Only sheer instinct allowed me to block the next several blows, delivered in rapid succession.

I couldn't go on like this; my one useable arm was weakening rapidly. I needed both...

"Hadō 18: gōruden byaya!" I proclaimed, and twenty sphere of light shot towards Momo.

She didn't miss a beat. "Hadō 47: ōmen-no-toku [concave shield]!" she responded, and the spheres bounced off the curved-inwards barrier that had appeared in front of her, coming back towards me.

But I'd already bought all the time I needed; with my right hand I'd found the proper placement as best as I could guess, and popped my shoulder back into place. Intense pain flared up for a moment, then quickly subsided to a dull throbbing. I cut off the flow of reiatsu to the spheres, and they vanished.

It wouldn't be enough, though. If I was going to win this, I need a fresh burst of strength...

**"Reign across the frozen heavens, Hyōrinmaru!" **I called. New, fresh waves of reiatsu flowed through my limbs, quelling the worst of the bleeding and pain and relieving some of my fatigue.

Momo frowned. "**Snap, Tobiume!**"

Apparently there would be no advantage to be gained here. Momo shot a fireball from her zanpaku-tō and it flew at me nearly as quickly as a shun-po.

"**Ryuusenka!**" I responded, bringing Hyōrinmaru down. The fireball froze on contact and, falling to the floor in two halves, shattered.

Undaunted, she shot another at me, the shun-poed behind my back and fired another.

I threw myself to the ground and rolled; the two fireballs met in mid-air and exploded; I could feel the heat even from several feet away.

I was barely on my feet again when Momo lashed out and trapped Hyōrinmaru between two of Tobiume's three prongs; her twisted Tobiume, and my zanpaku-tō was torn from my grip and went sailing into the air.

She went for a stab, but I leapt into the air and flew over her shoulder, hitting the ground, somersaulting, and scooping up my blade again. I turned around; she was right there, jamming her fist into my solar plexus; I staggered back, choking and gasping for air and barely managed to block the next hit.

She was too fast, far too fast, and too strong; the muscles in my left shoulder were seizing up around the inflamed joint, making my movements slow and awkward, not to mention painful.

I struck out wildly to crate a diversion, then spun away and around her in a shun-po. I had gained the few crucial second I needed to cast a kidō...

"Bakudō 61: Rikudō Kōrō!" I yelled.

"Hadō 102: kidō hikikaeru!" Momo cried, and, though I felt the drain on my reiatsu, my kidō attack failed to take form.

_Hadō 102?_

_Well...Hadō 101 was Arusorasakeru...so she's gone from simply combining kidō to creating new ones entirely...I never would have thought it was possible._

But this...this was my chance. I knew from casting the Skyrender myself that these new kidō took much more strength than the ordinary spells of the demon arts. Momo would be weaker for a short time...now was my chance to use the one weapon remaining to me, the one she didn't have...

"**Bankai! Daiguren, Hyōrinamru!" **

Once again, I was relieved by the amount of strength flowing through me. Seeming to come along with this new surge of energy was clarity of thought; I now had a new strategy: all I had to do was immobilize Momo, then cast the Skyrender again to take us both back. Once she was safe, I would come back and kill Aizen...

"Hadō 11: Tsuzuri Raiden!" cried Momo, but I hadn't to make a move nor utter a sound. The chains that whipped out of nowhere froze and shattered upon contact with my reiatsu.

She came at me in a flying kick, but I simply curved one of my wings around me to act as a shield; she bounced off, sprawling to the floor. She was up again in the space of a heartbeat, but I was ready.

"**Sennen Hyōrō!**" I yelled. Every molecule of water in the air rushed toward Momo and froze. I shaped the pillars so she would not be harmed, merely imprisoned. Within seconds, she was trapped in a lidded box of ice, made translucent by the light streaming in from the window. I could see her pacing around, trying to find a way out, in vain.

But I knew I hadn't won. Something wasn't right.

_If Momo just lost...shouldn't Aizen be intervening?_

But he instead impaled Sennen Hyōrō with a glare, his features betraying the slightest hint of annoyance.

"I believe I said," he pronounced deliberately, "'don't hold back'."

There was a moment's pause, a long instant of stillness and silence.

And then Sennen Hyōrō exploded, blown to pieces by a massive purple shockwave, the force of which sent me reeling backwards.

_No...impossible..._

Momo calmly walked from the debris, holding Tobiume in a relaxed grip at her side.

"Is that what qualifies one to be a prodigy, much less a captain of the Gotei 13?" Momo asked airily. "It's pathetic, really. A sad, pathetic joke. I refuse to partake in this any longer than is necessary."

I turned to face Aizen. "Quit talking to me through her!" I snapped. "If you want to gloat, say it yourself!"

His eyes glittered. "You want that she acts like herself? I can do that," he said carelessly, "although it takes more effort..." Though he made no visible motion nor any audible command, I felt a definite shift in the air. When I turned back to Momo, I was stunned by the bright, alert expression in her eyes and the smile on her face -- it looked just like the Momo I knew. If I hadn't known better, I'd have said Aizen had released her...

"Tōshirō?" she said, and her voice was her own again. "Tōshirō, tell me," she said, her voice dripping with innocence. "How does it feel...knowing you're about to die?"

I glared at Aizen as I responded. "I'll let you know when I get to that point."

Aizen smiled, his sickening smile, and Momo laughed, her own light, carefree, musical laugh -- the one sound in the world capable of 'melting' my so-called heart of ice...

"Oh, Tōshirō," said Momo sweetly. "You never did like to admit defeat, did you? Well, I suppose there's never really been a need before, has there? But...there's a first time for everything."

With that, she loosed another reiatsu burst, even stronger than the last one. The raw, untamed energy picked me up and smashed me into one of the pillars; the marble was crushed to pieces, half-burying me in the rubble. I fought to breathe; all my wounds had re-opened and there was definitely damage inside of me as well; I could taste the metallic blood creeping up my throat.

Momo looked at me with satisfaction, but she did not wait for me to climb out of the rocks before levelling her zanpaku-tō at me and pronouncing,

**"Bankai."**

----------------------

A/N: There ya have it! Chapter sixteen...sorry for the long wait, peeps.

NEXT CHAPTER: MOMO/SHIRO BATTLE PART TWO!

Please keep those reviews coming; your criticism means sooooooooooooooo much to me. Thank you, thank you, for all your support and see y'all next chapter! Oh, and thank you to Aleatoire too, for beta-ing, updating for me, and plugging herself shamelessly (LIKE TWILIGHT, FLUFF, SILLINESS AND LOLZ? GO SEE .net/~aleatoire). MUAHAHAHA. SORRY.

~Raye Lynne^^


	17. Chapter 17: Fall From the Sky

A/N: So, chapter seventeen...here we go, a lot sooner than expected. Don't expect this to be consistent here...if it is, it is, and if it ain't...well, you know.

But, thank you to everybody who reviewed/faved/subscribed since last chapter, and I will name you all specifically when I get the chance to be running my own stories again. In the meantime, thank you to Aleatoire for posting this for me.

Anyways...this chapter is epic! Hope you enjoy...please keep those reviews coming; even if I can't thank you by name, I greatly value your responses!

~Raye:)

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**Chapter Seventeen -- Fall From The Sky**

Fear is what makes us vulnerable, and vulnerability is what opens us to love and trust, and inevitably, pain -- but it is what makes us human. No one fears nothing. ---Rylan Hornall

I dream in darkness/I sleep to die/Erase the silence/Erase my life -- Evanescence, "Sweet Sacrifice"

Some say the world will end in fire/Some say in ice/From what I've tasted of desire/I hold with those who favour fire ---"Fire and Ice" Robert Frost

_**Hitsugaya Tōshirō**_

I am an idiot.

How could I not have guessed it? Here was Momo, outrunning me, out-striking me, throwing punches and kicks like the best fighters in our militia force, and _inventing new kidō -- _and I didn't see it coming until it was too late.

Of course, it would make sense that she had bankai. I should have known.

She would not stop until she killed me, and she had no way of knowing that my death would condemn her to a life of servitude to a sadistic madman. Was she not better off dead herself than subjected to such a fate?

But, even if I could have brought myself to harm her in any way, I had the impression now that I wouldn't be physically strong enough.

The only other time I'd felt so powerless was when I'd seen her lying broken and bloodied in the Central 46 Chambers, thinking her dead, killed by the very man who now controlled her, body and soul, animating her for the soul purpose of taking my life --

_So this is what true fear feels like._

_**Hinamori Momo**_

_I see you._

_I see your fear._

_You can't hide._

_You. _

_Enemy._

_Observe. Strategize. Calculate._

_Ready..._

_Kill him, Momo._

_Yes, Aizen-sama._

_Attack._

_Be merciless. Don't hold back._

_Kill him, Momo._

_Yes, Aizen-sama._

_I see your fear, your pain._

_Your blood._

_Your blood as I hurt you, more blood to come as I drive a blade through your heart._

_Your heart...your hurt, your pain..._

_Pain..._

_Pain...hurt...a heart..._

_...a...memory...?_

_Don't remember._

_...but..._

_Don't remember._

_Yes, Aizen-sama._

_**Hitsugaya Tōshirō**_

**"Bankai! Murasaki-no-sazanami, **[violet blossom ripple] **Tobiume!"**

Tobiume fused back into a single slender, silver blade that shone like a diamond. The guard was a twisted ring wrought in black metal, and was woven with the same flowering vine that was now wrapped around the hilt.

And...

_...wings...!_

Momo had wings -- enormous, magnificent, black-rimmed, black-veined wings that shimmered a dozen shades of violet. I could not help but be in awe at their splendour -- and power. Her reiatsu force made the very air heavier.

Instinctively, I pulled myself free of the stone wreckage and took flight, but, with a flutter of her own wings, Momo was right with me, and I had lost a huge advantage -- while all shinigami, as well as Arrancar, could hover in the air while fighting, there was as much a difference between that and truly flying as between walking and dancing. My bankai was one of the very few that provided its wielder with wings...

In a frenzy we circled each other, trying to gain altitude. She made it higher first, though; levelling Tobiume down at me, she cried,**" Hishizuku arashi **[flame drop maelstrom]**!"**

Her wings seemed to shimmer, and then they were on fire. They maintained their shape and even their colour, but they were unmistakeably burning. Small bits of flame detached and shaped themselves into small five-petalled flowers, leaving the wings slightly smaller than before. All this took barely a second, then the flame-flowers shot at me.

Where they hit my robes, they set them alight, but where they hit my skin, they seemed to burrow deep down into the tissue, burning their way through me. It was excruciating; the pain was so intense that I was only dimly aware of myself yelling. An entire one of my Daiguren ice flowers shattered.

Harnessing my reiatsu, I extinguished the flames, but the effort was so much that two more icy petals burst into pieces. My bankai was half-over, but...

I glanced at my injuries, expected by the levels of pain to have my limbs be little more than strips of charred flesh hanging off the bones. In fact, there were only some angry blistered patches separated by streaks of soot.

_That's not a good thing...it's misleading; designed to make me think I'm less hurt than I actually am..._

The sleeve and upper left half of my shihakushō had been completely burned away, and, as I watched, there was a curious prickling sensation and a blood-red, flame shaped burn seemed to bloom from a smear of ash on my chest.

Another Daiguren petal was broken.

Momo, seeming pleased with herself, repeated the attack.

"**Guncho Tsurara!" **I hollered, and frantically wheeled in the air. My defence extinguished some, but not all, of her attack, and about half of those remaining seemed to change direction and hone in on me. Then pain was less, but it was still agony, and another Daiguren petal smashed.

There was that prickling again -- I looked down at my chest to see another flame-shaped burn coming from the ash smear, right next to the first. This time I realized -- they were petals. From the space that was left, I guessed that there would be five in total. Presumably, when the circle was complete...I would die.

Momo shot through the air at me -- my wings couldn't be my shield; she came too fast. She smashed her feet into the left side of my ribcage, shattering most of the bones in that half. I coughed, feeling flecks of hot blood against my lips...and a prickling on my chest...

Again, she seemed to come from nowhere, this time snapping my left collarbone in two; once again, my left arm hung uselessly.

My head was spinning; my limbs felt weighted. I could barely move, barely breathe...petals three and four unfurled on my chest, and I had only one Daiguren petal remaining to me. With the flower on me counting up, and the flower behind me counting down, it amounted to the same thing: I didn't have long to live.

As if from far away, I heard Momo intone the name of her zanpaku-tō, and an enormous purple fireball came at me.

With the last of my strength, I shot into the air, arcing and swerving, but, again, the fireball seemed to change direction to follow me, and I was swallowed up inside it.

It was worse than the flame drops, a hundred times worse. The heat was blinding, crippling, suffocating, melting my wings...my very bones. The heat, the burning -- the _agony _was incomprehensible, by far the worst trial I'd ever endured. The last fragment of pride I still possessed prayed that no one else could hear me screaming...

_**Hinamori Momo**_

_You are breakable, and I have broken you._

_Your yells of pain show your weakness._

_You've never made that sound before._

_..._

_...?_

_...how do I know that...?_

_Do I...know you?_

_Never mind that._

_But I...I..._

_Kill him, Momo._

_Yes, Aizen-sama._

_**Hitsugaya Tōshirō**_

The fireball exploded. The force of it jerked my body in all directions, threatening to tear off my limbs. More heat, more burning...my last Daiguren petal was vapourized and my wings were blown to bits, pelting me with chunks and shards before being maelted by the lethal heat...Hyōrinmaru, too, was reduced to dust in my hand.

I fell; I barely felt the impact as I hit the ground, as it did not even begin to compare to the rest of my pain. I lay, unable to move. There was hardly a patch of my skin that was not black or red from the bruises, burns, and blood. What was left of my haori was burned as black as the shredded remains of my shihakushō. My broken body was nearly falling on itself, threatening to crush my internal organs...those that were still intact, at least...

I felt the last petal in its prickling bloom.

I waited for the end -- but it didn't come.

I thought then of how, after the first petal, all her attacks, even her flying kicks, targeted my left side, as though the blood-red flower was like a homing device for her attacks.

The completed flower was situated directly above my heart. I knew that, whatever she decided to hit me with now, it would be fatal -- and it would be impossible for her to miss.

She dragged me to my feet again, only to throw me back down on all fours. She got behind me, and, yanking my hair, pulled me into a kneeling position, exposing my throat.

Resting Tobiume's edge against the brittle skin, she said, in her 'Aizen'-voice, "Do you have anything to say for yourself, Hitsugaya?"

..._I love you._

But there was no point in saying it -- it wouldn't be Momo who heard me.

For some reason, though, I couldn't bring myself to stop looking into her eyes, searching for the real Momo behind those impassive black shells.

Torturing myself like that -- I was either a fool or a masochist, possibly both. But I couldn't stop...

_**Hinamori Momo**_

_...I know those eyes._

_I know their shape, their colour, their intensity._

_I know the feelings behind them._

_I see your pain, your hurt. From the body, but also the heart._

_I can see myself reflected in your eyes now, just as I could when you made me feel what you are feeling now. That's how I know._

_You hurt me._

_And now I have hurt you._

_But it's not the same._

_You hurt me with your words, not your zanpaku-tō._

_So...I know you._

_How else could you have hurt my heart like you did? You have to know someone very well to hurt their heart..._

_So who are you?_

_It doesn't matter who he is. You don't know him._

_But I do!_

_No._

_...yes. Aizen-sama...you can tell me I don't, but I do! You can tell me I don't...but saying it doesn't make it true..._

_Kill him, Momo._

_He hurt me with his words, not his zanpaku-tō. He didn't fight me now. He should have known he would get hurt._

_But he didn't fight._

_Why?_

_Why did he come here, to those that would hurt him?_

_Kill him, Momo._

_But I have to know._

_I ask._

_Why are you here?_

_You surprise me with your answer. With the amount of ferocity you are still able to summon, and also the answer itself._

_"Why do you think?!"_

_Why do I think?_

_Why _**_do_**_ I think?_

_Do I think?_

_Don't think. Kill him, Momo._

_I--_

_Momo. Kill. Him. NOW._

_..._

_**Aizen Sōsuke**_

_What is this? This has never happened..._

_Hitsugaya must somehow be--_

_Damn...it..._

_Kill him, Momo. Kill him now!_

_**Hinamori Momo**_

_Who are you?_

_You are -- Tōshirō. I know that. But who is Tōshirō?_

_Tō..shi...rō..._

_...I...remember..._

_Tō...shi...rō...chan?_

_No, that's not right..._

_'Shiro-chan...?_

_Shiro-chan!_

_I remember!_

_You, Tōshirō..._

_I love you._

_I remember now._

_And I remember how you hurt me._

_Yes. He hurt you. He must be punished._

_But we all make mistakes._

_I made a mistake._

_I shouldn't have left, shouldn't have led you here, Tōshirō, to your death..._

_Kill him, Momo._

_But I can't, Aizen-sama._

_Forget everything. Forget it all._

_I can't._

_None of it matters._

_That's -- that's --_

_...that's a lie._

_Telling a lie doesn't change what's true. It may hide the truth, but it doesn't change it._

_And I know the truth._

_So...why are you lying to me, Aizen-sama?_

_Why?_

_Take your zanpaku-tō. Slit his throat. It's easy. Kill him, Momo._

_...why?_

_**Hitsugaya Tōshirō**_

_Why am I not dead yet?_

I was still a prisoner; Tobiume was still at my throat, but Momo made no movement, save for the clenching and unclenching of the tendons in her arms.

For some reason, Aizen's reiatsu was becoming more palpable. After several long moments, he gave an audible command.

"What are you waiting for, Hinamori? Finish him, now!"

It was the first time I had ever heard Aizen raise his voice above norm al speaking level.

_A sign of...panic?_

Doubtful. It was more than likely he was just toying with me in my last moments, trying to give me false hope...

Looking up, though, I saw Momo's features contort, as if in pain. Very suddenly, she raised Tobiume --

--and the blade clattered to the floor several feet away.

Just as suddenly, she shoved me away, and I was locked fast in a column of translucent blue light.

I could see her through the light; I could not hear her, but her lips were forming the word, "Go; go."

She'd cast toku keta around me; doubtless she wanted me to perform the Skyrender and escape.

I had to marvel. Momo -- she'd just done the impossible. Somehow...inexplicably...she'd forced Aizen to relinquish his hold on her, broken his 'perfect hypnosis'. And now, though she'd been trying to kill me seconds ago, she was helping me to escape.

However, even if I'd had the strength to cast the kidō, I wouldn't have left, for Aizen was advancing on her. His gait was casual and unhurried, but his eyes flared with an ember of deeply suppressed fury.

I couldn't tell what he said to her, but Momo kept repeating, 'I can't; I can't." Finally, she shook her head, set her shoulders, and, after a moment's hesitation, changed her declaration: "I _won't."_

There was a pause.

Then, faster than lightning, Aizen drew his zanpaku-tō.

I gave a strangled yell of rage as Kyōka Suigetsu flashed back and forth three times, spraying the ground with red beads, and Momo dropped to the ground, curled up into a ball and shaking.

For obvious reasons, Momo's concentration was broken, and the shield around me vanished. I stumbled forward, then caught myself, by anger making me forget my pain and exhaustion.

"_You fucking bastard, what did you do to her?!" _I demanded.

"See for yourself," Aizen replied airily. He reached down and hauled Momo to her feet. She staggered and only stayed standing because he was holding onto her. Blood curtained down from two deep gashes above her right hipbone and left collarbone. My heart jolted, for I could not see her third wound, but her right hand was desperately clamped to her face.

Aizen gave her a shake. "Go on, show him." His tone was pleasant, cheerful almost, but I sensed a snarl buried in his words. Momo, still trembling, tried to pull away; Aizen grabbed her by the wrist and tore her hand away from her face.

My breath caught in my throat. This wound was fairly shallow and little more than an inch long, but it was directly under her eye. If it had been any higher up, it would have torn her eye right out.

"Ah,' said Aizen carelessly. "I missed."

If Hyōrinmaru hadn't shattered, he would not have lived another second. My limbs were rigid with fury, so much so that I could not focus on re-forming my zanpaku-tō, and there was barely enough water in the air even...

"No matter," Aizen continued. "I shall expend no more of my efforts on you," he said to Momo. "You are useless to me now, save for one last thing...however--" his eyes came to rest on me and narrowed slightly -- "there are other matters that must first be dealt with."

_Dammit...in this state, I no better off trying to fight Aizen than Momo -- but I've got no choice..._

_Momo..._

_I think she finally knows...she understands enough to know that she needs to get away from here. If I can hold out long enough for her to escape, then --_

Aizen held Kyōka Suigetsu loosely at his side; his other hand still held Momo by a wrist.

Seemingly as an afterthought, the fingers on this hand expertly flexed and twisted, and Momo let out an ear-splitting scream -- but not before I heard the sound of her wrist bones shattering. His expression indifferent, Aizen flung her aside; Momo was slammed to the floor, crying out again as her mutilated arm smacked against the marble.

I was no longer in control of myself. There was an explosion that ripped through the stone and tiles, reducing them to dust. For a second, I was exposed to the glaring heat of Hueco Mundo's sun, before all was swallowed up in cold clouds and freezing wind. I was surrounded by a think blue-white light; I couldn't see...

When it all died down, I looked around and saw that the blast had destroyed not just the one room, but every part of the castle within a hundred and fifty feet; several small white figures were standing, exposed, looking to see what was going on. All the wreckage was flattened and coated in a shimmering layer of ice. The air was frigid, and a newly re-formed Hyōrinmaru blazed defiantly in my hand.

_Maybe I have a chance after all. If I only reign in my reiatsu enough to keep from hurting Momo...and don't hold anything else back..._

Aizen, damn him, appeared surprised but unhurt. As for Momo, I though I saw her stirring, but I couldn't be sure, as it was hard to see through the snow --

_Snow?!_

_Snow...and…ice..._

I was paralyzed with horror -- I had just realized where I was.

_Endless white_

_Silvery light_

_Stretching out around me_

_Crystalline_

_Glassy sheen_

_All I know is what surrounds me_

_Steady and slow_

_The sleet and the snow_

_Through the cold air fly_

_Many a time I've walked this plain_

_And..._

_Every time..._

_I've seen myself... _

_Die._

_-------------------------_  
A/N: Mwahahahaha, it just doesn't get any better for poor Shiro, does it? Wahaha, I feel evil, mwahaha.

Sooooooooooo, how'd ya like Momo's bankai? Tell me, please!

Oh, and just so you know, when Aizen says Momo is only good for "one last thing", IT'S NOT PERVERTED, OKAY?! Yeesh. Yech.

Knowing that also may give you a hint as to what it is. Well, you probably don't need a hint; I think it's pretty obvious. But there is a slight possibility that it's just me.

I will not give you a preview of the next chapter. That would completely defeat the purpose of having a next chapter, wouldn't it? I will guarantee you this, however:

YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT IS COMING. Not a single one of you will guess.

There. How's that to torture ya? Heehee.

~Till next time,

~Raye Lynne


	18. Chapter 18: No Such Thing as Forever

A/N: Once more, another chapter where I am not able to thank people in specific, but I have more people to add to my list that require said thank-yous for when I have regular internet access once more.

So, thank-yous, large hugs, and a box of Lucky Charms for all of you!

As well, another very special thank you to Aleatoire, without whom you would not be reading this. DAMN STRAIGHT! AHAHAHA, thanks Raye-Lynne ^_^

For this chapter, Skalag and Scarran return! As well, we meet a new OC of mine---one that I absolutely adore. I mean, he's horrible, and I hate him, but his actual character, in my opinion, is something of a work of art. I love him, and hope to bring him back at least once later on.

As well, I took a couple small liberties with some 'facts' about zanpaku-tō and kidō which may or may not be accurate, just to warn you.

And...well... that's really all there is to say. I can't put it off any longer. Here it goes with the chapter...O! My heart bleeds for you all...

----------------

**Chapter 18 -- No Such Thing As Forever**

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Whisper; whisper; don't make a sound/Your bed is made; it's in the ground. -- Billy Talent, "Devil in a Midnight Mass"

---------------------

_**Hinamori Momo**_

_The pain..._

My body, my mind, my heart, my soul...

_It hurts; it hurts..._

_A--_

_Ai--_

_Aizen-sama..._

_No. Not "-sama". Not anymore._

_They were right. They were all right._

_Only now I see...and it's too late..._

_Tōshirō!_

That one word, that name, brought me back to myself, shutting out all else...for now.

_I have to help him! He'll be killed for following me here, unless --_

I tried to struggle to my feet. I was dizzy, though, and my right wrist hung uselessly.

A malicious little voice sounded in my thoughts: _Your 'Aizen-sama' did that to you..._

Tears sprang to my eyes, but I bit my lip, keeping most of them back, and I kept trying to stand -- only to be knocked back down by a tremendous explosion.

When it was all over, it was below freezing, and everything glittered with a layer of ice. As well, it was snowing, the large white crystals seeming almost too silent as they fell.

_Silent as the dead, _said the malicious voice. _One of them is going to die, you know._

I knew. It was like my nightmares, although we were surrounded by white, not black. Tōshirō and Aizen-sa---...were going to fight.

And I didn't want either of them to die.

Certainly not Tōshirō.

And also…not Aizen. Even after everything, to have the man I'd all but worshipped for as long as I could remember killed before my eyes would be more than I could bear.

_If I can get to Tōshirō, we can escape together..._

But I was dazed from the explosion, and the sudden drop in temperature seemed to have locked my joints, and I could do little more than stir feebly.

_Wait...Tobiume! Where are you?_

I couldn't leave here without Tobiume; it wasn't physically possible. Since a zanpaku-tō is part of a shinigami's own spirit energy, the two cannot be separated across dimensions; if I tried to go now, I would be bound to stay until Tobiume was in my hand again.

There--it was only a short distance away, but I could tell that it was half-frozen to the ground; only a portion of the hilt remained free. Finding myself still too unstable to stand, I half-crawled, half-dragged myself to where it lay...

_**Hitsugaya Tōshirō**_

As he slowly approached me, Aizen glanced around him, seeming unimpressed.

'What is this? The shinigami equivalent of a temper tantrum?" he sneered.

'It's a graveyard," I replied levelly.

_...My own, that is, if my premonition is correct._

_But the future can be changed._

_I will show no fear._

Well, it was too late for that, unfortunately...

_But I will stand tall, regain control, and redeem myself. I will never bow to this man, this monster._

_Never._

"A graveyard," I repeated. "Yours. I'm going to kill you."

He only smiled. "Powerful words, Hitsugaya. However, we both know what happened the last time you said that."

**_Hinamori Momo_**

I could hear them. Every word. And the last words from Aizen puzzled me for a moment.

But not for long.

_Oh, god...when he found me after Aizen -- he must've..._

Tōshirō had never told me he'd nearly died, too.

_Why didn't he say something?_

Would it have made a difference, though?

If I'd known that, would I have realized the truth sooner?

We'd never know...

_**Hitsugaya Tōshirō**_

"But I lived," I retorted. "Can you say I was given a second chance for nothing?"

Aizen shook his head.

"You were merely lucky, Hitsugaya. You and Hinamori should have died, and would have, had you not been found by Unohana and Kotetsu -- pure coincidence."

'Coincidence, luck -- they don't exist. I lived, and I'm here now because I was meant to defeat you," I countered.

Where did all the words come from anyway? Despite that every other word was a contradiction of the last, I might have even believed what I was saying, had I not been standing in the centre of the stage set for my death scene.

**_Hinamori Momo_**

Tobiume was barely budging as I tugged with all the strength in my left arm. I could have used a kidō, but I didn't want to distract Tōshirō, as Aizen may then attack him. I doubled my efforts, every few seconds glancing back at the two. By the looks and sounds of it, they were getting dangerously close to beginning to fight each other.

_I have to hurry!_

_**Hitsugaya Tōshirō**_

"I've never been one for sentimental banter of 'destiny', 'providence', and such," said Aizen. "It seems to me a last grasping attempt for someone whose luck has expired. But we will soon see..." he smiled again, and something in that smile made me raise Hyōrinmaru, with my one useable arm, in front of me.

My heart was pounding furiously, sending blood roaring through my ears.

_We will soon see..._

_**Hinamori Momo**_

I saw the flash of Tōshirō's zanpaku-tō out of the corner of my eye. I quickly turned to look. Tōshirō had assumed a combat posture, and Aizen was circling around him.

But--Tōshirō kept staring at the spot where Aizen had been standing, almost as though--

_Could it be--he can't see him...?_

I cried out as loudly as I could:

_**Hitsugaya Tōshirō**_

_"Behind you, Tōshirō!!!"_

In that same instant, Aizen vanished, even though I'd been looking right at him.

I did not think, but acted right away; I sprang into the air -- for it is much harder to check a swing upwards than down and still be accurate. I felt a rush of air an inch below my feet -- a strike that would have separated my head from my shoulders had Momo not warned me.

_How can she see him, but not me?_

Then I understood.

_That's how it works! He makes his opponent hallucinate to think he's somewhere he's not, then he cloaks his reiatsu and attacks from behind...and Momo can see him still because she broke his hypnosis..._

I landed, sliding backwards on the ice, sending up a spray of snow. Aizen was regarding Momo with an irritable distaste.

"That will now be all from you," he said coldly.

Suddenly, I heard Momo gasp, and there were sounds of a struggle. Though it was the worst possible thing to do, I took my eyes off of Aizen to look...

_**Hinamori Momo**_

No sooner had Tōshirō's name left my tongue than a huge hand clapped over my mouth. I struggled to get free, but something heavy pressed down on the backs of my knees, keeping me down. My left arm was twisted behind my back and I was forced to sit up, being pulled so roughly that my spine was beginning to bend the wrong way.

Hot breath formed words in my ear. "Long time no see, eh, nina?"

_Skalag..._

And another voice, cool and mocking. "Welcome to the feeling of having fallen from favour."

_Scarran..._

"Good to see you again," said Skalag. "We've been looking forward to this for a while."

'Indeed," said Scarran with a mirthless smile. "We finally get to make you suffer for our humiliation."

I could feel the tips of his long, talon-like nails brushing over my face. I shivered with revulsion and tried to pull away, but Skalag's thick fingers held me tighter and the nails, with one sudden and vicious swipe, tore stinging lines across my face.

**_Hitsugaya Tōshirō_**

_Those bastards...!_

Then I dropped into a crouch, spinning and slashing at Achilles' tendon-level, but Aizen had already back-stepped away again.

"Coward," I spat. "Going for the kill when your opponent is distracted -- for some reason I expected more from you, although I haven't the faintest idea why."

Once again, the outburst seemed to fall on deaf ears.

"What does it matter?" Aizen replied. "The end result for you is inevitable, no matter how one goes about it." He smiled patronizingly. "However, if it is traditional combat you desire, then that is what you shall have."

He swung at me at a deliberate speed: too quick for me to dodge, but slow enough for me to block it easily.

Well...not easily. I angled Hyōrinmaru in a one-armed defence, and the impact jolted me all the way down the metal and through the bones in my arm; my shoulder almost buckled under the force.

_Holy hellfire; he's strong!_

_...And he's just playing with me now..._

So I did the only thing I could do--I lashed out with Hyōrinmaru, swinging with all my might.

_**Hinamori Momo**_

I was helpless.

Though it was possible to cast a kidō without saying the words, it required enormous concentration, which I could not summon through the pain.

Even if I could do something, though -- what would I do? I couldn't escape so long as Tobiume was trapped under the ice -- and what could I do for Tōshirō? I'd put the shield around him earlier, but he did nothing.

Could it be he didn't have the strength left?

Or...could it be...he didn't want to leave me behind...

He had come back for me, after all...

_Maybe...he really does...love me...?_

I was hit with the sudden realization that he had never said either way, when he easily could have.

_He never said he __didn't__ love me..._

_So why, oh why, did I leave? I'm so blind; I overreacted; I'm such an idiot..._

And I could only watch as Tōshirō struggled to hold his ground fighting what was, in his battered and exhausted state, a futile battle, because he followed me here; he followed me in my stubborn and reckless foolishness...

I was riveted in terrible fascination: I was seized with the fear that I would see him die, but what if his life ended the moment I looked away? I didn't know what would be worse; I couldn't choose...

The choice was made for me as a third Arrancar stepped into my line of vision.

I felt a look of surprise cross my face before I could stop it. He was quite young -- only a few years older than me, I guessed. He had a gently angled face with almost feminine features, and a thick skein of hair of the palest grey, so pale it was nearly white. His hair, which rested over his brow and brushed the nape of his neck, had the strangest float-y texture, almost like cobwebs, so that I could see nearly every individual strand. His wide, sparkling eyes were a very dark blue and set low on his face, giving him a childlike appearance. Oddly, his pale skin seemed almost to glow, as if lit from within. Overlapping plates of bone formed gauntlets over his arms, covering only the backs of his long, slender hands. Loose white pants and a sleeveless shirt clothed his tall, lithe, graceful-looking frame.

He was--beautiful. There was simply no other word for it.

Skalag and Scarran seemed puzzled by his arrival.

"What are you doing here, Mariioqa?" asked Skalag.

To my surprise, there was no derision or impatience in his voice -- it was a perfectly civil question. Skalag _respected _this Arrancar -- Mariioqa.

That meant I should fear him.

When he spoke, his voice was light and clear and almost musical; every word out of his mouth sounded like liquid.

"Chaos has its way of uniting, despite all else," he replied. "Whether through fear, grieving, or simply...curiosity..." His enormous eyes flicked for an instant to the battle going on behind him, then came to linger on me. I stared back, then immediately began to feel dizzy and light-headed.

"Is she not capable of standing?" he asked, sounding concerned.

Skalag and Scarran were speechless. I suppressed a shiver, remembering how Aizen had said something similar when Ichimaru had brought me to him when I'd first arrived.

'Why not let her go?" suggested Mariioqa. 'She's hardly worth such barbaric measures of restraint...she's only a girl, after all."

After a pause, Skalag let me go, and both he and Scarran stepped back.

Slowly and shakily, I got to my feet, but I was buying myself time to prepare a kidō. As soon as I reached my full height, I cried, "Hadō----!"

Mariioqa slowly, almost lazily, leaned forward and lightly placed a long, tapered finger on my lips. "Shhhhh..." he said softly, and my lips and tongue were suddenly numb.

Just like that, I'd been rendered mute. My heartbeat shuddered in fear.

Mariioqa didn't move his finger; he leaned in so close to me that I could feel his breath like the touch of a feather on my face when he spoke next.

"You used to be a sort of pet for Aizen-sama," he said, matter-of-factly, yet his voice was tinged with pity. "But now you're not. You're worthless, useless, powerless, a broken plaything, used and tossed aside."

His words were horrible, mocking and malevolent. And yet, he managed to sound innocent and empathetic, his unguarded wide-eyed stare boring into me. His beautiful face melted into a facade of sympathy.

"I know how you feel."

He made it so hard to _not _believe him, somehow...

'You see," he said, softly and confidentially, "I should be an Espada. But I'm too different--I don't have a zanpaku-tō, you understand. My gifts, though remarkable--" he traced his finger down my lips -- "require--" he flicked his finger off the end of my chin -- "direct physical contact." With an almost imperceptible touch, he placed the same finger on the centre of my forehead.

I couldn't help but gasp -- though I could feel that all my powers of speech had returned, all of my energy seemed to drain away into nothingness. My reiatsu had been suppressed, and my physical strength vanished entirely. My legs buckled and I fell.

Effortlessly, Mariioqa caught me, with one arm gently around my waist. With his other hand, he roughly seized my broken wrist. The contrast was so startling that it added to the pain, and I cried out shrilly.

**_Hitsugaya Tōshirō_**

_Momo...!_

For an instant, every fibre of my being was focused on her.

That instant was plenty for Aizen to hit me across my upper arm.

The wound was even worse than the one I'd received from Momo -- the tricep muscle was half-severed, and my blood rained down and stained the ice at my feet.

**_Hinamori Momo_**

Mariioqa's eyes went even wider, his lips parted in concern. "I'm sorry," he said, sounding surprised and appalled with himself. "Did that hurt you?"

He was trying to hide it, but a small smile was playing around his lips. He knew perfectly well that he had hurt me, and it had been intentional. I remained silent.

He set me back on my feet, but kept my right forearm in a loose, one-handed grip.

"I find it interesting that the little boy over there got hurt when you did," he noted.

_He's not a 'little boy', anyway, you're not much older..._ this was easier to think about than the fact that Tōshirō just got hurt...

"Very interesting," he repeated. His childlike eyes shone with curiosity. 'I wonder if it will work again..."

I tore my arm away and steeped back, but Skalag and Scarran were there, holding me in place and pinning my left arm down. Mariioqa advanced on me slowly, smiling, for all appearances benign and innocent.

He reached forward, grabbing my arm with both hands -- and twisted, wrenching my arm one way and my hand the other. It was all I could do not to shriek in agony.

He did it again and again, harder each time.

_Oh god, it hurts; it hurts; it hurts..._

It was a pain that shot all the way up my arm, through my shoulder and down to skewer me directly through the heart.

_Your 'Aizen-sama' did that to you..._

My heart, in turn, sent the pain throughout my entire body until I was burning with torment. My mind implored for unconsciousness; my soul begged for release. If only I could scream...

Tears rolled down my cheeks and I was biting my lip so hard I was bleeding; I could feel it trickling down my chin.

_Don't make a sound; don't make a sound..._

**_Hitsugaya Tōshirō_**

Aizen may have "derived no pleasure" from killing, but he was certainly enjoying watching me struggle. With my arm badly damaged, I was fighting at about half the speed I was before -- which was little less than half my normal speed to begin with. Yet again, though, he slowed down his strikes, prolonging the battle, wanting to humiliate me before I died...

"What is this to you?!" I snapped. "Some kind of sick _game?!"_

'But of course," Aizen replied with a smile.

_**Hinamori Momo**_

_Don't make a sound; don't make a sound..._

I was silent -- save for a small sigh of relief when Mariioqa let go and gazed into my eyes again, wearing an expression something like a pout.

'You're no fun," he complained.

Then he made a fist and jammed it into my stomach -- literally _into_ my stomach.

All the air was forced from my lungs, and I uttered a short cry before I could stop myself. I was immediately horrified with myself, but it turned out not to matter -- I could have done nothing to prevent the subsequent gasping, choking, and spluttering as bitter, metallic blood filled my throat and trickled out the corners of my mouth.

Mariioqa drew his hand out, sending white-hot tendrils of pain shooting around my upper body, causing my ribcage to feel as though it were being crushed. He thoughtfully examined his slender, perfect hand -- now stained and dripping crimson -- and smiled a self-satisfied smile, his huge blue-black eyes shimmering with delight.

**_Hitsugaya Tōshirō_**

I heard Momo cry out again and it took every ounce of strength I had to ignore it.

_I __have__ to ignore it -- I can't be distracted. I have to win this battle -- for both of us._

But a painful pang shot through my heart.

_This…all of this...it's my fault._

Then there was another, considerably more painful pang as Aizen's blade sliced through the gap between my ribs on the unguarded lower-left side, also piercing the lung. I recoiled, my breath coming in gasps.

Coincidence?

No such thing.

And I knew it then -- really, I'd known it all along, but I couldn't even pretend to kid myself any longer. This was only going to end one way. How could I spend my last few moments alive ignoring --?

I looked over and saw her hanging limply, torn and bleeding, her eyes barely half-open, in the grasps of the same two Arrancar from before. Standing before her, with blood on his hands, was a third. He glanced at me, impaling me with unnaturally large eyes that emitted a freakish glow of sorts, and winked.

I could not attack, as much as I wanted to; I could not help her; any move I made toward her would have me struck down in an instant. But I could tell her -- they couldn't stop me -- I had to tell her --

I called her name.

_"Momo...!"_

_**Hinamori Momo**_

The pain had made my mind hazy and foggy, and strangely heavy, seeming to weight my thoughts down into void. I was suspended in semi-consciousness, being slowly dragged down into the blackness.

Then I heard my name.

"_Momo...!"_

It took a long moment to register.

..._Tōshirō?_

_...Tōshirō...!_

Slowly, sluggishly, I struggled to surface...

_**Hitsugaya Tōshirō**_

_Momo...I love you._

_Momo...I'm sorry._

_Momo..._

_...close your eyes._

I don't know which I would have said.

I never got the chance.

One moment, I felt my hand wrapped around Hyōrinmauru's hilt, the smooth steel warmed on the surface and slick with sweat.

The next, it was gone, severed effortlessly by the blade of Kyōka Suigetsu, with nothing but a bleeding stump to show it had ever been there.

That, and the pain.

"Nggghhhaaaaaaaaaaah!!" I doubled over and overbalanced, falling to by knees. The cold ice was melted by my hot blood, both liquids seeping into my robes, along with the sweat that beaded on my forehead and trickled down.

I was grabbed by the front of my robes, pulled up, and lifted, my feet dangling off the ground. Of course, Aizen would force me to suffer _all _the degradation possible before he killed me.

He held me easily, at arm's length, as if I weighed nothing. I stared back at him, blazing, loathing.

'So," he said softly, almost as though to himself, "the 'prodigious' Hitsugaya Tōshirō is not immune to fear or pain after all -- or defeat, for that matter." His eyes glittered, mocking and malicious. "How extraordinary."

**_Hinamori Momo_**

_"Momo...!"_

_I'm coming, Tōshirō, I'm trying..._

But the ice hit me hard, suddenly, and I was jolted into stillness for a few seconds more..

**_Hitsugaya Tōshirō_**

I looked over at Momo. The Arrancar had thrown her to the ice in disdain; she lay still, her ragged breathing the only sigh of life.

Aizen deliberately turned his wrist slightly, angling his zanpaku-tō so it flashed in the light. "Any last words?" he said, sounding amused.

I had last words, exactly three of them -- but Momo would not be able to hear me say them, in her state...

And I'd be damned if anyone else got to hear the words that she could not.

So I chose three different words.

"Go to hell," I hissed.

I wasn't surprised that this brought on one last smile, the most vile and evil of all.

"After you, Hitsugaya-kun," he replied calmly.

Then my body was impaled upon the malevolent blade of Kyōka Suigetsu, and my thoughts, my soul, my life, were extinguished by a blazing haze of excruciating pain.

_**Hinamori Momo**_

I surfaced -- just in time to see a flash of metal and hear the sound that Aizen's zanpaku-tō made as it slid into Tōshirō's flesh.

I forgot how to breathe, how to do anything but watch in stupefied horror, and absorb every last terrifying detail.

Tōshirō's limbs jerked involuntarily, and blood quickly began to flood up and spill over his lips, a hideous scarlet waterfall. I was morbidly riveted by the sharp angle the blade made -- it entered just under his sternum, buried up to the hilt, and the end protruded at the base of his neck.

_Oh god, no, this isn't real; this can't be happening...!_

Aizen slowly pulled the zanpaku-tō from Tōshirō. I had to hear that terrible sound again, and Tōshirō spasmed wildly as the ruthless edges of the metal did even more damage at a second passage through him. The blade was not halfway out before gouts of blood began to spill over it, dyeing it a heinously brilliant red.

I lay on my stomach, my own pain forgotten, but paralyzed by shock and terror, powerless to do anything save look on. Behind me, Skalag, Scarran, and Mariioqa were laughing.

Then Aizen released his hold on Tōshirō, who seemed to crumple in on himself before falling on his back in a tangle of ruined limbs.

Blood -- there was so much blood. It seemed impossible that it could all come from a single person, and yet it kept on flowing, bathing him all over and the ice all around. He arched his back slightly, his system trying to pull in air, to no avail. His last breath forced its way out of him in a sickly rasp. A bubble of blood formed on his lower lip and burst.

His head flopped to one side; he was facing me now. But he was long past the point of being able to see me.

And then his eyes, the most amazing, incredible, stunningly beautiful eyes I had ever known began to close, ever-so-cruelly slowly.

His eyelids met.

His stomach and arms flexed slightly, as if he were giving one last effort to sit up.

Then he went limp, his body succumbing to the lure of the bloody ice below.

But he wasn't gone...I could still feel him...

_No, no, Tōshirō...hang on..._

Aizen stood over him, watching, his robes, hands and zanpaku-tō smeared and splattered with yet more blood. He was smiling.

An instant later, I felt the last struggling ember of Tōshirō's reiatsu flicker --

--and die.

At that moment, I remembered how to scream.

_"Tōshiroooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!"_

_------------------------_

A/N: I have but two requests:

1) Please don't hurt me.

2) TRUST ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Now, if you'll excuse me, I'll be cowering in a corner...

~Raye Lynne T.T


	19. Chapter 19: Eternal Silence

A/N: It's baaaaa~aaaaack…

That's right! Hiatus is over folks, and we are ready to rock-and-roll once more, ahahahaha…

So, I promised that I would thank everybody who has reviewed, fav-ed or otherwise acknowledged this fic over the duration of the summer: Many, MANY thanks to the following:

**Maya-chan2007, Kinaia, KnowledgeandImagination, azulafan360, PrincessOfHeartsNYP Eyes of the Fire Lily, the_ultimate_dino, halliegirl, yozo, darklover, Rana, Sageheart, Blitch, larkinlover, Reflection of my Tears, Ulqy-chan, momoxtoshiro135 GirlWithGreenEyes, and Harpylove1. **

You guys make my life. Seriously, you know exactly what I wanna hear, but you also give me amazing pointers and inspiration (so my ego doesn't get too big :b) If I knew where to find you, I would come to your house and give you a hug:)

Or maybe that would be weird hahaha O~O

The point is, THANK YOU!

Quick note: This chapter uses part of a song – "Cry for the Moon" by Epica. Possibly the greatest song ever.

And now, I proudly present to you…the return of "Oblivion"!

-----------------------------

**Chapter Nineteen: Eternal Silence**

Too late! The key's a long time lost/ I'm trapped forevermore/ With the crippling irony of it all/ For I'm the one who locked the door. –from "Hall of Mirrors" by Rylan Hornall

------------------

"Suddenly, I know I'm not sleeping/ Hello, I'm still here/ All that's left of yesterday" – "Hello" by Evanescence

-------------------------

_**Hinamori Momo**_

_**Follow your common sense**_

_**You cannot hide yourself**_

_**Behind your fairy tales**_

_**Forever**_

_**And ever**_

I'd been denying myself the truth for so long that I simply couldn't do it anymore, not at all. So I was unable to protect myself from the sight of Tōshirō lying on his back in the centre of an impossibly large scarlet mass – unmoving, unbreathing, and most certainly dead.

And even though Aizen had killed him –

--it was my fault.

My fault.

Because I was the one who had been foolish, blind, naïve, _selfish _ enough to come here enough to come here. If only I'd thought for one moment, I'd have surely realized he would follow me. He couldn't have known that I would be safe here…he'd followed me and died trying to save me when I hadn't needed to be saved.

I'd been protected in Hueco Mundo…even if not for the reason I'd thought…not because Aizen wanted me back, but because I was useful…

But I couldn't think about that right now; I couldn't even think clearly at all. For what had moved up past the shock and horror was an overwhelming, _crippling _sense of guilt. A sob formed in my throat, bearing enough force to shake my limbs, but was too heavy to emerge into audibility; I swallowed it back into my lungs and it scalded its way down.

My heart was beating so fast that it seemed a steady thrum, and my breathing was ragged and shallow, as though in a wasted attempt to keep up. I shook uncontrollably, somehow rendered mute once more, powerless now in every sense.

It was my fault. I'd as good as killed him myself. Not only had I led him here, but I'd fought him and hurt him so badly that he had never stood a chance against Aizen. The only thing I hadn't done was deliver the final blow, and I may as well have---I'd done everything else.

I forced myself to sit up so I could examine my hands, blistered, calloused, and bloodstained. These were the hands that had raised the blade that had ultimately killed Hitsugaya Tōshirō.

Even though Aizen had controlled me to do so…had he, really? I'd been angry at Tōshirō; I'd _hated_ him. I'd _wanted _ to hurt him, to watch him suffer. Aizen had only to play upon that to manipulate me, even when I'd been hypnotized.

They were still my hands.

I found myself slowly getting to my feet. But my gaze was locked, unblinking, onto my shaking, bloodied hands.

My murdering hands.

I killed him. I killed Hitsugaya Tōshirō. I killed my best friend – my best friend, who I'd hoped so much could become something more.

I killed him.

I'd been staring for so long; I had to blink. When I did, my focus shifted to the ice under my feet, only to have my reflection staring back at me, eyes wide with horror. I clamped my eyes shut, fighting back t he revulsion I felt at seeing my own face.

Even when I'd finally realized what I'd done, when I broke through Aizen's control, it had been too late for Tōshirō.

But not for me.

I'd been strong enough to break the hypnosis. Shouldn't I have been strong enough to help him? But instead, after luring him to Hueco Mundo and wounding him horribly, on top of that, I was too weak and pathetic to do anything but sit back and watch him die.

I killed him.

_**Only by revealing the**_

_**Whole truth can we disclose**_

_**The soul of this sick bulwark**_

_**Forever**_

_**And ever**_

_**Forever and ever**_

I took a step forward, opening my eyes. I felt like I was beign guided by an outside entity; I was a puppet on a string. I was pulled by the compulsion to go to Tōshirō, to force myself to behold the true consequence of my weakness.

Out of the corner of my vision, I saw Skalag start for me, but Mariioqa calmly raised a hand, and he stopped in his tracks. I'd forgotten them both, and Scarran too. They didn't matter.

But Mariioqa was right next to me.

'Looking for forgiveness…?" he whispered. "Why? What's to be forgiven, really? Unless…" he paused, seeming to realize, "…it's not Aizen-sama's forgiveness you want?" He laughed delightedly, a soft, bubbly sound, a child's cadence, pitched slightly lower. He grabbed me by the arm. His were doubtless murderer's hands as well, and they burned my skin.

"Go on, then," he whispered. "See how far you get."

And then he threw me forwards, and laughed again as I rolled head over heels across the ice.

I didn't mind the pain as my broken wrist was knocked about or the hole in my stomach was torn wider. I barely felt it, in truth; I was so haunted by Mariioqa and his ability to read my mind, even to his imperfect degree: he knew that I knew that I was searching for a forgiveness I could never attain.

I looked up, and there he was, all the closer, and I was all the more drawn to him. I remained on my knees, too weak to rise, and I pulled myself along with a single arm, closer, closer, my heart rising in my throat.

_Tōshirō._

My lips formed his name but not a sound could pass them. I was kneeling in his blood now, but I didn't care. I let out a shaking breath and reached out a trembling hand, brushing my fingertips through his hair, white as the snow that has ceased to fall the moment his reitsu had vanished. His hair was sticky with blood, blood that I had spilled…Tōshirō, being touched now by the hands that had killed him…

My fingers traced themselves over his face, as much as it hurt me to do so. But my hands had turned on me; they wanted me to suffer…

His skin was so _cold_ and the angled contours of his cheekbone and jaw seemed so sharp. A faint spiderweb of tiny blue veins spread over his closed eyelids, and a few wayward snowflakes clung to the black fringe of his eyelashes.

My hands seemed to be convinced that I wasn't hurting enough; of an accord not my own, it seemed, I took him in my arms, placing his head and shoulders in my lap. So, so cold…and strangely light, as if his soul had accounted for most of his weight. His soul that was now gone forever and ever and ever…

I was holding him in my arms, but at the same time, he was far beyond my reach.

I took in a breath, which shuddered as another sob tried to claw its way out. As my vision clouded, the scratch under my eye burned from the salty tears that poured from my eyes. The clear water mixed with the red and carved its way down my cheek, dropping off my chin and onto Tōshirō, the red beads shining on his all-too-still face.

I'd seen Tōshirō sleeping before, and it had made me smile to see him looking so calm and peaceful. They say that people who have died only appear to be sleeping, and I'd found this to often be true. But Tōshirō didn't look asleep; he looked…dead. Tōshirō was dead.

And even now I continued to deface his form with more blood as my scarlet tears continued to fall. The blood and tears of the guilty met the corpse of the innocent.

_**Eternal silence**_

_**Cries out for justice**_

_**Forgiveness is not for sale**_

_**Nor is the will to forget**_

__Another sob struggled to sound. Only a whimper escaped. It was something, though. I'd broken the spell of silence.

But it had changed nothing. Nothing could ever reverse what I had done.

Tōshirō

I love you

Gone

Forever

Out of reach

No, come back

But you cant

Tōshirō

No, no, Tōshirō

Dead

_Murderer._

I killed you.

Gone

Forever

Gone forever

No!

_Yes._

I had no more strength left to fight the truth.

But the truth was agony…

I threw my head back and screamed.

It was a scram of which I couldn't hear the words – it may have been a cry f wistful denial, a useless plea for forgiveness, or simply calling his name. It ripped the inside of my lungs and throat raw with its force; it was a cry from the very depths of my soul, the sound my heart made as it shattered into irreparable pieces.

The sound snapped off into a heavy, suffocating choking and sobbing which had both mine and Tōshirō's face was glistening with tears of blood.

_No…please…please…_

Suddenly, I was torn away from him and I cried out, reflexively grasping at the empty space between us. Just as quickly I was placed on my feet again and Aizen released me, stepping back, filling my vision.

As my former captain regarded me without a word, I began shaking. For I now felt something I'd never felt before upon looking at him: _fear._

_**You can't go on by**_

_**Hiding yourself**_

_**Behind old-fashioned fairy tales**_

_**Nor keep washing your hands in innocence**_

__Run. Run. Run.

The instant I moved to take a step back, though, he calmly reached out one hand and grabbed me by the throat; his thumb and forefinger grasped my jaw, easily forcing me to look up at him. There was an infinite amount of strength in his narrow hands; with a single twist of his wrist, he could break my neck, too. I sobbed in equal parts anguish and terror.

'It's useless to cry, Hinamori," said Aizen, with a renewed semblance of kindness. "It won't change anything. Besides – did I not tell you this would happen? Perhaps not in so many words…"

'You—you—" I started. _Monster, _I wanted to call him. But how could I, when I was no better? Instead, I choked out,

"Kill me."

His eyes flickered for an instant, betraying his surprise.

'Please," I begged, the tears still flowing freely. "Please, please, kill me." _I don't deserve to live. I have no desire to live. I lured the one I care most about in the world to his death, consequently betraying all the Gotei 13. They'll kill me anyway. The only way I'll survive is if I keep on serving Aizen. Never again will I do that! Never, never!_

_"_Please."

He recovered quickly. "As much as you've disappointed me, you've hardly worn out your usefulness," he replied. "You may have very nearly achieved your full potential as a shinigami. As a Vaizaard, however…" he trailed off purposefully.

"N-no! I-I won't serve you anymore!"

His eyes glittered. 'I'm afraid you don't get a choice in the matter. The Hogyōku is fully awakened, and now more powerful than ever. Hollowfication is a painful process, even more so when the Hogyōku's power is increased…at its current stage, I'm quite certain the experience will be more than enough to drive one out of their mind."

I forgot to breathe for a moment. "No."

"You certainly won't be in control of your own actions. You very likely won't even possess a consciousness, much less be able to recognize yourself as Hinamori Momo."

'N-no."

"Don't you know by now there's no use in saying that?" He let go of me, shaking his head slightly.

_I have to – do – something…_

Tobiume was beyond my reach. No sooner would I start a kidō than find yself incapacitated. But – if I could attack Aizen somehow..kicking and scratching wouldn't hurt him enough to grant my wish and end my life.

It was foolish, and somewhere in me I knew that it would likely result in another broken limb. But I was desperate; I had never been more so…

I prepared to spring. Aizen smiled, as though he knew what I was about to do.

Two hands rested on my shoulders, their touch as light and delicate as doves' wings. And yet my legs immediately collapsed under me; only the dove's wings kept me standing.

_Mariioqa._

The wing-hands effortlessly scooped me into slender, graceful arms that cradled me as though I were lighter than air. A soap-bubble voice whispered in my ear, weaving a numbing spell around my mind.

"Shhh…come now. It won't be so bad. You can forget everything, you know. All the horrible things you've done…all the people you've hurt…all the pain you're feeling now…it will all simply disappear…"

_No it won't; it won't; it will still be there, but I'll have been forced into insanity, so I won't care…but it won't disappear, it will never –_

I gasped and choked, fighting the sensation that I was drowning.

"Put – me down." I struggled weakly.

'Now, now. Close your eyes, little one."

"N-no. No! No!" I cried. 'I won't!"

Aizen was smiling. "Goodbye, Hinamori," he said.

"_Noooo!!" _I screamed, flailing wildly with my left arm and kicking furiously. Mariioqa carefully wrapped his hand around mine, folding it against my chest, and paralysis overtook my legs once more. I kept screaming though, while I still could, even though my words had ceased to make sense.

"I won't! I can't; I can't; I can't! He won't – never, never ever ---!" I was completely hysterical, my racking sobs making my words so much shrill noise. A numb, fuzzy feeling was slowly wrapping around my head, burrowing into my thoughts. My sight was fading; I summoned one last shriek before I lost control.

"No! He'll never forgive me!"

_I must do whatever I can to keep him smiling like that…forever._

That was what I had thought upon my arrival in Hueco Mundo.

The last thing my conscious mind registered was Aizen, watching me, still smiling.

_Goodbye_

_Goodbye_

_Goodbye_

_Goodbye, Hinamori_

_Goodbye_

_-------------------------_

A/N: Phew! Frantic stream of typing over! Yessssss! Now I can rest…

So…(larkinlover, I'm talking to you here!) was that enough remorse for Momo? Does that qualify as being reduced to a "useless pile of guilt"? I hope so…I did my very best…

I hope you enjoyed, as I always do. Next to be updated will be my newest HitsuHina fic, "We All Fall Down". If you haven't already, please check it out!

By the way, for anyone who reads Bleach on time…tell me, was I the only one who LOVED the last page! Yes! Epic arrival of Byakuya FTW!!!!! And Kenpachi, too…but he's nowhere near as cool…haha I can't wait to see what happens now…yay, tomorrow is Friday=new Bleach! Woot woot!

NOVEMBER THIRD=RAYE LYNNE'S BIRTHDAY, TURNING SEVENTEEN YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!

I wish you all a happy Halloween, and hope you get much candy!

Signing off again,

~Raye Lynne:)


	20. Chapter 20: For Whom the Bell Tolls

A/N: Okay! It's back! Ahhhhhhhhhhhh don't kill me, please. There will be no more story if you do…

You know the drill! Iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit's THANK-YOU TIME!

**Full Shadow Alchemist, KnowledgeandImagination, yozo, Ulqy-chan, Maya-chan2007, Harpylove1, Sageheart, Tomoshibi-chan, Kazeek, Judgement Zero, TheLittleStar --- **thank you times infinity!!! Let it be known that you rock! :3 Please tell me if I missed anyone….with so long between updates, I'm afraid it may happen….

Okay! After this….five chapters to go! I'm thinking this will be finished before Bleach itself is over…not that that will be difficult….the battle of Karakura has been going for like, what, a year now? XD

Oh! I also changed the ninth Espada! I didn't like Kubo's version much…so he belongs to me, as do all other Arrancar that appear in this chapter with the exception of Grimmjow. Also, my Spanish is non-existent, so sorry .

Anyway! You've waited long enough, enough blabbering from me! Here we go:

**Chapter Twenty – For Whom the Bell Tolls**

"_Ask not for whom the bell tolls; it tolls for thee." --- John Donne_

"_Where the angels that lonely?/Couldn't they suffice for anybody else?/Why can't everyone just lie to me?" --- "Yellow Butterfly", Meg&Dia _

* * *

_**Kurosaki Ichigo**_

__Can anyone be called crazy for wanting to protect someone? 'Cuz, apparently, that's what that white-haired kid for going after --- what's-her-name, Momo. I'd never even seen this girl, and Orihime was the first to recognize this as a problem.

"How will we – that is, Kurosaki-kun and I – know Hinamori-san if we do find her?" She spoke quickly, for we were travelling between dimensions, and the plan was to split up and begin searching immediately once we landed.

"You will realize that the two shinigami reiatsu that do not belong to Aizen, Tōsen, Ichimaru, or any among us can only belong to Hitsugaya-taichō and Hinamori-fukutaichō," said Byakuya. "Bear in mind, however, that Hinamori-fukutaichō is not a priority."

"With all intended respect – she is for me," said Izuru firmly.

Byakuya replied simply, "We were given our orders."

"A long-standing friendship will not be so easily swayed," said Rangiku.

"We are bringing Hinamori out _alive_, no matter what the sōtaichō says," said Renji.

"I believe Yamamoto-sōtaichō was only taking into account the very real likelihood of Hinamori-fukutaichō not being in an ideal state of mental stability," said Yoruichi. "That is assuming she is still alive to begin with. But after all she's been through --- he may even see death as a mercy."

Jeez. I felt sorry for this Momo girl, and I didn't even know her. Just another reason to hate Aizen – as if we needed any more.

I couldn't blame Tōshirō for going after her. I'd've done the same. Heck, I _had_ done it, for Rukia, and I'd do it again, too.

"So long as you don't put yourselves at any additional risk, you may do what you feel is necessary to bring Hinamori-fukutaichō back with us," Byakuya conceded. He added, more quietly, "Only a small part of all of this is her fault."

"Quickly, we must affirm how we are going to split up," Yoruichi interrupted.

I felt a hand grasp the sleeve of my shihakushō; I looked to see Orihime, who pulled her hand away quickly, turning red.

Someone punched me in the shoulder, and I saw Rukia grinning at me.

"It's been awhile, eh?" she said.

"Sure has," I agreed.

Renji joined us, too, placing a protective hand on Rukia's shoulder.

_Hey…wait a second…are they--?_

_ Nah…_

I looked around, seeing Yoruichi and Soi Fong had paired off, and Rangiku, Izuru, and Shuuhei were a team. Byakuya remained alone. Having fought the guy, I was pretty sure it was safe to say he wouldn't need help.

With that, I felt sand under my feet and sun on my back, with hot desert wind blowing in my ears. In the distance was the castle, Las Noches.

"Let's go," said Rangiku, strangely grim.

We were off and running.

_**Soi Fong**_

__Yoruichi-sama and I reached the castle's outer wall before encountering our first opponents. I was relieved – it would have been folly to not expect to meet resistance, and a barren path could only mean a trap.

There were two of them, and they leapt off the wall, somersaulted in the air, and landed before us in perfect unison, revealing themselves to be identical twins, female. Both had short black hair and icy-blue eyes and wore short, fitted white dresses slit up the thighs. Delicate threads of bone formed a diadem on each of their brows. They carried their zanpaku-tō strapped across their backs. They were tall, slender, and fit; at a glance I could tell that their field was hand-to-hand combat.

I smiled, knowing Yoruichi-sama was doing the same.

_Perfect._

_**Kurosaki Ichigo**_

__We didn't make it all that far before we ran into an Arrancar. He seemed to appear out of nowhere; one second there was no one, the next, there he was. It surprised me, though, how small he was – only Rukia was shorter than him. But even with his height and somewhat skinny build, he didn't look like a kid. His hair was a dark gold colour, his eyes were bright yellow, and his clothes were white. He smiled when he saw us, showing teeth that were black and shiny, with two fangs almost as long as my thumbs.

"Four of you," he noted. "Well –" he corrected, "three – and a half." At this, he glanced at Orihime.

_Ha! He doesn't have a clue what he's talking about! _Orihime's ability to turn back time in an isolated area was way more powerful than anything I'd ever be able to do.

"It's perfect," the Arrancar continued. "Enough to present just enough of a challenge for this to be fun. Although," he sighed, 'I was hoping I wouldn't have to do this right away…but I simply can't kill you all in this form; I'll admit it. One of you, certainly, perhaps even two. But like this –" he shook his head regretfully. "Ah, perhaps it's just as well. I'll still have all my strength in my _resurreccion."_

He drew his zanpaku-tō and smiled again. "I am Yazlin Grohmecca, and it would be wise to fear me."

Raising the blade to the sky, he cried, "**Seize, Predador** [predator]!"

The transformation was instant – not to mention friggin' scary. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Orihime's eyes go wide; she pressed a hand over her mouth to hold back a scream.

'Holy shit," said Renji.

Yeah, that about summed it up.

_**Kuchiki Byakuya**_

__The attack came from behind, and I only just turned in time to block the blow and back-step away.

The sun was behind me, therefore my shadow was in front. Only a slight difference in its shape, indicating a movement not my own, had alerted me to another presence. I had heard and sensed nothing, and this was alarming.

I found myself regarding a female Arrancar of rather small stature, with long hair of bright blue and glittering black eyes. A perfectly round hole lay in between her collarbones, which in turn were covered in a layer of bone. She grasped her zanpaku-tō in one long-nailed hand, and she was smiling.

"Your physical reflexes are impressive, even after I tampered with your senses. I believe I have found myself a worthy adversary. I _despise _ a boring fight. I think that I shall enjoy crossing blades with you, Kuchiki Byakuya."

The fact that she knew my name was odd, but unimportant. Only four of her words were of any value.

_"tampered with your senses"?_

_**Matsumoto Rangiku**_

__We made considerable progress before an Arrancar appeared before us. He was tall and muscular, with stringy rust-red hair and poisonous-looking green eyes. He wore a horned bone helmet and his tanned skin was covered in painted designs. When I looked again, they all seemed to be faces, forming various grotesque expressions.

"What is this, now?" he exclaimed with a grin. "Shinigami? And I'm outnumbered three to one? Ah, that settles it, then – I suppose I'd better surrender." He never lost his jovial smile that made sarcasm unnecessary.

"I don't suppose there's any way you would simply let us pass?" said Izuru grimly, knowing the answer.

"Now why would I show my face if that were my intention?" said the Arrancar.

"In that case," I said, unsheathing Haineko, "we don't have any time to spare. So draw your sword and we shall pass, nonetheless."

"Now just one minute," said the Arrancar. "Pleasantries must not be forsaken. Introductions, please!"

"I am Matsumoto Rangiku, lieutenant of the tenth company of the Gotei 13 Companies."

"I am Kira Izuru, lieutenant of the third company."

"Hisagi Shuuhei, ninth company's lieutenant."

"That's better, don't you agree?" said the Arrancar. "I don't get a chance to fight very often, and I prefer to be able to remember who I do fight. My own name is Draxonis Pollany, nueve Espada."

_An Espada --!_

"Since I don't get to fight much," he continued, "I don't like to miss a chance to show off my _resurreccion. _It would truly be a pity if you all died before you got a chance to see it. So – let's cut to the chase, shall we?"

Winking, he drew his zanpaku-tō and intoned, "**Return, Hidra** [Hydra]!"

Then, before us crouched a hideous pale creature. Emerging from a massive shapeless body, which appeared to have no feet, were a dozen arms ending in bone scythes, and, balancing precariously, on snake-like necks six identical fanged heads, facing from all directions, where they attached to the roughly spherical body.

As fearsome as he may have appeared, I was unconcerned. Izuru's and Shuuhei's zanpaku-tō were designed for opponents such as this one. For this reason, I hung back while they sprang forward, calling their blades into shikai.

"**Reap, Kazeshini!"**

** "Raise your head, Wabisuke!"**

They leapt at the leering heads, about three feet above their own. In a flash, fountains of blood spurted from two necks, and a pair of heads fell to the ground and turned immediately into sand.

But, the remaining heads kept grinning; Shuuhei and Izuru, their feet on the ground, looked up to see all four pairs of green eyes seeming to glow.

Then each of the headless necks reared up; to my shock, two bubbles were expanding on each severed end. These bubbles quickly blossomed into new, complete heads. With a sickening ripping sound, the necks split in two, and the heads all swayed comfortably upon their own extensions.

"No way," breathed Shuuhei.

Draxonis laughed, one sound that emerged from eight mouths.

"We have to get them all!" cried Izuru.

As swiftly as we could, we moved around the creature, slashing at any part that moved. Though we certainly had removed all of its heads and most of its arms, within seconds they all grew back. For a few moments more, we continued with the same results, before I realized that Draxonis didn't seem to even be attempting to dodge our blows…

"Stop!" I cried, backing away, and the other two followed suit. We found ourselves staring at a beast with forty-six heads and sixty-seven arms, and we had all but created it ourselves.

We were greeting by smiles and forty-six voices proclaiming, "Now you understand! I am the Hydra of Grecian legend! I am invincible – the more you hurt me, the stronger I become!"

"There has to be some way to kill this thing," hissed Shuuhei.

"The body!" exclaimed Izuru under his breath. "We have to attack the body!"

But the unspoken question was, how could we get past all those limbs?

Just then, the air was rent by a sound that came from behind the opposite wall of Las Noches: a piercing scream that I knew immediately belonged to Momo.

_She's alive!_

I was so relieved by this that it took me a moment to realize what she was crying out.

_"Tōshiroooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!"_

For a full second, my heart stopped, and I froze.

_Captain---!!!_

That second was enough for one of Draxonis' scythe-arms the flash forward and enter between my ribs on my lower right side and exit out the left side. Just as quickly, he yanked it out, and I suddenly felt paralyzed from the wounds down; my knees shook and I collapsed, struggling to breathe through the haze of shock and pain.

_**Kuchiki Byakuya**_

__The Arrancar struck at me again, almost casually; I easily deflected the bow but it occurred to me that I still could not detect her presence with anything aside from my eyes. As well, I was strangely unable to become aware of my surroundings.

_It seems that all of my perception abilities have been lost, somehow…_

"You figured it out quickly," said the Arrancar. "I'm rather impressed. But, you are a captain, so maybe I shouldn't be."

"So you read thoughts, as well…"

"Meh—I'd rather I didn't," she shrugged. "It's a rather irritating side effect of my abilities. Most minds are all the same, and I get so _bored…_although it is useful to know the name of one's enemy. And, I must say, listening to the sound of a mind makes in its fear sometimes makes it all worthwhile." She smiled. "Let's get started on yours then, shall we?"

_It's a trick. She's trying to provoke me into attacking first, an elementary tactic._

Her smile grew. "Ah, I see your mind is more complex than most…I haven't been able to find where you keep your common sense. Yet," she added flippantly. "My name is Maeyestral Psychereine. That's all I'm going to tell you about myself, for now. The rest, Kuchiki Byakuya, you will find out soon enough."

_**Shihoin Yoruichi**_

__It appeared our adversaries possessed the rather eerie ability of speaking in unison.

"We are La Fuega." Their voices were an identical, languid monotone. "United, in perfect harmony, we cannot be defeated."

"We'll just see about that," said Soi Fong casually, then almost lazily lashed out at the nearest twin. They both spun away, in opposite directions, before rapidly moving forward again.

I raised my arms in an "x" to block a jab. The strength behind the blow and the speed with which it had been delivered confirmed that the pair would indeed be a match for us.

_**Soi Fong**_

__They were _fast._

My opponent and I were matched on a basis of strength, but her speed was fairly remarkable. I was pushing myself nearly to my limit to be able to block her strikes, much less retaliate. Only a few glancing blows even made contact. In my peripheral vision I saw that Yoruichi-sama, while in no danger, was faring no better.

I aimed at the Arrancar's throat, but my hand only slashed through empty air. Then her foot caught me in a sharp blow to the ribs; I hissed through my teeth as I felt them crack. My balance had been thrown off as well; she feigned a jab to my injured side, then swung a high kick that struck my temple, and I went sprawling.

I saw Yoruichi-sama hit the ground a short distance away, then scramble to her feet again, with blood trickling down the left side of her face. As I sprang up, I touched my fingers to the wound, on the right side, and they came away stained red.

The Arrancar came forward, drawing their zanpaku-tō as one, but – strangely, it seemed to me – they held them in opposite hands.

That, with Yoruichi-sama falling at the same time I did – and the opposite placements of our injuries…

With that, I realized how simple it was going to be to defeat La Fuega.

_**Matsumoto Rangiku**_

__As though from a distance, I heard Draxonis chuckle.

"Matsumoto-san!" cried Izuru, and I felt a pair of arms lift me halfways and rapidly drag me backwards, as I sensed the impact of another scythe-limb striking the sand.

I was carefully laid down on the ground, and Haineko was placed beside me.

"Matsumoto-san, can you hear me?" said Izuru urgently. "Please, open your eyes."

I managed to lift my lids partially and tried to sit up, still breathing erratically. Izuru put an arm lightly across my back, gently easing me up. Suddenly, a white-hot spear of pain shot through me like a lightening bolt, and I gasped and arched my back involuntarily. Izuru, startled, nearly dropped me, and instead quickly set me back down.

"Did I mention the venom?" Draxonis crowed in his forty-six voices. "I suppose not. Now, you can let it bleed out of you, but the blood loss will end your life. You can try and stop the bleeding, but I'm afraid the venom will remain trapped in your veins. So it's your choice how you'd like to die."

My heart began to race. _No – not this easily…_

"Our fight was over far too soon, Matsumoto Rangiku. Goodbye…"

_Will I – be seeing you again soon, Tōshirō…?_

_**Kurosaki Ichigo**_

__It was basically a giant scorpion – absolutely _huge,_ with black armour and serrated claws five times my size. Yellow eyes peered over fangs that glistened with venom, and a stinger four feet long ended the tail that curled over its back.

"We'll attack it from different sides," hissed Rukia. "Aim for the spaces between the armour plates."

"You stay back, Orihime," I said.

She nodded, looking miserable.

She had this tendency to beat herself up over being "useless" and "never any help". It was true that, while her abilities weren't really suited for combat, but she was far from useless. She had some truly amazing gifts that were, in some ways, beyond my understanding. Certainly unusual, different – and not to be underestimated.

It was fitting, really, since her powers were so much like Orihime herself.

"Be careful," she said to all of us. Her eyes scanned Renji, Rukia and me. I may have been imagining that they stayed on me a second longer…?

She ducked her head quickly. "Be careful," she repeated, softer.

"Don't worry," I said, my voice coming out more quietly than I'd meant it to.

"Come on now, little shinigami," said Yazlin, in a hissing voice that wasn't as loud as you'd've expected from his size. "Let's play."

_**Kuchiki Byakuya**_

__I was able to adapt quickly enough to my lack of perception. Though I was forced to rely solely on sight and rudimentary hearing, I was able to defend myself from Maeyestral with little effort. Attacking, however, was awkward: I could not plan ahead, for she would anticipate my movements in advance and react accordingly. Also, my feet seemed to be unable to "remember" the ground on which they stood, forcing me to step with an amateurish over-caution, for a stumble would mean death. Even in this state, however, this Arrancar was barely a match for me, and it was becoming evident that we were merely perpetuating a stalemate.

"This is no fun," Maeyestral whined. "I want to hear your fear---! **Chant, Mentecanto **[Mindsong]!"

There was no outward change in her appearance, though her reiatsu became noticeably stronger. Considering my handicaps, perhaps using my shikai would be wise.

As I moved forward again, my head suddenly felt heavy and I swayed on the spot. The tip of Maeyestral's zanpaku-tō slashed like a needle across my chest; a thin line of blood began to seep through my robes.

She smiled. "Found your equilibrium," she said insolently.

_If I do nothing, this brat is going to best me…_

Raising my blade, I intoned, "**Shatter, Senbonzakura."**

Even as I was saying the words, I realized something was wrong. But it still came as an unpleasant shock when nothing happened.

_**Inoue Orihime**_

___How could this be happening?_

Only moments before, it had been all three battling the monster, dodging its strikes, creating cracks in its plates with their zanpaku-tō.

Then it had seized Rukia-san in one of its claws and squeezed. Her spine made an awful sound when it shattered into pieces and blood spilled from her mouth; surely all her organs had been crushed --! The Arrancar had dropped her and Abarai-kun and Kurosaki-kun had yelled and tried to run to her. Kurosaki-kun had been sent flying backwards and Abarai-kun – the Arrancar struck out with his tail, piercing him through stomach with the long stinger, but the bulb at its base, nearly as big as a soccer ball, had punched right through him as well. There was an enormous hole in him, and so much blood!

Kurosaki-kun had told me to stay back, but I had to help! I ran forward to Rukia-san first, because I wouldn't be able to pull Abarai-kun to safety; he would be too heavy for me. I reached out to take Rukia-san by the shoulders –

Yazlin's stinger came down again, piercing through the palm of my hand and withdrawing quickly; the pain came so quickly and as suck a surprise that I couldn't help but scream.

"Orihime!" I heard Kurosaki-kun call.

"I'm all right!" I quickly called back. But then the giant claw swung forward and knocked me away, knocking my breath from my lungs.

"There's no reason to kill something so helpless," hissed Yazlin. "If you run away, little girl, I'll let you live."

"Orihime, go!" hollered Kurosaki-kun. "I'll catch up later!"

"No! I-I'm not leaving you!"

"We're gonna be okay! You can help Rukia and Renji after! They've been through worse; they can hang on a few – more – minutes," he grunted as he jammed his zanpaku-tō into a crack in the scorpion's armour, then pulled down hard to widen it.

'But—"

"Orihi—" his voice was drowned out as Yazlin released a _cero_ attack that Kurosaki-kun was forced to dodge. "Go!"

I believed that Kurosaki-kun could do anything.

I knew he could beat that Arrancar, one way or another.

But this time, he was going to need some help to do it. And I was the only one left to give that help.

_**Matsumoto Rangiku**_

__Izuru uttered a few words as he untied his obi and used his teeth to tear it into two long strips.

"B-bandages?" I managed. 'Won't that –?"

"I used a healing kidō to counteract some of the poison and to slow the effects of the rest, If I stop the bleeding now and bind your wounds, and I trade places with Hisagi-kun, he can take you back to the Seireitei and you will be all right until you can receive an antidote. It's all I can do…"

I'd forgotten Izuru used to be in the fourth division. "But—what – about you?"

"I'm staying," he replied, "because Hinamori-kun is still here." Then his face fell. "Matsumoto-san…I'm very sorry."

_I shouldn't have wasted time. I should have come alone. If I'd gotten here sooner, maybe I could have saved him…_

_ Oh, god, Tōshirō…out of everyone, in all this time…why did he have to be the one to die?_

My vision blurred; my throat burned; I found myself shaking, only to realize I was crying.

"I'm so sorry," whispered Izuru again, then he left my side to fetch Shuuhei.

All I could do was cry. Tears poured down my face faster than I would have thought possible. Yet, I wouldn't have thought it to be possible that I would ever lose _both_ of the people I loved the most.

_**Soi Fong**_

_** "**_They fight in mirror images of one another!"

Yoruichi-sama needed nothing more than that. The two of us kept our eyes on the other's opponent, reacting to what we saw, on the opposite side. With this, the fight quickly turned in our favour.

It seemed, however, that La Fuega had one last hand to play.

"**Flicker, Espejodanza** [Mirrordance]!" they cried. Then they began to fight, independently of each other, and their strength increased.

As she aimed a punch at me, the head of the twin I was fighting snapped back, suddenly. Yet, I hadn't touched her. For a moment, I was confused, but when I realized why, I could nearly have laughed... This was likely the most pitiful of resurreccions possible.

_**Inoue Orihime**_

__Would he be angry if I didn't listen?

But –

Yazlin's stinger struck at him, gashing his shoulder.

_No! Kurosaki-kun needs my help, whether he wants it or not! And that's just going to have to be okay!_

I reached up behind my ears and pulled out my _rikka _ pins.

"Tsubaki! Koten zanshun!"

Right away, he appeared, but said, "Look – are you sure? Absolutely _sure?"_

I was about to kill someone. My stomach twisted up at the thought.

But Abarai-kun, Rukia-san, and Kurosaki-kun would all die if I didn't. Even Hinamori-san and Hitsugaya-kun might die because of me if I didn't do anything.

I nodded firmly. "Ye—"

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Kurosaki-kun fall. Yazlin had stabbed him through his thigh with that terrible stinger, pinning him to the ground and reaching toward his throat with a claw.

"Yes!! I reject!" I cried, and Tsubaki flew towards the monster.

_Hang on, Ichigo!!!_

He swung his zanpaku-tō between the Arrancar's pinchers, keeping them from closing on his neck, trying to push them back –

I stood there, fists clenched at my sides, using all the determination and focus I could to help Tsubaki be strong enough.

Yazlin reared back suddenly, drawing his stinger out, and Kurosaki-kun pulled himself away. The Arrancar was thrashing and twitching on the sand. It was awful to watch, so I closed my eyes but did not stop focusing. Tsubaki had found what he'd been looking for – a crack in Yazlin's armour wide enough for him to slip into. Now I had to help him to attack from the inside.

But I could still hear, and Yazlin's screeches and wails made my limbs shake, and I thought I could taste vomit in the back of my throat.

_Tsubaki – just – just – don't make him suffer, please._

But it seemed to go on forever, and all I could do was stand there and tremble, trying not to cry, trying to block it out, and refusing to back down…

Then came an "Orihime—" and a hand on my shoulder. I started and cried out, but realized, an instant before I opened my eyes, that it was Kurosaki-kun. I took a shuddering breath an let out a sigh of relief.

"Kurosaki-kun – you're all right…and you can walk…"

"Well enough, and it looks like he's not poisonous…thank you, Orihime."

"…W-what are you thanking me for?"

"You saved my life," he said simply.

I shook my head. "I don't want you to thank me, Kurosaki-kun. I could never let anything bad happen to you, if I could help it."

He seemed to be thinking for a moment, and his bright hair shone golden in the sun.

"Okay," he said finally. "But if you won't let me thank you, you have to promise me something. Promise – you will never call yourself 'useless' again. Because you're not."

I had to smile, though I couldn't look him in the eyes. "Okay."

"Okay," he said, surprisingly gently. Something in his voice made me look up, in time to see the corners of his mouth lift slightly. For a moment, his eyes sparkled.

I looked away, blushing, my heart pounding wildly, trying not to gasp – but filled with a wonderful bubbly happiness beyond words.

_Kurosaki-kun just smiled._

_ At me._

I felt so light with joy, I thought I might float away. But as much as I didn't want to, I had to return to the moment. "M-maybe I should heal your leg?"

"No, Renji and Rukia first."

"Ah! O-of course!" Even my thoughts had gotten all mixed up. But I could be happy later. Right now, my help was still needed.

I took a step towards them –

But the sand under my feet suddenly gave way, and I was falling into a hole. I cried out in surprise, and Kurosaki-kun leaped forward and managed to grab my uninjured hand, but the sand at the edge of the hole where he stood crumbled away and we both fell.

We landed in some kind of tunnel, with the only light coming from the hole above our heads. However, there was enough so we could see quite well.

"I'll bet this goes to the castle," said Kurosaki-kun. "If we follow it – we might even get there without ---"

'Heeeeeey," drawled a new voice. "Long time, no see Kurosaki."

We both turned. I didn't recognize the Arrancar approaching us, but Kurosaki-kun glared at him.

"Grimmjow," I hissed.

_**Kuchiki Byakuya**_

__Clearly, she'd gotten control of whatever part of my mind was connected to my zanpaku-tō and nullified it. As long as I could not communicate with it, Senbonzakura was rendered an ordinary katana sword. I'd previously discovered that kidō were useless as well. No matter what attack I chose, even without reciting the incantation, she was infallibly able to read my intentions and utilize her elite agility to dodge. She was stripping me of my powers one by one. This had to end before I lost any more.

"Your heart is beating faster," said Maeyestral. "Are you scared yet?"

"I'm sorry that you believe I would succumb so easily."

"Suit yourself."

The muscles in my arm seized; my movements faltered. Laughing, Maeyestral tore a deep gash down my arm, from shoulder to elbow.

_Damn her --!_

"Mm, frustration. That's a start."

_There has to be a way to defeat this._

"Does there, now?"

In a situation like this, the only strategy --- was to not have one.

_Very well; so be it._

_**Inoue Orihime**_

__A small shape dropped into the hole.

"Tsubaki! Ko—"

"No, Orihime," said Kurosaki-kun. "This is something I need to do myself."

"Yep, me and Strawberry here, we got some unfinished business," said Grimmjow. "So run along, girl. I don't got any interest in you – and I'd hate to see a pretty girl cry when I kill her friend."

"I've fought this guy before," said Kurosaki-kun. 'I've got this."

_I know you have…and you lost._

"I'm not going anywhere," I said as firmly as I could.

"Looks like you've got yourself a second, Kurosaki," laughed Grimmjow. "If you're staying, girl, you might wanna put away your insect," he went on, glancing at Tsubaki. "If that's all the weapons you got, you're gonna wanna save 'em."

He was right. If I needed to help again, it would be best to save my strength. I called Tsubaki back, then, out of habit, replaced my pins behind my ears.

Another voice cut through the semi-dark.

"How, now? If the half-shinigami is allowed a second, should you not be as well, Grimmjow-san? It would only be fair, now, don't you think?"

"Oh—it's you," said Grimmjow carelessly. "I won't be needing one. If you really wanna, I guess you can stay. Just keep outta my way."

"Of course, of course." I could see him now, this new Arrancar, and even in the poor light, I was struck by the fact that he was very handsome, with large eyes the dark blue of night sky, and shining with something like stars.

"Come, girl, we shall watch from the side," he said gently, ushering me over with a slender hand, not touching me, but hovering over my back. "Don't worry," he went on in a soft, smooth, almost musical voice. "I don't want to fight. No need for such things. A little pleasant conversation never hurt anyone, and passes the time quite effectively, wouldn't you agree? Names are always a good place to start, I find. If you will, then, allow me to introduce myself – my name is Mariioqa Mareilai."

_**Shihoin Yoruichi**_

__So…they truly did "fight as one". The they became stronger with their resurreccion, they also became even more closely linked, to the point where, if one was injured, the other took the blow as well. I stepped back from my opponent, who recoiled and clutched at her bleeding chest as though she, too, had just been impaled upon Soi Fong's zanpaku-tō.

Perhaps it was for the best that they died at the same time, being as closely linked as they were. In that way, one twin was not forced to live a moment without the other.

Soi Fong wiped the blade on her robes and sheathed it. "Ready to go find round two?" she said.

"You'll have to go ahead without me; I'll catch up," I replied.

"But – you're not hurt?"

"No, I'm fine." _But someone else isn't…_

_**Matsumoto Rangiku**_

__My eyes were burning with the tears, but the searing pain in my ribs seemed to be fading, oddly enough.

_"You can let it bleed out of you," _Draxonis had said about the poison.

But it was escaping now--! Through my tears…

I found, when I tried, I was able to get to my feet, a bit unsteadily. I allowed the tears to keep coming. It wasn't difficult to do.

Shuuhei came towards me. He bore no serious injuries, only a few scratches; those bled freely, releasing any dose of venom he may have received.

"Ma-Matsumoto-san," he exclaimed, surprised to see me standing.

"There's been a change of plans," I said, my voice somehow remaining level. Slowly, I stooped down and picked up my zanpaku-tō. Raising it to eye level, I pointed it at Draxonis and hissed, "Growl, Haineko."

_**Kuchiki Byakuya**_

__I hadn't fought like this for a long time – with complete abandon. It was a very foolish, not to mention childish, way to fight, and this was not a style I had used since before becoming a shinigami. In this instance, "style" was a very loose term.

It seemed to be working, however. I focused only on one move at a time, refusing to be thrown whenever Maeyestral attacked my muscles or knocked me off balance. I received only minor injuries, for I would immediately adapt to the impediment and react to the nest of my increasingly limited ability.

My head felt heavy again, and Maeyestral lashed out at my ribs. As I stumbled back, I twisted away slightly and threw out my arm, slashing her across the base of her neck.

She staggered back, gasping. My blade had not cut her deeply enough to cause sufficient damage, but it was more than simply a scratch.

Suddenly, with a strange sprawling motion, she came forward again, and I instinctively raised Senbonzakura, which pierced her throat. Maeyestral's eyes widened, then their glistening black dimmed and lost all their lustre. I withdrew my blade, and she collapsed inelegantly; the widening bloodstains around her changed more of the sand at my feet to crimson.

I exhaled, slowly, feeling all my senses returning to me. I thus realized their was someone else there before I even looked.

"You…"

"I don't think I've ever seen you fight so artlessly, even as a moody teenager."

"It wasn't as though I had a choice, under these circumstances, Shihoin Yoruichi."

She laughed. "Well I'm very curious to know what could possibly prompted _that_ performance."

"_Extenuating _circumstances, I assure you."

"They'd have to be – I almost didn't recognize you!" She laughed again.

Damned if my face was slightly warm --!

"Anyway, you're welcome," she added.

"For---? Ah. You pushed her…I didn't need you to do that."

"Of course not," she replied innocently.

"You needn't say it like that."

"Hey, you don't have to get pissy because I caught you looking like a fool."

"I am certainly _not –"_

She laughed yet again. "Relax. I won't tell anyone. And don't pretend you're not relieved by that," she added, grinning impishly.

"A fight is a matter of survival, not outward appearance."

"You keep telling yourself that," she said, reaching out and patting me on the shoulder, as if I were a child.

'You have to audacity to –"

"It's as easy as ever to get a rise out of you, even after all these years."

"Now is hardly the time to play childish games. There are things of much greater importance at stake."

"Yes, I know," she said, her smile slipping partially. "It's simply remarkable at how little you've changed, Byakuya."

"I could say the same for you," I replied icily.

For some reason this was funny, and her copper-bell laughter sounded once more.

_**Matsumoto Rangiku**_

__Fuelled as I was by my heart-rending sorrow, it had never been easier to maneuver the fragments of Haineko around Izuru and in behind all the heads and arms of Draxonis. He appeared to notice nothing, but Izuru realized what was coming and began to back away.

'What? Scared?" taunted Draxonis. "Are you afr---" his mocking tone turned into howling as I moved my zanpaku-tō's hilt in deliberate slashes. Blood exploded from the inside of his body, spilling out of his mouths, choking off his wailing into a heinous gurgling. In a few moments, he was silent and still, the swaying heads limp and twisted in the sand.

_That's why he was only the ninth Espada. He seems imposing, but he is unable to run from such things._

As I summoned Haineko back into its sealed form, I was forced to wonder, _Here I am, though, and I can't run, either. What does that make me…?_

The tears were still flowing freely as Izuru approached. 'Matsumoto-san?"

'I'm all right now," I said. "But – perhaps you two should continue without me."

"Are you sure?" asked Shuuhei.

"Yes. I'll meet up with you again, later. I just…" I trailed off, not knowing what else to say.

Shuuhei awkwardly placed his hand on my arm for a moment. "I – I'm really sorry, Matsumoto-san," he said softly "Truly."

"As am I," said Izuru quietly, inclining his head.

"Th-thank you…now, please—just go on by yourselves."

Without another word, they turned and left.

I tilted my face to the sky; the warm sun dried my tears nearly in an instant. The light seared my eyes, but I kept searching – for what, I didn't know.

I thought I'd known true loss.

Gin.

But while Gin had simply left…Tōshirō was – _gone._

I looked down at the sand again; my own gaze seemed to drag me down. I collapsed to my knees, feeling the texture of soft grains through my robes. As I took in a shuddering breath, the tears came again, each one smooth and round, a minute world of agony. I exhaled in a whisper,

_"Tōshirō."_

The desert wind snatched his name from my lips and carried it away; only the wind knew if it would reach him, wherever he might be now.

* * *

_"I hold your casket, gently walk you to the grave/Dark clouds eclipse; the sun won't shine again." ---_"White Sparrows", by Billy Talent

* * *

A/N: Whyyyyyyyyyyy did I choose to do so many battle scenes? I am truly an idiot. That would be why it took so long to write this…I hope it wasn't boring…

Ha. I love Byakuya; I really do. But putting him in awkward situations is hilarious XD

So…I can't promise another chapter soon, as I am working on an entry for a submission for a novella contest put on by a Victoria-based magazine. Prize: $500 outright plus $40 for every printed page. I also recently submitted a short story to Seventeen magazine…prize: $5000. At ten bucks a word, that's not too bad :D If I win, I will buy my own computer and will be able to update much more often :) So, wish me luck, my dear fans ;)

And catchya next chapter!

~Rylan Puroisen Nekozawa


	21. Chapter 21: Shadow of the Void

**Chapter 21 – Shadow of the Void**

A/N: So, another late update…but you'll have to forgive me. I'm graduating high school in less than three months; it's a stressful time for me :S

I will save thank-yous for the end, because you're going to want to read what happens….

* * *

_And the rain falls down; let it fall to the ground/And the birds don't sing; no they don't make a sound/So I look to the sky; tell me why, tell me why/Do they all get to live and I have to die? – _"The Dead Can't Testify" by Billy Talent

_Where are we? What the hell is going on? The dust has only just begun to fall. – _"Hide and Seek" by Imogen Heap

* * *

_**Hitsugaya T**__**ōshirō**_

I realized something was wrong as soon as my eyes opened, and that was the fact that I was able to open my eyes at all.

_Didn't I --?_

_ …die…?_

Certainly, I wasn't in Hueco Mundo. Trees grasped at the clouded sky, twining their leafless branches into the mass of grey. Surrounding me were the ruins of many stone structures, jagged and crumbling, and strangled by brittle black ivy. The ground was a dry and crackling carpet of pale earth drier than sand and bone-white weeds that prickled my bare feet.

I examined myself; all my injuries had vanished, as had my shredded robes and haori. Instead, I wore only a white yukata.

If I was unhurt, why did I feel so strange? I drew breath, slowly; the dry air provided no sustenance. I became aware of a heavy, hollow ache in my chest. Robotically, I placed my hand on the area.

My heart was not beating.

_So…I am dead, then._

This revelation left me dazed. My core felt as though it could be leaden, but at the same time, I felt light, far too light. My reiatsu, something I had borne my whole life, even if I hadn't always been aware of it – it was gone. Hyōrinmaru and I had been forced to part. The spirit that had chosen me a lifetime ago could not follow me to this place where nothing was alive. Not even me.

_I'm dead. I died. I lost. I…failed…_

_ And now, I can never ---_

_ …Momo…!_

I'd condemned her to live or die at the hands of a madman. She would live as his puppet, as an expendable pawn, until he deemed her worthless and sent her here to rot alongside me in this god-forsaken place. That was her fate now. And mine, it seemed, was to live on, as much as one could live in a dead world, and bear the knowledge that I had brought about the end for the one I loved, dooming her to live the rest of her days in the kind of suffering where death would come as a blessing. I had to exist with that, and know I could do nothing about it.

This was the worst kind of agony. If hell did exist, than this was it. I could imagine nothing worse than being trapped here, forever, helpless, knowing –

_I've killed you._

I threw my head back and screamed to the pale sky.

"_Momo!!!"_

I was the only voice in this world, the only sound. Momo's name echoed, only to fade away as though it had never existed.

Suddenly drained, I collapsed to my knees.

"Why…?"

A whisper was all I had left in me now.

"Why? Why did Aizen have to choose her?"

Clutching my head in my hands, gritting my teeth, I started crying uncontrollably, shaking with sobs.

_Why her why her why her_

"Why her?"

Pride? What was pride now? A vapid frivolity in which it would be disgusting and heartless to indulge in this time.

"Why…her?"

Tears would make it no better…but they were all I had left.

"Why…why…?"

_Momo…Momo, I love you so much…_

"Why…?"

_Why? Why did it have to come to this? I should have –_

"…why…?"

_ -- if only I'd –_

"Why Hinamori Momo?"

_ -- if I could just –_

"I love her…"

-- _if only – if only --_

_ It's too late._

_ No._

_ No!  
_

_ "No!!" _ I yelled at the top of my lungs. "Please! Someone--! Can anyone hear me? Please, there has to be some way--!" My voice was so hysterical that I could hardly recognize it as my own. The tears continued to fall; my entire face was shining and the front of my yukata was dampened. "Please!!" I screamed. "I'll do anything! _Please!!!"_

_ Please!!!_

Echo.

Silence.

Then:

"Fascinating, how all you mortal beings are the same. Always grasping at chances hat aren't even there. Tell me, what exactly do you have to bargain with? …That's right. Nothing. You've lost it all, Hitsugaya Tōshirō."

The cool, lilting voice spoke in a tone that belonged to a young child. Standing beside me was a girl whose full height was only a little more than mine when I was kneeling. Her long hair was pure white, like mine. She, too, wore a white yukata, but hers was made of a finer material that seemed to shimmer. She had a sickly-pale complexion with a very slight lavender tinge under her eyes and jawbone. Her face, though of a child's proportions, was more angled than it should be, with prominent features surrounding eyes of a deep crimson.

"Though I have to say," she continued, ignoring my confusion, "that I am a bit disappointed to be meeting you quite so soon. I'd had greater expectation for you.'

_She knows who I am…_

_ "all you mortal beings"_

_ …she's not a shinigami…_

My mind struggled to grasp ahold of a concept I'd never much thought of before, certainly not enough to have believed…

"Are – are you --- God?"

The girl laughed, a musical, light-hearted trill.

"You would like that, wouldn't you? It would ease your mind to know that there was some higher power with an element of control, someone who could make it okay with a snap of his all-powerful fingers, wouldn't it? Not necessarily _would…_but _could, _always _could." _ She smiled, showing subtly pointed teeth. "Well, let me tell you, Hitsugaya Tōshirō, there is no God, no Almighty One, no Creator. Life exists all around us, waiting to be harnessed, and all souls create themselves. Even I cannot create another –but I _can_ destroy them."

"So…who are you?"

"I have no name. I am called the Destroyer or the Curse by some. Mostly, though, I am known as the embodiment of Death, which simply makes what I am a little easier to understand. But know that I do not bring about one's death; I am but the judge of what happens after. I'm sure you're familiar with the terms 'heaven' and 'hell', yes? Those words apply here, however loosely. Aren't you curious to know which one you're in?"

"I'm well aware," I replied, softly. Gathering my strength, I demanded, "Why are you telling me all this? Are you here to mock me? You shouldn't waste your efforts. Nothing can make me suffer worse than I am now."

The girl seemed amused. "So I sensed. You must know, Hitsugaya Tōshirō, that I do not speak like this to everyone. Your reaction to arriving here was identical to those of the vast majority, with one exception. You are one of the rare few whose tears are not shed for himself, but for someone else. A 'Hinamori Momo' in your case. She is very precious to you, yes?"

"Yes," I replied quietly.

Death sat down beside me. "Tell me more." She sounded exactly like the curious little girl whom she only barely resembled.

I spoke very levelly, almost tonelessly.

"She was my best friend for as long as I've known her, and then I realized that I loved her. But I made so many mistakes…I never told her…and now—" my throat tightened "—I've condemned her to live the rest of her life in service to a monster that will eventually kill her. It's all my fault. My pride forced her into that situation and I – couldn't save her." My vision blurred, and I bowed my head as a single tear fell from my eyes. I looked up to meet the curious yet impassive stare of Death.

"I don't care that I'm dead," I said. "All I wanted was for Momo to be free. But I failed. Except –" I did my best to match Death's stare. "I don't think that you would be talking to me now unless – unless you know something. Please, tell me. I said I'd do anything – I meant it. I have nothing to lose now."

Death smirked. "That's what you think," she said. "But, if I were you, I wouldn't be so quick to give up my place in heaven."

"What--?" I looked around at the barren, crumbling world around me. "This is – heaven? All this death? And there's no one else…"

"What do you mean, Hitsugaya Tōshirō? There's plenty of others here. You're saying you don't see them?"

"…I don't."

"and surely you can see how beautiful this place is? Well…I suppose you can't, You're not letting yourself; you're too upset. Don't worry. You'll come around, in time. And, with acceptance, you will this world, La Utopie, how it truly is. You needn't be lonely forever. You can even find your possessive spirit, or one of its embodiments, at least. Yours was Hyōrinmaru, yes? Though you will never again battle together – there are no wars here – you can certainly meet again. But, if you decide you cannot be happy here, you ay choose reincarnation."

Had my heart been beating, it would have skipped. "You mean --?"

"Not so fast," Death cautioned. "if that is what you choose, you will be reborn as a human, in any one of the many countries in the human world. Though your spirit will remain essentially the same, you will be born with a different face and, excepting pure coincidence, given a different name. You will have none of your memories. You will forget you ever knew a Hinamori Momo. You may find her again, someday, I suppose…but she too will look differently, her name will have changed, and she will have forgotten you. She might be reborn anywhere in the world. And, depending on how long she remains in her current circumstances, by the time she reaches the human world, you may have already passed on to the Soul Society once again, seeing as how time moves so differently.

"What I'm saying, Hitsugaya Tōshirō, is if you choose new life, you will be free of the pain you feel now. But it is almost certain you won't see Hinamori Momo again."

The direct, matter-of-fact words being delivered in a child's voice only made them seem to mock me. The heavy, hollow feeling in my chest intensified. "So…those are my only choices?"

Her smile widened. "I didn't say that, now, did I?"

I imagined I could feel my heart in my throat.

"You say you have nothing to lose…but it's not too late for 'hell'…" here eyes sparkled. "I do not like you, Hitsugaya Tōshirō. I hold you in no special favour or regard. I am simply offering you this chance because your situation intrigues me, and I would enjoy watching someone of your character play this little game. Know, however, that it is all one to me if you succeed or fail."

My mouth was dry. "Wh-what is this 'chance'?"

She went o as though she hadn't heard me.

"I am not the ultimate authority. There are certain laws of the universe that cannot be broken by anyone, else the consequences would be disastrous. The laws maintain balance throughout all the worlds. Throughout natural occurrences, existing bridges from one world to another, and the reincarnation cycle, the balance can regulate itself. But should the laws be surpassed, the results would be catastrophic. Entire worlds could vanish suddenly, never to be seen again."

_That's exactly what could happen if Aizen succeeds in making the Ou Ken…_

"For the dead to return without being reincarnated anew would violate every law of the universe and sway the balance too far. That is why such laws can never be broken. However – with power such as mine – they can be bent."

I could barely contain my rising hope. "So—what does that mean---?"

"I can send you back to Hueco Mundo for a single hour."

I leaped to my feet. "I accept!"

"Not so fast, Hitsugaya Tōshirō," said Death. "There are other things you must know."

"It doesn't matter; I'll –"

"Many before you have said the same thing," said Death coldly. "Most have changed their minds, even after insisting they wouldn't. Do sit down."

Shaken, I slowly lowered my self to the ground once more.

"If you were to go back, you will be whole, uninjured, and at full strength. Hyōrinmaru will follow you. You will find yourself awakening in the exact place your physical body might be lying."

One hour. One hour to set Momo free. "An hour…" I murmured to myself.

The next words from the mouth of Death shocked me even more.

"It can be longer, if the balance can be kept."

"H-how much longer?"

"As long as your life span would have been. You can live as though nothing had ever happened. However--! There is a condition. Should you fail in the task I am about to give you, in order to keep the balance, a price must be paid for the hour during which the law was broken. That price will be nothing more or less than your soul. The soul of Hitsugaya Tōshirō will be lost forever. There will be no chance of reincarnation, only an eternity in the dark. It will be as if –" she paused, then gave a light laugh.

"I've been doing this since the beginning of time, and I still cannot describe it. It is better if I show you, so that you may understand the gravity of what you face." Extending a small, slender hand, she motioned for me to take it. Cautiously, I reached out, and her fingers closed around mine.

Suddenly, there was a feeling like I'd been hit in the back of the head with a heavy, blunt object, and I came to the dull realization that I could remember nothing, not even my own name. My vision began to go dark, and my ears felt as though they were underwater, unable to hear. As the darkness closed in, all feeling was slipping away; I was becoming incapable of feeling the hand (whose hand?) around mine, the clothes against my skin, or the breath that passed my lips from reflex instead of necessity…

…and then…

everything

was

gone

and

I

who

am

I

I

………….

………………………………………….

-----------------

When I came back to myself, I was on all fours, the dry grass pricking my palms. I was shaking uncontrollably. My stomach clenched, and I retched, but nothing came up.

There were no words to describe the experience, which had seemed an eternity in itself.

"A soul's mind cannot bear to be filled with nothing," said Death smoothly. "You lose all thought, all memory, all sense -- your mind cannot take it, and it is excruciating. That is L'Enfer, the 'hell' you may have heard of. You suffered for a single minute. That is what awaits you for all eternity should you fail, Hitsugaya Tōshirō. You will receive no second chances, no opportunity for release. You will remain in the agony of void until the end of time."

It was as though there was a choice. If I could be granted one more hour of life – that was one hour more than I'd ever dared to hope to have.

Besides, though L'Enfer was a terrifying experience, it had one advantage: I was not aware of myself as Hitsugaya Tōshirō, and I could not feel the guilt of what I'd done to Momo, because I could not remember her. But, what a sick way to escape -- !

A horrible thought came to me, then. Aizen had been able to manipulate Momo with so little effort – even though she'd managed to break his hypnosis, surely he had other ways of bending her mind to his will. What if he warped her so badly, and made her do such things that, when she was finally allowed to die, she would be sent straight into the void?

Every muscle and tendon in my body, tightened at the thought; I gritted my teeth and clenched my fists.

_NO!!!___

Never!

"You know now what you risk, Hitsugaya Tōshirō," said Death. "Do you wish to take this gamble, and receive your task?"

"Yes," I replied, without hesitation. "Please, tell me what I must do."

"Very well," said Death with a smile. "In order to preserve the balance between worlds, if you wish to go on existing in the world of the living, you must send someone back to take your place in this one."

"…You mean…I have to kill someone."

"not just anyone, else the laws of the universe would forbid this little deal. One cannot be re-given life by killing the first person they see upon their return. That's hardly fair. Therefore, before you are sent back, you must name the one who will take your place in the world of the dead. No matter how many lives you take within the hour, the agreement cannot be fulfilled unless the life of the one you name is among them."

For anyone else, in any other situation, this would have been difficult. However, it appeared my objective was not going to change at all. The only change was I had an hour to do it.

"As well, keep in mind that, though you will be given an hour's life, you are not invulnerable for that hour. You can be killed just as before, and you will be sent to L'Enfer, as you will have failed, and your soul must pay the price."

So, really – the stakes were no higher than before. Though Death may have enjoyed watching other unfortunates play this twisted game, I needed to do nothing differently.

Except.

_An hour._

"Do you understand the rules, Hitsugaya Tōshirō?"

"Yes."

"And…?"

"I accept."

Death's lips curled up, showing her teeth again. "Wonderful. Before we begin…I'll need that name."

_Simple. No choice at all._

I forced myself to speak that loathsome name.

"Aizen Sōsuke."

My voice was cold, sharp, and unforgiving. Just the way Hyōrinmaru would be when I buried it in the heart of that monster.

"Very well," Death murmured once more. "So be it. So long as Aizen Sōsuke dies during your hour of life, you, Hitsugaya Tōshirō, may go on living as you should have, and we will recount your adventures together many centuries in the future, I'm sure. If not, then…you know what will happen, and you and I will not be meeting again. Are we agreed?"

"Yes."

She smiled again, red eyes shimmering, and her child's voice seemed to sing mockingly, "Good-bye, Hitsugaya Tōshirō."

I began to feel light, weightless, almost like I was going to float away. My head spun with dizziness, and my vision swam before fading to a white that grew more and more brilliant.

All my sense began to fade away once more and, deep down, I had to wonder if I'd just walked into a trap. At this point, though, there was only one way to find out….

_------------------_

A/N: There, see? It's all good, right? You don't have to be mad at me anymore!

Heart and hugs to the following!!!!!!

**Sageheart, KnowledgeandImagination, Maya-chan2007, yozo, Jedi Healer, Puresoul231, chaosdaydreamer, HayesAJones, kbookworm3, talkstoangels77, and especially to XelaKitsune and Tsuki, her muse ^_^**

And I shall now shamelessly advertise for myself:

If you love art, check out my page: .com/

If you hate Twilight, check out this video that I made with my friends: .com/watch?v=5J5sp5QoYsU "De-Dazzled"


	22. Chapter 22: Fragments of Chaos

Hey all! I'm baaaaaaa-aaaaaaaaaaack~~

So, I know it's been well over two years, so I'll cut to the chase right away. Since it's been so long, I don't know who's reviewed/faved/subscribed, but you know who you are, and you are wonderful, so thank you, especially if you've been sticking with this story for all this time

This isn't the greatest chapter ever, but I'm getting back into the swing of things. The next one will be better.

**Chapter 22-Fragments of Chaos**

_**Inoue Orihime**_

_We landed in some kind of tunnel, with the only light coming from the hole above our heads. However, there was enough so we could see quite well._

_"I'll bet this goes to the castle," said Kurosaki-kun. "If we follow it – we might even get there without -"_

_'Heeeeeey," drawled a new voice. "Long time, no see Kurosaki."_

_We both turned. I didn't recognize the Arrancar approaching us, but Kurosaki-kun glared at him._

_"Grimmjow," he hissed. "Orihime," said Kurosaki-kun. "This is something I need to do myself."_

_"Yep, me and Strawberry here, we got some unfinished business," said Grimmjow. "So run along, girl. I don't got any interest in you – and I'd hate to see a pretty girl cry when I kill her friend."_

_"I've fought this guy before," said Kurosaki-kun. 'I've got this."_

I know you have…and you lost.

_Another voice cut through the semi-dark._

_"Come, girl, we shall watch from the side," he said gently, ushering me over with a slender hand, not touching me, but hovering over my back. "Don't worry," he went on in a soft, smooth, almost musical voice. "I don't want to fight. No need for such things. A little pleasant conversation never hurt anyone, and passes the time quite effectively, wouldn't you agree? Names are always a good place to start, I find. If you will, then, allow me to introduce myself – my name is Mariioqa Mareilai."_

This strange Arrancar had beautiful enormous eyes of the darkest blue, sparkling and bright but impossible to read. He seemed pleasant, gentle even, but I knew I couldn't trust him. There was no way he was innocent or honest. If he were, he would be trying to help Kurosaki-kun, instead of sitting and watching. But the only way I knew was because of where we were. If I met him in the streets of Karakura, it would probably be different, and terribly so...

"What's your name?" he asked, startling me.

"I – what?"

"What is your name?" he asked patiently, a small smile twisting his mouth into something somehow sinister.

"Inoue."

"Inoue -?"

"Inoue Orihime…"

"Ah," he said, nodding as if in approval. "A beautiful name for a beautiful young girl."

The sound of two zanpaku-tō being drawn from their sheaths made me spin my head around.

"Look, Orihime-chan, it's starting!" cried Mariioqa-kun, unnecessarily. Kurosaki-kun and Grimmjow-san leapt at each other, and the two blades met with a loud ring that echoed throughout the tunnel. I couldn't help but tense up, wanting to run to Kurosaki-kun's side, but feeling only a burning sickness inside myself knowing there was nothing I could do.

Mariioqa-kun's face was suddenly right next to mine. "Relax," he whispered, and placed his hand lightly on my shoulder. The instant he touched me, I could no longer feel my legs; I could not even feel as they gave way under me and smacked into the rocks. If I could not see them twisted under me, I'd've thought they'd ceased to exist. Mariioqa-kun casually sat down next to me, ignoring my look of horror. "There now, that is more comfortable, wouldn't you say?"

"What have you done?" I asked, my voice trembling.

"Oh, nothing permanent," he responded loftily. "Now, shhh, we're missing the show."

_**Kuchiki Byakuya**_

Since I'd re-encountered Shihoin who had led us back to Soi Fon promptly thereafter, it made no logical sense to part ways from them once again, although I would have preferred to abandon the arrogant smirk that Shihoin seemed to permanently wear on her face whenever she was in my presence. Nevertheless, the most efficient option, since our paths had crossed, was to continue on together.

When Hinamori's cry had pierced its way into our hearing, I'd felt as though a fist had clenched itself inside my chest. Soi Fong had looked stunned, and Shihoin sombre. So, Hitsugaya was dead. Our main mission objective could no longer be carried out, and if we were to follow orders, we should have immediately abandoned our plight and returned to Soul Society. But Hinamori screaming meant that she was still alive, and even if that turned out to no longer be the case once we breached the castle walls, I was certainly not willing to forget that Aizen had very nearly killed Rukia, not to mention Abarai as well. If he thought he could cross a member of the Kuchiki household in such a fashion and escape consequence, then he was most gravely mistaken.

As we circled the behemoth of a castle that loomed over us, it appeared that three may very well be better than two as we approached to see the thirty hulking Arrancar who stood guard at the front gates, which were closest to us.

Even with our respective reiatsu cloaked, they surely had to have known we were there, what with the sounds of the fighting that had taken place only minutes ago, and yet they gave no signs of acknowledgement, nor did they make any move forward to try and prevent us from coming any closer, which was rather arrogant of them, considering they had not one, but three captain-ranking shinigami coming towards them. Surely they had to be strong, else they wouldn't have been given the responsibility of guarding the wall. However, there were but ten Espada, and far more than ten of the gatekeepers, and all appeared more or less identical-about seven feet tall, with bare chests and burly arms, and heads hidden by large masks adorned with rams' horns- so it was unlikely that there was an Espada hidden among them. In short, it shouldn't even be a challenge.

A sidelong glance at Soi Fong and Shihoin was enough to realize that they had also come to the same conclusion. Soi Fong met my eyes and declared, "Let's not waste any time." Shihoin and I both nodded, and in near-unison we bounded forward in shun-po, stopping amongst the gatekeepers; Soi Fong and I immediately drew our zanpaku-tō while Shihoin assumed a position of combat, ready to leap.

Within seconds of each other, all the gatekeepers had drawn their weapons that they wore slung across their backs, which appeared to be a bizarre combination of a sword and an axe: a wooden shaft, long enough to place both their large, horned hands upon, bore an adjacent pair of curved axe blades on one end. The bottom was a long sharpened spike of metal, about as long as a wakizashi.

It only took a second or two to devise a strategy. The height of the beasts would be mildly annoying, but it would be a simply enough matter to cut their legs out from under them and slice their throats as they collapsed. Simple and efficient. With three of us fighting at the same time, it would be surprising should it take more than a minute.

I leapt forward at the closest guard, only to be jolted further than I'd expected by the explosion of a _cero_ hitting the sand where I hand been a fraction of a moment ago; immediately after I was forced to dig my heels into the ground to avoid running into another that hit directly in my path. No sooner had I found my footing on the too-soft sand than I was forced to crouch and parry three of the axe-blades swinging at my head. I spun out of the way and slashed at the leg muscles of one of them, but Senbonzakura only produced little more than a scratch on them.

"Hadō 33: soukatsui," I intoned, but the result ball of blue flame only succeeded in putting a crack in one of the ram-skull masks.

_Damn, they're armoured…_

NO sooner had the thought crossed my mind than there were four, five, or possibly six axe blades coming at me from all directions, forcing me to fall back.

_And they're fast!_

Perhaps we had misjudged how easy this was going to be.

_**Kira Izuru**_

As Hisagi-san and I made our way to the side of the wall, I could not ignore the anxious thought that kept cropping up in my mind.

"Do you think it was really alright to leave Matsumoto-san behind like that?"

"She ought to be fine," Hisagi-san replied. "She knows how to take care of herself…besides, you patched her up alright, didn't you?"

"As best as I could while in a hurry. She will definitely need to see Unohana-taichō once we get back, but…I suppose she should be alright for the time being, seeing as we won't need to be here for long…." I trailed off, knowing I would not need to say anymore. With Hitsugaya-taichō having died, we only now had to determine whether or not we could save Hinamori-kun. Currently her reiatsu was very weak, but still present. So long as it did not vanish entirely, we would keep moving forward.

Hisagi-san, too, was contemplating what I hadn't said. "It's a shame, really," he said quietly. The kid had so much potential…he would've made history someday, I'm sure."

The unspoken question still hovered in the air between us, but there was no need to speak it aloud, as we both knew what the other was thinking.

_Can we succeed where Hitsugaya-taichō has failed?_

_Does it matter? Whether or not we can, we have to. For Hinamori-kun._

Hinamori-kun was my own motivation, at least. For Hisagi-san, it was almost certainly something else…

We reached a portion of the outer wall that was nowhere near a gate, and there appeared to be no Arrancar around. I wasted no time in calling Wabisuke into shikai form and using it to increase the mass of the stones so they would eventually crumble under their own weight. Hisagi-san climbed over the rubble first, and I followed swiftly behind. On my way down, I stumbled and fell near the bottom of the rocks, luckily landing on sand rather than stone. As I picked myself up, though, I noticed Hisagi-san was standing, zanpaku-tō drawn, clenched in both his hands, so tense in his whole body that he was nearly shaking.

Only a moment later did I see was he was seeing, and my heart beat harder.

"It was a mistake for you to come here, Hisagi, Kira."

_Tōsen-taich_ō?!

_**Inoue Orihime**_

_I can't move I can't move I can't move…!_

"L-let me go!"

"Oh don't worry, I'm not going to do anything to you," said Mariioqa. "That's not my style. I prefer to not get my hands messy if I can avoid it."

I knew he was lying; I could the dried blood on his white clothes and the equally white plates of bone hat encased his forearms. I knew, I knew just by looking into his eyes that seemed like blue bottomless pits, that this was a person who liked to torment his prey and watch it squirm before he killed it.

But I believed he wouldn't do anything to me _yet_. He wanted to hurt me first by making me watch Kurosaki-kun lose again. Only after that would he…I couldn't let myself finish the thought. I had to have faith in Kurosaki-kun, and believe that he had gotten stronger, and even though he had lost to Grimmjow-san before, that this time he could win, and then he could defeat Mariioqa-kun too.

Grimmjow-san moved around Kurosaki-kun so quickly, as quick and lithe as a wildcat, and managed to put a scratch on his arm. A few drops of Kurosaki-kun's blood fell to the ground, and I couldn't hold back a small cry. I could feel Mariiqoa-kun smiling next to me; he thought I had cried out because Kurosaki-kun had been hurt, and though the sight of his blood made my stomach clench with fear, that had not been the reason.

At that exact moment, I had realized something awful. I was counting on Kurosaki-kun to win and save me right now, like a princess in a fairy tale, trapped in a tower guarded by a loathsome beast and waiting for a dashing hero to save me. Just like always. It had always been that way, ever since I'd met him.

And not just him…I'd always needed someone to save me. Whether it Sora-nii, or Tatsuki-chan, or Kurosaki-san, for my entire life, whenever I was in trouble, I'd always needed someone there to save me. I was always powerless to do anything for myself.

_I'm powerless…helpless…_

_So weak._

So I'd helped him defeat Yazlin-san

. Suddenly that seemed like years and years in the past. What good did it do right now? I'd immediately gotten myself caught, forcing Kurosaki-kun to have to save me again, and himself as well.

And it was possible that neither of us would make it out. Before my eyes, more and more of Kurosaki-kun's blood spattered the ground, and I bit my lip as hard as I could to keep from crying out again.

_All because I'm always so useless….!_

_**Kira Izuru**_

Had it not been a matter of life and death, the sensation of being trapped inside a void with no light, no sound, no smell, and no perception of reiatsu may have been merely curious as opposed to terrifying. But at this time, when death may strike down at any instant, I had never felt more helpless in my life.

No sooner had we come upon Tōsen-taichō than he had drawn his zanpaku-tō and begun to summon his bankai. Hisagi-san had only been able to yell out, "Kira, the hilt-!" Then the world as I had known it had vanish, and I could neither see nor hear nor sense Hisagi-san. Clearly he had been trying to give me a clue as to how to survive in this senseless world, and with the words he had chosen, I vaguely remembered hearing that Tōsen-taichō's bankai was ineffective against anyone who was grasping the hilt of Suzumushi. Finding the hilt, however, was of course far easier said than done.

I drew Wabisuke and held it upright, hovering on the balls of my feet, ready to react to anything that came my direction. My heart was pounding, sending blood roaring through my ears. Perspiration began to bead on my forehead, and I struggled to calm my breathing.

_Focus_,I told myself._ You must be more alert than you have ever been in your entire life, or you will not make it out of this._

Out of nowhere, I felt a rush of air against my face, like a blade being swung through the air at my neck. I had only half an instant to react, and I threw myself to the ground and rolled away, then leapt back to my feet and held Wabisuke at the ready in the direction the invisible slash had come from. I breathed in and out slowly….in, out…

_Focus._

In, out….

Another rush of air, this time a stab towards my back. I jumped back and spun around, slashing blindly at the spot from where the attack had emerged. Heart racing even faster, all I could do was wait for the next attack, but it did not come.

"Hisagi-san!" I called, with as much force as I could muster. But I could not even hear my own voice. I could feel my lips moving, and the vibrations of air passing through my throat to produce what should have been sound, but…nothing, not so much as a gasp could be heard.

It was all I could do to keep myself from panicking. I had no way of knowing whether or not Hisagi-san had already been killed. And it was he who knew his own captain's fighting techniques better than any other. If he was already dead, then I would certainly never get out of this blinding, deafening, darkness alive.

_**Inoue Orihime**_

_So useless…._

"Are you crying?" asked Mariioqa-kun, noticing my trembling – I could tremble despite being held fast by whatever spell he'd placed me under.

"N-no," I managed to reply. I wasn't crying, but I was very near it. Could I be more hopeless?

"All right, no hurry; there's always time for that later," said Mariioqa-kun cheerfully, but with a glimmer in his eyes that made my skin crawl.

_If only I could move…!_

_But even if I could…what then?_

_How does he have me trapped?_

Mariioqa-kun shifted in the corner of my vision and I noticed then—being unable to have turned my head at all—that he wore no zanpaku-tō at his waist.

_Does his power not come from a sword?_

"Don't you carry a zanpaku-tō around, like the other Arrancar?" I asked him.

He seemed surprised that I would ask that of him, but it didn't seem to concern him. "Ah, so you noticed. No, I do not have a piece of soul-steel to call my own. I instead of more…refined methods. It's not that I lack physical strength – had I been interested in doing so, I could have ripped you to pieces already. Oh! don't worry; you're far too pretty to be destroyed so callously. I prefer to make my way into the minds of others, numbing them and destroying all hope. I make my opponents feel lost in their despair and break them from the inside first." He lowered his voice to a whisper and moved his mouth closer to my ear so that it was almost touching. "So, my practices are more specialized perhaps, but equally dangerous, make no mistake about that." I shivered, feeling as though a bucket of ice-water had been poured over my heart and stomach and liver and all my other organs.

_He'll kill me….._

_Kurosaki-kun, I'm going to die…!_

_**Kuchiki Byakuya**_

Currently, the Gatekeepers were more of an annoyance than an imminent threat, but they were diminishing our strength at an alarming rate. Between Soi Fong, Shihoin, and myself, we had only managed to bring down four out of the thirty thus far, either by wounding their horned feet enough times to slow them up, or my deflecting their own weapons into others of their number. The size of the beasts made it difficult to reach any of their vital areas, and their speed made it nearly impossible to land more than one blow at a time on any one Gatekeeper.

"_Scatter, Senbonzakura,"_ I intoned, and my blade burst into a thousand razor-edged pieces. My shikai was more effective than any other attack used so far, but with the creature's armour, it merely cracked its exoskeleton in several places, drawing meagre amounts of blood. I was forced to redirect the blade-fragments back at the Gatekeeper twice more before it finally collapsed. In less than a second there was another there to take its place, and I called Senbonzakura back into sealed form in time to defend myself from the massive axe-blade.

_I admit, I hadn't expected this to be quite so draining._

I was startled out of my own thoughts by a sudden groan from somewhere behind me followed by Soi Fong's shriek:

"Yoruichi-sama!"

_**Hisagi Shuuhei**_

"Well at least now I can ask—why are you doing this?" I called out, knowing that Tōsen was able to hear me, even though I was faced with the bizarre sensation of not being able to hear myself. Despite this, I knew I had to remain calm and incredibly focused in order to get out of this. All I had to do was find Tōsen and get close enough to touch the hilt of Kazeshini. The biggest complication was the fact the Kira was in here with me, and, being unable to see him or communicate with him, I was in danger of attacking him by accident, and vice-versa. Although I could trust him to have the sense to stay put and stay on the defensive, both of us wouldn't last for long in this situation. This needed to end quickly.

I called Kazeshini into shikai form, stepping about quickly and making sharp turns so that the chains would swing and hopefully brush against something – rather, someone. At the same time, I needed to be prepared to be attacked at any moment, from any direction.

"Why can't you see that you've been deceived? You always talk about seeking the path to justice and righteousness-how can you say that this is it?"

I detected a slight shift in the air movement behind me and was able to lash out and catch an attacking arm – almost certainly Tōsen's – with Kazeshini's chains. However, my aim was not wholly accurate, and was easily shaken off.

Every hair on my body stood on end; every muscle was tensed, waiting for the next attack. Without being able to sense reiatsu, my perception of movement was focused to its limit.

"Can you honestly believe that following in Aizen's shadow will lead you down the just path?"

Of course, there was no answer. The seconds seemed like hours in the deafening darkness.

Movement! Directly behind me, and so close; I had only an instant to react -

My blood felt as though it had turned to ice in my veins as Suzumushi impaled me through the right shoulder, only inches from my heart, through where it would have gone had I not twisted away at the last second. I felt a hand grasp my wrist and place it on the hilt of the zanpaku-tō, preventing me from pulling myself from the blade, but also allowing my sight, hearing, and reiatsu perception to return, a multitude of sensations that, combined with the pain, were nearly overwhelming.

"I have no doubt that Aizen's motivations are purely self-serving," said Tōsen behind me. "But I will continue follow him, for though his intentions are narcissistic, his methods will ultimately create peace. Assimilating Shinigami and Hollows, two species that exist only to kill each other, into one species, under a single dictatorial rule, without the façade of democracy, will eliminate the need for dissent, for war. The initial cost for perpetual harmony will certainly result in much bloodshed, but it is a necessary evil for an eternity of peace."

"You've been misled—further than I thought," I replied, my breathing unsteady from the pain. "if you honestly believe that Aizen - gives a shit about Shinigami and Hollows - living in harmony once he's king. He's only- 'assimilating' them for the purposes - of testing the Hogyōku's power and for - creating an army to serve him. Nothing more."

"Do not speak of things that are beyond your understanding, Hisagi. I'm sorry that it had to come to this."

"But _I'm_ not sorry," I retorted. With that, with my free hand, I brought up Kazeshini and reached behind me, looping and flinging the chain around Tōsen's neck and pulling taught. At the same time, I delivered a kick with as much power as I could muster into his solar plexus, forcing his to stumble backwards, releasing Suzumushi at the same time, which slid out of my shoulder and fell to the ground with a clatter, retreating to its sealed form as it did so. A short distance away, I saw Kira blink as his senses returned to him.

Before Tōsen could do anything, I twisted around and thrust one of Kazeshini's scythe-like blades into his stomach. Tōsen gasped and choked, and I was able to wrestle and pin him to the ground, almost too easily. Kira came rushing to my aid, but unnecessarily, for I had already won.

"I'm not sorry," I repeated, "because I knew – from the moment you left that –if I could survive long enough –that it would certainly come to this. Surely—somewhere inside—you knew it would too."

"I had – feared it might," Tōsen admitted, his voice a low rasp as Kazeshini was still restricting his breathing. "But I had hoped – that it might wait – until justice had been served. Then – you might have - been able to – understand…"

"No," I interrupted. "I understand perfectly. I understand that – in the past, you have suffered. I understand that – what you seek - what you wish for is—something truly valuable. Your goals are admirable, but – your methods – are insane. There is – no good – to be had by forcing - a harmonious world upon the world's people. Who the hell - is Aizen – and who the hell are you – to interfere with the ways of the world or to – decide what is best? Not even – the most powerful of shinigami – is justified in placing himself in the – position belonging to the gods. Such arrogance – is folly. You were –mistaken – in believing yourself to be - above ordinary men. And in the end – you will see – that justice truly will be - served."

_**Inoue Orihime**_

_He'll kill me…_

_Kurosaki-kun!_

"_Inoue…._ _if you won't let me thank you, you have to promise me something. Promise – you will never call yourself 'useless' again. Because you're not." _

And then he'd smiled at me, something I'd given up hope of ever seeing, but it was the most wonderful thing in the world, and I would never see it again….

"_Promise you will never call yourself 'useless' again."_

Unless…

"_You're not."_

Kurosaki-kun believed I wasn't useless…I could not betray his confidence in me. If I gave up and died, he would never forgive me.

_I can't let that happen!_

Perhaps Mariioqa-kun and I were not so different. My powers were also one of a kind, being wielded in my shun-shun-rikka I wore in my hair instead of a sword. In fact, if any powers could beat his, they would be mine…

_I won't let you down Kurosaki-kun! I'll show you that you were right to believe in me!_

This thought seemed to light a fire in my heart, and as my heart pumped, it sent hot blood through my body, blood that was red hot and full of strength and reiatsu.

"_Santen kesshun! I reject!" _I cried, and my shield burst from me, instantly severing whatever hold that Mariioqa-kun had on me. I could move again; I was free.

Mariioqa-kun was instantly alert, poised to leap at me, but I left my shield up; its orange-gold glow highlighted the lines in his face, which was suddenly crunched up in a livid expression. I knew that as long as I could keep Kinagiku, Baigon, and Lily between us, I would be alright. I'd noticed that Mariioqa-kun had needed to touch me earlier in order to paralyze me. Just a light brush of his hand had done it, but he'd needed that contact.

He tried to use his speed to attack from behind, but my rikka-spirits were fast enough to match him and protected me from those brutal hands. Even still, I couldn't keep my shield going forever; I needed to think quickly about what to do.

Should I call out Tsubaki again? It was likely he was tired, and Mariioqa-kun, furious and on edge, ready to react to anything, may be abke to fight him off.

There was only Ayame and Shun-ō left…..Sōten Kisshun, the ability to negate existance in a confined space. I said the words, and Mariioqa-kun was in that confined space, confused and battering the orange globe imprisoning him. Focusing my thoughts and strength, I began to turn back time around Mariioqa-kun, eliminating from his existence the event of having been exposed to the Hogyōku and turned into an Arrancar. His tall, slender, white-robed form began to shimmer and dissolve, until he was a very small Hollow, a dark four-legged creature with a humped back and a wolf's skull for a head. The Hollow threw back his head and howled miserably.

I focused even harder, undoing more events in Mariioqa-kun's experiences, and the wolf-pup-Hollow dissolved too, and for an instant there was a small boy with silver hair and enormous blue eyes, eyes that were confused and scared, eyes that no longer held the desire to hurt, only to go home…

Then he was gone. His soul had become human again, and so had returned to Soul Society, no longer a monster. What exactly remained of him, I did not know, for I did not know what events had shaped his life when he had been alive in the human world an unknown number of years ago. But he was in a place now where he could do no harm, and likely would no longer be inclined to do so anyway.

Kurosaki-kun and Grimmjow-san had paused their battle to see what had become of Mariioqa. Grimmjow muttered something under his breath; I didn't hear exactly what it was but it sounded like "Serves the little bugger right."

Kurosaki-kun was tired and had several wounds that were bleeding freely. It made my heart ache to see him like that and I wanted so much to turn Grimmjow-san back into a human too so Kurosaki-san didn't have to be hurt anymore, or at least to heal his wounds and make him strong again so he could do his best fighting. But I knew Grimmjow-san would not let me heal Kurosaki-san, and I also knew that I could not defeat him like Yazlin-san or Mariioqa-kun. Grimmjow-san had a zanpuk-tō with which he could easily strike at me, and he was an Espada, so he was much stronger and faster than the other two. Even though I knew all of this, the last thing I wanted was to leave Kurosaki-kun. What if…?

Kurosaki-kun met my eyes and flashed me a thumbs-up. "Good job Inoue! Now go help Renji and Rukia back on the surface; they're badly hurt." He glanced at Grimmjow-san. "Don't you even think about going after her."

Grimmjow-san shrugged. "Why would I bother? It's all the same to me what happens to her; why waste my time?"

_But what about you, Kurosaki-kun?_

It would be selfish to stay, I knew. But what if I never saw him again…?

_It's alright to have faith in Kurosaki-kun._

I didn't have to count on him to save me. But I could count on him to come back.

"Inoue…go. Please," said Kurosaki-kun.

_Okay. _But what to say in response? "Good luck" seemed too ominous. "You can do it" too easily proven horribly wrong.

"See you on the surface, Kurosaki-kun," I said, looking him right in the eyes. I wanted nothing more than to go to him and wrap him in my arms and never let go, but there were more important things, so I just kept my gaze steady.

Kurosaki-kun, his jaw tight with determination, said nothing, only nodded in response.

With that, I turned away and, as quickly as I could, climbed up the rubble that had crumbled away when we fell through the roof of the passageway. As I made my way back into the light under the blue sky, I heard the sounds of colliding zanpaku-tō ringing behind me once more.

_**Tōshirō Hitsugaya**_

With a jolt, my eyes flew open to behold a field of ice and snow. For a horrifying instant, I feared I had been duped after all, but then I recognized the destroyed corridor in which I had fought and died only – minutes? hours? – ago. I could feel my heart pounding, a reassuring fullness in my chest, pumping life and strength through my veins once more. I clamoured to my feet and gave myself a brief examination. My previously amputated hand was back in place, and I couldn't see a scratch, bruise or burn on myself. Even my shihakushō and haori appeared to be in pristine condition. Drawing Hyōrinmaru, I saw it too, was fully restored, and its familiar spiritual resonance was sound.

So Death had been true to her word. Very well then. That meant I had one hour remaining to me in which to kill Aizen.

_One hour – last chance._

No time to waste, then.

_Let's go._

So…hopefully I gave Mariioqa a decent end. I'm not quite as fond of him as I was when I originally introduced him, but I think he has potential and will hopefully return in one of my works of pure I-made-it-all-up-myself fiction (although I haven't been writing any of that lately, either *sigh*)

Anyway, I know this is ages old, but I just have to say: at the end of the Fake Karakura arc, am I the only one who was fucking pissed that we didn't get to see Ichigo's dad fight Aizen? Apparently he was able to force him to a limit in his normal shinigami (non-Hogyouku) form, but we didn't get to even see how he fucking did it! This whole time, Aizen has been portrayed as this unstoppable force, in that no one can even *touch* him, and suddenly Isshin steps in and then he's near his breaking point, just like that? Not cool, Kubo, not fucking cool. That doesn't even qualify as a cop-out; that's just bullshit! Or lazy. Not sure which. *otaku rage! otaku smash!*

Speaking of bullshit, the Fullbringer arc was just that. And so is this current arc. Yet, I'm still reading Bleach anyway, even though I think it's gotten really stupid. Maybe by the end it'll improve? (Here's hoping)

Old rant, I'm sure many people have said it, but I needed to get it off my chest. Three more chapters people! Stay tuned for number 23: The Storm Before the Storm.


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